Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 3, 2024 5:04:37 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2016 12:54:31 GMT
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imsirius
Prolific Pea
Call it as I see it.
Posts: 7,661
Location: Floating in the black veil.
Jul 12, 2014 19:59:28 GMT
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Post by imsirius on Jul 24, 2016 13:19:26 GMT
Bil said "Someone saw the posts she was making about me and found her threw fb and then found me. This is someone neither of us knew." People keep saying that a Pea has "betrayed" Carblover, and yes it might have been a Pea, but it doesn't have to be. Admin pointed out that this is a public forum. Anyone with a computer and the URL for this site can see this. You don't have to have an account here or be a Pea to read this thread. This is posted from the bottom of the Home page: Users Online in the Last 24 Hours 0 Staff, 880 Members, 4,246 Guests. Look at that. Nearly 5 times more unidentified (unidentifiable?) lurkers than registered members. Just today. How many people here, in the recent meet-up threads, have discovered that they live in the same town as someone else on here and they hadn't known? It's quite freaky. And then someone posts "You live in Sticksville too? So do I! I'm right on the corner of main and second - where are you?" "I'm across from the high school, well what do you know?" and now any lurker, who might have only arrived here from Googling Sticksville, knows precisely where those "anonymous" Peas live and potentially who they are. I think that this is a lesson to us all - there is no safe place for venting on the internet. This doesn't mean that we need to delete our accounts, just be aware that it is not a private forum, and be careful what we say. Your post is right. Anyone can look for posts. But who can search out BIL and Carblover. Would someone really look for "posts about BIL?" or Invites to Drunk fests? Would they know Carb's user ID here and just look for her posts? My friends and family know I participate here, but they don't know the link or the name. They don't know my user name (except for DH). This is my private place. Even DH knows about "peas" but he doesn't know the board name (If he cared to ask, I would show HIM of course, but he really doesn't care to know really.) I don't use 2peasrefugees in any conversation. I just say "The peas" or my scrapping board. If you google peas or the peas..a lot of different things come up! Add that to the fact that in this thread, BIL himself CONFIRIMED that the person was from this board. When FemaleBusiness asked "you mean to say someone from this board contacted you (not a direct quote and too lazy to find it) he pretty much said "you read it right, congrats (well he spelt it congrates ) Unless he is just someone here with an alter just to rile us all up, I'd say 99.9% that the person who contacted him was from here.
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YooHoot
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,418
Jun 26, 2014 3:11:50 GMT
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Post by YooHoot on Jul 24, 2016 13:20:51 GMT
It's the same shit we tell our kids. Don't put it on the internet if you don't want everyone to know/see it. I'm always surprised at the amount of personal information that gets shared here. And that's totally fine, some people are okay being an open book. But so many accounts are connected these days (facebook to instagram etc.). It's so easy to find someone and it really doesn't take much internet knowledge to do so. I'm not saying the person who did the sharing is right (or validating that idiot in any way), but there are people in this world that are not nice. And extremely bored. And BIL..it's a good thing I'm not a teacher. I'd be red circling the hell out of your posts.
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Post by scrapsotime on Jul 24, 2016 13:35:32 GMT
How did I miss this?
Some people suck. That is all.
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Post by Belia on Jul 24, 2016 14:23:32 GMT
Looks like sdeven deleted her account......
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Post by christine58 on Jul 24, 2016 14:27:35 GMT
Looks like sdeven deleted her account...... I know someone else who did also Belia did she post on this thread?
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Post by hop2 on Jul 24, 2016 14:28:26 GMT
I'm sad that we are loosing Peas over this.
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imsirius
Prolific Pea
Call it as I see it.
Posts: 7,661
Location: Floating in the black veil.
Jul 12, 2014 19:59:28 GMT
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Post by imsirius on Jul 24, 2016 14:31:02 GMT
I truly believe this was personal towards carblover. I don't want to think it's someone who is going to start outing others for kicks.
