MizIndependent
Drama Llama
Quit your bullpoop.
Posts: 5,836
Jun 25, 2014 19:43:16 GMT
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Post by MizIndependent on Oct 24, 2019 23:02:39 GMT
Situation: You're second in line and the queue is about 10 people deep behind you. You've already been waiting about five minutes because the person at the register has a bag full of returns and the store is a bit short staffed at the moment, but you're patient.
Just then an apparent friend of the person in front of you walks up and proceeds to "get in line" ahead of you.
Do you say something?
Do you presume she was in line before you got there? (not what happened in my case, the one lady was there by herself then her friend cut the line and joined her)
Do you say nothing?
Extra info about the situation: Both women in front of you are women of color and younger (20's), you are a caucasian 40ish woman.
Now how do you handle it?
Personally, I just said nothing...I didn't want to end up on Youtube but I really thought it was unfair and rude and felt I wasn't allowed to stand up for myself at all. It was an irritating inconvenience but I would never do that to anyone.
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Post by freecharlie on Oct 24, 2019 23:07:40 GMT
Probably the same way you did but I would be irritated af
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Post by 950nancy on Oct 24, 2019 23:09:21 GMT
It was rude regardless of who chooses to do it.
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Post by nlwilkins on Oct 24, 2019 23:09:22 GMT
I might catch her eye and ask a question, something like, "Are you two making one transaction together?" or " Were you here before I came up? and just rejoined the line?" OR best of all, "What would you do if someone came up and cut in front of you like you just did?"
Then again, I might not get up the nerve to do so. Or I might make a loud comment to the person behind me in line to get my displeasure across.
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Post by mustlovecats on Oct 24, 2019 23:09:27 GMT
I would assume they had been shopping together and I would let it go. The races of the individuals involved wouldn’t matter to me in this scenario. It’s not that I don’t think that’s rude, I do think that’s rude, but I don’t know that speaking up would get anybody what they wanted so it would be better overall in my opinion to avoid a scene and get on with my day.
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Post by littlemama on Oct 24, 2019 23:10:05 GMT
Why did you feel that you werent able to stand up for yourself??
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MissChris
Full Member
Posts: 370
Jul 14, 2014 0:46:04 GMT
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Post by MissChris on Oct 24, 2019 23:25:53 GMT
One of my favorite shows is Dead Like Me. This is the same thing that happened with one of the characters (Rube) while waiting in line at the post office. Like you, I'd probably say nothing, but I'd want to be just like Rube and call her out. I've never attached a link to a post, so I hope this works. www.youtube.com/watch?v=614Orzf3SqA |
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Post by disneypal on Oct 24, 2019 23:33:10 GMT
I guess it depends...if she only had a few items, I probably wouldn't say anything, it just wouldn't be worth the confrontation. However, if she had several items that would take a bit of time to ring up, I might say something like "Excuse me, ma'am but I was next in line and I have been waiting a while"
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christinec68
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,135 
Location: New York, NY
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Post by christinec68 on Oct 24, 2019 23:42:47 GMT
Two people did that to me once, the second person arrived with her cart as I was about to put my things on the counter. I did say something and they replied that they were shopping together to which I responded that they should get in line together. She moved to the back of the line.
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Post by stingfan on Oct 24, 2019 23:45:12 GMT
My dh would say something and likely get into a confrontation.
I would roll my eyes and say nothing.
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MizIndependent
Drama Llama
Quit your bullpoop.
Posts: 5,836
Jun 25, 2014 19:43:16 GMT
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Post by MizIndependent on Oct 25, 2019 0:10:48 GMT
Why did you feel that you werent able to stand up for yourself?? I live in a VERY liberal city. I can easily see how an innocent "excuse me, there is a line" could turn into a youtube viral video simply because a caucasian woman had the audacity to speak against two women of color (even if they were acting badly).
Probably nothing would have happened, it wasn't a big enough deal to me to risk it though. She only had a couple of items anyway. Still pissed me off though.
