milocat
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,423 
Location: 55 degrees north in Alberta, Canada
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Post by milocat on Dec 21, 2018 15:36:59 GMT
I agree with some others, she's a genius. She's been burnt by these crappy gift exchange games and she bought something she wanted and hoped she could get or steal.
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bethany102399
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,521
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Post by bethany102399 on Dec 21, 2018 15:38:17 GMT
And in the case of the hostess who should have gotten the gingerbread house, that’s just crappy for someone to steal it away from her! I agree, what a bitch. (the lady who stole it) that's just rude. As someone who has repeatedly brought something nice and gotten burned at the office white elephant I was all set not to participate this year. I was really happy when they decided to go another direction and wound up sitting at a table with people I didn't know very well and had a great time decorating a gingerbread house with them. I almost peed myself at one point I was laughing so hard. It was a wonderful change of pace. |
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sweetandsour
Full Member
Posts: 227
Jun 30, 2014 17:43:52 GMT
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Post by sweetandsour on Dec 21, 2018 15:49:37 GMT
What a coincidence that the same person got to pick last, two years in a row! 
I wouldn't say it's rude to take back your own gift - but very weird.
But I suggest that there be a rule that you can't always arrange to pick last, because picking last is the best - you get to choose whatever you want.
At my current workplace, everyone brings the most wonderful $25 and under gifts. I have no worries about going home with a "dud." We do a variant of "Stealing Santa" where you can steal gifts but no one can unwrap them. When the last person goes, that is when everyone unwraps their box.
I think I told the story here before, but at my former workplace, a male colleague's (let's call him Chris) contribution to "Stealing Santa" was unworn men's thermal shirt and longjohns that he had owned for so long, the packaging was yellowed and crumbly  and the shirt/longjohns weren't exactly white anymore either.
The social committee at work had re-wrapped all the gifts into common size boxes and Chris went first. He chose his own gift  and no one stole from him. Everyone had brought good gifts that didn't appear to be 25 years old.
I felt bad for him and suggested to a few colleagues we chip in to get something else for him, until someone from the social committee told me that Chris ended up with his own gift and suggested that this was karma for him. |
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 4, 2024 23:06:59 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 21, 2018 15:51:13 GMT
I think that kind of gift exchange sounds as much fun as sticking your hand in a blender.
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Post by dillydally on Dec 21, 2018 16:00:25 GMT
I will admit to having done that, but for a different reason - i could tell that the person who got my gift wasn’t thrilled, so I stole it back so he could steal something he liked (this is a work group, 15 women and 1 single guy - lots of the gifts are Christmas decor related and sometimes its hard to find something that appeals to both sexes).
But no one knew it was my gift. In your situation, it is kind of weird that she made it clear it was her gift and stole it back.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 4, 2024 23:06:59 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 21, 2018 16:22:06 GMT
She should have kept her mouth shut and no one would have been the wiser. My strategy for these games have been to try and steal a gift that has already been stolen once so that it couldn’t be stolen again.  Please peas, don’t call this game a Chinese gift exchange. That’s pretty racist. |
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pancakes
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,993
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Post by pancakes on Dec 21, 2018 16:22:20 GMT
I just don't like calling it Dirty Santa. It makes me think of Dirty Old Man. Around here it is called either White Elephant gift exchange or Chinese Gift exchange. We can steal a gift twice and the 3rd time it is frozen with that person. At our exchange this year, someone brought sofa pillows that were decorated for Christmas. I noticed she selected her pillows. I felt OK with that. I have been burned too many times with these exchanges, I don't begrudge a person making sure he/she gets home with something that is wanted. IMO, unless you are restricted to exchanging only goods made in China or with a Chinese-inspired theme, "Chinese Gift exchange" isn't the best way to describe a gift exchange. Agree...it sounds like the name originated as a racial stereotype. We call it White Elephant. |
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Post by Sparki on Dec 21, 2018 16:22:29 GMT
At our recent party, our boxes are wrapped but not labeled. No one knows who brought what gift. My husband picked and unwrapped and wound up with a bag that could be called a purse. Another lady took pity on him and stole it from him. At that point, he picked a gift that he knew we had brought, so he knew he would go home with something that he could use.
