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Post by librarylady on Mar 31, 2017 20:26:36 GMT
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Post by 950nancy on Mar 31, 2017 21:12:06 GMT
I have to agree with most of the points she made. In-laws, kitchens, etc. I like her definition of a vacation: tropical, all-inclusive, kid activities. That is what I consider a vacation. We go on one every year. I told my husband if there is a kitchen, it isn't a vacation for me.
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Post by ktdoesntscrap on Mar 31, 2017 21:17:54 GMT
Years ago a friend told me a trip is what you take with your kids... a Vacation is what you do without them!  |
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Post by 950nancy on Mar 31, 2017 21:21:52 GMT
Years ago a friend told me a trip is what you take with your kids... a Vacation is what you do without them! My husband and I took our first trip without our kids in December. Our oldest is 22. It felt really weird for about an hour. Thankfully our kids have been great travelers and they are really fun to be around. We do all inclusive and the kids have been more than happy to entertain themselves in the pool, restaurants, and other public places. We also have two rooms, so adult time is always possible. |
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Post by crazy4scraps on Mar 31, 2017 21:41:17 GMT
Ha ha ha! Isn't this the truth? My adult niece and I have kids the same age, and we've often joked that going to Target alone without kid/s or husband is more of a vacation than taking an actual vacation trip with said kid/s and husband! Now I have to add that whether it is a trip or a vacation also depends on who you are in the relationship. In my family, the three of us can all go to the same place at the same time and it's different for each person. For DD, anything away from school and home= vacation. For DH, anything away from work and home= vacation. For me, it has to be anything away from home, work, pets and family to qualify otherwise I will inevitably end up getting stuck doing some or all of the drudgery crap I get stuck doing at home all the time which definitely does NOT = vacation!  Case in point, when we went to WDW a couple years ago we stayed at a friend's timeshare on property. Which, while totally awesome for a family getaway, meant that I still had to cook, shop for groceries, do dishes and clean up, take care of a sick kid and do laundry. Sorry, even though I loved going, that does NOT qualify as a vacation to me.  |
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scrappinwithoutpeas
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,914 
Location: Northern Virginia
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Post by scrappinwithoutpeas on Mar 31, 2017 21:59:49 GMT
Too funny! I laughed so much DH came downstairs to find out what was going on. And then I read, like, 5 more posts on her blog...HOW have I never been aware of this blog before??? |
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carhoch
Pearl Clutcher
Be yourself everybody else is already taken
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Post by carhoch on Mar 31, 2017 22:09:32 GMT
this is awesome and so true
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AmandaA
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Posts: 3,502
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Post by AmandaA on Apr 1, 2017 1:30:45 GMT
This is why my husband got on a plane with two kids to visit his parents over spring break and I stayed home!!! We did a two week trip over Christmas and the memories are all still too vivid to repeat. So I am happily sitting here in a cold, rainy Indiana only doing 1/4 of my usual duties. It feels much more like a vacation than going on their trip! And spending quality time with their dad and his family is good for them, right?!
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Post by 950nancy on Apr 1, 2017 2:48:57 GMT
This is why my husband got on a plane with two kids to visit his parents over spring break and I stayed home!!! We did a two week trip over Christmas and the memories are all still too vivid to repeat. So I am happily sitting here in a cold, rainy Indiana only doing 1/4 of my usual duties. It feels much more like a vacation than going on their trip! And spending quality time with their dad and his family is good for them, right?! Yes, yes it is. I love it when my husband takes the boys to see family. LOVE IT. I do what I want and someone has to stay home and take care of the dogs. I still see them too, just not as often as I could. My husband took our (at the time) 3 month old baby to a family reunion 12 hours away because I had a two week class. I learned very early on that my husband was just as capable as I was at taking care of a baby. And let's be honest. That baby was probably passed around from relative to relative that weekend. Everyone survived. |
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Post by maryland on Apr 1, 2017 2:55:01 GMT
Visiting family is a trip, the beach is a vacation. If we are going somewhere just us and the kids and staying in a condo or hotel, that is a vacation. We are visiting a college 9 hrs. away (Go Univ. of SC) and because it is SC, it's a vacation. Because I am excited!  But others would call it a trip! |
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Post by beanbuddymom on Apr 2, 2017 14:09:37 GMT
By that definition sadly I have never been on vacation since 1999 (honeymoon). WOW.