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Post by christine58 on Jul 24, 2016 14:32:43 GMT
Well now. I wondered why this thread was resurrected. I'm thinking that maybe Admin should block BIL for harassment of a member. Adm has already weighed in ~ it is a public forum. And that is exactly why members are going to start and remove themselves. He came here to trash a member. No other reason. Others have and will continue to leave here.
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Post by Belia on Jul 24, 2016 14:35:27 GMT
Carblover did NOTHING wrong. As much as bil is trying to justify what a fine, upstanding citizen he is, every post he makes further reinforces my negative impression of him. (And bil can't blame that on anyone but himself, because I'm basing my impressions on his own words.)
You can split hairs all you want about the number of times that "fucking bitch" instead of "bitch" was used in the invitation, it was still a BULLSHIT invitation to a child's birthday party. I mean, come on.
Carblover didn't insult your child. She didn't reveal your name or location. I just can't see getting all riled about about how you have been insulted on a public forum when we don't even know who YOU are! I'm sure bil has his own group of friends or acquaintances somewhere that he vents to as well.
I hope carblover comes back. I hope bil keeps on keeping on, if he is so confident in his life choices. (And maybe if we've made him think about the impression he is making to others that would be ok, too.) And I hope the backstabbing wench who started this whole mess outs herself, then leaves and never comes back, and learns firsthand that karma is a bitch.
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Post by Belia on Jul 24, 2016 14:37:32 GMT
Looks like sdeven deleted her account...... I know someone else who did also bella did she post on this thread? Yes... at the top of page 3. I didn't open this thread until this morning, and noticed the blacked-out names. I'm quite a bit behind the rest of you ladies....
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Post by paperaddictedpea on Jul 24, 2016 14:39:54 GMT
I'm pretty sure that sdeven deleted her account before this thread was bumped back up.
Situations like this are why I don't friend Peas on Facebook or participate in the card exchanges, despite the fact that most of the Peas seem like really nice people.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 24, 2016 15:18:23 GMT
Situations like this are why I don't friend Peas on Facebook or participate in the card exchanges, despite the fact that most of the Peas seem like really nice people. (I don't even have a FB) But I agree, this is why I don't do the Christmas card exchange with peas, even though I think it would be really fun. It's also why I didn't list my location, even after the thread from a pea saying that she wishes we all would. I hope that I don't post too many details about my life, and no I feel like I'm second guessing every thing I post. I'm sorry that CarbLover felt she had to delete her account. As far as I knew her, she was a nice pea. And which ever pea decided to out her to her bil is a real piece of work. That's seriously messed up.
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Post by gar on Jul 24, 2016 15:37:36 GMT
I'm sad that we are loosing Peas over this. Sdeven/skipping stones was a few days ago now.
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craftykitten
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,304
Jun 26, 2014 7:39:32 GMT
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Post by craftykitten on Jul 24, 2016 15:48:27 GMT
I'm sad that we are loosing Peas over this. Sdeven/skipping stones was a few days ago now. Did something else happen?!
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Post by gar on Jul 24, 2016 15:50:27 GMT
Sdeven/skipping stones was a few days ago now. Did something else happen?! Not that was obvious, no.