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Post by Really Red on Dec 21, 2018 16:45:47 GMT
I don't mind these exchanges, but I was part of my new group's exchange for the first time last year. There were NO rules, just cost. I brought a beautiful crystal dish that I got at 75% off. The head of HR opened my present and made such a face and made an ugly comment about it. It really hurt my feelings. Apparently people gave either wine, lottery tickets or gift cards (what is the point of that?!) or a really stupid gift like a fart machine or something. But the comment that lady said stayed with me. She was fired this year and everyone went to a luncheon for her, but I had an urgent project that day.
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Post by ajsweetpea on Dec 21, 2018 16:46:22 GMT
Haha, well I hate to confess this but I'm someone who tries to take home my own gift every year. I've been burned with that game one too many times. Once we had a $25 gift exchange and I ended up with a kid's magic set that must have cost all of $6. I was in my 30's at the time, so I had no use for such an item. Realistically, who is going to want that? In other years, people brought old purses from the 1980's, used cuff links, etc. I just got annoyed spending the correct amount and getting junk in return. Also, a lot of people bring wine (I don't drink frequently), Starbucks gift cards (I don't go to Starbucks, etc.) I feel like I have enough stuff as it is in my house and I don't want to add more stuff that I'm not going to use. Maybe I'm turning into an old person?!
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Post by librarylady on Dec 21, 2018 16:49:11 GMT
I just don't like calling it Dirty Santa. It makes me think of Dirty Old Man. Around here it is called either White Elephant gift exchange or Chinese Gift exchange. We can steal a gift twice and the 3rd time it is frozen with that person. At our exchange this year, someone brought sofa pillows that were decorated for Christmas. I noticed she selected her pillows. I felt OK with that. I have been burned too many times with these exchanges, I don't begrudge a person making sure he/she gets home with something that is wanted. IMO, unless you are restricted to exchanging only goods made in China or with a Chinese-inspired theme, "Chinese Gift exchange" isn't the best way to describe a gift exchange. I agree 100%. I always wondered how/why it was ever nicknamed that.
Perhaps that is how it got changed to "dirty Santa."
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Post by myboysnme on Dec 21, 2018 17:04:49 GMT
I don't really care if she took her own slippers, but who brings slippers? That is a very specific thing regarding size.
I went to two of these things this year and I know that neither person was that thrilled with my gifts, even though I thought it was a nice gift, and I tried to wrap it nicely as well. So it can really be a crapshoot.
One thing I did not like at the one I went to yesterday is that some gifts were gag gifts - a box of Depends, a fleet enema, some hemorrhoid wipes. The people that got those were very disappointed and no one swiped those gifts. I feel like they all have to be stupid gifts or not. I do not want to bring a nice item and go home with an enema kit. But other people (who didn't get those items) thought it was hilarious.
For me White Elephant is an already owned but unwanted item. Yankee Swap is a non specific gift exchange, where you don't know who will get your gift. |
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Post by cmpeter on Dec 21, 2018 17:18:43 GMT
I wouldn’t even think of taking my own gift home...for me the fun is picking a gift that will be stolen the most and seeing it make someone else happy. Sure, I’ve ended up with “oatmeal” before, but what I get isn’t really important to me. I’ve taken the “oatmeal” on purpose from a friend before.
We do a $25 limit and it’s got to be a new item. I like the dice version suggestion above,..I’ll have to remember that for next year!
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Post by dudleypippen on Dec 21, 2018 17:38:50 GMT
We always start our game by announcing the rules- twice stolen an item is dead and cannot be stolen by anyone, including the final person. Also, you cannot take your own present. There is always a dud or two in the mix (this year I got one) but overall everyone plays fairly so we keep the tradition.
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Post by Lovebug2867 on Dec 21, 2018 17:48:36 GMT
I refuse to participate in these type of gift exchanges anymore. I always go above and beyond the price limit and end up with crap. The last one I did I made up a gift basket with mugs, cocoa and all the trimmings (really high end stuff too) the price limit for the exchange was $30. At the end of the night I ended up with some candles and a pair of gloves....both items came from the dollar tree so I ended up with $2 worth of junk I didn't need.