Love the blog though, thanks for the link, that was funny and I am taking a moment to check out her other blog posts, she's funny!
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Post by freecharlie on Apr 2, 2017 15:04:23 GMT
I disagree with almost everything she said. I do think there is a different between a trip and a vacation, but not what she said.
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milocat
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,437
Location: 55 degrees north in Alberta, Canada
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Post by milocat on Apr 2, 2017 16:06:02 GMT
Interesting and funny I see her points and could agree with some of them. But I take holidays. That's what everyone says here not vacation.
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PrettyInPeank
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,691
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Post by PrettyInPeank on Apr 2, 2017 16:09:55 GMT
Sooooo funny and so true!
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quiltz
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Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
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Post by quiltz on Apr 2, 2017 19:45:13 GMT
This is why my husband got on a plane with two kids to visit his parents over spring break and I stayed home!!! We did a two week trip over Christmas and the memories are all still too vivid to repeat. So I am happily sitting here in a cold, rainy Indiana only doing 1/4 of my usual duties. It feels much more like a vacation than going on their trip! And spending quality time with their dad and his family is good for them, right?! My xh loved to go camping. I hated it (didn't grow up with ever camping). When he would go for a week with the kids at our church's annual one week camping place, I had the most enjoyable time at home. My boss would joke that I was having a 'trip around the world' while they were gone as one night I would order Chinese, another Greek food, another Italian, and so on. We had an out-door pool and I would spend the late afternoons and evenings with a glass of wine with my food, going for a quick swim -- so relaxing. I really went out of my way before they left for the week by preparing food for them, flash freezing food, making up a menu for the week and putting in treats for them. They had fun with their kids, the meals were all prepared for them. I even went to the grocery store that would seal the lunch meat into vac seals for individual sandwiches, so that the lunch meat (turkey, ham, summer sausage etc.) wouldn't go bad during their week away. Usually the kids might bring along a friend so that made it easier for xh, as he really never supervised anything. Plus he would bring the boat so water skiing, tube riding and other water sports would fill their day. After a couple of years, my friends who had this week as their only 'family vacation/trip/holiday' came to realize that I did get the better end of the deal. A bit more work ahead, but a week to myself - priceless. |
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Post by 950nancy on Apr 2, 2017 21:05:02 GMT
This is why my husband got on a plane with two kids to visit his parents over spring break and I stayed home!!! We did a two week trip over Christmas and the memories are all still too vivid to repeat. So I am happily sitting here in a cold, rainy Indiana only doing 1/4 of my usual duties. It feels much more like a vacation than going on their trip! And spending quality time with their dad and his family is good for them, right?! My xh loved to go camping. I hated it (didn't grow up with ever camping). When he would go for a week with the kids at our church's annual one week camping place, I had the most enjoyable time at home. My boss would joke that I was having a 'trip around the world' while they were gone as one night I would order Chinese, another Greek food, another Italian, and so on. We had an out-door pool and I would spend the late afternoons and evenings with a glass of wine with my food, going for a quick swim -- so relaxing. I really went out of my way before they left for the week by preparing food for them, flash freezing food, making up a menu for the week and putting in treats for them. They had fun with their kids, the meals were all prepared for them. I even went to the grocery store that would seal the lunch meat into vac seals for individual sandwiches, so that the lunch meat (turkey, ham, summer sausage etc.) wouldn't go bad during their week away. Usually the kids might bring along a friend so that made it easier for xh, as he really never supervised anything. Plus he would bring the boat so water skiing, tube riding and other water sports would fill their day. After a couple of years, my friends who had this week as their only 'family vacation/trip/holiday' came to realize that I did get the better end of the deal. A bit more work ahead, but a week to myself - priceless. My friend does this for her family before she leaves on a trip or vacation. She cooks every meal ahead of time. I just can't do it. I was of the 'you'll survive without me" thought process. |
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Post by Restless Spirit on Apr 2, 2017 21:11:37 GMT
Thanks for sharing. That's was very funny and very true.
