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Post by jubejubes on Jan 9, 2020 23:39:46 GMT
While I understand what you’re saying, I kind of get what the person posting that was getting at. It can be really hard for kids in particular to grasp the concept when they have never wanted for any of the basics and have never personally known anyone truly in need. I know people who went on mission trips as high school students to dig wells or build schools. They were totally overwhelmed by the incredible poverty they personally witnessed, to the point that they literally gave away all of the personal clothing that they had brought with them to wear on the trip because the people they were helping had absolutely nothing. For the people I know, it was truly a life changing experience. It’s one thing for a person of means to think you understand poverty and another thing entirely to witness it for yourself, and maybe that was what they were wanting their kids to experience. I think there’s a very fine line in these scenarios and I think people need to think very carefully about why they are volunteering and donating and which party is benefiting from it. In HS my DD went to Sri Lanka and Cambodia with Habitat fur Humanity. None of the students had any idea about construction and the tools they were given were virtually useless. On reflection we think the money spent on flights, food, accommodation, teacher chaperones, etc would have been far better spent buying quality tools and hiring local construction workers. But hey, it boosted her college application.Same goes for a couple of her HS junior friends who went to volunteer in a maternity hospital in Africa for a summer to add to their college application. Neither had any experience at all. Money would have been better spent on providing a local woman with midwife training. And don’t even get me started on mission trips.... FYI -- I have bolded muggins post. WOW -- going to a 3rd world country, without any skills, spending $$ to BOOST a college application. Talk about privilege! Really, a very fine line between what Felicity Huffman did and what is described above, the monetary part. Spending $$ so that your child can go to a poor country, not know what they are doing and in return, boosting their college application, and the mom seems to have some pride about this adventure. Perhaps you, muggins, should have thought a bit more carefully about who was the true benefactor in this situation. No thought given about the actual people that these kids are supposed to be 'helping'. As mentioned below, these people are not in a Zoo. The people who need it in my town are the parents. We had someone post to our town FB page recently that they were looking for charity opportunities where their child could actually give the things to the people in need so they would appreciate what they have. I had to sit on my hands and not type: "Holy shit, they aren't ZOO ANIMALS!" Yes, I do know what real poverty looks like. I have walked in those shoes, blisters and all. I do volunteer at our Out of the Cold, Into the Heat programmes and other activities, year round, not just when or where there is an opportunity to "pat myself on the back" for doing so, or to boost a college application form. The mission trips that I have supported have people that live year-round with the impoverished. There is communication about what is needed and what isn't. Volunteers sleep in the tents, eat the same food as the locals and integrate into the community. This has been happening since 2001. We bring hockey bags full of needed stuff, fly in a cheaper airline to get there and are aware of the landscape prior to leaving home. We become a community, together. And to answer a question not asked as of yet, there are no Bible studies that require attendance prior to receiving our support. We work together and show the locals how a Christian acts, talks and works. Yes, there is a biblical part to these trips, but this is in conjunction with the local church. Again, we know the people and the landscape prior to coming and we go several times a year to the same area and branching out to other communities. IT is a hand-up and not a hand-out.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jan 10, 2020 2:01:28 GMT
I think there’s a very fine line in these scenarios and I think people need to think very carefully about why they are volunteering and donating and which party is benefiting from it. In HS my DD went to Sri Lanka and Cambodia with Habitat fur Humanity. None of the students had any idea about construction and the tools they were given were virtually useless. On reflection we think the money spent on flights, food, accommodation, teacher chaperones, etc would have been far better spent buying quality tools and hiring local construction workers. But hey, it boosted her college application. Same goes for a couple of her HS junior friends who went to volunteer in a maternity hospital in Africa for a summer to add to their college application. Neither had any experience at all. Money would have been better spent on providing a local woman with midwife training. And don’t even get me started on mission trips.... I can appreciate what you’re saying but I think you totally missed my point which was that the people I personally know, when they came face to face with true poverty, felt compelled to literally leave their own clothes out of their personal suitcases with the people they met when they were serving. This wasn’t anything they went there planning to do. They realized just how good they actually have it that they could leave everything they brought and still have a closet full of stuff at home. I agree with you completely that the situations you noted could have been handled in a much more efficient manner and the money spent could have been better implemented. But that doesn’t mean that no good ever comes of people going out in the world to help others. I think even if the experience opens an otherwise clueless person’s eyes to the dire reality of other people’s life situations and it makes that person a more compassionate human being overall as a result, then some good was done.
