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Post by epeanymous on Jan 5, 2021 17:58:34 GMT
Encouraging resilience doesn’t mean denying feelings. It means we say, “This sucks! We’re sad! We are giving up a lot of fun things that were important to us, but we’re doing it because being healthy and responsible is more important right now. So it’s ok to be sad... but we’re also going to be strong, and be proud that we’re making responsible choices, and get through this.” I will say, part of my irritation is that I am doing this and if I say, this sucks, there are people out there committed to insisting that it doesn’t, really. My kids saw their grandparents at least twice a week before — now, we see them maybe once a month for a short period socially distanced with masks outside. My five-year-old has no friends because it’s hard to make friends as a kindergarten student who has only been online. My high schooler has developed anxiety. I can say that we are making the right decisions while still acknowledging that this has a real cost for kids, and all the yelling at me about “resilience” doesn’t change the fact that my kids will survive this and they laugh every day but this totally blows. |
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Post by miominmio on Jan 5, 2021 18:08:45 GMT
So the premise is that children has made it through other crises....but not all did. I had relatives who were children and teenagers during WW2, and they most certainly experienced trauma that affected them forever. The difference might just be that we now are aware that a crisis might have lasting effect on children.
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ashley
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by ashley on Jan 5, 2021 18:13:50 GMT
Encouraging resilience doesn’t mean denying feelings. It means we say, “This sucks! We’re sad! We are giving up a lot of fun things that were important to us, but we’re doing it because being healthy and responsible is more important right now. So it’s ok to be sad... but we’re also going to be strong, and be proud that we’re making responsible choices, and get through this.” I will say, part of my irritation is that I am doing this and if I say, this sucks, there are people out there committed to insisting that it doesn’t, really. My kids saw their grandparents at least twice a week before — now, we see them maybe once a month for a short period socially distanced with masks outside. My five-year-old has no friends because it’s hard to make friends as a kindergarten student who has only been online. My high schooler has developed anxiety. I can say that we are making the right decisions while still acknowledging that this has a real cost for kids, and all the yelling at me about “resilience” doesn’t change the fact that my kids will survive this and they laugh every day but this totally blows. I get it. My two younger kids have commented that it is hard not having friends and that they get no social time in virtual school — they can’t message anyone or chat even during lunch hour or breaks. My 16 year old started attending therapy. It sucks. Of course it does. It sucks for me too. But in a year from now, we will look back at this time and say, yes, it really sucked but we got through it. And I hope they will have all learned that no matter how hard life gets, that we get through it. I’m completely exhausted having to remain positive and being their only form of real support and not having any form of support for me. |
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Post by Laurie on Jan 5, 2021 18:21:30 GMT
The only extracuricular right now is basketball.. now there is no cheer, no JV games but those varsity kids still get to play. There is only 2 tickets per family for the games. I am not sure how it works though. Do the parents of the girls players have to evacuate the gym, and are the parents of the boy players allowed to come in to watch the girls games. They are all the same tickets. At least for the games we have been to the answer is no. From what I understand it depends on the gym size/capacity. The smaller gyms we get 2, larger gyms we get 6 but the average gym sizes and tickets seem to be 4. |
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sassyangel
Drama Llama
Posts: 7,456
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Post by sassyangel on Jan 5, 2021 18:24:03 GMT
Encouraging resilience doesn’t mean denying feelings. It means we say, “This sucks! We’re sad! We are giving up a lot of fun things that were important to us, but we’re doing it because being healthy and responsible is more important right now. So it’s ok to be sad... but we’re also going to be strong, and be proud that we’re making responsible choices, and get through this.” I will say, part of my irritation is that I am doing this and if I say, this sucks, there are people out there committed to insisting that it doesn’t, really. My kids saw their grandparents at least twice a week before — now, we see them maybe once a month for a short period socially distanced with masks outside. My five-year-old has no friends because it’s hard to make friends as a kindergarten student who has only been online. My high schooler has developed anxiety. I can say that we are making the right decisions while still acknowledging that this has a real cost for kids, and all the yelling at me about “resilience” doesn’t change the fact that my kids will survive this and they laugh every day but this totally blows. Oh no, it sucks so bad. It really does. Is it relatively bad compared to other times in history? Perhaps not. But for this time? It’s still sucky, absolutely. For me, resilience is acknowledging and accepting it sucks and making a choice despite that to make the best of it. I don’t think minimalizing or denial like that helps that at all, and those people saying that can go pound sand. |
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Post by jeremysgirl on Jan 5, 2021 18:41:13 GMT
