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Post by smalltowngirlie on Nov 24, 2016 13:04:06 GMT
I belong to the local "Real Life in ..." site on Facebook. This was posted yesterday and not sure what I think about it.
(Moving to the area) looking for some free furniture. A couch in good condition maybe a love seat and some chairs to go with our kitchen table. Anything anyone is willing to donate to us would be a blessing. Thank you so much:)
I totally understand where people need help at times, and have no problem with people asking for help. There is just something about the way this phrased that bothers me. I keep thinking there is a better way to ask for things, this just has a "give me" vibe to it.
IDK, what are your thoughts.
BTW if we had aything extra we may have offered it to them.
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JustTricia
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,825 
Location: Indianapolis
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Post by JustTricia on Nov 24, 2016 13:06:23 GMT
I think it was phrased as nicely as possible by someone who is looking for free things. They were polite, they weren't specific (blue only, must be in like new condition, etc). How would you like it to have been phrased?
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Nov 24, 2016 13:12:01 GMT
I agree they asked nicely. There's really nothing wrong with putting the request out there. We had a couch we were going to sell, came across a similar request, and just gave it away as a result.
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Post by peasapie on Nov 24, 2016 13:13:29 GMT
I wish I had some furniture to give them. I feel great sympathy. I think it was worded very nicely.
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Post by mrsscrapdiva on Nov 24, 2016 13:13:52 GMT
I think it is worded fine. That is how most people would list something they are looking for on craigslist or freecycle.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Apr 29, 2024 9:04:40 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 24, 2016 13:14:51 GMT
Exactly. There really is no way to ask for free things without it sounding like you're asking for free things. You keep saying you have no problem with it while simultaneously having a problem with it!
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Post by destined2bmom on Nov 24, 2016 13:15:40 GMT
I read it and then reread it three times and agree with JustTricia; it sounds very polite and non-specific. I think she would appreciate anything that can be donated.
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Post by Bitchy Rich on Nov 24, 2016 13:21:52 GMT
I don't get what you're bothered by. I find it annoying when people ask for gift cards. But a used furniture request doesn't grate on my nerves.
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Post by smalltowngirlie on Nov 24, 2016 13:30:03 GMT
I think it is the word "free" and she just wants things handed to her. I guess I would have phrased it something like this:
"Moving to the area and things are really tight. We are in need of some furniture and will be checking out the local thrift stores, but if anyone has anything they want to get rid of for really cheap, free would be even better, please let us know. Thanks"
As I said, it has a "give me" vibe to it, like they are not willing to work for it, just want people to give them things. Not sure why I am reading it this way we get requests like this all the time at work.
As I said, if we had anything we would offer it to them, but we gave a lot away before we moved.
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Post by destined2bmom on Nov 24, 2016 13:44:45 GMT
I understand what you wrote; and I understand how you feel about the message. But maybe she is not thinking about how to word it; maybe she really needs it to be free. Also, maybe where she is moving from, people are more direct and to the point. Also depending on her age and education, how she worded it is fine in her eyes.
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Post by mikklynn on Nov 24, 2016 14:03:54 GMT
I am not bothered by it. Now, if she had said "It must be leather, preferably brown" I would think that was awful.
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gloryjoy
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,332
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Post by gloryjoy on Nov 24, 2016 14:06:45 GMT
Well I wish she lived in my area. I have a perfectly good couch and matching loveseat (in fabric) that I am trying to get rid of. Sat on maybe twice a year for the last 20 years.
Neither of my kids want it and I just want someone to come and get them before I move out of this house into a smaller house at the end of January.
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JustTricia
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,825
Location: Indianapolis
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Post by JustTricia on Nov 24, 2016 14:47:30 GMT
I think it is the word "free" and she just wants things handed to her. I guess I would have phrased it something like this: "Moving to the area and things are really tight. We are in need of some furniture and will be checking out the local thrift stores, but if anyone has anything they want to get rid of for really cheap, free would be even better, please let us know. Thanks"As I said, it has a "give me" vibe to it, like they are not willing to work for it, just want people to give them things. Not sure why I am reading it this way we get requests like this all the time at work. As I said, if we had anything we would offer it to them, but we gave a lot away before we moved. To me, the way you worded it sounds greedy. Like we can afford it, but if you have free that would be much better. Sounds much more like "give me". The original post really sounds like they are in need and are very appreciative if anyone could help. |
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Post by myshelly on Nov 24, 2016 15:18:37 GMT
The original post sounds better than what you wrote.
