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Post by iamkristinl16 on Nov 6, 2016 20:47:53 GMT
Alright, I'm boiling right now so I'm going to post here in hopes that I can get it out of my system rather than unload on my aunt/uncle.
My aunt and uncle post under the same Facebook account. It is often difficult to know who posted what, but everything that is posted is negative towards Hillary and democrats. They are ones that say that everything posted about trump is propaganda and shouldn't be posted, is biased and edited to make him look bad, etc. But then they post all kinds of things that are untrue and nasty.
Not too long ago one of them (I assume uncle) posted three memes about Hillary that were very degrading, with the attempt to shame Hillary for Bill's cheating. I pointed out that many people stay with their husbands even after they have cheated, and there are many reasons why. And that it isn't fair to shame Hillary for Bill's behavior. After all, they have two daughters and five granddaughters. Would they be ok with people saying those things about them if their spouses cheated? One of their daughters is democrat and the other republican. Democrat posted something a few days later that basically told her feelings about those posts. Aunt/uncle came on and said that Hillary brought it on herself, and continued to defend the idea of shaming Hillary. I stated what I had before and others also backed up the dd. Aunt got mad, had a hair flip about "you democrats" and emailed me saying to stop attacking her on Facebook. What?! I had a response typed out but didn't end up sending it.
They continue to post nasty things about Hillary, democrats, and so on. I unfollowed them because I was sick of it, and they are not willing to use common sense or critical thinking before posting.
So, yesterday a friend posted the video of president Obama's speech when a trump supporter was there, along with Trump's misrepresentation of it. I liked the page and made a comment about trump living in an alternate universe. Today, aunt/uncle commented on it saying "of course if it's on the internet it must be true". I responded with more videos of the two speeches and encouraged them to do their own research. They responded that the videos are clearly edited to show what the person wanted it to. Agh!
I am fuming. First, because I am so sick of this blind trust in ridiculousness! Second, because I purposely unfollowed them so I didn't have to see their crap and now they are posting on my friends pages. Third, because she had the nerve to say I was attacking her but this has been a pattern for them.
These are people that, until the last 9 months, were very close family. I don't remember my aunt ever saying or doing anything mean or hurtful to anyone. At this point I don't know if I can ever have a respectful conversation with them again. They Have posted so many things that go against who I thought they were and I don't know if I can forget that.
So, would you address this with them? If so, how?
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quiltz
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,693
Location: CANADA
Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
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Post by quiltz on Nov 6, 2016 20:53:34 GMT
Ignore & block them.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 2, 2024 16:10:27 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 6, 2016 20:53:39 GMT
Walk. Away. Ignore. Unfollow. Do. Not. Engage.
You are not going to change their mind. You are not going to get them to "see the light." You are just causing yourself aggravation. Those who agree with them are not going to be convinced by anything you post in response. Those who agree with you already recognize the idiocy they portray on FB.
Just. Walk. Away.
In the end, what does it get you? Nothing. Nothing is what it gets you. So why bother?
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Post by Sam on Nov 6, 2016 20:55:25 GMT
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Post by padresfan619 on Nov 6, 2016 20:56:39 GMT
Delete them from Facebook. The election is over on Tuesday. Some people are better in real life than they are online.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 2, 2024 16:10:27 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 6, 2016 20:59:31 GMT
Tighten up your FB privacy settings, or better yet just unfriend them. Engaging with people who ignore facts is pointless
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Nov 6, 2016 21:01:11 GMT
Thanks. My rational mind is telling me to just let it go, but the emotional part of me wants to address them about this. I'm not going to say more about it on the thread. If I did say something to them, it would be via email. I have mixed feelings about what I would say at all (if I did say anything) and will most likely not.
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Nov 6, 2016 21:03:04 GMT
Tighten up your FB privacy settings, or better yet just unfriend them. Engaging with people who ignore facts is pointless This might not be the right thing to say, but I just got the idea to say, "I was just reminded that engaging with people who ignore facts is pointless, so adios!" Lol. Although it's nicer than what I would like to say.
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Post by Hayjaker on Nov 6, 2016 21:04:48 GMT
I would back away slowly and never say a word about it. And in the future keep conversations perfectly polite.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 2, 2024 16:10:27 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 6, 2016 21:05:33 GMT
Tighten up your FB privacy settings, or better yet just unfriend them. Engaging with people who ignore facts is pointless This might not be the right thing to say, but I just got the idea to say, "I was just reminded that engaging with people who ignore facts is pointless, so adios!" Lol. Although it's nicer than what I would like to say. I know it's tempting, but it would probably just create more drama-especially since they're family. If you can't unfriend them, put them as restricted and really tighten up your other privacy settings-they sound like they're just looking for arguments. If it's difficult to start one with you, they'll move on and start them somewhere else.