I will say, part of my irritation is that I am doing this and if I say, this sucks, there are people out there committed to insisting that it doesn’t, really. My kids saw their grandparents at least twice a week before — now, we see them maybe once a month for a short period socially distanced with masks outside. My five-year-old has no friends because it’s hard to make friends as a kindergarten student who has only been online. My high schooler has developed anxiety. I can say that we are making the right decisions while still acknowledging that this has a real cost for kids, and all the yelling at me about “resilience” doesn’t change the fact that my kids will survive this and they laugh every day but this totally blows. Oh no, it sucks so bad. It really does. Is it relatively bad compared to other times in history? Perhaps not. But for this time? It’s still sucky, absolutely. For me, resilience is acknowledging and accepting it sucks and making a choice despite that to make the best of it. I don’t think minimalizing or denial like that helps that at all, and those people saying that can go pound sand. This is where I stand on it too. The thing is, it sucks for *everyone*. No one's experience here is unique. There are differing degrees of it. Some are handling it better than others. But no one lays unaffected. |
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Post by Merge on Jan 5, 2021 18:49:32 GMT
I think the point is that there are only so many hours in a day. We’d all love to spend less time on test prep and more on community and emotional stuff. There simply isn’t time. I get that. More than anyone, a school psychologist gets that. But we literally sat down and made time. I reply to you because I actually sat with the music tracher and we came up ways to naturally building SEL opportunities into her music lessons. She told me what she teaches and what her standards are; we worked to find pieces, songs, melodies, and a lot of other music terms I don’t know and used it to have natural conversations about how rhythm, pitch, melody, lyrics, and all those other fancy terms I don’t know about music can affect how you are feeling. We even presented it to the school board to highlight the need to INTEGRATE subjects into SEL instead of this idea that any of us (including me and my fifty trillion evaluations) have time for some stand alone material. Admin seems to schedule every second of every day. Nobody has time for a comprehensive program on SEL because they want the school to be accredited and blue ribbon and sped in compliance. So we had to think (way) outside the box. We worked with the lead language arts teacher and purposely tied in reading material that lent itself to natural conversations about how characters in books were feeling or thinking based on their situations. We have a long way to go with that but we got a good start. Our PE coaches used our PBIS to build team work and cooperation and being a good loser and even overcoming fear of failure into teaching sports skills in basketball and football. I wish I were in your district because this would be a blast to do with you. I love music but knew very little about the ins and outs of it all. I learned so much from our music teacher (elementary) doing this project with her. I really wish we could’ve done more and presented our findings at my national conference that was cancelled... Yeah, a lot of stuff integrates naturally and I do that. But I have a ton of curriculum to cover in 45 minutes, once a week. I will work in other subjects if and when it integrates naturally. My classroom management is conducted in such a way that it naturally builds self-regulation and other skills. But I'm not setting aside any part of my curriculum to do SEL (or math or ELA or whatever), particularly if the classroom teachers aren't being asked to do the same. Admin always seems to think, oh, no big deal for specialists to just work that stuff in. It is a big deal. No one asks the math teacher to work some music literacy into their curriculum. I agree with the poster above who said that teachers cannot be responsible for solving all of society's ills. The rest of the village, in many cases, is not working with us. We can only do so much. I teach music in part because I believe involvement in and appreciation of the arts is necessary for functioning, creative humans. Kids who go on to middle and high school choir/band/orchestra gain a sense of responsibility, community, and other important SEL skills. |
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Dani-Mani
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by Dani-Mani on Jan 5, 2021 18:55:04 GMT
I get that. More than anyone, a school psychologist gets that. But we literally sat down and made time. I reply to you because I actually sat with the music tracher and we came up ways to naturally building SEL opportunities into her music lessons. She told me what she teaches and what her standards are; we worked to find pieces, songs, melodies, and a lot of other music terms I don’t know and used it to have natural conversations about how rhythm, pitch, melody, lyrics, and all those other fancy terms I don’t know about music can affect how you are feeling. We even presented it to the school board to highlight the need to INTEGRATE subjects into SEL instead of this idea that any of us (including me and my fifty trillion evaluations) have time for some stand alone material. Admin seems to schedule every second of every day. Nobody has time for a comprehensive program on SEL because they want the school to be accredited and blue ribbon and sped in compliance. So we had to think (way) outside the box. We worked with the lead language arts teacher and purposely tied in reading material that lent itself to natural conversations about how characters in books were feeling or thinking based on their situations. We have a long way to go with that but we got a good start. Our PE coaches used our PBIS to build team work and cooperation and being a good loser and even overcoming fear of failure into teaching sports skills in basketball and football. I wish I were in your district because this would be a blast to do with you. I love music but knew very little about the ins and outs of it all. I learned so much from our music teacher (elementary) doing this project with her. I really wish we could’ve done more and presented our findings at my national conference that was cancelled... Yeah, a lot of stuff integrates naturally and I do that. But I have a ton of