I think this is a super normal/often seen request on all local FB pages.
Not at all thread worthy, IMO.
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Peamac
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea # 418
Posts: 4,218
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Post by Peamac on Nov 24, 2016 15:51:45 GMT
I get what you're saying, OP. The requests I usually see on Facebook have a sentence or two about themselves personally, like "Our little family of four is starting over in a new area, and we could really use some furniture...." or "We'll be transitioning out of the military and back into civilian life and are in need of...." I think that helps to make the request sound a little more personable. Kind of like when I write a thank you note, I don't just write, "Thank you for the (gift). I really like it." I add a few more sentences about how I'll use it, or how thoughtful it was, or something like that so the note doesn't sound like a chore I'm doing b/c I have to. I really want to express my gratitude to them.
You could practically furnish an entire house for free with the stuff offered on Craigslist here where I live!
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Post by dulcemama on Nov 24, 2016 16:03:44 GMT
I understand what you're saying but I think she worded it very nicely. The way you worded it made me feel like you think she should apologize for being in need. Not saying you think that but that's the way it comes across to me.
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Mary Kay Lady
Pearl Clutcher
PeaNut 367,913 Refupea number 1,638
Posts: 3,073
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Post by Mary Kay Lady on Nov 24, 2016 16:05:55 GMT
I have to say that I agree with the other Peas on this one. It doesn't sound at all like it's posted by someone who feels entitled.
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Post by SockMonkey on Nov 24, 2016 16:11:27 GMT
Would you have preferred a sob story? If this person had said "We have been slammed with medical bills and can't afford to buy a lot of furniture," would you have considered it differently?
In my mind, that could be the case. Maybe they're cheap, but maybe they have a lot going on. You don't know their situation, and I don't think you're owed their story.
Donate or don't. When you give freely, you're not owed anything in return.
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Post by papersilly on Nov 24, 2016 16:12:58 GMT
I don't see anything wrong with the phrasing. It's not like they asked for a new giant screen tv or hot tub.
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Post by jtmom on Nov 24, 2016 16:14:24 GMT
I am not crazy about postings like these, I see it in a group I am in as well but you never really know someones circumstances. I figure if you have something to get rid of then offer it, you win as well because now that item is out of your house making space for a new one or just space  |
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Post by anniefb on Nov 24, 2016 16:39:59 GMT
I understand what you're saying, but I guess I don't have any issue with it - I thought it was worded in a good way. It's the sort of thing I see all the time on Freecycle and if I have something that's surplus to requirements, Im usually happy to give it away where it will be used.
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ellen
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,496
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Post by ellen on Nov 24, 2016 16:52:42 GMT
Over the years we have given away a lot of furniture because we just want to get rid of it. I don't have a problem with someone asking if anyone has furniture items to give away because a lot of people are glad to part with items. I don't feel there is a "give me" feel to this as much as a "Would you happen to have anything like this?" feel.
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Post by uksue on Nov 24, 2016 16:59:12 GMT
I wouldn't be offended by that phraseology . I frequently do get offended by entitled attitudes on my local freegle, but that one reads fine to me .
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Post by Zee on Nov 24, 2016 19:30:04 GMT
It is a request for anything free anyone can offer, so why should she state she's going to look at thrift stores or offer to pay? I'm going to assume she can't afford that.
She's not asking for specific stuff and doesn't sound greedy. I don't personally like the long sob stories.
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tincin
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,368
Jul 25, 2014 4:55:32 GMT
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Post by tincin on Nov 24, 2016 19:47:36 GMT
That's actually a really nice one. I've seen some really obnoxious requests for free stuff. Things like, "absolutely nothing plaid," "nothing with obvious wear," etc. those I thought were just plain rude.
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