Deleted
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Apr 27, 2024 3:10:56 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 21, 2019 14:15:10 GMT
Online Momming in the ‘Perfectly Imperfect’ Age - a fun read if you like this kind of thing... www.thecut.com/2019/04/online-moms-mommyblogs-instagram.html"Over the past year I’ve noticed a shift in tone among the mom-influencers I follow on social media. They’re fed up with feeling judged by other moms. Other moms — ordinary moms like me, it would seem — are full of negative feedback about their choices. But no matter, because these moms want to reclaim and celebrate their flaws. They’re #perfectlyimperfect members of the #motherhoodrising #mamarazzi and they’re sharing their authentic, unfiltered #motherhoodunplugged, #candidchildhood moments. There are nothing but good intentions behind these hashtags, but as I’ve scrolled through them, I’ve pondered the obvious question: This is supposed to be imperfect? Did someone move the goalposts and forget to tell me? “Perfectly imperfect” claims to reject the trap of perfectionism, and often appears alongside stories about a “journey” to self-acceptance, or a triumph over adversity. It’s often used to describe an overall approach to life: Forget the happy homemaker routine and embrace the chaos and love of your family life as it already is. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves here — she’s still a mom. In fact, she’s mom as fuck. Her maternal instincts are so honed, so visceral, she’s borderline terrifying. But also beautiful. On the inside AND on the outside. She’s caffeinated, motivated, hyperorganized, yet also soulful and vulnerable. She is all of these things and then some. Sometimes it’s hard to keep it all straight. The kids aren’t always smiling in the photos — we all know how hard it is to get them to pose. The perfectly imperfect mom loves her kids’ grimaces, and you can tell because she never fails to smile at them." |
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Post by SockMonkey on Apr 21, 2019 14:25:31 GMT
I find mom bloggers so exhausting. As a feminist, this is my biggest personal feminist struggle to not judge these women. It is my personal failing. I'm working on it.
But, damn.
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Post by mom on Apr 21, 2019 14:40:02 GMT
I have a very close friend who is trying to make establish herself as a mom blogger and she will frequently tag things #perfectlyimperfect - all the while, using a photo of her 3 kids that was staged, down to the coordinating outfits and lollipops in hand. She posts photos of her home and tags them as #lifeismessy. But the all white couch in the photo has perfectly coordinated pillows that are fluffed with a casual throw across the edge of the chair. Honestly? if this was anyone else I would have stopped looking at her stuff all together. She frequently posts things about how thankful she is and how real she is, etc and it just makes me want to scream. Its exhausting.
And its fake.
I would much rather she be open and honest about how stressful motherhood is. As a mom with older teens, I want to know someone else has PITA kids sometimes. So I would welcome if she would be real and authentic. But in reality, I don't think her or mom bloggers will ever be that way. Because that won't give them head pats and feed their ego.
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Deleted
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Apr 27, 2024 3:10:56 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 21, 2019 16:43:30 GMT
I have a very close friend who is trying to make establish herself as a mom blogger and she will frequently tag things #perfectlyimperfect - all the while, using a photo of her 3 kids that was staged, down to the coordinating outfits and lollipops in hand. She posts photos of her home and tags them as #lifeismessy. But the all white couch in the photo has perfectly coordinated pillows that are fluffed with a casual throw across the edge of the chair. Honestly? if this was anyone else I would have stopped looking at her stuff all together. She frequently posts things about how thankful she is and how real she is, etc and it just makes me want to scream. Its exhausting. And its fake. I would much rather she be open and honest about how stressful motherhood is. As a mom with older teens, I want to know someone else has PITA kids sometimes. So I would welcome if she would be real and authentic. But in reality, I don't think her or mom bloggers will ever be that way. Because that won't give them head pats and feed their ego. Agreed. It won't stop until we stop it by not giving our eyeballs to their fake-imperfect-while-posting-for-photoshoot posts, blogs, etc. When people stop need "gurus" to tell them how to be "perfectly imperfect" and stop viewing, clicking, commenting, etc. It will go away. Ad'ers go where the eyeballs go. Imagine if people's eyeballs were directed to sites about helping the homeless, reading to kids, volunteering, etc. But that's not the majority of the big follower accounts. They're about purses, shoes, home decor, messy (but really perfect) moppets. etc. It won't change until/unless we change. |
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Post by hop2 on Apr 21, 2019 16:57:37 GMT
Fact: if you don’t want to be judged don’t put it out on the internet. Because once you do people WILL judge you. No matter how hard they try, they will judge you. The nicer ones will keep their judgement to themselves, & you will never know about it. Other well meaning ones who don’t have a filter will tell you/advise you, when you didn’t ask for it. The nastiest most vicious will rip you apart.
I try not to judge these women, but in all honesty, I try harder not to judge/compare myself with thier online persona. Let’s face it all of them ‘curate’ what they put online. Even the most ‘honest’ or ‘unstaged’ ones pick & choose which moments to put out there. Judging yourself against one snippet of time that another person chooses to put out there is a loosing game. You compare your back stage to what they choose to put onstage.