curriculum to cover in 45 minutes, once a week. I will work in other subjects if and when it integrates naturally. My classroom management is conducted in such a way that it naturally builds self-regulation and other skills. But I'm not setting aside any part of my curriculum to do SEL (or math or ELA or whatever), particularly if the classroom teachers aren't being asked to do the same. Admin always seems to think, oh, no big deal for specialists to just work that stuff in. It is a big deal. No one asks the math teacher to work some music literacy into their curriculum. I agree with the poster above who said that teachers cannot be responsible for solving all of society's ills. The rest of the village, in many cases, is not working with us. We can only do so much. I teach music in part because I believe involvement in and appreciation of the arts is necessary for functioning, creative humans. Kids who go on to middle and high school choir/band/orchestra gain a sense of responsibility, community, and other important SEL skills. Our math teacher does incorporate music into their curriculum. So do our social studies and science teachers. And obviously our reading teacher does. The PE teacher works with the science teacher to incorpate things about the body into their curriculum. Our music teacher and art teacher do a unit together that involves music, art, and painting/drawing. We are now working with all of them to include more SEL opportunities in the partnerships they already do. SEL doesn’t have to be an entire curriculum when it’s successfully integrated into all the rest; and when you are already doing cross curriculuar studies, that’s super simple. Academics shouldn’t be taught in isolation if it’s supposed to be meaningful and SEL isn’t any different. |
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Post by Merge on Jan 5, 2021 20:02:15 GMT
Yeah, a lot of stuff integrates naturally and I do that. But I have a ton of curriculum to cover in 45 minutes, once a week. I will work in other subjects if and when it integrates naturally. My classroom management is conducted in such a way that it naturally builds self-regulation and other skills. But I'm not setting aside any part of my curriculum to do SEL (or math or ELA or whatever), particularly if the classroom teachers aren't being asked to do the same. Admin always seems to think, oh, no big deal for specialists to just work that stuff in. It is a big deal. No one asks the math teacher to work some music literacy into their curriculum. I agree with the poster above who said that teachers cannot be responsible for solving all of society's ills. The rest of the village, in many cases, is not working with us. We can only do so much. I teach music in part because I believe involvement in and appreciation of the arts is necessary for functioning, creative humans. Kids who go on to middle and high school choir/band/orchestra gain a sense of responsibility, community, and other important SEL skills. Our math teacher does incorporate music into their curriculum. So do our social studies and science teachers. And obviously our reading teacher does. The PE teacher works with the science teacher to incorpate things about the body into their curriculum. Our music teacher and art teacher do a unit together that involves music, art, and painting/drawing. We are now working with all of them to include more SEL opportunities in the partnerships they already do. SEL doesn’t have to be an entire curriculum when it’s successfully integrated into all the rest; and when you are already doing cross curriculuar studies, that’s super simple. Academics shouldn’t be taught in isolation if it’s supposed to be meaningful and SEL isn’t any different. Using learning songs is not the same thing as incorporating meaningful music literacy work into the curriculum. Unless your teachers are modeling and teaching appropriate vocal tone, in tune singing, and rhythmic/melodic accuracy, they may actually be doing more musical harm than good. Again, it’s not super simple when you already have a full curriculum to teach in 45 minutes once a week. I’m fortunate to have admin who understand this. |
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Country Ham
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,314
Jun 25, 2014 19:32:08 GMT
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Post by Country Ham on Jan 5, 2021 20:22:15 GMT
Our math teacher does incorporate music into their curriculum. So do our social studies and science teachers. And obviously our reading teacher does. The PE teacher works with the science teacher to incorpate things about the body into their curriculum. Our music teacher and art teacher do a unit together that involves music, art, and painting/drawing. We are now working with all of them to include more SEL opportunities in the partnerships they already do. SEL doesn’t have to be an entire curriculum when it’s successfully integrated into all the rest; and when you are already doing cross curriculuar studies, that’s super simple. Academics shouldn’t be taught in isolation if it’s supposed to be meaningful and SEL isn’t any different. I am probably one of the very few people who strongly dislikes an integrated curriculum. There is no break from certain areas of learning for example. I never personally had any areas where I struggled in school but I did have areas of study that I wasn't interested it. My daughter had the same struggle one time. So in grade school she was learning a particular subject in science. At the same time in her reading class they were reading a story that incorporated this same subject at the same time, and in art they had to make a diorama depicting the same subject. If you don't like science you didn't get to go to art class and get a break from science.. Integrated learning can certainly reinforce principles but sometimes you need a break from a subject too. |
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inkedup
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,837
Jun 26, 2014 5:00:26 GMT
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Post by inkedup on Jan 5, 2021 20:38:09 GMT
I live in a conservative area of Southern California. Half the houses around us proudly display Trump gear.
