WHY are teenage girls so mean?

Wow, with "friends" like that, who needs enemies? Tell your DD they did her a favor by showing their true colors. Half the people in the group will stop talking to/hanging out with each other once they graduate anyway.

I agree. 

I have a few friends from HS, but mostly my friends are from college.

Why? Because they are all going through a highly stressful emotional time they don't know how to handle. One of the things we learned in an army family support group is when there is about to be a long term separation there WILL be arguing.... you can't separate from someone you are whole attached to. So the instinctive self defense mode is to fight and "cut" the strings. It is easier for many people to physically leave when they are mad/upset than when they feel all cozy and attached. Then in families make up later after the initial trauma of separation has happened. With friendships there may or may not be a reattachment after the trauma.

These girls are all about to go their separate ways into college or jobs or the stress of not knowing what they want to do. Your daughter was already gone so it was easy for the other two to target her. Before it is all over they will have their own cat fight and break up too.

Stuff like this is why I laugh when people say high school was the best time of their life. Really? Then you were one of the bitches, is what I always think.

I’m sorry for your dd. She will find a new group, and in time see what she was missing.

I don’t talk to anyone from high school, except the couple of people who happen to work at our company.

She'll be leaving them behind soon anyway.

It can, if framed properly. And a good life lesson that everyone is not your friend. My sons went through "friend withdrawal" once entering college, and they went locally. Friends go off to different schools, get jobs and are busier than they were in high school. They see a couple of friends during breaks and such but not frequently. 

I think the tattlers are worse. Your poor DD...

The Peas are here to hold your earrings!

I'm mad for your DD, too. Senior year is such a delicate and painful time.

Volt has a really good point about the separation. My DD had a weird experience when she finished elementary school (her classmates were scattering all over the city for middle school). During her last semester, she got scooped up by the cool girls and became their new "pet." I was horrified, because there was no way DD was going to be able to keep up with that crew, and I knew they could turn on her in an instant. I was also afraid she would turn her back on her two old nerdy friends. Several years later, DD is still friends with one of her old nerdy friends but (thank God) none of the cool girls. That separation period was an anomaly.

I hope your DD has at least one true friend to lean on during this time. Big hugs to her and to you!

I'm sorry to hear this. I went through a similar situation with my older daughter during her senior year of high school. I couldn't understand why she didn't want to break away from people who were treating her like crap. Her rationale was it was too late for her to make any new friends and she was just going to try and get through the rest of the year. I also have a close friend with the same situation and her daughter said the same thing!

There is a light at the end of the tunnel. When DD got out of high school, she made new friends and feels gratified because they love her for who she is. One of the people from high school ended up apologizing to her for the way he treated her, but it was a pretty empty apology, and she let him know it. It was really hard to watch her go through what she did, but it also helped her learn some valuable lessons on friendship, and I'm thankful she came out on the other side a stronger person.

Or who they feel inferior to for whatever imagined reason.

Once a mean girl, always a mean girl. I experienced it first-hand, 30 years after graduating.

Long story short, one of the popular hometown girls thought it would be a good idea to embarrass me in front of everyone at our reunion. Keep in mind, she owns a restaurant in my hometown that I always tried to patronize whenever I went home because I thought it was the right thing to do and we are all adults now.

I will never go to another function with those people again and I found out afterwards that she was very rude to parents of another classmate of ours when they had the gall to complain about one of their meals.

I’m just waiting for the Karma bus...

OP, sending good thoughts to your DD.

I don't remember seeing this in high school with my friends.  I can imagine it, but I only went to college with one of my friends and the rest of us never acted that way.

OP, that just flat out sucks.  It was a blessing in disguise for sure.  A really mean one though.

So sorry your dd has to endure this. My heart breaks for her and you! We went through similar problems with our dd. Last year of HS several friends turned on her. ( it had also happened in MS). She is an introvert also and I do believe that makes it harder.

Freshman year of college she was thrilled with her suite mates but then two of them turned into total mean girls ridiculing, laughing at her, omitting her etc.
it hurt a lot but the silver lining is she learned a lot from it. We talked a lot about friendship, insecurities, abusive behavior, staying true to your values, and that life ain’t fair.

She is stronger, more confident, and kinder now.

Please tell your dd from us that this too will pass. Those girls are acting out their own issues and using your dd. There are billions of people in the world so there will always be people who don’t like us. Remind her to feel the love of family and true friends. We feel for her and wish her quick healing from this undeserved wound.

Aw, girl, I'm so so, sorry. There is really nothing I can say to make her or YOU feel better. We Mama Bears always have to hurt right along with them and it.is.hard!!! The tough thing is that many posts above are right on. She will get through this. But nothing anything says takes away the hurt now. What you CAN do is love her....and make sure she knows how you care. She might not say so, but that simply means the world. Having Mama there, totally in her corner, does help patch the wound.

I wish we moms came with a magic wand to "fix" things. But I guess it's good that we don't. We'd try to fix things that our kids need to go through in order to deal with life.

You're a good Mama...remember that. Your caring heart is one of the best gifts she will ever have in all her life.