AnotherPea
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Post by AnotherPea on Sept 8, 2018 18:58:10 GMT
Let's vote on two situations I witnessed this week.
Situation one - kids at a splash park. About ten kids total, four that are barely walkers or crawlers. Two are 2/3 years old. Three are about 5. One that's about 9, the older brother of a girl that's 5ish. The splash pad has fountains, bubbly areas and the large stationary water guns like theme parks have at the bottom of flume rides. 2-5 year olds are running around, squealing, having a great time. Sometimes they grab for a gun and squirt each other. Babies are sitting, splashing with the bubblers and crawling/toddling towards each other. Babies' mothers are nearby, some in street clothes, managing to tend to their kids without getting under the fountains. Nine year old gets to a gun, pumps it up so the water streams a long distance, and targets the mothers in street clothes. Doesn't wet the kids running around or the mothers in bathing suits. His sister fights him a bit to play with the gun and his mother tells him to share. He walks away and goes to a fountain where the other babies are. Babies are sitting under a low-flow fountain, playing with the water as it comes down. Kid puts his hand under the water, blocking the flow.
I vote asshole. His mother seemed to think that he was well within his rights to do these things. I agree. He was. But he was still an asshole.
Second situation - Japanese steakhouse. Eight people sitting around a shared table. One family of mom and two kids (3 and 8?). One family of two parents and a child (7?). Those six people seem to be together, celebrating the birthday of the 8 year old. Other two people are a mother and son of about 10. During the fire show at another table, the younger kids at the next table get excited. No obvious reaction from the ten year old. Parents of younger children are building up the show, saying that their chef would be coming soon and they could see the same thing at their table. Their chef shows up and the one mother of the ten year old speaks up and asks that there not be a show at that table because her son is sensitive and doesn't like the clanging of the utensils or fire. Mom of 8 year states that they are there to celebrate a birthday and were expecting the show. First mom accuses the second of being insensitive to special needs children and calls for a manager to intervene. We leave so I don't see the outcome.
I vote ten year old mom as the asshole. A show is part of the experience. Otherwise, just order take out or go to a cheaper Hibachi to go place.
But I've had some pain issues this week and openly admit that my patience is limited. What say the Peas?
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Deleted
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Jun 2, 2024 10:03:45 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Sept 8, 2018 19:05:21 GMT
9 year old? I vote child, doing childish things. We all had our arsehole moments as children I'm sure, thank god the internet wasn't judging us all.
Mother of 10 year old should have taken her child somewhere else.
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Post by katlady on Sept 8, 2018 19:05:23 GMT
1st situation - not an a$$hole
2nd situation - definitely. The mom should have told the restaurant ahead of time. The other family went there for the show. The restaurant, if they had known ahead of time, could have made different seating arrangements.
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johnnysmom
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Jun 25, 2014 21:16:33 GMT
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Post by johnnysmom on Sept 8, 2018 19:09:19 GMT
The first one is so iffy. As a mom of 2 boys with a 9 year age gap it's tough to tame the older one while at a destination for little ones (though this type of places sounds like it wasn't all that appropriate for the 5yo either, sounds more like a toddler area). I would certainly tell the older to knock it off and not spray the moms or babies (preschool kids are fair game as long as they're enjoying it, if it upset them I'd tell him to stop that as well), he also needs to be mindful that this is a baby area and he needs to act appropriately for that. That said, it's really on the mom to make sure he has appropriate time/places to play so he's able to reel it in sometimes too. (and yes, I've btdt, not at a splash pad but other places).
Second one, I agree with you assuming this restaurant has non-hibatchi tables (all the ones I've ever been to do have both and you can order anything on the menu regardless of where you're sitting).
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Post by papercrafteradvocate on Sept 8, 2018 19:10:02 GMT
Situation #1 meh, kids being kids as long as they are not hurting anyone or bullying. If he was bullying the kids and parents, yes, asshole!
Situation #2. Yes. Definitely asshole of the 10-yr old mom making that request, since it is a GROUP setting. I hope the manager moved the 10-yr old family away. They could sit at the sushi bar or get theirs to go. I HATE when you go to places like that and there is someone who is grumpy, or dictates how everyone else should act/have/be for their table.
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Post by padresfan619 on Sept 8, 2018 19:12:54 GMT
First one - he’s just a kid. I have a hard time calling kids (that aren’t my own) assholes.
Second one - mom was the jerk, why bother going to hibachi if you don’t want the show? That’s what you’re paying for. She should have left.
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GiantsFan
Prolific Pea
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Jun 27, 2014 14:44:56 GMT
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Post by GiantsFan on Sept 8, 2018 19:18:57 GMT
I'm not a parent so take my answers with that in mind.
#1 - Possibly, but he's stuck with toddlers in a kiddie area at a waterpark. He probably wants to be out doing the fun stuff. He should have a friend his age with him.