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Post by malibou on Oct 25, 2019 0:11:43 GMT
I had a similar thing happen recently. I was about to let it go under the premise that perhaps they had been shopping together. Then I heard one of them comment that it had been ages since they saw each other, and I spoke up. They were shitty to me about it, but the people in line behind me took my side even though she was trying very hard to ignore us. The lady at the cash register clearly heard us and asked her to get back in line. Very sheepishly she did.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Oct 25, 2019 0:14:03 GMT
It’s situations like that when I really appreciate it if the clerk is paying attention and says something on my behalf such as, “I’m sorry but this lady here has been waiting and she is next. The line starts back there.”
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ashley
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,400
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Post by ashley on Oct 25, 2019 0:15:12 GMT
I say something like, “oh, the end of the line is back there!”
ETA: I don’t see how race is relevant in any way at all to this discussion. I wouldn’t treat people differently based on their skin tone.
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Post by ScrapbookMyLife on Oct 25, 2019 0:24:32 GMT
In that situation, it would annoy me but I wouldn't have said anything to the people in front of me.
In this day and age, you never know who has a quick fuse and temper and will get confrontational.
If the line was long, I would have already called out to the checker and said "can you please call for backup cashiers".
It irritates me that customers have to ask for backup cashiers. The cashiers should be more aware of the growing line and call for backup themselves, but they don't....that is why I never hesitate to ask.
The line jumpers that piss me off, are when there are multiple lines and a cashier opens and someone runs from the back of the line in an effort to be next. I always say something "I was next, the lady or man in front of me was next, etc..". The proper thing to do, would be for the cashier to say "next in line, over here".
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Post by elaine on Oct 25, 2019 0:26:57 GMT
With the multi-page thread re: “Tough Question” being on page 1 for the past couple of days, this feels like a test/set-up. You probably don’t mean it that way, MizIndependent, but many people wouldn’t touch this with a 10-ft pole right now. |
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Post by ScrapbookMyLife on Oct 25, 2019 0:27:48 GMT
I say something like, “oh, the end of the line is back there!” I like what Ashley said, but I never think quick enough or I take to long thinking of what commentary I want to say. |
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Post by birukitty on Oct 25, 2019 0:32:53 GMT
One of my favorite shows is Dead Like Me. This is the same thing that happened with one of the characters (Rube) while waiting in line at the post office. Like you, I'd probably say nothing, but I'd want to be just like Rube and call her out. I've never attached a link to a post, so I hope this works. www.youtube.com/watch?v=614Orzf3SqA Your link worked great and I was clapping at the end. I loved that! I, like all of you of course, hate when this happens. Why should we be afraid to speak up for ourselves when someone is clearly in the wrong and being extremely rude? I do speak up. I usually say something like, "Excuse me, the back of the line is right there" while pointing to it. It's a statement that means-you cut in front of me and you belong back there without speaking negatively about the person. If they give me an excuse I'll go from there. I'll have to remember some of the dialogue from the Youtube video and from the posts here for next time when the excuses come up. "I've got a cake in the oven". "He's got a doctor's appointment". ect. We all have a limited amount of time. Those are good. PS. I don't see race as a reason to alter if I speak up or not. I don't look at race that way-in my eyes people are people-we are all equal. I don't mean that as far as does rasism occur? Of course it does! It's a huge problem. |
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MizIndependent
Drama Llama
Quit your bullpoop.
Posts: 5,836
Jun 25, 2014 19:43:16 GMT
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Post by MizIndependent on Oct 25, 2019 0:33:35 GMT
With the multi-page thread re: “Tough Question” being on page 1 for the past couple of days, this feels like a test/set-up. You probably don’t mean it that way, @zingermack , but many people wouldn’t touch this with a 10-ft pole right now. Was that intended for the OP (me)? Zingermack hasn't commented here.
I only posted it because it actually happened to me and it pissed me off. Talking about it helps me to let go of it.  The peas are always good for processing stuff and see through the bullpoop. |
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Post by elaine on Oct 25, 2019 0:35:47 GMT
With the multi-page thread re: “Tough Question” being on page 1 for the past couple of days, this feels like a test/set-up. You probably don’t mean it that way, @zingermack , but many people wouldn’t touch this with a 10-ft pole right now. Was that intended for the OP (me)? Zingermack hasn't commented here.
