Deleted
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Aug 18, 2025 20:17:58 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2020 14:44:11 GMT
"A priest "kicked out" a 7-year-old boy who has autism for being a "distraction," according to the child's mother and a video capturing the incident, which she posted to her Facebook page. "It was shocking to say the least," Julia Vicidomini, the boy's mother, told NBC News. "We're still hurt and upset about it, and it shows there is still much to be done to educate others of those with disabilities." Vicidomini said she and her family members attended Christ the King Church in Hillside, New Jersey, on Saturday for the baptism of her daughter, Sofia. Vicidomini, 38, said she'd been attending the Roman Catholic church since she was a child and that her two other children, Nicholas and Christopher, 16, had been baptized there. "We just wanted Nicholas to be part of the celebration," Vicidomini said, adding that she did not disclose that he had autism because she didn't think it was necessary as the ceremony was a private family event. During the ceremony, Nicholas, who finds comfort in bringing toys to public places, was playing in a candle room adjacent to the baptism, Vicidomini said. He dropped a toy and it clattered on the floor, upon which the Rev. Luke Duc Tran, the priest leading the ceremony, instructed Nicholas to leave. "Out," the priest said, according to a video posted to Vicidomini's Facebook page. "This church is not for play."" www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/mother-says-son-autism-was-kicked-out-church-priest-n1236450"The pastor was unaware that the sibling playing in a nearby candle room during the ceremony has autism," the statement read. " The pastor did not understand the child’s behavior, he felt unprepared to respond appropriately, and his reaction to the situation was not pastoral."
Perhaps the pastor could have asked about it before going directly to "Out"? Perhaps the priest is woefully unsuited to a situation where children of all temperaments will be in attendance?
Perhaps pastors and priests need a little more training in humanity and the wide variation therein? Perhaps the kind of training teachers have been getting for decades? If his knowledge and preparedness are lacking, perhaps the church needs to use these incidents to examine its practices and trainings? |
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peaname
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by peaname on Aug 15, 2020 15:08:30 GMT
Wow. Did he miss the part in Luke where Jesus specifically says let the little children come to me?
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Post by chances on Aug 15, 2020 16:42:52 GMT
That must have felt awful for the little boy and the family. It's a reminder to me how necessary it is to pause, take a breath, and talk to ppl/ ask questions. It's way too easy to go from 0 to 100 when you think you're in the right.
I dont understand why the headline had to be written in a purposefully misleading way. It's written as though the priest paused mass and told the child to leave.
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Post by maryland on Aug 15, 2020 16:50:41 GMT
It says it's a private family event, so maybe just the priest, parents and siblings. So I don't understand why the priest did that!
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SweetieBsMom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,926
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Post by SweetieBsMom on Aug 15, 2020 16:52:53 GMT
I grew up Catholic. 12 years of catholic school. When my DS was born he was baptized. We had a childrens bible we used to read at night. Then it came time for religious education for first communion. In our town we had to make an appointment with the woman who ran the program and the Parrish priest. I told them he was autistic and struggled with the concepts. I, basically, was told “he can’t participate”. I was already 85% out of the church due to the scandals but DS’s grandparents where pushing that he needed to make his first communion and confirmation. After that comment, very Christian, right? I was 100% out of the church. They were so incredibly rude to me, that it p*sses me off to this day.
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Post by christine58 on Aug 15, 2020 16:58:09 GMT
Vicidomini said she and her family members attended Christ the King Church in Hillside, New Jersey, on Saturday for the baptism of her daughter, Sofia. |
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wellway
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,203
Jun 25, 2014 20:50:09 GMT
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Post by wellway on Aug 15, 2020 17:06:46 GMT
This was their parish church for years and their priest, yes? So why was the seven year old child unknown to him?