People are angry about Biden, leftists and SOCIALISM. They scream about personal responsibility, the tyranny of masks and "Commiefornia".
The anti-masking, pro-school opening parents are insufferable on our school district's FB page. Suddenly, the personal responsibility crowd wants to pin the responsibility for their children's emotional well being solely on the educators that our socialist school system pays for.
The ignorance, hypocrisy and entitlement are off the charts.
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Post by Merge on Jan 5, 2021 21:06:10 GMT
Our math teacher does incorporate music into their curriculum. So do our social studies and science teachers. And obviously our reading teacher does. The PE teacher works with the science teacher to incorpate things about the body into their curriculum. Our music teacher and art teacher do a unit together that involves music, art, and painting/drawing. We are now working with all of them to include more SEL opportunities in the partnerships they already do. SEL doesn’t have to be an entire curriculum when it’s successfully integrated into all the rest; and when you are already doing cross curriculuar studies, that’s super simple. Academics shouldn’t be taught in isolation if it’s supposed to be meaningful and SEL isn’t any different. I am probably one of the very few people who strongly dislikes an integrated curriculum. There is no break from certain areas of learning for example. I never personally had any areas where I struggled in school but I did have areas of study that I wasn't interested it. My daughter had the same struggle one time. So in grade school she was learning a particular subject in science. At the same time in her reading class they were reading a story that incorporated this same subject at the same time, and in art they had to make a diorama depicting the same subject. If you don't like science you didn't get to go to art class and get a break from science.. Integrated learning can certainly reinforce principles but sometimes you need a break from a subject too. I don't have a problem with integrating subjects where there is a natural need. My third graders are shocked every year when we spend a lot of time doing math (fractions) in our study of rhythmic figures - but it's necessary to cultivate full understanding. I don't teach it to raise math scores. I teach it to make better musicians. I do have a problem with integration for its own sake, particularly when it's pushed off on specialist teachers to protect the instructional time of the classroom teachers. I'm in favor of SEL in school, but I'm also protective of my curriculum. I teach music because I think music is important, not because I want to be a vehicle for other curriculum. Over the past few decades, there's been an enormous push to justify the teaching of music in school because it raises test scores, or it teaches certain soft skills, or it can be used to enhance math/ELA/science/history/SEL. We are now realizing how destructive that mindset was to arts education overall, because it led to the idea in some places that "music" class should just be singing about science, singing about history, etc., and can be taught by anyone who can run a video screen. But the arts are valuable for their own sake. They deserve standalone time (far more than we actually get). And since we get so little time, I'm going to protect it fiercely. Music has its own unique content knowledge and pedagogy, and most classroom teachers are not equipped to do what a qualified music specialist does - just as I am not qualified to teach early literacy or advanced math. |
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Post by Merge on Jan 5, 2021 21:09:17 GMT
I live in a conservative area of Southern California. Half the houses around us proudly display Trump gear. People are angry about Biden, leftists and SOCIALISM. They scream about personal responsibility, the tyranny of masks and "Commiefornia". The anti-masking, pro-school opening parents are insufferable on our school district's FB page. Suddenly, the personal responsibility crowd wants to pin the responsibility for their children's emotional well being solely on the educators that our socialist school system pays for. The ignorance, hypocrisy and entitlement are off the charts. This. Before we went back in the fall, the pro-opening parents tried to soft sell their position by saying everyone should have a choice - teachers and students. They said teachers who had health conditions or fragile family members could stay home, and those who wanted to could teach in person. But that's not reality. Students get a choice, but teachers don't - we are bound to whatever the most self-centered parents want to do. |
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Dani-Mani
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,709
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Post by Dani-Mani on Jan 5, 2021 21:17:40 GMT