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Post by NanaKate on Dec 21, 2018 17:48:37 GMT
Around here it is stated before the swap starts that you don’t take your own present back 🙄 I too, am not a fan of these games... |
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Post by heckofagal on Dec 21, 2018 18:21:33 GMT
...just wanted to add that I am a new Rae Dunn collector and my family is judging me each time I bring home a new piece, and I have considered buying Rae Dunn to bring for our Christmas Rob Your Neighbor game in hopes that I could bring home my gift.
J/K... I have already gotten a movie gift card.
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Post by ajsweetpea on Dec 21, 2018 18:54:17 GMT
I don't really care if she took her own slippers, but who brings slippers? That is a very specific thing regarding size.
I went to two of these things this year and I know that neither person was that thrilled with my gifts, even though I thought it was a nice gift, and I tried to wrap it nicely as well. So it can really be a crapshoot.
One thing I did not like at the one I went to yesterday is that some gifts were gag gifts - a box of Depends, a fleet enema, some hemorrhoid wipes. The people that got those were very disappointed and no one swiped those gifts. I feel like they all have to be stupid gifts or not. I do not want to bring a nice item and go home with an enema kit. But other people (who didn't get those items) thought it was hilarious.
For me White Elephant is an already owned but unwanted item. Yankee Swap is a non specific gift exchange, where you don't know who will get your gift. See, I think if someone is going to bring a gag gift, they should include a gift card as well or something else nice with it. Sure, bring the box of Depends, but attach a gift card. Then you can have the laugh and the person gets something they can enjoy too. |
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snyder
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,942
Location: Colorado
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Post by snyder on Dec 21, 2018 19:31:04 GMT
I can see both sides. My son got full custody of my grandson when he was 3 years old, so I have been very involved in his life when it came to him needing gifts and the like for whatever reason. His youth group would have these Dirty Santa gift exchanges and he would always come home with a $1 or $2 lame gift when the dollar limit was $10. Was a bit aggravating as we always tried to put a lot of thought into the gifts he chose to take. Anyway, one year he comes home with his own gift and I questioned him about it and he said there was really nothing worth $10 and I liked my gift. This is from like a 12-13 year old that normally is very laid back with a heart of gold and normally would not even think about the value of a gift, but just that it was a gift someone picked out because they like it. If participants followed the rules to begin with, one probably wouldn't be so tempted to choose your own gift. ha!
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Post by myboysnme on Dec 21, 2018 19:59:55 GMT
See, I think if someone is going to bring a gag gift, they should include a gift card as well or something else nice with it. Perfect solution! I gotta get that to go viral somehow. |
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Post by auntkelly on Dec 21, 2018 20:57:16 GMT
What a coincidence that the same person got to pick last, two years in a row!
I know that she was last to pick this year. I don't remember whether she was last to pick last year. She might have been the second person to pick her gift, which would have frozen it, or she might have picked her own gift and no one stole it from her |
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Post by clarencelynn on Dec 21, 2018 21:20:27 GMT
I was almost that lady in my White Elephant exchange this year. This is my first holiday season with this company and I wasn't sure what type of gifts they usually brought (raunchy? booze? silly? regular?) so I picked a pretty safe gift of a hot sauce sampler with the idea that if the person that picked it looked less than thrilled I would steal it from them. Or if it was still on the table when it was my turn to pick and it was a 'stupid' gift compared to what I had already seen picked, I would pick it. No one knew who brought which present so I would have been pretty safe to pick my own, but then the fear that someone would have known somehow that I picked my own would have been embarrassing. Luckily, the hot sauce sampler was picked pretty early and was a pretty hot item, as it was stolen the maximum amount of times allowed. I ended up with some stemless wine glasses, which were pretty cute.
So, as for the woman that purposely took her own present after telling you how cool they were was a little rude. The fact that she was 'selling you on her cool gift' then stole them away kinda stinks.