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Aug 18, 2025 20:17:58 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2020 17:35:40 GMT
I grew up Catholic. 12 years of catholic school. When my DS was born he was baptized. We had a childrens bible we used to read at night. Then it came time for religious education for first communion. In our town we had to make an appointment with the woman who ran the program and the Parrish priest. I told them he was autistic and struggled with the concepts. I, basically, was told “he can’t participate”. I was already 85% out of the church due to the scandals but DS’s grandparents where pushing that he needed to make his first communion and confirmation. After that comment, very Christian, right? I was 100% out of the church. They were so incredibly rude to me, that it p*sses me off to this day. I'm sorry. I was way out of the church by my young 20s. But I will never forget the Catholic priest at my dad's funeral mass not allowing a eulogy to be read in church. That pisses me off to this day. Many of my mom's friends came to the mass, but not to the grave, so heard NOTHING about my dad's life (he wasn't known to the community as they moved to that area when he was already fairly housebound). |
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Post by Darcy Collins on Aug 15, 2020 18:11:04 GMT
It says it's a private family event, so maybe just the priest, parents and siblings. So I don't understand why the priest did that! It's hard to say - many, many Catholic baptisms involve multiple families and guests, so while it is not mass and a private event, it can involve a rather larger audience. I'm not justifying the priest's actions, just explaining that I would absolutely not assume a baptism only involved the priest, parents and siblings - and actually the article says the MIL left the church with the son - so there were certainly others in attendance. ETA this article is much more clear that it was only a few members of the family and I'm assuming the godparents in attendance - looks like the MIL was available to Nicholas if there were any issues. www.foxcarolina.com/video-7-year-old-boy-with-autism-kicked-out-of-church-during-sisters-baptism/article_16ef1ceb-fb23-54a9-8c7f-f71aa00fa540.html |
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SabrinaP
Pearl Clutcher
Busy Teacher Pea
Posts: 4,467
Location: Dallas Texas
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Post by SabrinaP on Aug 15, 2020 18:57:44 GMT
This was their parish church for years and their priest, yes? So why was the seven year old child unknown to him? Priests change regularly, so it could be a fairly new priest. The church might be extremely large. There may be multiple priests at the church, and the one doing the baptism was not the one they usually go to for mass. She may have been born and raised in the church, but doesn't go every Sunday. ETA: I'm not excusing the priest in any way, just saying he really may not have known. This is definitely a good reminder to not judge and realize all kids/adults do not act the way we act or the way we expect them to and there may be a very good reason for that. |
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Post by paulao on Aug 15, 2020 18:59:02 GMT
The Catholic Church is so fucked up.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Aug 15, 2020 20:35:13 GMT
Well, of course he did!
I'm sure the priest asked himself, "WWJD?" and banishing a young child (whether one with challenges or not) was the very first answer that came to his heart.
Awful!
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Post by maryland on Aug 15, 2020 21:21:45 GMT
It says it's a private family event, so maybe just the priest, parents and siblings. So I don't understand why the priest did that! It's hard to say - many, many Catholic baptisms involve multiple families and guests, so while it is not mass and a private event, it can involve a rather larger audience. I'm not justifying the priest's actions, just explaining that I would absolutely not assume a baptism only involved the priest, parents and siblings - and actually the article says the MIL left the church with the son - so there were certainly others in attendance. ETA this article is much more clear that it was only a few members of the family and I'm assuming the godparents in attendance - looks like the MIL was available to Nicholas if there were any issues. www.foxcarolina.com/video-7-year-old-boy-with-autism-kicked-out-of-church-during-sisters-baptism/article_16ef1ceb-fb23-54a9-8c7f-f71aa00fa540.htmlTrue, but not just Catholic baptisms, Protestant baptisms too involve many friends and family of the baby being baptised. I was just thinking because of possible covid restrictions, they may have been limited to just the immediate family. I guess that depends on where you live, some states may not have restrictions on how many people can be at an indoor location. I admit, I didn't pay any attention to the location. |
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Post by Basket1lady on Aug 15, 2020 23:11:39 GMT
Cradle Catholic here. This attitude was inexcusable and was handled poorly.
The Church has clear guidelines for those with mental or physical disabilities to participate in daily Catholic life and the sacraments. For the profoundly disabled, Sacramental classes are usually a separate program and may be run by the diocese vs a parish church. But when possible, the faithful are integrated into the parish’s classes. There was one boy in DS’s confirmation class with Down’s Syndrome. He didn’t attend all the classes, but DS was his buddy for the actual Confirmation.
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Post by pierkiss on Aug 16, 2020 2:37:05 GMT
Not surprising.
My nephew has autism. (He’s also a genius). He got kicked out of 1st communion class because he had questions about God that the teacher was unprepared to answer. She complained to the priests, and they opted to dismiss him from the program.
My kid with autism made it through 1st communion. There was one moment during rehearsal where I thought the priest might say he wasn’t ready, but he made it through.
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