I live in a conservative area of Southern California. Half the houses around us proudly display Trump gear. People are angry about Biden, leftists and SOCIALISM. They scream about personal responsibility, the tyranny of masks and "Commiefornia". The anti-masking, pro-school opening parents are insufferable on our school district's FB page. Suddenly, the personal responsibility crowd wants to pin the responsibility for their children's emotional well being solely on the educators that our socialist school system pays for. The ignorance, hypocrisy and entitlement are off the charts. Is this where they are storming malls and grocery stores without masks, looking like absolute idiots screaming at masked folks? |
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Dani-Mani
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,709
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Post by Dani-Mani on Jan 5, 2021 21:19:31 GMT
Our math teacher does incorporate music into their curriculum. So do our social studies and science teachers. And obviously our reading teacher does. The PE teacher works with the science teacher to incorpate things about the body into their curriculum. Our music teacher and art teacher do a unit together that involves music, art, and painting/drawing. We are now working with all of them to include more SEL opportunities in the partnerships they already do. SEL doesn’t have to be an entire curriculum when it’s successfully integrated into all the rest; and when you are already doing cross curriculuar studies, that’s super simple. Academics shouldn’t be taught in isolation if it’s supposed to be meaningful and SEL isn’t any different. Using learning songs is not the same thing as incorporating meaningful music literacy work into the curriculum. Unless your teachers are modeling and teaching appropriate vocal tone, in tune singing, and rhythmic/melodic accuracy, they may actually be doing more musical harm than good. Again, it’s not super simple when you already have a full curriculum to teach in 45 minutes once a week. I’m fortunate to have admin who understand this. It’s not “learning songs.” 🙄 Nor did I say it was. But I’m beating a dead horse as is usually the case with you. I usually like you but you hate to be wrong and it’s kinda irritating because it doesn’t lend to productive conversations. I’m very thankful for our districts willingness to try new things and I much prefer an integrated curriculum to other things I’ve been exposed to. Clearly your district works for you too. To each his own. I’m blessed to work in a district where the focus isn’t on making better artists or musicians or mathematicians but better people and realizing they have to work together to do so. It took me a while to find this district but I’m happy I did. Anyway. I’m outta this thread it’s hard to read some of what you guys are writing when I live it every day. I’m thankful many of your districts have people who are fighting for the SEL needs of your students. The CARES act also made it a requirement. So at the end of the day, our district considered cutting arts and sports (which I disapproved of) but still purchased the SEL curriculum and tools I requested even when money was a concern. It’s a small step in the right direction. |
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Post by Merge on Jan 5, 2021 21:56:41 GMT
Using learning songs is not the same thing as incorporating meaningful music literacy work into the curriculum. Unless your teachers are modeling and teaching appropriate vocal tone, in tune singing, and rhythmic/melodic accuracy, they may actually be doing more musical harm than good. Again, it’s not super simple when you already have a full curriculum to teach in 45 minutes once a week. I’m fortunate to have admin who understand this. It’s not “learning songs.” 🙄 Nor did I say it was. But I’m beating a dead horse as is usually the case with you. I usually like you but you hate to be wrong and it’s kinda irritating because it doesn’t lend to productive conversations. I’m very thankful for our districts willingness to try new things and I much prefer an integrated curriculum to other things I’ve been exposed to. Clearly your district works for you too. To each his own. I’m blessed to work in a district where the focus isn’t on making better artists or musicians or mathematicians but better people and realizing they have to work ion for the SEL needs of your students. The CARES act also made it a requirement. So at the end of the day, our for for considered cutting arts and sports (which I disapproved of) but still purchased the SEL curriculum and tools I requested even when money was a concern. It’s a small step in the right direction. Hate to be wrong? Lol. Ok, sure, you’re the expert on arts education. 🙄 |
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Post by Darcy Collins on Jan 5, 2021 22:40:04 GMT
