Deleted
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May 16, 2024 18:23:36 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 2, 2016 0:38:56 GMT
Long story short, my DH just found out he is the sole executor of his parents estate. He has 3 sibs. The parent passed over a month ago, the other parent 9 years ago. The sibs have had time to find a probate attorney, look things over, get advice and possibly remove things from the home. They even had a meeting the other day, that the sib told him about.
He had been estranged from the parents due to their treatment of me and our child. Needless to say, he was shocked to find out he is the sole executor.
The one sib said that he just needs to call the attorney she contacted to have everything split 4 ways.
I say we need our own probate attorney, to make sure he isnt getting screwed over. He doesnt want to keep anything from the sibs, but we want to make sure they are not keeping anything from him.
Any advice?
Thank you
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Post by cadoodlebug on Dec 2, 2016 0:52:50 GMT
Is there a trust involved. Wills? You don't necessarily need an attorney. DH's step-mom passed away several months ago and his step sister is executor. She sent all the 6 children copies of the trust, will, etc. and has liquidated everything and will soon send everyone their 1/6th share of the estate.
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basketdiva
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by basketdiva on Dec 2, 2016 0:53:08 GMT
He should start by getting a copy of the will and get your own attorney. There is more involved than just splitting the assets. An executor has responsibilities as defined by each state. You can keep them in the loop but you do need to everything by the book so it doesn't come back to bite you in the butt down the road.
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Post by christine58 on Dec 2, 2016 0:55:01 GMT
He should have been given a copy of the will. They--siblings-cannot remove things from the house until the executor says so. I'd find my own lawyer
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Deleted
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May 16, 2024 18:23:36 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 2, 2016 0:55:53 GMT
Is there a will?
If there is, you usually go with the attorney that set it up.
It should not have taken them a month to contact your husband.
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Deleted
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May 16, 2024 18:23:36 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 2, 2016 0:58:33 GMT
Is there a trust involved. Wills? You don't necessarily need an attorney. DH's step-mom passed away several months ago and his step sister is executor. She sent all the 6 children copies of the trust, will, etc. and has liquidated everything and will soon send everyone their 1/6th share of the estate. Yes there are wills involved. |
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Post by calgaryscrapper on Dec 2, 2016 0:59:01 GMT
I would contact a lawyer asap. Does your dh have keys to the house? I hate to say this but I would go in and get pictures etc. Even consider moving things into storage. Who is the Executor? Having been through this with family members it can get ugly. If your dh is the sole executor I believe it is his responsibility to secure the house and probate the estate. I have heard of families fighting over items in the house then you can price each item for them to buy. Perhaps move things into storage. Especially if the house has to be sold.As an Executor I believe your dh will be entitled to some payment from the estate. He will also have to do a final income tax.mPlease do get what you can from the house and ask for the Will. I can't stress this enough to have your own attorney. If it gets ugly there could be a conflict. I am speaking from experience.
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Deleted
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May 16, 2024 18:23:36 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 2, 2016 1:05:46 GMT
Thank you all. Yes, he is the executor. The sister wants him to give power of attorney to her so she can handle things. The fact that it has taken her a month to contact my dh is a red flag to me.
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Post by cadoodlebug on Dec 2, 2016 1:22:50 GMT
Thank you all. Yes, he is the executor. The sister wants him to give power of attorney to her so she can handle things. The fact that it has taken her a month to contact my dh is a red flag to me. Oh hell no. The parent made him executor for a reason. It does sound like you need to contact an attorney. My mother-in-law's estate did not include a house to be sold. Good luck! |
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Post by calgaryscrapper on Dec 2, 2016 1:59:39 GMT
Do you live in the same city that fil lived in? I also would not anyone else handle this. Your dh's Dad must of had his own reasons to trust your dh. You say "there are wills involved". Is there a conflict? A lawyer would be able to advise you but I believe if you change the terms of the Will you need to go through the court system.
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samantha25
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by samantha25 on Dec 2, 2016 2:04:16 GMT
If he has been estranged for a long time, sometimes it is best to let it go. Do his legal obligation. You need to stay together as a family. It's ok to let others get their things. Does it really affect you and your family to have those things. In the end it's you and dh.....
