Al-Anon experiences or knowledge?

I don't, sorry! I needed one 2.5 yrs ago but we had slim pickings in our area. I have started going to Celebrate Recovery. Which may or may not be an option for you. It is a Christian based recovery program for "hang-ups, habits and hurts". I have only been going a month but it is wonderful being able to speak to others that have some of the same issues going on in their families like I have.

I'm not sure exactly what type of information you're looking for--the most basic, which is that it is modeled on the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, and is a program for those whose lives have been impacted by others' substance abuse. Or if you are looking for personal experiences?

My mother became involved with Al Anon following her divorce from her alcoholic second husband. We always had a difficult relationship but she really did a lot of work on herself within the Program and we were able to mend our relationship before she died. At the time of her death she was employed by Al Anon World Service Organization in Virginia Beach.

Al Anon is a support group based on the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. If you Google Al Anon you can find information online. Your second sentence is exactly right. You are there for yourself, not to change the substance abuser.

Again, on Al-Anon, no idea but here is what I do know. Having had an alcoholic grandfather and father, with the father finally getting sober until he died, there's a lot of baggage that comes with that. None were abusive. My dad was a very sweet, quiet drunk. But still a drunk. I then married a man who has been a wonderful father and husband but didn't know how to handle certain life situations and felt it was easier to handle them by drinking. A lot. Even on the job.  My kids and I went through a lot(no physical abuse just living with a drunk) but none of us ever talked about it to anyone. My DH did go into rehab 2.5 yrs ago and he got to talk things out. We still didn't. It is amazing what can get bottled up in a person and how it comes out differently between 4 people. Whether you are the drinker or the person attached to the drinker, it affects you. Sometimes you are not even aware of how it is affecting you.

I have not liked the person I have become. The way I have handled things. My sister in law said CR would be a very good place for me to go. There would be people to talk to, people who have been through what I have been through, things to learn on how to handle MY thoughts, MY actions. In the 4 weeks I have been, I would agree. I am not alone. The ONLY person in the world that has gone through this. I am a person of faith so this has worked for me. 

I would assume Al-Anon would be the same way. Like someone else said, they do say higher power. You use whatever higher power you believe in. You find people to lean on. If there is one in your area, it wouldn't hurt to go to one meeting. BUT I would give it more than one chance.

Perhaps my experience was a unique one - I'm in the South, so it was a little less "higher power" and a little more "Jesus Saves". In retrospect the phrase "handle an alcoholic" was probably too broad a description on my part, but I do distinctly remember what little advice they gave on how to avoid enabling an addict were all things I had already read. The experience didn't present me or my mother with anything that we weren't already doing and well aware of. That said, I come from a family of addicts, I can see how Al-anon might be useful for someone without any experience with the disease.

I found Al-Anon to be very helpful. That and seeing a family therapist really helped me learn to stop enabling the addict and to work on fixing MY life, not his.

I am not religious and ignored the Higher Power stuff. But I just attended meetings and did some reading. Did not even attempt to do the 12 steps.

I haven't attended a meeting in a long time now. It's too hard when I'm responsible for a 7yo who has activities during meeting time. But I wouldn't mind going at least occasionally.

I am so sorry! This was me exactly. Funny this is though, I am the child the alcoholic. Yes you do need someone to talk to. Like I said, this has been a good place for me. I hope you can find your spot!

Not me personally but my friend started going about a year ago because of her husband and it has helped her tremendously. It was a great place for her to let go and tell what's happening to her and for her to have people to understand exactly what she was going through and to help her sort it out and figure out her feelings.

I went in high school and found it very helpful to be able to talk openly with other kids, who didn't react with pity or disgust, because they were dealing with the same things in their parents I was dealing with in mine. There was no despair for us, there was actually a lot of laughter. I looked forward to feeling normal for a few hours a week. I did not go as an adult so I have no personal experience there but it was helpful at the time.

Thanks for this explanation.  I've been thinking that I need to attend these type of meetings for myself. I don't like who I am now in response to an alcoholic in my family that refuses to change. I need to feel better about myself and how I react.