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Post by iamkristinl16 on Aug 22, 2020 22:48:35 GMT
My oldest (17yo) has a baseball event in the twin cities tomorrow morning at 8:00. One of his other friends is also going. Dh think I should take them rather them driving themselves. I have mixed feelings. On one hand, I don’t really want to get up that early and just sit in my car for hours on end. And my other son has a baseball game at noon. But on the other hand, I’m a little nervous about them driving themselves. Curious what other people would do, although obviously we will make the decision.
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johnnysmom
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,682
Jun 25, 2014 21:16:33 GMT
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Post by johnnysmom on Aug 22, 2020 22:51:31 GMT
I’d probably let them drive if you’d just be sitting in the car. But a few things to consider: how far away is it? Has he driven in city traffic before? Does he know where he’s going?
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Deleted
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Jul 8, 2024 22:57:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 22, 2020 22:52:06 GMT
Where are you in relation to the cities? Would they be able to stick to 35, or would they need to be driving a two lane most of the way? Or 94?
I guess I would be pretty nervous, but then my 17 year old just finished online drivers ed and no behind the wheel right now.
If you came with, you could maybe do some "in the cities" stuff if you needed to, for me that is stocking up on vegan food from Herbevorious Butcher, lol.
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Post by Zee on Aug 22, 2020 22:53:11 GMT
At 17, I'm ok with them driving themselves if you think they're responsible enough.
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Post by padresfan619 on Aug 22, 2020 22:55:43 GMT
I would let them drive themselves, they’re close to being out of the nest and off to college, give them that trust and independence. I would go along the route on google maps together so he knows generally what to expect. I’ve been driving for a long time and I still check out the parking situation of new places I’m headed to beforehand to ease my parking anxiety.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jul 8, 2024 22:57:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 22, 2020 22:56:28 GMT
Wanted to add, you could also maybe stop at Pine City Scrapbooking Company if you drive thru Pine City on your way home!  |
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Post by freecharlie on Aug 22, 2020 22:59:43 GMT
I don't know how bad the traffic/roads are, but I'd probably let them drive.
Do they have life 360 or something similar?
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Post by epeanymous on Aug 22, 2020 22:59:51 GMT
We all have our things. I think it is reasonable in that situation to let the teens drive (and I did at that age), but our house rule is that the teens can't drive other teens until they are 18 (we have OK public transit here which helps).
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used2scrap
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,040 
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Post by used2scrap on Aug 22, 2020 23:06:39 GMT
As much as I didn’t want to, I said yes to every request like that my son made at 17. I figured in a year he’d be away at school and I wouldn’t even be getting a vote anymore on his daily activities and whereabouts, so we needed the practice in smaller bites. It was very very difficult though!
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jul 8, 2024 22:57:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 22, 2020 23:08:32 GMT
Traffic should be light that early on a Sunday. If they have to take 94 through Rogers/Maple Grove talk to them about really watching the narrow construction lanes that weave around a bit and to leave plenty of following distance. If it were me I'd be torn but probably let my kids drive themselves.
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Aug 22, 2020 23:15:56 GMT
I’m not sure exactly where they need to go. It is in St Paul but I need to check the exact location and how difficult it is to get to.
They would be taking interstate 94 for the most part. It is about 80 miles.
My son has not driven in the cities. He hasn’t really driven out of town for that matter. I’m not sure about the other boy. I believe if I didn’t take them, the other boy would be driving.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jul 8, 2024 22:57:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 22, 2020 23:22:37 GMT
That answers it for me. I would be driving or be in the car with them while my son at least got the practice.
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Post by cindyupnorth on Aug 22, 2020 23:32:49 GMT
I’m not sure exactly where they need to go. It is in St Paul but I need to check the exact location and how difficult it is to get to. They would be taking interstate 94 for the most part. It is about 80 miles. My son has not driven in the cities. He hasn’t really driven out of town for that matter. I’m not sure about the other boy. I believe if I didn’t take them, the other boy would be driving. ahhh. Hell no. esp with his driving history. I'm sort of jaded though with what happened to my cousins kids on 94. I would drive them. Drop them off and go do something. Find out where in St paul. You could possibly take hwy 10 in also, depending on location. But no way would I let my son who is 17 drive on a freeway without an adult for the 1st time. |
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Post by maryland on Aug 23, 2020 1:22:05 GMT
Have they driven on highways or in the city before? How far is it? That would help me decide whether to let them drive. If they have a lot of experience making that trip, I would be fine. My husband is so lenient, letting our daughters drive everywhere, I am on the cautious side.
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pancakes
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,993
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Post by pancakes on Aug 23, 2020 1:53:07 GMT
I’d drive him. I wouldn’t know if I could trust the other kid and I think your son, based on your description, needs a little more practice.
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ellen
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,581
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Post by ellen on Aug 23, 2020 1:55:12 GMT
I would not let my 17 year old do that yet. She has very limited driving experience in that kind of traffic. I'd probably have her be the driver on the way home so she could practice.