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Post by shamrock on Apr 2, 2017 21:48:40 GMT
Years ago a friend told me a trip is what you take with your kids... a Vacation is what you do without them! That's what my DH says! |
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perumbula
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,439
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Post by perumbula on Apr 2, 2017 22:47:36 GMT
My xh loved to go camping. I hated it (didn't grow up with ever camping). When he would go for a week with the kids at our church's annual one week camping place, I had the most enjoyable time at home. My boss would joke that I was having a 'trip around the world' while they were gone as one night I would order Chinese, another Greek food, another Italian, and so on. We had an out-door pool and I would spend the late afternoons and evenings with a glass of wine with my food, going for a quick swim -- so relaxing. I really went out of my way before they left for the week by preparing food for them, flash freezing food, making up a menu for the week and putting in treats for them. They had fun with their kids, the meals were all prepared for them. I even went to the grocery store that would seal the lunch meat into vac seals for individual sandwiches, so that the lunch meat (turkey, ham, summer sausage etc.) wouldn't go bad during their week away. Usually the kids might bring along a friend so that made it easier for xh, as he really never supervised anything. Plus he would bring the boat so water skiing, tube riding and other water sports would fill their day. After a couple of years, my friends who had this week as their only 'family vacation/trip/holiday' came to realize that I did get the better end of the deal. A bit more work ahead, but a week to myself - priceless. My friend does this for her family before she leaves on a trip or vacation. She cooks every meal ahead of time. I just can't do it. I was of the 'you'll survive without me" thought process. I had the "you'll survive" mentality with my kids when dh and I went on our vacation. I made them tell me what they wanted to cook for each other and then bought the groceries. It worked just fine. They didn't starve. DH and I went on vacation even though there was a kitchen, we did laundry, and no one brought me drinks in a lounge chair. We went without the kids and when we had dinner to make or laundry to do we did it together. We got to do only what we wanted and didn't have to cater to any kids. It was lovely. I do agree with her in spirit. It's the reason we don't go camping. I would have to do every single thing I usually do but in primitive conditions. |
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Post by brookeq on Apr 3, 2017 1:30:08 GMT
Preach!!! My husband and I just had a long talk (well argument) about vacations. Most of our vacations are not a vacation for me. I still do the same things I do at home. Cook, clean, laundry, feed the kids, put them to bed, etc. I make sure everyone gets to do things they want/enjoy. Because lets face it us moms aren't happy if everyone else isn't. If my husband doesn't golf enough he is miserable the whole time. So I try to make time for that. Which means I am watching kids by myself while he is gone for hours. That favor is not often reciprocated. I still make sure I get to do things I want but it always has to be a struggle. And honestly an hour to myself is not a vacation. I am trying to get him to realize that just because he works full time (I dont') the family vacation (well trip ) is not all about him. I also just told him that visiting his family across the country is not a vacation for me. And it does not count as a vacation (meaning that if we visit his family I still want a family vacation that year). I don't want to stay at anyone elses house, but esp not the in laws. It is not fun for me. It is stressful. Because he doesn't see his family often it is all about him. So of course he goes golfing almost EVERY day. THat is hours he is away and I am stuck at their house. If i try to suggest something else and maybe something to do with me the family gets mad and calls me selfish. I have no say in what we do, where we eat, etc. Not fun. I watch the kids all day, cook for them because MIL won't, do the laundry and just can't relax at all. So I have sent my husband on mini trips with out us. He can do what he wants those trips. If/when we all come out next time he needs to be better and do things with us to every now and then. My favorite almost trips/vacations are: cruises -- still some work but kids clubs are my best friend. And food that i don't have to cook...yes please. beach house -- every so many years we rent a huge beach house on the outer banks with 3-4 other families(these are friends not our own family) . We have our own pool and are beach front. Basically there always adults somewhere (at the pool, at the beach, inside) so the kids have a little more freedom to do what they want. I hate when you have to pack up and leave the beach because someone needs to use the bathroom, Or my kid likes the pool, but I love the ocean. Problem solved on these trips. There still is cooking to be done but we take turns. and laundry i can deal with. kidless trip to hawaii -- enough said. |