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luckyexwife
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,067
Jun 25, 2014 21:21:08 GMT
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Post by luckyexwife on Jul 24, 2016 16:31:51 GMT
As do I. He has a recently added friend who looks very familiar to me, but I can't firmly place her as a Pea (although I admittedly haven't tried outside of relying on my own memory). And to bil, let it be known that while I believe your story, I also have seen enough of your real personality to understand why your SIL would feel the way she does about you. Your FB certainly portrays you as an immature child, and if you really want what is best for your family, you should really think long and hard about the way you act and the things you post. Well as you have found my face book. You must a a bad perception of maturity. I'm mature enough to find humor in things that don't require putting others down. But since you are freinds with my sil on fb. Why don't you suggest to her that she can have her venting forum back. I can say that if all of you knew me in real life and not through this 9 hours of arguing. You probably would have a total different perception of me. Actually if my sil and brother spent more time talking with me then about me they might have a different perception also. See I know that my brother doesn't know about this thread for the fact that she sent me a fb message after deleting her acct her. Saying that she would have called me if she had my number instead of messaging me on fb. Well I know my brother has my number. I'm pretty sure she could have asked him for it. But i would venture to say that she didn't want to get him involved either. My maturity is clearly shown threw out this thread after constantly being berated and I never one took a cheap shot at anyone. I believe is I was immature I would have had more hateful things to say. No my spelling isn't the best and I don't proof read my stuff and I'm on my phone so yea shit is spelled wrong. Grammar isn't my strong point. Iv also hid nothing. I didn't go to some hidden place to vent. I was up front and straight to the point. A lot of people who know nothing of my situation have the nerve to say they feel bad for my child. My child is very smart, very loved , and very well taken care of. I will not speak ill on someone's child that I know nothing about. That's not my place. back to the point. I confronted her here. If she truly did nothing wrong then Why did she immiditly delete her acct? this isn't the first post about me. If she had a problem with me or our situation my brother has my number they could have picked up the phone and called me. It's as simple as that. Family is a funny thing those are the people who are supposed to tell you they don't agree with you but love you and support you as long as your not hurting anyone. To help you in a time of need. Not talk shit behind you back. That's my version of family. Family has nothing to do with blood. It's to do with a bond. Knowing that if that person is down that you fucking pick them up and you carry them till they can hold them selves. This does not mean you carry them forever. But your their to help them up when needed. Iv had a super rough month of being screwed over and ran over and held down. To the point that I'm exhausted and to finally start getting some traction under my feet and I find out about this shit. Fuck yea I was hurt. My family was hurt. We have been nearly hanging on to our home due to certain circumstances. And to find out that someone we call family was talking shit about us at a very low point for us is fucking rediculas. So please let her know that she can have her venting place back. Have a very good night Well, since this is a forum where we give advice, can I share a little with you? Good for you for wanting a better environment for your child, that is commendable. If you truly have financial issues where you can't afford food, and almost lost your house, your wife doesn't have the luxury to be a SAHM right now. I know daycare is expensive, so maybe just a weekend job? I have friends that got creative with work schedules so they didn't need daycare. One worked in a hotel as a maid on the weekends, one did evening and weekend hours at Target (a nice perk was the employee discount helped buy groceries), one started her own office cleaning business and cleaned after hours and weekends, there are lots of options. Good luck to you, I hope you are getting out of the rough patch and on to better days. As far as the other things going on in this thread, I'm truly disappointed that someone had such a grudge against a member to do this.
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Post by mlynn on Jul 24, 2016 17:08:15 GMT
BIL:
The invitation you put out there was about a combined party for a 1yo and a 27yo with drunkenness proclaimed as an integral part. You have a post stating that if you want to have a beer after your kid's party, it is not a big deal. Those are two very different scenarios. Had your invitation been more in line with your post, your sil would never have posted about it. We would have never had the responses that were posted. For that matter, your sil and db would have had very different feelings about the invitation. You bear some culpability in this kerfuffle.
bil
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 3, 2024 5:04:37 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2016 17:15:28 GMT
BIL:
The invitation you put out there was about a combined party for a 1yo and a 27yo with drunkenness proclaimed as an integral part. You have a post stating that if you want to have a beer after your kid's party, it is not a big deal. Those are two very different scenarios. Had your invitation been more in line with your post, your sil would never have posted about it. We would have never had the responses that were posted. For that matter, your sil and db would have had very different feelings about the invitation. You bear some culpability in this kerfuffle.
bil
Seriously? You don't think maybe the invitation might have been embellished for the Pea tacky invite hall of fame? I really don't get the bil bashing, if you (general you) found out that a member of your family had been posting trash about you on a message board wouldn't you react in some way? Now I know the adult, mature thing to do would be confront them in person but sometimes showing that person up in public feels great. IMO neither side of this argument have behaved well.
