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Post by elaine on Sept 10, 2014 23:51:03 GMT
One of the many things about the Ray Rice thing I can't get beyond is the clearer video they have released showing him spitting on Janay in the hallway (also reported by a hotel worker) and then again in the elevator.
Who spits on someone they are in a relationship with?
I can only imagine spitting on a mortal enemy, someone I hated with every fiber of my being. For example, someone who hurt my boys.
Otherwise, I could never do it. There is something so primally disgusting about it that I can't even put into words. It seems so linked with wanting to humiliate the other person for me - akin to urinating on someone.
Is there another way to look at? I've thankfully never had to give it much thought before. Have you ever spit on someone? Known someone who is a spitter?
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Post by rumplesnat on Sept 10, 2014 23:56:06 GMT
My ex spit at my face, but luckily I closed the door before I got hit with it. My first knee jerk reaction to someone actually spitting on me would be a punch in the face in all honesty. It's foul.
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Post by 5peanutsnana on Sept 10, 2014 23:59:54 GMT
I'm going to go out on a limb and say she was under the influence of something. When they are in that state, they do many things they would not do normally, or so I hear. No. I have never spit in anyone's face.
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Post by SabrinaM on Sept 11, 2014 0:00:25 GMT
Nasty.
I was at a stoplight yesterday when a lady in the car in front of me rolled her window down and spit out the window. Nauseating.
My Mom is an RN. She said she gets patients (women) who bring cups to spit in. She said she's seen them spit on the floor before so a cup is preferable. LOL
As far as spitting ON someone? No.
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J u l e e
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Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
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Post by J u l e e on Sept 11, 2014 0:02:57 GMT
I doesn't even occur to me as a gesture. Ever. I'm trying to imagine a scenario where I might spit on someone, and I can't even come up with one. I'm sure I'd flip out in some manner if someone was hurting my daughter, but even then, I don't think I'd spit on a person.
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Post by heather on Sept 11, 2014 0:03:20 GMT
Not to make light of the situation, but I don't think I could physically spit on someone. It would just dribble down my chin.
It's really disturbing to see the blame Janay is getting from this. If I was spit on multiple times, I'm not sure what my reaction would be. I keep going back to...if he does this in public, what does he do in private?
I hope this case brings a change in the culture of the NFL. I would love to watch games again, but haven't in years because the NFL's (and NCAA) treatment of women disgusts me.
But I do enjoy shopping and going to movies on Super Bowl Sunday. Everything is deserted and I have the places to myself.
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Post by elaine on Sept 11, 2014 0:10:41 GMT
Nasty. I was at a stoplight yesterday when a lady in the car in front of me rolled her window down and spit out the window. Nauseating. My Mom is an RN. She said she gets patients (women) who bring cups to spit in. She said she's seen them spit on the floor before so a cup is preferable. LOL As far as spitting ON someone? No. I get nauseated when people do that - the rolling down the car window or opening the door and spitting on the ground. I understand and that some illnesses and medications can cause people to have an excess of saliva or difficulty swallowing and therefore spit. I try to tell myself that must be why people spit out of their cars, just to help with my nausea at watching it. But, I'm guessing that isn't always the case. I just can't fathom spitting on the person I planned to marry. |
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Post by christine58 on Sept 11, 2014 0:12:42 GMT
He's an asshole that's why he spit on someone he loves...
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Post by elaine on Sept 11, 2014 0:13:01 GMT
I'm going to go out on a limb and say she was under the influence of something. When they are in that state, they do many things they would not do normally, or so I hear. No. I have never spit in anyone's face. She didn't spit on him, Ray Rice spit on her. Not once, but twice! Ray Rice who was such a supposed "model citizen" as a member of the Baltimore Ravens community. Who does that? |
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Post by cadoodlebug on Sept 11, 2014 0:13:23 GMT
Elaine, I completely agree. I have never spit on anyone and can't recall anyone ever spitting on me. When I see someone spit in someone's face on TV or in a movie, I recoil. It is so offensive and disgusting.
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Post by PinkPrincess77 on Sept 11, 2014 0:15:23 GMT
I'm so confused because I've seen NUMEROUS reports where she spit on him either first, or as well. Either way, it's disgusting. I can't even stand it when someone spits on the ground. Either way, they both behaved badly, but she did NOT deserve to get hit like she did.