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Post by christine58 on Aug 23, 2020 1:58:33 GMT
My oldest (17yo) has a baseball event in the twin cities tomorrow morning at 8:00. One of his other friends is also going. Dh think I should take them rather them driving themselves. I have mixed feelings. On one hand, I don’t really want to get up that early and just sit in my car for hours on end. And my other son has a baseball game at noon. But on the other hand, I’m a little nervous about them driving themselves. Curious what other people would do, although obviously we will make the decision. Drive them. |
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Deleted
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Jul 8, 2024 22:57:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 23, 2020 2:00:14 GMT
I would let them drive. My DD17 finally got her license and it’s so nice. I have Life 360 so I always know where she is. She has also been very good about curfew. Always comes home early.
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Post by ~summer~ on Aug 23, 2020 2:11:55 GMT
How far of a drive it is? I’m a nervous nelly when it comes to driving so I would drive them.
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Post by huskermom98 on Aug 23, 2020 2:18:24 GMT
Some of it might depend on the other kid, how much experience he has in the city (maybe how his parents feel about it too). This might be a good opportunity to let him drive since its a Sunday, but with you in the car.
I had my son driving on the interstate & freeway in town as soon as possible because I have heard of so many kids (and adults) that are scared to...and its not like we're in a huge city like the Twin Cities.
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Post by iamkristinl16 on Aug 23, 2020 3:18:59 GMT
I'm just going to take them. I was talking to someone else who brought up construction as well so that makes it even more stressful.
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Post by Lori McMud on Aug 23, 2020 4:55:40 GMT
I drive in the cities almost everyday (to go to work). Since the virus crap has been a factor, traffic has been very light.
It might be a good time to do as someone suggested above, have him drive with you riding with so he can get some experience.
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Post by Basket1lady on Aug 23, 2020 9:57:56 GMT
I’d take them. I definitely would have have him drive on a freeway for the first time alone. And then I’d take your DS driving on 94 another day. He really needs to be driving you everywhere. If he’s in the car, he’s driving. He has to learn at some point.
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peaname
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,390
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Post by peaname on Aug 23, 2020 10:46:28 GMT
I think you made the right decision. It’s not age, it’s highway experience. I knew a thirty year old who cannot drive on highways because of a scary situation when she was a new driver. In the Boston area, this majorly effected her life.
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StephDRebel
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,669
Location: Ohio
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Post by StephDRebel on Aug 23, 2020 11:52:00 GMT
Barring any crazy changes from the norm I would let them drive.
Less than a year from 18, they should be figuring things out.
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,706
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Aug 23, 2020 12:09:19 GMT
Glad to hear you're taking them. I wouldn't allow my kid to drive 80 miles into an unknown area requiring driving skills they don't have.
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Post by mikklynn on Aug 23, 2020 12:17:06 GMT
I’m not sure exactly where they need to go. It is in St Paul but I need to check the exact location and how difficult it is to get to. They would be taking interstate 94 for the most part. It is about 80 miles. My son has not driven in the cities. He hasn’t really driven out of town for that matter. I’m not sure about the other boy. I believe if I didn’t take them, the other boy would be driving. Because your DS has not driven in the city, I would take them. BUT, I would have your son drive, so he gains experience with you to help out. 94 is not the road to have him try on his own. |
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iowgirl
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,194
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Post by iowgirl on Aug 23, 2020 13:02:11 GMT
My son has not driven in the cities. He hasn’t really driven out of town for that matter. I’m not sure about the other boy. I believe if I didn’t take them, the other boy would be driving. Because your DS has not driven in the city, I would take them. BUT, I would have your son drive, so he gains experience with you to help out. 94 is not the road to have him try on his own. This! It is so important to have them get driving experience! You go along, but have him behind the wheel for the entire trip. I was ready to say let him drive, but if he has not had any experience with this type of driving, I would be hesitant. We live in a very rural area. VERY rural. So my kids learned to drive at a really young age (14 legally, ) .. they did not have urban driving experience. We don't travel to a city very often, so when we did I made sure they drove. And I started out on quieter times, but did get them driving during heavier traffic times and weather events also, if we could. This is so important! Might be a pain in the butt for your schedule, but take this time to use it to teach him. |
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Post by ScrapbookMyLife on Aug 23, 2020 15:04:10 GMT
Since he is an inexperienced driver, I would accompany him this time. Let him do the driving and navigating. If he is not doing well, you can take over.
Also watch for his responsibility skills as the driver.
Is is keeping an eye on fuel gauge?
Now would be a good time to teach him, check the air in tires, oil level check, etc... All the basic things that are done before departing for a longer distance drive.
How is he handling paying for the gas in regards to friend hitching a ride with him?
How is he handling stopping for a beverage, lunch, etc?
He is in the transitional stage from teenager to adult.
He learns, you teach and guide. It's a fine line, between letting go and hanging on. Experience is gained by doing. Let him drive, with you beside him.
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Post by worrywart on Aug 23, 2020 15:17:00 GMT
That distance, I would take him or let him drive with me in the car. It can be overwhelming to a newer driver on highways and no telling what types of construction or incidents he would encounter on the way.
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