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Post by freecharlie on Jul 24, 2016 17:53:15 GMT
BIL:
The invitation you put out there was about a combined party for a 1yo and a 27yo with drunkenness proclaimed as an integral part. You have a post stating that if you want to have a beer after your kid's party, it is not a big deal. Those are two very different scenarios. Had your invitation been more in line with your post, your sil would never have posted about it. We would have never had the responses that were posted. For that matter, your sil and db would have had very different feelings about the invitation. You bear some culpability in this kerfuffle.
bil
Seriously? You don't think maybe the invitation might have been embellished for the Pea tacky invite hall of fame? I really don't get the bil bashing, if you (general you) found out that a member of your family had been posting trash about you on a message board wouldn't you react in some way? Now I know the adult, mature thing to do would be confront them in person but sometimes showing that person up in public feels great. IMO neither side of this argument have behaved well. I would not be creative enough to come up with that shit invitation or even to embellish to get to that point.
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Post by anonrefugee on Jul 24, 2016 18:13:14 GMT
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YooHoot
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,418
Jun 26, 2014 3:11:50 GMT
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Post by YooHoot on Jul 24, 2016 18:59:05 GMT
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Nink
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,947
Location: North Idaho
Jul 1, 2014 23:30:44 GMT
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Post by Nink on Jul 24, 2016 19:12:54 GMT
All other stuff aside. There's a traitor among us and it sucks. Regardless of what people may think of Carblover, no one on this board deserves what happened. Is it a risk you take? Sure. But for one of our own to go out of their way to do this is the definition of an asshole and for another pea to revel in it is just as bad in my opinion.
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purplebee
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,738
Jun 27, 2014 20:37:34 GMT
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Post by purplebee on Jul 24, 2016 19:53:01 GMT
^^^^ This. Hate that someone has resorted to this. It will just make everyone think twice about sharing. This kind of behavior really bites.
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Post by hop2 on Jul 24, 2016 20:09:37 GMT
All other stuff aside. There's a traitor among us and it sucks. Regardless of what people may think of Carblover, no one on this board deserves what happened. Is it a risk you take? Sure. But for one of our own to go out of their way to do this is the definition of an asshole and for another pea to revel in it is just as bad in my opinion. I didn't like the reveling either. Talk about bad Kharma... I'm not at all ok with a traitor among us, though there is nothing I can do about that. That's just sad & disturbing. I must have missed the threads where carblover was a bitch because I can't think of one. Not even a pea I'd call abrupt, or feisty, or blunt. I know I'm here less than I used to be so I could have missed it.
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Nink
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,947
Location: North Idaho
Jul 1, 2014 23:30:44 GMT
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Post by Nink on Jul 24, 2016 20:19:42 GMT
All other stuff aside. There's a traitor among us and it sucks. Regardless of what people may think of Carblover, no one on this board deserves what happened. Is it a risk you take? Sure. But for one of our own to go out of their way to do this is the definition of an asshole and for another pea to revel in it is just as bad in my opinion. I didn't like the reveling either. Talk about bad Kharma... I'm not at all ok with a traitor among us, though there is nothing I can do about that. That's just sad & disturbing. I must have missed the threads where carblover was a bitch because I can't think of one. Not even a pea I'd call abrupt, or feisty, or blunt. I know I'm here less than I used to be so I could have missed it. I agree. I can't think of one either.
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Post by mlynn on Jul 24, 2016 20:45:17 GMT
Yeah. Carblover is one of my faves. I will make a point to stop on some of hers when I am just scrolling through.
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Post by mymindseyedpea on Jul 24, 2016 21:01:27 GMT
Hopefully the day party is for the son and the night is for the dad. If not then double wow, no thanks.
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craftykitten
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,304
Jun 26, 2014 7:39:32 GMT
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Post by craftykitten on Jul 24, 2016 21:13:32 GMT
Seriously, you need to read the whole thread.
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Post by gar on Jul 24, 2016 21:34:24 GMT
Seriously, you need to read the whole thread. Yup
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