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Post by leftturnonly on Nov 6, 2016 21:05:54 GMT
These are people that, until the last 9 months, were very close family. I don't remember my aunt ever saying or doing anything mean or hurtful to anyone. At this point I don't know if I can ever have a respectful conversation with them again. They Have posted so many things that go against who I thought they were and I don't know if I can forget that. So, would you address this with them? If so, how? Don't talk politics with family unless you know they agree with you. Period. You may think that they are insulting and they may feel equally that you are. The truth may be somewhere in the middle and you all are just being passionate. It's ridiculous to allow FB posts to come between you, IMO. Consider them passionate about something you don't want to engage them on and LEAVE IT AT THAT. You are still going to be family after the election is over and long after whomever is elected has come and gone from the office. That should mean something greater than trying to be right on Facebook.
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Post by leftturnonly on Nov 6, 2016 21:11:47 GMT
If I did say something to them, it would be via email. Write it all. Tell them all about how wrong they are, and then delete it. Do not email them about their political views. ETA - This might not be the right thing to say, but I just got the idea to say, "I was just reminded that engaging with people who ignore facts is pointless, so adios!" Lol. Although it's nicer than what I would like to say. Please, if you value family, do not do that.
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momto4kiddos
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,151
Jun 26, 2014 11:45:15 GMT
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Post by momto4kiddos on Nov 6, 2016 21:14:07 GMT
Thanks. My rational mind is telling me to just let it go, but the emotional part of me wants to address them about this. I'm not going to say more about it on the thread. If I did say something to them, it would be via email. I have mixed feelings about what I would say at all (if I did say anything) and will most likely not. I do not post or comment on anything political on facebook. I've blocked a lot of people within the last few weeks because I do not want their crap flowing on my page. People have made up their minds and you can't change them. The part that bugs me about your Aunt is that she emailed you to tell you to stop attacking her on facebook, then engages on something you/your friend had engaged in. In my opinion she has a lot of nerve and i'd have a problem with that. I would likely block her or unfriend her. I would engage in a conversation about it because you're not likely to open her mind any to her choice of candidates nor that her behavior towards you has been inappropriate
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valleyview
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,816
Jun 27, 2014 18:41:26 GMT
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Post by valleyview on Nov 6, 2016 21:19:57 GMT
These are people that, until the last 9 months, were very close family. I don't remember my aunt ever saying or doing anything mean or hurtful to anyone. At this point I don't know if I can ever have a respectful conversation with them again. They Have posted so many things that go against who I thought they were and I don't know if I can forget that. So, would you address this with them? If so, how? Don't talk politics with family unless you know they agree with you. Period. You may think that they are insulting and they may feel equally that you are. The truth may be somewhere in the middle and you all are just being passionate. It's ridiculous to allow FB posts to come between you, IMO. Consider them passionate about something you don't want to engage them on and LEAVE IT AT THAT. You are still going to be family after the election is over and long after whomever is elected has come and gone from the office. That should mean something greater than trying to be right on Facebook. I agree. Step away from conflict right now and hope that you can repair the relationship once the dust settles, which may not be before January. We have tried to avoid politics in our family. Everyone who really knows us has a good idea where we stand, but since it's not the same as the rest of the family, we all avoid specific opinions. It is for the best. I have heard some shocking statements and read some on Facebook. Ignore and unfollow.
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Post by cindyupnorth on Nov 6, 2016 21:20:56 GMT
I would not unfriend or block them, as family, that could cause even more drama. I would just unfollow their posts til after the election. You can do that. Then when the election is over, refollow their posts. You can NOT change people's political minds. Esp those that already have them set, and posting stuff like that on FB. I have an aunt that is doing this same stuff. I started to unfollow all the links she posts. Which are usually from the same sites. shocker!! ha. After the election it will calm down. I don't think you should unfriend/unblock a relative you have been close to before, due to nasty politics now.
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Post by Woobster on Nov 6, 2016 21:23:41 GMT
I saw a very similar scenario play out on FB just recently between a high school friend of mine and his uncle. They jabbed back and forth at each other for a bit. Then the jabs started going below the belt. Then the name calling started. Then one unfriended the other.
I can only imagine how awkward family events will be in the future. All over a stupid election!
If you value your relationship with your aunt and uncle, I think it's best to just ignore this and move on. It's totally ok that you don't agree with them. It's even ok if you think their views are downright crazy. But... Is it worth damaging a relationship over?
If it is, then feel free to send them an e-mail explaining your feelings. Feel free to unfriend/block them, etc. I would probably unfollow them for the next few weeks until the election craziness settles down and then... Move on.
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peagia13
Full Member
Posts: 166
Sept 2, 2016 19:52:32 GMT
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Post by peagia13 on Nov 6, 2016 21:36:18 GMT
In the same way that they are not going to change your mind, you aren't going to change theirs.
So why engage?
Just say no.
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Nov 6, 2016 21:39:33 GMT
I already did unfollow them about a month ago. They came to a friends post to comment about mine.