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Post by txdancermom on Dec 2, 2016 3:18:33 GMT
He needs to find an attorney, have that attorney look at the will and file the matter for probate - and not give sister power of attorney to handle it. The will will say how the property and other assets should be divided
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Post by bc2ca on Dec 2, 2016 3:23:44 GMT
Long story short, my DH just found out he is the sole executor of his parents estate. He has 3 sibs. The parent passed over a month ago, the other parent 9 years ago. The sibs have had time to find a probate attorney, look things over, get advice and possibly remove things from the home. They even had a meeting the other day, that the sib told him about. He had been estranged from the parents due to their treatment of me and our child. Needless to say, he was shocked to find out he is the sole executor. The one sib said that he just needs to call the attorney she contacted to have everything split 4 ways. I say we need our own probate attorney, to make sure he isnt getting screwed over. He doesnt want to keep anything from the sibs, but we want to make sure they are not keeping anything from him. Any advice? Thank you I'm surprised the probate attorney did not contact your DH as the named executor and this makes me want to find someone else immediately. |
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Post by cadoodlebug on Dec 2, 2016 3:27:37 GMT
Long story short, my DH just found out he is the sole executor of his parents estate. He has 3 sibs. The parent passed over a month ago, the other parent 9 years ago. The sibs have had time to find a probate attorney, look things over, get advice and possibly remove things from the home. They even had a meeting the other day, that the sib told him about. He had been estranged from the parents due to their treatment of me and our child. Needless to say, he was shocked to find out he is the sole executor. The one sib said that he just needs to call the attorney she contacted to have everything split 4 ways. I say we need our own probate attorney, to make sure he isnt getting screwed over. He doesnt want to keep anything from the sibs, but we want to make sure they are not keeping anything from him. Any advice? Thank you I'm surprised the probate attorney did not contact your DH as the named executor and this makes me want to find someone else immediately.  And a month later at that! That really sounds shady to me. |
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Post by mom on Dec 2, 2016 3:31:35 GMT
Get your own attorney - and do not sign anything over to the sister. His parents wanted him to do it (for whatever reason).
Things already look shady because of how his siblings have acted. For your DH, he needs to do everything by the book.
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Post by Basket1lady on Dec 2, 2016 3:41:28 GMT
My mother predeceased my grandmother (her mother.) Because she was named in the will, her inheritance passed down and split between my brother and me. Let's just say that there were some grumblings about it all. My brother and I jointly hired an attorney to handle our part of the legalities. It was so much easier to just stay out of it all and to just refer any questions from my aunts to our lawyer. SO much easier.
With the information about the estrangement, and if your SIL wants to be the executor, I'd say let her. Hire a lawyer and discuss it with him/her, then sign it over to the sister. The peace of mind that your DH will gain will be worth it. Otherwise, I'd pretty much guarantee that e-v-e-r-y--l-i-t-t-l-e--t-h-i-n-g will be up for discussion and picked apart. Unless it's a huge estate, is it really worth that? Even then, is it worth it?
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Post by vpohlman on Dec 2, 2016 4:10:06 GMT
When my mom passed away, dad had already passed away, and they had named my sister and I both power of attorney and executors together. I legally signed off on it and my sister was the sole POA. When mom was in the nursing home, my sister took care of all things financial and medical. When mom passed, sister was immediately no longer POA. It took two days for the executor job to kick in. Our lawyer said you couldn't be POA after death. Not possible. So your SIL can't be POA even if she wants to. At least that's the way it works in my state. If I were you I'd get a new lawyer who knows what he's doing. Good luck!
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Post by snowsilver on Dec 2, 2016 5:46:28 GMT
My father died in June. I was his executor. Believe me, it can be a nightmare. There was a will, but he had purposely left 3 of his grandchildren out of it (he left small bequests to each of the others--there were legitimate reasons for the others not being named). I was horrified to learn that as executor I was required to send each of the unnamed grandchildren a copy of the will and inform them they were not named. It was not a huge estate believe me and I was quite shocked to find how much work I had to do to settle it. There are forms that have to be filled out precisely and they are not simple (at least not in NY state). There is a LOT of work to it. I did have a lawyer help me with it (he turned out to be an absolute sweetheart and never sent me a bill--just called it friendly advice) but I don't know what I would have done without him.
NO ONE has a right to take ONE SINGLE THING from that house until the estate is settled. Now if all of you are in agreement about certain items, I suppose the courts would never know if things were removed. But it sounds to me like there could be some argument about it, so absolutely no one should be in the house (except the executor) and not one thing should be distributed until your husband has been named by the surrogate court.
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Deleted
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May 16, 2024 18:23:36 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 2, 2016 18:33:25 GMT
He has retained a different lawyer. His first step is going to request a copy of the will so dh's attorney can look it over. Thank you for all the informaton.
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And a month later at that! That really sounds shady to me. 