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muggins
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,861
Jul 30, 2017 3:38:57 GMT
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Post by muggins on Jan 10, 2020 2:50:43 GMT
I think there’s a very fine line in these scenarios and I think people need to think very carefully about why they are volunteering and donating and which party is benefiting from it. In HS my DD went to Sri Lanka and Cambodia with Habitat fur Humanity. None of the students had any idea about construction and the tools they were given were virtually useless. On reflection we think the money spent on flights, food, accommodation, teacher chaperones, etc would have been far better spent buying quality tools and hiring local construction workers. But hey, it boosted her college application. Same goes for a couple of her HS junior friends who went to volunteer in a maternity hospital in Africa for a summer to add to their college application. Neither had any experience at all. Money would have been better spent on providing a local woman with midwife training. And don’t even get me started on mission trips.... I can appreciate what you’re saying but I think you totally missed my point which was that the people I personally know, when they came face to face with true poverty, felt compelled to literally leave their own clothes out of their personal suitcases with the people they met when they were serving. This wasn’t anything they went there planning to do. They realized just how good they actually have it that they could leave everything they brought and still have a closet full of stuff at home. I agree with you completely that the situations you noted could have been handled in a much more efficient manner and the money spent could have been better implemented. But that doesn’t mean that no good ever comes of people going out in the world to help others. I think even if the experience opens an otherwise clueless person’s eyes to the dire reality of other people’s life situations and it makes that person a more compassionate human being overall as a result, then some good was done. I didn’t miss your point at all. I understand completely what happened. When DH and I went to Greece to work with refugees, we left all our clothes and toiletries with them and came home with empty suitcases. Same with DD and her classmates in Sri Lanka. Every day while they were working, the local children would skip school to come and watch them. The students put all their extra money together and spent it on school supplies and escorted the children back to the local school. I fully believe that going out into the word to help others is important and can lead to a better understanding of how others live. I have since given many lectures on my time volunteering with refugees. But, not every ‘mission trip’ benefits the people who are struggling.
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muggins
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,861
Jul 30, 2017 3:38:57 GMT
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Post by muggins on Jan 10, 2020 3:18:20 GMT
I think there’s a very fine line in these scenarios and I think people need to think very carefully about why they are volunteering and donating and which party is benefiting from it. In HS my DD went to Sri Lanka and Cambodia with Habitat fur Humanity. None of the students had any idea about construction and the tools they were given were virtually useless. On reflection we think the money spent on flights, food, accommodation, teacher chaperones, etc would have been far better spent buying quality tools and hiring local construction workers. But hey, it boosted her college application.Same goes for a couple of her HS junior friends who went to volunteer in a maternity hospital in Africa for a summer to add to their college application. Neither had any experience at all. Money would have been better spent on providing a local woman with midwife training. And don’t even get me started on mission trips.... FYI -- I have bolded muggins post. WOW -- going to a 3rd world country, without any skills, spending $$ to BOOST a college application. Talk about privilege! Really, a very fine line between what Felicity Huffman did and what is described above, the monetary part. Spending $$ so that your child can go to a poor country, not know what they are doing and in return, boosting their college application, and the mom seems to have some pride about this adventure. Perhaps you, muggins, should have thought a bit more carefully about who was the true benefactor in this situation. No thought given about the actual people that these kids are supposed to be 'helping'. As mentioned below, these people are not in a Zoo. The people who need it in my town are the parents. We had someone post to our town FB page recently that they were looking for charity opportunities where their child could actually give the things to the people in need so they would appreciate what they have. I had to sit on my hands and not type: "Holy shit, they aren't ZOO ANIMALS!" Yes, I do know what real poverty looks like. I have walked in those shoes, blisters and all. I do volunteer at our Out of the Cold, Into the Heat programmes and other activities, year round, not just when or where there is an opportunity to "pat myself on the back" for doing so, or to boost a college application form. The mission trips that I have supported have people that live year-round with the impoverished. There is communication about what is needed and what isn't. Volunteers sleep in the tents, eat the same food as the locals and integrate into the community. This has been happening since 2001. We bring hockey bags full of needed stuff, fly in a cheaper airline to get there and are aware of the landscape prior to leaving home. We become a community, together. And to answer a question not asked as of yet, there are no Bible studies that require attendance prior to receiving our support. We work together and show the locals how a Christian acts, talks and works. Yes, there is a biblical part to these trips, but this is in conjunction with the local church. Again, we know the people and the landscape prior to coming and we go several times a year to the same area and branching out to other communities. IT is a hand-up and not a hand-out. Although you’re trying to be insulting, I agree with you. When my daughter told me she was interested in volunteering for Habitat for Humanity through her school, we allowed her to go, because we were lead to believe it would be beneficial to the locals and she would be providing a service to them. After hearing what happened on the trips ( lack of tools, no proper direction or teaching) and doing more research online about these kind of volunteer opportunities for young, unskilled teens, we decided that our money would have been better spent donating directly to local organisations in those countries. We made the wrong decision to send her which is why we now think and research more carefully about the best way to benefit those in need. After rereading my post I realise the last phrase ‘But hey, it boosted her collage application’ would be read as obnoxious, dismissive, and privileged. It wasn’t, it was badly worded sarcasm. Equating a student listing voluntary work that they actually did on a college application to Felicity Huffman’s actions is not the same.
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kelly8875
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,407
Location: Lost in my supplies...