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muggins
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,861 
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Post by muggins on Apr 21, 2019 16:57:49 GMT
I have a very close friend who is trying to make establish herself as a mom blogger and she will frequently tag things #perfectlyimperfect - all the while, using a photo of her 3 kids that was staged, down to the coordinating outfits and lollipops in hand. She posts photos of her home and tags them as #lifeismessy. But the all white couch in the photo has perfectly coordinated pillows that are fluffed with a casual throw across the edge of the chair. Honestly? if this was anyone else I would have stopped looking at her stuff all together. She frequently posts things about how thankful she is and how real she is, etc and it just makes me want to scream. Its exhausting. And its fake. I would much rather she be open and honest about how stressful motherhood is. As a mom with older teens, I want to know someone else has PITA kids sometimes. So I would welcome if she would be real and authentic. But in reality, I don't think her or mom bloggers will ever be that way. Because that won't give them head pats and feed their ego. Agreed. It won't stop until we stop it by not giving our eyeballs to their fake-imperfect-while-posting-for-photoshoot posts, blogs, etc. When people stop need "gurus" to tell them how to be "perfectly imperfect" and stop viewing, clicking, commenting, etc. It will go away. Ad'ers go where the eyeballs go. Imagine if people's eyeballs were directed to sites about helping the homeless, reading to kids, volunteering, etc. But that's not the majority of the big follower accounts. They're about purses, shoes, home decor, messy (but really perfect) moppets. etc. It won't change until/unless we change. I’ve never really followed any mom bloggers. I’ve always found them to be fake no matter how real they try to be. What really disturbs me at the moment is the amount of young women on YouTube who are trying to make a career as fashion influencers. Their channels are just constant hauls from various high street stores. It’s so disheartening to see so many young women wasting so much time on such vacuous pursuits. Buying huge amounts of clothing, trying it on, returning it to the store. DD’s friend wants to be a fashion influencer and is currently doing her final university dissertation on social media influencers:( |
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Post by mom on Apr 21, 2019 17:08:00 GMT
Agreed. It won't stop until we stop it by not giving our eyeballs to their fake-imperfect-while-posting-for-photoshoot posts, blogs, etc. When people stop need "gurus" to tell them how to be "perfectly imperfect" and stop viewing, clicking, commenting, etc. It will go away. Ad'ers go where the eyeballs go. Imagine if people's eyeballs were directed to sites about helping the homeless, reading to kids, volunteering, etc. But that's not the majority of the big follower accounts. They're about purses, shoes, home decor, messy (but really perfect) moppets. etc. It won't change until/unless we change. I’ve never really followed any mom bloggers. I’ve always found them to be fake no matter how real they try to be. What really disturbs me at the moment is the amount of young women on YouTube who are trying to make a living career as fashion influencers. Their channels are just constant hauls from various high street stores. It’s so disheartening to see so many young women wasting so much time on such vacuous pursuits. Buying huge amounts of clothing, trying it on, returning it to the store.DD’s friend wants to be a fashion influencer and is currently doing her final university dissertation on social media influencers:( This drives me nuts as well. One influencer that I had to unfollow (originally she was into fitness) is now shilling fashion and acting like she is a teen when in reality, she is over 35 with kids . Every week, new clothes, shoes. But meanwhile, she will tell you that no one in her house has insurance but brags for 'spending' upwards of $500 a month for content for her instagram page. I get it - clothes are fun and I love to shop. But dang, if my kids don't have insurance then I am going to stop shopping and shilling, and get a real job. The husband is also 'self employed' and they've bragged that they have no savings, no retirement. But girl has 4 pairs of Tori Burch flip flops for the coming season. |
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Post by mustlovecats on Apr 21, 2019 17:41:22 GMT
Agreed. It won't stop until we stop it by not giving our eyeballs to their fake-imperfect-while-posting-for-photoshoot posts, blogs, etc. When people stop need "gurus" to tell them how to be "perfectly imperfect" and stop viewing, clicking, commenting, etc. It will go away. Ad'ers go where the eyeballs go. Imagine if people's eyeballs were directed to sites about helping the homeless, reading to kids, volunteering, etc. But that's not the majority of the big follower accounts. They're about purses, shoes, home decor, messy (but really perfect) moppets. etc. It won't change until/unless we change. I’ve never really followed any mom bloggers. I’ve always found them to be fake no matter how real they try to be. What really disturbs me at the moment is the amount of young women on YouTube who are trying to make a living career as fashion influencers. Their channels are just constant hauls from various high street stores. It’s so disheartening to see so many young women wasting so much time on such vacuous pursuits. Buying huge amounts of clothing, trying it on, returning it to the store. DD’s friend wants to be a fashion influencer and is currently doing her final university dissertation on social media influencers:( Phew and a few of them are making so much money doing it that they have built these insane houses to hold all their expensive stuff. I’m not against people making money but sometimes the conspicuous consumerism is off putting to me. |
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