Post by ktdoesntscrap on Oct 21, 2014 17:38:20 GMT
I just got a call from the school counselor. My daughter is still at school so I haven't heard from her yet.
(Back story... my dd is in 6th grade. I moved her from her small private school, that she loved. It has an amazing environment, but small 120 kids pre-school to 8th grade. But they weren't so great at teaching things like MATH. So for the last two years I have worked my ass off to get a new charter and middle school going. I want my child to be in a school with a great environment and that does a great job of teaching! especially Math.
My daughter has some learning issues, and has Non Verbal Learning disability, that can make interactions with peers tough for her. She was very excited to go to the new school but by about 3 weeks in was having issues sleeping, was sleeping with me most nights. Talking like she might be experiencing some depression. She didn't know what was bothering her... eventually she said she didn't like school and wanted to go back to her old school. She didn't have friends, etc. Her BFF is at her old school.
She has about 7 or 8 girls who she is friends with who are at her new school, one of them is in class with her, and she has made a few other friends... been invited to a birthday party, her friends and teachers say she is sociable and liked by her peers)
Today. The call I get is from the counselor, who she has seen previously to talk through some of the peer anxiety and depression. She is really a bubbly happy kid 95% of the time. The teachers all are surprised when I say she is unhappy and wants to leave the school.
The counselor said that she came to her, distraught at lunch time, apparently a girl in her class,lets call her bully girl was telling all the other girls that my dd is stupid, and that no one likes her, and that they shouldn't be friends with her. So no one even the girl who she has been friends with her since 2nd grade would speak to her. Finally one of the girls told my daughter what was going on. She begged her not to tell a teacher or the bully girl would get mad at them.
Well my dd did tell the counselor, who said she was beside herself she didn't know what to do or want to go back to class, she also begged the counselor not to talk to the bully girl. But the counselor did, the girl admitted she had done what DD said, and that she had been in trouble at her last school for doing the same thing.
I will of course talk to my child when she gets home and hear what happened from her. The counselor suggested getting all the girls together to work on friendships, and how to speak up for yourself, and what it means to be a friend. Which I am all for. I understand the bully girl is doing this for a reason, and has her own issues. This is the second time something like this has happened. A few weeks ago a boy turned and yelled at my daughter, according to the teacher and others there completely unprovoked, he said she was a stupid, (some slang word that escapes me at the moment), and she had no friends and she was a stuck up snob. He apologized and I was told he really meant it. My daughter was upset but quickly got over it because she said it stung but was weird because she never had really interacted with this kid.
So I am worried that now my dd may be or become the victim. This may just cement her desire and make her want to go back to her old school more.
What would you expect the school to do?
What would you want the school to do?
After you talked to your child what is the message you would want them to hear from you?
I have written a novel. I am just trying to process what I will say to my girl when she gets home.
Thanks to anyone who read it all.
(Back story... my dd is in 6th grade. I moved her from her small private school, that she loved. It has an amazing environment, but small 120 kids pre-school to 8th grade. But they weren't so great at teaching things like MATH. So for the last two years I have worked my ass off to get a new charter and middle school going. I want my child to be in a school with a great environment and that does a great job of teaching! especially Math.
My daughter has some learning issues, and has Non Verbal Learning disability, that can make interactions with peers tough for her. She was very excited to go to the new school but by about 3 weeks in was having issues sleeping, was sleeping with me most nights. Talking like she might be experiencing some depression. She didn't know what was bothering her... eventually she said she didn't like school and wanted to go back to her old school. She didn't have friends, etc. Her BFF is at her old school.
She has about 7 or 8 girls who she is friends with who are at her new school, one of them is in class with her, and she has made a few other friends... been invited to a birthday party, her friends and teachers say she is sociable and liked by her peers)
Today. The call I get is from the counselor, who she has seen previously to talk through some of the peer anxiety and depression. She is really a bubbly happy kid 95% of the time. The teachers all are surprised when I say she is unhappy and wants to leave the school.
The counselor said that she came to her, distraught at lunch time, apparently a girl in her class,lets call her bully girl was telling all the other girls that my dd is stupid, and that no one likes her, and that they shouldn't be friends with her. So no one even the girl who she has been friends with her since 2nd grade would speak to her. Finally one of the girls told my daughter what was going on. She begged her not to tell a teacher or the bully girl would get mad at them.
Well my dd did tell the counselor, who said she was beside herself she didn't know what to do or want to go back to class, she also begged the counselor not to talk to the bully girl. But the counselor did, the girl admitted she had done what DD said, and that she had been in trouble at her last school for doing the same thing.
I will of course talk to my child when she gets home and hear what happened from her. The counselor suggested getting all the girls together to work on friendships, and how to speak up for yourself, and what it means to be a friend. Which I am all for. I understand the bully girl is doing this for a reason, and has her own issues. This is the second time something like this has happened. A few weeks ago a boy turned and yelled at my daughter, according to the teacher and others there completely unprovoked, he said she was a stupid, (some slang word that escapes me at the moment), and she had no friends and she was a stuck up snob. He apologized and I was told he really meant it. My daughter was upset but quickly got over it because she said it stung but was weird because she never had really interacted with this kid.
So I am worried that now my dd may be or become the victim. This may just cement her desire and make her want to go back to her old school more.
What would you expect the school to do?
What would you want the school to do?
After you talked to your child what is the message you would want them to hear from you?
I have written a novel. I am just trying to process what I will say to my girl when she gets home.
Thanks to anyone who read it all.
