S/O would you or have you changed your name later in life?

I changed my name legally in my 30's. It's not expensive at all, just has a number of steps, plus the hassle of changing your license and other accounts. I changed my entire name. I'm so happy I did.

I haven't. My sister went by one of her middle names for a while in high school and still has a few friends who call her by that -she reverted to her first name in her early 20s.

I think moving to a new place is a good way to 'start over' with a new name - especially if no one you know already will be in the area. Just introduce yourself as 'new name' everywhere. If your new name is a middle name or a variation on one of your names - you can probably get away with using it even for doctors and banking etc...

I'm going through a divorce and I'm considering changing back to my maiden name. I don't have minor children so it won't be a hassle in that way. But what about all the other stuff... licenses, teaching certificate, bank info, credit cards, social security card, etc? I really don't want to keep going by my married name though. Can anyone give any advice on how it went for them? Was it worth it?

Cindy

My brother and sister legally changed their names when they were adults.

My brother started formally going by the full version of his first name instead of the nickname he was known by (which was another form of the name) and he picked a new middle name and made his old middle name his last name.

My sister flat out picked new first, middle, and last names!

My brother's wife changed her name as an adult; IIRC, her given name was Mary and she thought it was too boring, so she changed it to Marguerite.

But I don't think I could ever do something like that... heck, I had such angst over losing my surname when we got married that I dropped my middle name and changed it to my last name, lol. I never even went by a nickname growing up, or anything, either. I think I'd feel like I was 'pretending' to be someone else, somehow, if I ever changed my first name.

I changed my last name when I divorced. I moved my married last name to a middle name position then added back my maiden name. I have 4 names now. I was in my 40s. I considered picking a entire new identity but felt my parents would be upset and not understand. Plus both my married and maiden names are very common so I am difficult to find on google.

My dad has gone by his middle name his whole life. At 30 he moved, started a new job and tried to go by his first name but he kept forgetting to respond to it. Didn't take people long to realize it wasn't what he was accustomed to being called. So that ended up being a bust.

If you change your first name make sure it is something you are tuned into and will respond to or people will start asking what they should be calling you.

Unless I was given horrible names from my parents, I can’t imagine changing them. I would be really upset if my kids changed their names.

When my sister and I married our spouses, we added our maiden name as a second middle name. Our maiden name is important to us and we were the last in our family to have it since my dad had us two girls and no boys to continue carrying it. When our sons were born we each gave our maiden name as their middle name.

When my sister divorced her first husband she went back to her full given name. Dropped assholes surname. When she remarried, she added her maiden name once again as her middle name and dropped her given middle name. I was so angry at her for doing that as each of our children have all or part of their name as a family name. Emma’s middle name is Nicole for her aunt. Now aunt doesn’t have Nicole as her middle anymore and it really bugs me. My sister is regretful of doing that now, but she hasn’t changed it back so not regretful enough in my eyes.

cindytred, I changed back to my maiden name when I got divorced.  I took an afternoon off and went to all the places I needed to change it and it was no big deal.  Nobody even needed to see my divorce paperwork.  My birth certificate was good enough.  I changed right back to my birth name.  When I got remarried, I changed my middle name to my maiden name (I did that the first time I got married too) and I took my DH name as my last name.  So, in total, I've changed my name three times.  The headache is worth it to me to have the name I want. 

I would love to change my first name. I was named after an evil woman , who was named after an equally evil woman.

I should have change my name before the one died. It would have been very liberating and a good slap to the head to that woman. I should do it before her granddaughters die.

I kept my maiden name when I married but because i have both uncommon first and last names I’ve sometimes wished I could be more “anonymous”. But not enough to go through the effort of changing them.

I’ve shared this before, but my husband grew up with a truly awful last name. He had plans to change it before we got married but we ended up moving our wedding up and didn’t have time. As a result (and because I’m a bit of a feminist), I didn’t take his name.

A few years later, we started having kids, and learned that you can give your kids any last name you want. So, from day one, their birth certificate had the ‘new’ last name. When DH finally got around to changing it (maybe 7-8 years into our marriage), I still kept mine. But, as time goes on, and I got letters addressed to ‘Mrs XXX’ from the school, and as his wife, well... I’m pretty much known as the same last name now, too, even though it’s not legal. I have credit cards, I’m on utilities, my paycheck, the mortgage... everything except my driver’s license and social security card.

It does depend on your state as to what is required to legally change it, should you choose to go that route. Some places, usage is enough, and some, you have to go before a judge. Some (like my state) is sort of a mix, which is why I’ve changed it in my life for the most part, but haven’t ever bothered with the effort and expense for the last couple of things.

ETA: Of the 6 children in his family, none still have that last name. His sisters all happily took their husband’s name, one brother took his wife’s name, and the other brother and my husband changed to the same last name. His parents are salty about it, and engraved all of their names (with original last name) on the back of the headstone they purchased when they were prepaying for their funeral expenses.

My first name is long and my mother thought the shortened version was ugly so she started calling me by a name that is completely unrelated to either my first or middle names.

When I married I dropped my maiden name because it was difficult to spell and nearly unpronounceable for most people. At the time I thought about switching my legal first and middle names but decided I didn’t want to have to explain it to everyone I knew especially because no one really knows me by my birth name.

If I were you, Freebird, I’d give it a try!

My brother in law did, for sort of the opposite reasons. He’s an artist and had a “Bob Smith” type name. He wanted to be more unique and started using his grandmothers maiden name as his last name. He was in his 30’s.

I changed my first name from Kathy to Cindi in first grade. I have no recollection of why I wanted to. My mom was fine with it and it stick. I’ve been Cindi ever since. Luckily at the time it was easier to have your official records changed. Drivers license, SSN, passport all have my new first name.

I went back to my maiden name when I divorced in my 20's. It was a bit of a hassle but not nearly as much as it would have been to change my name again when I remarried a few years later and had two businesses and a lot more things in my name. That wasn't the only reason I chose to keep my maiden name. DH would rather I have changed my name but he knew before he proposed that I had said I was never changing my last name again. I do answer to Mrs. (his last name) when I'm with him at doctor's offices or with his business contacts. It's easier and fine with me.

I would have loved to use my middle name rather than Lisa which was very popular when I was young. However there is another family member with my middle name who I was named after and it would have been confusing. Now I don't encounter as many Lisa's as I used to so it doesn't bother me.