#2 - Yes. The mother should have excused herself and son from the party. Clearly when you go to one of those places its for the "show".
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Deleted
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Jun 2, 2024 10:03:45 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Sept 8, 2018 19:19:53 GMT
Situation #1 - Mom is an asshole for not stopping her son from spraying other adults who are obviously not there to get wet.
Situation #2 - Mom is an asshole for subjecting her sensitive special needs child to a restaurant that has fire shows at every single table. She's also an entitled asshole who thinks she should be able to dictate what service other patrons at her table receives.
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Deleted
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Jun 2, 2024 10:03:45 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Sept 8, 2018 19:23:24 GMT
#1. Boy is a brat and mother should have taken him home.
# 2. Those restaurants are expensive. I would’ve pissed if somebody ruined the experience. That special snowflake mom needed to move to another table.
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Post by jumperhop on Sept 8, 2018 20:05:50 GMT
Can’t get past the fact that you called a nine year old little boy a Ahole. That’s more of an issue to me than a child running wild at a water park.
Jen
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Post by nlwilkins on Sept 8, 2018 20:05:52 GMT
#1 Ten year olds know better and this one was being a jerk. Spraying mothers on purpose is wrong. If he is not taught by the age of ten to be respectful, when will he learn. In fact at ten, he does not need parents to teach him that is wrong, he would not have spayed those mothers if he was not trying to "get" them. He shows a distinct lack of consideration. How would he have felt if it was him being treated that way?
#2 Mother was an asshole. Why go to a restaurant like that if your child would get upset by the show?
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Post by mustlovecats on Sept 8, 2018 20:18:57 GMT
Neither situation would be ok with me.
If I’m at the water park with my kids and someone in the water near us accidentally gets splashed, i consider that part of being at the water park. Intentionally targeting someone who isn’t in the water would not be something I accepted my kids doing.
The cooking show is part of the Japanese steakhouse experience. The child who can’t handle it should step out while it’s going on or choose another restaurant. But the rest of the people there went for that experience.
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Post by huskermom98 on Sept 8, 2018 20:19:10 GMT
#1--I'd be mad with the 9yo for spraying the adults (regardless of whether or not he was my child). Otherwise I'd just say he's being a jerk, borderline "little s#!%" depending on his history. I'm sure he was bored, but someone needed to stop that behavior before something happens.
#2--Mom is definitely out of line. Those meals are not cheap and part of the cost is the show. If your child can't handle it then you need to pick another place.
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Post by mikklynn on Sept 8, 2018 20:19:46 GMT
Situation #1 - Mom is an asshole for not stopping her son from spraying other adults who are obviously not there to get wet. Situation #2 - Mom is an asshole for subjecting her sensitive special needs child to a restaurant that has fire shows at every single table. She's also an entitled asshole who thinks she should be able to dictate what service other patrons at her table receives. YES! |
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Post by christine58 on Sept 8, 2018 20:24:38 GMT
I vote asshole. His mother seemed to think that he was well within his rights to do these things. I agree. He was. But he was still an asshole. Nope a typical 9 year old being a jerk...but not an asshole And the other...give me a fucking break with all these "special snowflakes". You know up front what goes on at a hibachi place. Don't take him...she's an asshole |
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gina
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,228
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Post by gina on Sept 8, 2018 20:29:38 GMT
1) Kid is a jerk. Mom is an asshole. I'm sorry but none of my kids ever would have done that (yeah yeah "not my kid"  ) They just wouldn't. I didn't raise them to be little turds in public so in turn, I couldn't be deemed an asshole. 2) Asshole. |
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Post by scrappysurfer on Sept 8, 2018 20:45:40 GMT
1. Child seems to be starved for attention
2. Asshole mother for sure.
My biggest problem is, how could you possibly leave without finding out how scenario #2 turned out.
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Post by gigi333 on Sept 8, 2018 20:54:09 GMT
I know my sister would never tolerate my nephew doing that to people at a park, seems like the poor child is not being thought any manners, which is going to really impact his life
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Deleted
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Jun 2, 2024 10:03:45 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Sept 8, 2018 21:13:35 GMT
There was a lesson here:
The mom should have coached her son to play nicely with the smaller children.
:
My son earn some extra cash when he was 8-10 by playing with little ones when he was the only one his age at the park. A lot of moms were happy to have someone , not them, play with their kid. One mom gave him $10 for it.
The other mom could have helped her child partipate. They could have stood back , they could have stayed until it got to much. There is always the option to leave and come back. I would like to think that she explained what was going to happen, what food was on the menu and how long they were going to be there. We could have never taken our son to a place like that without preparing him.