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Post by gmcwife1 on Sept 11, 2014 0:16:26 GMT
My mom spit on my dad at least once.
No I couldn't/wouldn't spit on someone. But I guess I do know at least one person that has.
I also heard early on that she spit on him and now it's being said that he spit on her.
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Post by Anna*Banana on Sept 11, 2014 0:19:35 GMT
No and no. They both have such serious issues and need much counseling. I doubt they'll ever be able to have a healthy marriage. |
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Post by elaine on Sept 11, 2014 0:22:49 GMT
I'm so confused because I've seen NUMEROUS reports where she spit on him either first, or as well. Either way, it's disgusting. I can't even stand it when someone spits on the ground. Either way, they both behaved badly, but she did NOT deserve to get hit like she did. I'll look for the links to the clearer video that was released this afternoon. Not jumpy like what we had been seeing. It is clear that he spits on her in the hallway and she waves a hand in his face in response (doesn't make contact). Then in the elevator, he comes over and spits on her again, and it is response to that that she goes toward him to retaliate but he then punches her into the side of the elevator and knocks her out. I wonder if she even knew what happened in the elevator until she saw the video. It is common when sustaining head trauma bad enough to lead to unconsciousness to have memory loss of the events of several minutes before the trauma. Since Ray was telling people she was drunk and passed out on her own, maybe that is what she believed and why she initially apologized. Eta: I can't find the video I've seen on ESPN, but Here is a link to the longer video that is also a little clearer than the previous one. |
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Post by annabella on Sept 11, 2014 0:34:40 GMT
I think spitting is so low and vile. I honestly think it's better to slap someone than spit. Spitting is just so offensive.
My male co-worker had a long debate about this on facebook and it turns out that one of his fb friends went to high school with Ray and was sticking up for him saying we don't know the whole story. Here's my theory, Janey was drunk (as evident by her not walking straight) and mad at him and instigated the fight, thus she feels she should take the blame. However I think the Jay-Z/ Solange video should be thrown into the discussion here because it was the exact same scenario and look at how Jay-Z handled himself when she lunged at him. You don't have to hit a woman back? No matter how drunk you are, a man should still have that restraint unless it was in his nature to begin with.
I think the fact that they had a kid out of wedlock plays into this as well. She was so happy that he finally wanted to marry her (after the incident) that she could forget the incident because he finally legitimized their relationship and proved his love to her with that ring. Hopefully she didn't sign a pre-nup. I watched Basketball Wives a few years back and a lot of those black women walked away from their marriages with nothing because they signed prenups. If you look at all the black athletes that have multiple kids with the same woman but still won't marry them (LeBron James), it says a lot about our society, why aren't black men getting married. I actually read an interesting book on this called "Is Marriage Only for White People" because statistically black women have a high rate of being single.
Evelyn Lozada said she wouldn't have left Ochocinco if his headbutting wasn't public. It was the public shaming that forced her to leave. I'd say again because she was in her late 30s and was happy someone finally married her.
Tamron Hall (a 43 year old single black woman) said the same thing on Today show and I think it's because her sister was a victim of domestic violence so I guess she can see the other side. I think the public is lashing out at Janay in a way to shame her to leave.
I remember when the Rihanna/Chris Brown incident happened, Rihanna's friends came out and said that she used to hit him all the time, that was their thing. So why does she get to go on with her career but Chris is still carrying baggage from it? I'm not saying it's right, just an observation.
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Post by annabella on Sept 11, 2014 0:35:40 GMT
Good point!
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Deleted
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May 10, 2024 0:48:40 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Sept 11, 2014 0:54:44 GMT
I guarandamntee you that wasn't the first or last time he engaged in that behavior. She didn't even seem shocked in the hallway, just raised her hand and kept walking. I would have been stunned and had a major wtf did you just do response.
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Deleted
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May 10, 2024 0:48:40 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Sept 11, 2014 1:22:49 GMT
Probably the same kind of person who beats the woman he's supposed to spend his life with to the point that she's unconscious..
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freebird
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Post by freebird on Sept 11, 2014 1:48:58 GMT
I'm pretty sure I'd lose my shit and lay someone out that spit on me. I'd probably lose my damn mind.
