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Post by jeremysgirl on Nov 25, 2019 20:42:57 GMT
I will say that I hate giving money or gift cards. Requires zero thought and effort and because of that, requests for them make me feel like I am nothing more than an open wallet. That feeling is probably, in part, a result of the reality that when I have given people cash or gift cards at their request, I get perfunctory or no thanks which tells me straight up that I am just an open wallet for their entitlement. When the person who wants gift cards or cash wants to only GIVe those as well, I call a halt to the exchange because it's gotten down to straight up cash transactions. Might as well stop pretending our gifts mean that we care about each other and just keep our money in our own pockets I hate this too. I wish we could stop all gifting except with our immediate family. But my family insists. Jeremy's family insists. And then they all stand there and hand out gift cards and cash. It feels so damn impersonal. I can keep my cash. I just want time together. I am tired of spending and spending at Christmas. And I think I have a chip on my shoulder about it too because we are the poorest and have the most children. It feels silly to buy a gift for my dad who has everything he wants and needs. I much prefer the random, I was out shopping, found this and gave it to you in June because it reminded me of you. I see both sides really because I get that people want to give. But I also see the side of, all my needs are met and I just don't want stuff to have stuff.
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Post by Susie_Homemaker on Nov 25, 2019 20:53:39 GMT
One thing I would try would be to look the person in the face when they mention giving you a gift and saying,"Do you want to know what I *really* want? I really want you to LISTEN to me. To hear me when I said that I don't need or want anything. I love you and your thoughtfulness but your gift of LISTENING will be more than enough."
Or when asked what you did with cash or gc that were sent tell them that you donated it to 100 club or that you gave the gift card to the senior center/homeless shelter/etc. because they are really in need and you are blessed with too much stuff right now. "but thank you for your thoughtfulness and thinking of me"
Lather.Rinse.Repeat. They will figure it out eventually. If not then don't feel one bit of guilt for giving the gift away as soon as you receive it.
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Post by tuva42 on Nov 25, 2019 22:24:30 GMT
Are there places you like to go? Museums, movies, amusement parks, whatever. Could you ask for tickets/gift cards to use toward these experiences?
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