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Grom Pea
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,944
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Post by Grom Pea on Apr 3, 2017 1:57:38 GMT
Lol this was hilarious. Dh's parents keep inviting us to their timeshare in the Caymans where they each take turns cooking, no thank you, been there once and it was not for me. If I'm cooking it's not a vacation, Even if it's only once but for 15 people. Personally I love visiting my family, they always take us out or cook or we eat leftovers from going out but I'm not responsible for cooking or dishes. Dh hates it because he feels out of place but it's like a vacation to me :-)
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Post by lesserknownpea on Apr 3, 2017 2:31:52 GMT
Years ago, XH, I, our 4 teen and preteen kids took my in laws to the coast for a week. XH had a job there, and figured we'd take this opportunity to take his parents to the beach.
His father was becoming paralyzed by ALS. He was on a vent, and breathing tube. He required 24 hr intensive caregiving. XH, me, DS17, and XMIL were all able to care for him, but I was his main caregiver.
We had to pack up tons of medical gear and machines. Including portable vent and suction machine as well as the full size ones. I had to make sure we packed all the meds, gloves, suction tubes, spare trach tube, his food, wheelchair,anything I could imagine we might need while 2 hours away from our homes.
XH left for the coast before me in his work truck with my sons. So I had to load up our patient and all the stuff and drive. I had to pull over to the side of the road and give him suction with the portable machine twice.
Then we had to unload and set up at the rental house. We moved furniture around so XFIL could look out the window at the ocean. We felt this would be the last time he got to see it.
XH and boys spent every day working. So guess who got to take care of in laws, including all that suction, g tube feeding, potty duty, meds, and a million little thing trying to keep the patient comfortable. Plus cook, do laundry, deal with two DDs.
When it was over, yep, pack it all up in the van and load up our patient. Drive back and unload everything.
It was so exhausting.
A week or so later I ran into one of my in laws friends and he asked how my vacation was. I just stared at him. I honestly didn't realize he was referring to that trip.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Apr 3, 2017 3:39:06 GMT
brookeq DH and I solve the problem by taking separate vacations sometimes. We've done that since the beginning, long before we had our kid. He has gone on fishing trips, hunting trips, snowmobile or ATV trips all with his buddies. I've gone to scrapbook retreats, rubber stamp conventions, tons of long weekend road trips with my BFFs. It really doesn't matter where we go or what we do, if we're getting away from the daily grind it's all good. I think as women we really NEED that time away to recharge ourselves, bond with our friends, laugh, laugh some more and yes, even b!tch a little bit! I'm sure the guys have their own version of that and I don't have any problem with it. Since your DH is managing to get in all of that golfing time while leaving you stuck with the kids anyway, I would happily send him off *on his own* for some of those trips with the caveat that YOU will ALSO get some time away *by yourself* with YOUR friends at another time. And then DO it. Turnabout is fair play! My DH is really very good about picking up the slack with the kid and the pets when I want to take off with friends. And TBH, when he goes off on one of his friend trips, it's kind of nice because I'm at home with my DD and we can kind of do things our own way! I let her sleep in my bed, we eat junky fast food or have waffles for dinner, we go roller skating or craft store shopping or out to a movie, or we bake treats together that we otherwise wouldn't if he was home. Sometimes I invite my BFFs to come over for a crafting day or weekend at our house. Even though I'm at home and still have many of the responsibilities of being at home, I'm also not feeling TRAPPED because I have my car, my familiar places to go, the internet to entertain my DD sometimes (and myself!), friends are around and plenty of creature comforts right here that I wouldn't have if I was stuck with my kid somewhere else. Just something to seriously consider, it really helps with the inevitable feelings of resentment and unfairness when one person always seems to get to do what they want and the other person doesn't. ETA: I see you said you sometimes do send him off on his own, now you need to do the same thing for YOU!