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Post by DinCA on Sept 11, 2014 1:54:25 GMT
Probably the same kind of person who beats the woman he's supposed to spend his life with to the point that she's unconscious..  And I'll add the same person who stands there for over three minutes and NEVER checks to see if she's ok or needs medical assistance. He's more concerned about her damn shoes than he is about her. |
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grammanisi
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Post by grammanisi on Sept 11, 2014 2:04:21 GMT
This and the fact that I doubt he loves her.
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Post by eebud on Sept 11, 2014 2:19:31 GMT
And I'll add the same person who stands there for over three minutes and NEVER checks to see if she's ok or needs medical assistance. He's more concerned about her damn shoes than he is about her. I don't get that either..........the standing around and not helping her. It wasn't just Ray Rice either. I think I saw at least 4 people around her before the 5th person came in to actually try to help her up. I believe at least one, the first one, was hotel security based on a report that I read. Spitting on another person is just vile. I can't imagine doing that to anyone on purpose. Heck, I am embarrassed if I accidentally have a bit of spit in the direction of someone I am talking to. |
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Post by papersilly on Sept 11, 2014 3:26:45 GMT
She was so happy that he finally wanted to marry her (after the incident) that she could forget the incident because he finally legitimized their relationship and proved his love to her with that ring.
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He married her the day after he was indicted. I believe he did it so, as his wife, she didnt have to testify against him if his case went to trial. Spousal privelege. I dont believe it had anything to do with legitimizing their love. He was just covering his ass.
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Nink
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Post by Nink on Sept 11, 2014 3:36:53 GMT
No and no. They both have such serious issues and need much counseling. I doubt they'll ever be able to have a healthy marriage. Didn't you read her memo? They're going to show the world what real love is. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
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Post by 5peanutsnana on Sept 11, 2014 3:48:45 GMT
ATLANTIC CITY, N.J. (CBSNewYork/AP) — Ray Rice and Janay Palmer can be heard shouting obscenities at each other, and she appears to spit in the face of the three-time Pro Bowl running back right before he throws a brutal punch in a video shown to The Associated Press by a law enforcement official.
The video, shown to the AP Monday night, includes audio and is longer than the grainy TMZ Sports video released earlier that day. After the TMZ video made its way around the Internet, the Baltimore Ravens cut Rice and the league suspended him indefinitely. Rice was originally suspended for two games and coaches and others had praised his behavior since the arrest for striking his then-fiancee in February.
Apparently they were involved in a spitting match. It's so sad no matter which way you look at it. She is undoubtedly brainwashed.
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Post by winogirl on Sept 11, 2014 3:51:32 GMT
Spitting is so disrespectful. I'll be married 30 years next year and we don't fight often, but sometimes it happens. He's said nasty things that he didn't mean in the heat of the moment and he has pushed me but with not full force. And I've said nasty things too and thrown a glass of wine at him (I was REALLY mad to waste a glass of wine!)
But we've never spit on each other. Never.
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Post by gardengoddess on Sept 11, 2014 4:35:22 GMT
They are both nasty people.
But just for a bit of humor....didn't the Greek family in "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" spit on each other as a blessing of good luck?
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conchita
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Post by conchita on Sept 11, 2014 4:37:57 GMT
Nope, never spit on anyone or been spitting mad, as the saying goes. The worst my husband has ever done to me was do a Dutch oven early on in our marriage. That only happened one time. The worst thing he ever said to me was that I was acting like a little girl. I didn't spit on him, hit him or call him any names back but he certainly didn't get a home cooked meal for about a week.
So I have been very fortunate to not experience that kind of toxic relationship in my personal life. I have learned valuable lessons from my grandmother, aunts, cousins who had and are still in toxic relationships. It makes me sad for them and the children who get caught in the middle. Hopefully there are women out there right now who see themselves in Janay and are finding the strength to break free.
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anniebygaslight
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Post by anniebygaslight on Sept 11, 2014 6:20:58 GMT
He is a vile specimen, and she is a fool. When his money runs out, perhaps she will come to her senses. If he hasn't beaten them out of her.
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And I'll add the same person who stands there for over three minutes and NEVER checks to see if she's ok or needs medical assistance. He's more concerned about her damn shoes than he is about her.