I would love to continue to have the family relationship that we did before, but honestly, I see them differently now. They (and others in my family) have posted things that make me feel that they are not who I thought they were. I wouldn't have described them as racist, homophobic, xenophobic and sexist. But now I am not so sure. It isn't just that they are Trump followers, it is that they share and post the nastiest, untruthful things out there.
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Post by peasapie on Nov 6, 2016 21:50:30 GMT
I've been ignoring family members for months now on FB. There is no making sense with them and they become belligerent when confronted with the truth. I love my family, but several of them are irrational about this topic (and are conspiracy theorists about other things as well).
When I am tempted to reply, I remind myself that it will not change their minds. There is no amount of information you can provide that will change the opinion of someone whose mind is made up.
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suzastampin
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,587
Jun 28, 2014 14:32:59 GMT
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Post by suzastampin on Nov 6, 2016 21:58:31 GMT
Just walk away. It's not worth the aggravation. This has been a rough and long election period and there is just no changing the minds of whichever is the other side. I've only been glancing through my FB the last few days. I know which ones are going to spew meanness and nasty stuff and scroll right past them. I'm so done and over this election and am not going to let anybody get under my skin.
You don't want to permanently damage the relationship you have with them. So, scroll on by.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 2, 2024 16:10:27 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 6, 2016 21:59:17 GMT
I already did unfollow them about a month ago. They came to a friends post to comment about mine. Was your friends post public?
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Post by mom on Nov 6, 2016 22:00:28 GMT
Please just drop it all. There is no way that this will end well.
When you are on a merri-go round of drama, the best thing to do is just jump off and get away.
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River
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,508
Location: Alabama
Member is Online
Jun 26, 2014 15:26:04 GMT
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Post by River on Nov 6, 2016 22:03:36 GMT
I have many friends and dearly loved family that are complete opposites than me politically. That does not change the fact that I love them and under all other circumstances we get along great.
I don't understand letting politics come between me and them. After the election, most people go back to normal and are just as I've always known them to be.
If their post bothers you that much, then block their posts. If you see one on a friends page, roll your eyes and go on. If you can't handle someone having a different opinion than you (whether or not its factual) then go create you a bubble of only like minded people and be content and happy. If I choose to get worked up over it, then I find a like minded person to vent with. No reason to ruin an otherwise good friendship or especially good family relationships.
Personally, I chose to remember who the person is and how they've always been. Politics can bring out the worst in people and that includes ME as well.
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Nov 6, 2016 22:17:36 GMT
I already did unfollow them about a month ago. They came to a friends post to comment about mine. Was your friends post public? no idea, but they apparently saw that I commented on it. I don't know why people take it on themselves to do that?
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 2, 2024 16:10:27 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 6, 2016 22:21:42 GMT
Was your friends post public? no idea, but they apparently saw that I commented on it. I don't know why people take it on themselves to do that? If you don't unfriend them, I'd definitely put them on your Restricted list (in the Blocking section under settings) It should help with this kind of thing unless the post is public or unless your friends' settings allow friends of friends to see their posts.
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Post by refugeepea on Nov 6, 2016 22:28:00 GMT
Delete them as friends or stop posting to political posts so they don't see your feelings about this election anymore. I've only deleted 1 person and this was way before this whole election. It was ridiculous he focused on flag pins and being born in Kenya when it came to Obama. I would have had more respect for him if he talked about his *policies* that were bad.
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Post by redhead32 on Nov 6, 2016 22:30:11 GMT
I already did unfollow them about a month ago. They came to a friends post to comment about mine. I would love to continue to have the family relationship that we did before, but honestly, I see them differently now. They (and others in my family) have posted things that make me feel that they are not who I thought they were. I wouldn't have described them as racist, homophobic, xenophobic and sexist. But now I am not so sure. It isn't just that they are Trump followers, it is that they share and post the nastiest, untruthful things out there. I've had similar experiences with friends this election. I'm very logic based in how I approach life. I can't understand willfully and intentionally ignoring facts in favor of rhetoric. And like you, I'm not sure I can go back to seeing people in the same way I used to. :-(
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scrapngranny
Pearl Clutcher
Only slightly senile
Posts: 4,763
Jun 25, 2014 23:21:30 GMT
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Post by scrapngranny on Nov 6, 2016 22:35:09 GMT
Do not engage, it will accomplish nothing. Stay off Facebook for 48 hours.
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Post by christine58 on Nov 6, 2016 22:37:17 GMT
If you don't unfriend them, I'd definitely put them on your Restricted list (in the Blocking section under settings) It should help with this kind of thing unless the post is public or unless your friends' settings allow friends of friends to see their posts. What does putting them on Restricted do?? (just curious)
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flute4peace
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,757
Jul 3, 2014 14:38:35 GMT
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Post by flute4peace on Nov 6, 2016 22:40:01 GMT
It seems like this election has been the cause for so much of this sort of thing. Makes me so sad.
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