I only posted it because it actually happened to me and it pissed me off. Talking about it helps me to let go of it.  The peas are always good for processing stuff and see through the bullpoop. Sorry, yes, you. My bad. I’ll edit. I just wanted to give you a heads up in case you don’t get as many responses as you wanted. |
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MizIndependent
Drama Llama
Quit your bullpoop.
Posts: 5,836
Jun 25, 2014 19:43:16 GMT
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Post by MizIndependent on Oct 25, 2019 2:29:26 GMT
PS. I don't see race as a reason to alter if I speak up or not. I don't look at race that way-in my eyes people are people-we are all equal. I don't mean that as far as does rasism occur? Of course it does! It's a huge problem. I never used to see race but now, given the hair-trigger sensitivity and ill-logical responses in a lot of situations like this I feel like I have to consider it. The local political atmosphere demands it. |
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Post by pierkiss on Oct 25, 2019 2:31:05 GMT
I say nothing because people are freaks and I don’t want to get killed over a standing in line argument. This situation is not worth the energy to me.
ETA: race doesn’t factor in here. I assume all people can go from 0-100 in 2 seconds over trivial things these days.
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SabrinaP
Pearl Clutcher
Busy Teacher Pea
Posts: 4,355
Location: Dallas Texas
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Post by SabrinaP on Oct 25, 2019 2:36:50 GMT
I would say anything because I try very hard not to sweat the small things. It would irate me, but I’d bite my tongue.
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Post by alexa11 on Oct 25, 2019 2:39:36 GMT
Honestly, it would depend on my mood that day and/or if I was in a hurry. That being said, I am not known for my patience... It would definitely piss me off though. I swear people are just clueless sometimes.
I forget were I was but a new register opened and the cashier said I'll take the next person in line. Of course someone from the back of the line rushed up. I told her I was next and she moved.
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ashley
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,400
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Post by ashley on Oct 25, 2019 2:40:01 GMT
I say something like, “oh, the end of the line is back there!” I like what Ashley said, but I never think quick enough or I take to long thinking of what commentary I want to say. I spent way too much time standing in long bus lines, and have had practice at this. |
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trollie
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,580
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Post by trollie on Oct 25, 2019 2:43:24 GMT
I have said something to cutters. Was in a long line at the post office one holiday season when a fellow went up to the lady in the very front of the line and asked if he could go ahead of her. "He was in a hurry." Before she could respond, I said "We are all in a hurry and you'll have to ask everyone in line if you can cut." He left.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Oct 25, 2019 2:51:22 GMT
I wouldn't have said anything, but race doesn't play into my decision. You never know who's carrying a gun, a knife, or just absolutely willing to lose their mind and beat you senseless for saying something they don't like.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 2, 2024 0:28:01 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Oct 25, 2019 3:06:03 GMT
With the multi-page thread re: “Tough Question” being on page 1 for the past couple of days, this feels like a test/set-up. You probably don’t mean it that way, @zingermack , but many people wouldn’t touch this with a 10-ft pole right now. Was that intended for the OP (me)? Zingermack hasn't commented here.
I only posted it because it actually happened to me and it pissed me off. Talking about it helps me to let go of it. The peas are always good for processing stuff and see through the bullpoop. I was so confused about why I was tagged on this one. |
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Post by elaine on Oct 25, 2019 3:36:54 GMT
Was that intended for the OP (me)? Zingermack hasn't commented here.
I only posted it because it actually happened to me and it pissed me off. Talking about it helps me to let go of it. The peas are always good for processing stuff and see through the bullpoop. I was so confused about why I was tagged on this one. I need a new brain.  Sorry for the confusion. |
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Post by ~summer~ on Oct 25, 2019 4:02:17 GMT
I’d let her go and not be upset about it.
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The peas are always good for processing stuff and see through the bullpoop.
The peas are always good for processing stuff and see through the bullpoop.
Sorry for the confusion. 