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Post by annabella on Dec 21, 2018 21:23:21 GMT
It just seems to me that it goes against the spirit of a gift exchange to purposely take home the gift you brought. I would have said something, "hey you're stealing back your own gift?" hopefully she would be publicly embarrassed. |
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caangel
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,449
Location: So Cal
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Post by caangel on Dec 21, 2018 21:32:42 GMT
I just don't like calling it Dirty Santa. It makes me think of Dirty Old Man. Around here it is called either White Elephant gift exchange or Chinese Gift exchange. We can steal a gift twice and the 3rd time it is frozen with that person. At our exchange this year, someone brought sofa pillows that were decorated for Christmas. I noticed she selected her pillows. I felt OK with that. I have been burned too many times with these exchanges, I don't begrudge a person making sure he/she gets home with something that is wanted. IMO, unless you are restricted to exchanging only goods made in China or with a Chinese-inspired theme, "Chinese Gift exchange" isn't the best way to describe a gift exchange. A real Chinese gift exchange would be a bunch of red envelopes filled with cash which I'd be all for! IMO Dirty Santa would give me the impression the gifts would be NSFW. |
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Post by chaosisapony on Dec 21, 2018 21:38:47 GMT
We do a White Elephant exchange at the office. This is only my second year there and I'm about over it. The rules are: -Gifts can be stolen twice. -You cannot steal back a gift that was stolen from you. -Items can be new or used, no value specified. The first year I brought in a large bottle of olive oil that we had pressed from our small family orchard. It was a hit and people fought over it. I wound up taking home used pot holders, cans of air, and three bags of hideous red and gold pinecones. This year I brought a bottle of champagne, again it was a desired gift. I unwrapped a lovely platter (clearly older from someone's kitchen) with a bakery gift card attached to it. I was delighted by it. So of course someone stole it from me and I wound up going home with someone's 15 year old (at least she told me that's how long it's been in her closet) paraffin wax thing that makes your hands soft. It's completely filled with old, hard wax. The person that brought it thought it was hilarious. I wasn't amused. In my opinion a used item is fine, a regifted item is fine, but I'm tired of taking home things that belong in the garbage or random household objects that are "gifts" simply because they are put in wrapping paper.
We don't tell each other who brought each gift so if someone were to go home with their own gift we'd never know. I think what is described in the OP is kind of weird but not necessarily rude.
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Post by mrssmith on Dec 21, 2018 21:45:06 GMT
I think it's weird to take your own gift home, but if not against the rules and no one was mad, why not! However, given her comments to you, it sounds like this might not be the game for her. Her tastes might be too specific.
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Post by librarylady on Dec 21, 2018 21:48:16 GMT
LOL--everyone would be fighting over that!
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Post by PEAcan pie on Dec 21, 2018 22:11:47 GMT
I think it is tacky and strange...if everyone took their own gift back, then what is the point.
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Montannie
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,486
Location: Big Sky Country
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Post by Montannie on Dec 21, 2018 22:54:10 GMT
This year, two people brought items they found in a former employee's office as they were cleaning it out. I thought THAT was tacky.
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Post by Margie on Dec 21, 2018 22:57:42 GMT
A little off-topic here, but in the same Dirty Santa vein...
One of my friends has a potluck jewelry exchange the first weekend of December every year to kick off the holidays.
Everyone brings their (mostly) costume jewelry that they no longer use. We set everything out in her living room and look around at all the other goodies while we eat and drink visit with each other.
Once we're ready, we pick numbers to determine the order. Then the rest of the evening is picking-stealing-picking-stealing jewelry. After two steals, the item is dead.
After a pre-determined number of rounds, the hostess calls a free-for-all, and we get to browse through all that's been left and take anything we'd like. I usually end up picking a few pieces for my granddaughters during the free-for-all.
The really great thing about this, besides us all getting to take home some really nice costume jewelry (and actually this year we added accessories of any kind, so I cleaned out my closet and took a bunch of purses that I no longer use), is that whatever is left, our hostess gathers up and takes to a local organization that helps women in shelters get back on their feet. We've received some lovely thank you letters that show us that these simple little things have really meant a lot to these women. During the year we also donate clothes we no longer use that would be appropriate for women who are job hunting.
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_on_the_beach.jpg)
and the shirt/longjohns weren't exactly white anymore either.
and no one stole from him. Everyone had brought good gifts that didn't appear to be 25 years old.