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gramma
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Location: Sacramento, Ca
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Post by gramma on Sept 8, 2018 21:28:01 GMT
To me both situations scream "I can do whatever I want to do. Regardless of the impact my behaviour has on others." So while the 9 year old may not be an A-hole now he is being trained to become one. JOOLO
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TheOtherMeg
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Jun 25, 2014 20:58:14 GMT
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Post by TheOtherMeg on Sept 8, 2018 21:34:26 GMT
Mom of four boys all over 15yo here. I vote boy in Situation #1 to be a jerk who, barring a social/emotional/psychological/? issue, should absolutely know not to squirt water at people in street clothes and/or intentionally disrupt toddlers having fun.
Mom in Situation #2 is an asshole. Every parent I know with a special needs child researches new environments (restaurants, parks, whatever) before showing up. If you know fire and loud, clanky noises upset your child, it's 100% your responsibility to not go to a restaurant that has a fire cooking show (or to at least reserve a table in the non-show section, if there is one). I mean, duh.
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katybee
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,378
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Post by katybee on Sept 8, 2018 21:51:58 GMT
First...asshole is a word I would never use to describe a child.
BUT... the nine year old at the water park was out of line. I cannot believe how many people excuse his behavior. He DELIBERATELY targeted the mothers in street clothes. And then it sounds like he was messing with babies. It might have been fun for him, but not the mothers and the babies. There were other ways he could have had fun. His mother should have stopped him. I don’t have kids, but I often take my class of 20 kindergartners to playgrounds that also have small children (or the children’s museum). And I expect them to be respectful and careful around them. And they ARE. I would never excuse this kind of behavior. I would want my kid (3rd or maybe 4th grader) to be the NICE kid.
Second situation... why on earth would a mother take her sensitive child to a hibachi restaurant? There are plenty of Asian restaurants that don’t have a knife and fire show. You go to a hibachi restaurant for the knife and fire show. That is completely entitled behavior.
Maybe I’m salty because I deal with parents like these every year. The kids aren’t assholes, but the parents might be. And if they continue to parent that way, the kids will grow up to be assholes.
JMHO.
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Post by myshelly on Sept 8, 2018 22:00:35 GMT
1st situation - kid is an asshole. His mom is a clueless asshole.
2nd situation - special snowflake mom is asshole. Don’t eat there if you don’t want a show. That’s the whole point.
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Post by littlemama on Sept 8, 2018 22:08:54 GMT
#1. Jerky, but he also didnt have anyone even close to his own age to play with.
#2. Part of the hibachi experience is the show. If you or your child is not interested in the show, go elsewhere. I am almost positive that you can order the hibachi food on the non-hibachi side of the restaurant. Mom was an asshole. She clearly was familiar with the hibachi experience, so would know that there would be other people at the table.
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pinklady
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,563
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Post by pinklady on Sept 8, 2018 23:13:18 GMT
Newsflash, 9 year old kids CAN most definitely be assholes. Unclutch.  Situation #1: Asshole kid and asshole mom. Situation #2: Asshole mom |
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Deleted
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Jun 2, 2024 10:03:45 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Sept 8, 2018 23:34:05 GMT
It is really okay for op to say that here, instead of saying to real life people.
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Post by alexa11 on Sept 8, 2018 23:34:53 GMT
Situation #1 - Mom is an asshole for not stopping her son from spraying other adults who are obviously not there to get wet. Situation #2 - Mom is an asshole for subjecting her sensitive special needs child to a restaurant that has fire shows at every single table. She's also an entitled asshole who thinks she should be able to dictate what service other patrons at her table receives. Yes- this. If he had sprayed me while I was in street clothes, I would've probably been kicked out of the park because the mom would've gotten an earful. And the second situation is just ridiculous... |
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Post by AussieMeg on Sept 9, 2018 0:08:55 GMT
#1. 9yo is a turd and his mother should have stopped his turd-like behaviour.
#2. Mum is an entitled jerk and should have take her child to a different restaurant and not ruined the experience for others.
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AnotherPea
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,968
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Post by AnotherPea on Sept 9, 2018 0:35:57 GMT
Thanks for validating, everyone!
I'll try to use the word jerk here, instead of asshole. Jerk is just a euphemism for a-hole in my neck of the woods, and it describes anyone that intentionally tries to be a nuisance to others, to ruin their fun or cause problems.
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kate
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Post by kate on Sept 9, 2018 2:09:13 GMT
I would have been quite unhappy with the 9yo. Sometimes it takes a LOT of self-control for me to leave my teacher hat behind in those circumstances - sooooo tempting to give a little lesson on empathy to kids who behave that way - but I think I would have judged in silence here, since nobody was actually in danger.
Japanese steakhouse? Mom had inappropriate expectations and reasonable alternatives. It was not okay for her to change the other family's experience in this case.
JM2C
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) They just wouldn't. I didn't raise them to be little turds in public so in turn, I couldn't be deemed an asshole.