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Apr 3, 2017 10:21:36 GMT
That was hilarious!
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Apr 3, 2017 10:33:48 GMT
By that definition sadly I have never been on vacation I end that statement with a period. I've never been on a vacation at all. Trips with kids? Yes. Laundry, cooking, etc? Yes. |
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Post by brina on Apr 3, 2017 11:51:42 GMT
Years ago a friend told me a trip is what you take with your kids... a Vacation is what you do without them! This is what we have always said in our family. I think it started with my fil. |
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Post by ScrapsontheRocks on Apr 3, 2017 13:30:14 GMT
I read the comments on the post- as a non- kids couple my DH and I have had a few vacations, but looking back, we have had far more "oblications", most of them involving International travel. We hope to change that very soon. TFS, OP!
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Post by Tammiem2pnc1 on Apr 3, 2017 13:40:23 GMT
I guess I'm a little different. I couldn't imagine being on a "trip" without my kids. I love spending time with them and there will come a time when they are grown and out of the house, plenty of time for the "vacations" then. We do rent a condo on the beach with a kitchen. And our version of cooking is lunch meat sandwiches or grilling up a couple of hot dogs. No 3 course meals going on and nothing but paper plate, bowls and plastic spoons. No dishes to wash. We spent many years going on vacation with DH's family. And while I loved my MIL, it was all out cooking and cleaning while we were on a trip. The topper of it all was when she would buy plastic disposable plates and utensils that all needed hand washing, they were not to be thrown away. I somehow always got volunteered for kitchen clean up duty and would spend hours washing all that crap. Why we weren't allowed to use the plates and utensils that were supplied at the rental I will never understand. Just pop those suckers in the dishwasher and it would be done in minutes. We had to have full course meals for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The last trip we took with her I was pregnant with YDS and was sick the entire trip. She actually would get mad at me for only having a small bowl of cereal instead of bacon, sausage, eggs and biscuits. I'm not a big breakfast eater in general and this was even worse. Going on a trip with them was nothing but work. I miss her terribly, but I don't miss those times. After she passed away she left money in her will for us all to go to Disney. While I was happy to be there, my SIL turned out to be just like her mother. We cooked and cleaned and did laundry every day, I would have rather stayed at home. Now that we do family vacations with just my DH and the boys, it's nothing but fun and relaxation.
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Post by Darcy Collins on Apr 3, 2017 13:57:24 GMT
There's a lot of truth in the post - and I share the disdain for camping. But I love having a kitchen. I actually don't enjoy eating out for breakfast every day - once in a while sure, but if we're staying some where for a week or more, I'd much rather have a kitchen and buy some bagels, yogurt, cereal, etc so we can sleep in and eat when we want. I rarely use it to make dinner - as I really like going out to eat dinner. Everyone cleans up for themselves - so it's no biggie and well worth not having to drag everyone out when the first person gets hungry.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Apr 3, 2017 14:41:09 GMT
Oblications! Ha ha! I've been on a few of those too. I went on one dream vacation with my mom when she was about 75 (it was my sister that caused all the drama on that one), but DH and I went on several oblications with MIL in her senior years. Not even remotely fun. As in, sleeping in the same room with my DH and her with EVERY light in the room on because she was afraid she wouldn't find the bathroom in the dark, ugh. She's gone now but I don't miss that at all. |
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But others would call it a trip!