Oct 26, 2014 17:02:56 GMT
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Post by kelly8875 on Jan 10, 2020 3:30:51 GMT
FYI -- I have bolded muggins post. WOW -- going to a 3rd world country, without any skills, spending $$ to BOOST a college application. Talk about privilege! Really, a very fine line between what Felicity Huffman did and what is described above, the monetary part. Spending $$ so that your child can go to a poor country, not know what they are doing and in return, boosting their college application, and the mom seems to have some pride about this adventure. Perhaps you, muggins, should have thought a bit more carefully about who was the true benefactor in this situation. No thought given about the actual people that these kids are supposed to be 'helping'. As mentioned below, these people are not in a Zoo. Yes, I do know what real poverty looks like. I have walked in those shoes, blisters and all. I do volunteer at our Out of the Cold, Into the Heat programmes and other activities, year round, not just when or where there is an opportunity to "pat myself on the back" for doing so, or to boost a college application form. The mission trips that I have supported have people that live year-round with the impoverished. There is communication about what is needed and what isn't. Volunteers sleep in the tents, eat the same food as the locals and integrate into the community. This has been happening since 2001. We bring hockey bags full of needed stuff, fly in a cheaper airline to get there and are aware of the landscape prior to leaving home. We become a community, together. And to answer a question not asked as of yet, there are no Bible studies that require attendance prior to receiving our support. We work together and show the locals how a Christian acts, talks and works. Yes, there is a biblical part to these trips, but this is in conjunction with the local church. Again, we know the people and the landscape prior to coming and we go several times a year to the same area and branching out to other communities. IT is a hand-up and not a hand-out. Although you’re trying to be insulting, I agree with you. When my daughter told me she was interested in volunteering for Habitat for Humanity through her school, we allowed her to go, because we were lead to believe it would be beneficial to the locals and she would be providing a service to them. After hearing what happened on the trips ( lack of tools, no proper direction or teaching) and doing more research online about these kind of volunteer opportunities for young, unskilled teens, we decided that our money would have been better spent donating directly to local organisations in those countries. We made the wrong decision to send her which is why we now think and research more carefully about the best way to benefit those in need. Equating a student listing voluntary work that they actually did on a college application to Felicity Huffman’s actions is stupid. It’s not remotely the same. Very honest question.... Why not help the Habitat for Humanity in your own communities? Why not volunteer for these same type of events at home? There is a serious need at home. And helping at home will help the volunteers realize it is directly under foot. It is real here. I’m really just asking because I’ve seen and known many people doing abroad mission work, but I know many of these kids and adults don’t believe it’s at home. People who can’t take their baby to the doctor, or they have to wait for hours at the free clinic. Kids/families sleeping on the floor without blankets. Families rummaging at Goodwill drop boxes for free clothes at night. Families sneaking into run down homes at night for a dry place to sleep. Families going to the local gas station/McDonald’s/grocery store to use a working toilet, or wash hands/bathe. This is all here. This is what people need to see and help with.
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Post by FuzzyMutt on Jan 10, 2020 6:04:42 GMT
My sister.. white. Actually has a 4 year degree from a well known school. “Only” two children at 36.. managed to look put together in public because she knows how to hustle (couponing was her only household income for over a years. Buying crap super cheap and reselling really cheap.
She had a 2 year old (and a 17 year old) in her house and the water got shut off for 3 months! She never told anyone- even knowing my parents or I would pay the bill so she could get water. But no. She refilled containers at the laundromat so they could flush toilet and was in warmed water on the stove.
Do y’all think about having water to your house? Ever?
She refuses to ask for help. And you know what, we’ve swerved to talk about 3rd world countries. I’m still talking about right here in the USA (humor me international folks- a lot of us don’t want to recognize that our neighbors are food insecure or dealing with medications/ utilities or some combination of all of those above.)
Another pea asked do I have a better suggestion? Notice the teen that works a bunch of hours so “they can afford a damn prom dress.” Then doesn’t go to the prom because “it’s stupid.”
Who doesn’t “know what they want to do.” Because they likely have no options. This is the place to help if you can. A hand up if you will. When I graduated (valedictorian if I had better attendance - hey Burger King!) I didn’t even know scholarships and grants existed!! 100% true, I swear- I didn’t know student loans existed. I graduated in a shit hole town in a shit hole state and had no damn clue. Not a single guidance counselor spoke to me about it. 4.2 GPA yall. They even pronounced my name wrong at graduation. Lol I’m sure if I had paid sports fees and activities fees and my parents shown up at the school once in 4 years they may have gotten it right.
I could go on and on. Suggestions sug? Read between the lines. A little mentor ship goes a long way. I managed to dig myself out. Veteran. 2 4 year degrees. Pretty great job and a pretty decent life. Funny thing though. In the last 12 years I have made smaller and smaller bonuses and less and less overtime. My income has eroded. I used to grasp at and “be middle class” (whatever that is) Between health care skyrocketing, education for my son (still working that out.. since divorce assumes 18 year old is 100% in the world on his own) I find myself sliding.
Truth is though. I’m alright. I’m still light years ahead of the folks left behind. Go ahead. Buy a binder for a third world person. It’s kind and thoughtful and hey! You can feel great about yourself! Go you!!!! At the end of the day, folks looking to curate an Insta moment or a formulated give back will be happy. They’ll find it and they can glorify in it. But just know at the end of the day, until it’s real, it’s not real.
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