This thread is pretty depressing to be honest. I actually welcomed Dani-Mani entering the conversation as the snowflake, they'd never survive a real crisis rhetoric was over the top imo. I am genuinely appalled at how little grace is continually shown at young people. I get it - this website is overwhelmingly middle aged introverts who really don't care if they ever see anyone outside their household ever again. I've heard it over and over and over again. Why is this hard - I just scrapped more. I get it - you've found your excuse to wear sweats and not makeup and binge on whatever is on netflix and would be more than happy to not bother interacting with those pesky young people ever again. All I can say is I've seen the data - and it's truly terrifying. Teen anxiety, depression and suicide are skyrocketing. Kids are in crisis. If you don't see it, frankly you're not looking. I get that the majority of people on this board just want to hear about how everyone should be happy to do anything to protect them with their high risk factors, but damn - I've read 4 pages of selfishness and it's not the children. My kids have sacrificed so much - and to read a bunch of bullshit about how they should be more resilient. I guess I'm wondering what exactly you've done in the last 9 months to increase your resiliency. |
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Post by PEAcan pie on Jan 5, 2021 23:36:37 GMT
Our local high school cheer/drill team has 50% positive testing for Covid. What region are you in? We have stayed home except for football. I just signed my 8 year-old up for lacrosse, he is sooo lonely and bored. I keep thinking I will get the vaccine soon. I work at the Schools although School is closed, I am hoping we are considered essential and will get the it sooner than later. I just want him to get out of the house and get exercise but now I am rethinking this decision. |
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Post by Merge on Jan 5, 2021 23:56:09 GMT
This thread is pretty depressing to be honest. I actually welcomed Dani-Mani entering the conversation as the snowflake, they'd never survive a real crisis rhetoric was over the top imo. I am genuinely appalled at how little grace is continually shown at young people. I get it - this website is overwhelmingly middle aged introverts who really don't care if they ever see anyone outside their household ever again. I've heard it over and over and over again. Why is this hard - I just scrapped more. I get it - you've found your excuse to wear sweats and not makeup and binge on whatever is on netflix and would be more than happy to not bother interacting with those pesky young people ever again. All I can say is I've seen the data - and it's truly terrifying. Teen anxiety, depression and suicide are skyrocketing. Kids are in crisis. If you don't see it, frankly you're not looking. I get that the majority of people on this board just want to hear about how everyone should be happy to do anything to protect them with their high risk factors, but damn - I've read 4 pages of selfishness and it's not the children. My kids have sacrificed so much - and to read a bunch of bullshit about how they should be more resilient. I guess I'm wondering what exactly you've done in the last 9 months to increase your resiliency. Oh girl. I’m gonna ignore 90% of what you just said, and leave it at this: I’ve increased my resiliency by setting firm boundaries, and by putting my mental health and that of my own kids above any job that would replace me in a heartbeat if I kicked off tomorrow. |
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seaexplore
Prolific Pea
Posts: 8,844
Apr 25, 2015 23:57:30 GMT
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Post by seaexplore on Jan 6, 2021 1:21:43 GMT
I’m right there with you katybee . Last school board meeting, the letters from the parents about their kids social emotional health and sports (not a single mention of academics).... I wanted to scream in their faces that none of that matters if they are dead or have life long damage that we can’t even know about. Of course, my board fell right in line with them because they’re big names in our area. The current plan is an emergency board meeting Friday to make a decision going forward. Board wants full in person minimum 4 days a week. Teachers are 82% opposed to returning in person. It has pretty much fallen on deaf ears. Currently we have no sports or dances or ANYTHING except for academic classes. Parents seem to think that these things still exist right now even when they have been told they’re not hapoening. Of course, the same vocal parents are having many different families of kids over to hang out and have sleep overs and not a single one is masked. But, you know... kids don’t get it. SMH. It’s not just about the kids. Since when is it the teachers responsibility to teach social emotional health? That should come from home, from the parents. Schools can help but it should not be why kids are coming to school. Quite simply, teachers were heroes in the spring for flipping it around and making it work and now we’re babies who don’t want to have in person instruction while infection rates are high. We are expendable. We have always “done it for the kids” and when we say no more, we’re the bad guys. It sucks. I don’t even know if I want to be a teacher anymore after 22 years. The level of disrespect and not being heard is very disheartening. I cannot, cannot, cannot stand when a teacher tells me it’s not their job to teach social emotional health. You can’t be serious??? Do we no longer believe it takes a village? Did you miss the part in my post that I made red? I don't mind HELPING with it but it should not be the primary reason kids come to school. SEL is a very SMALL part of what we do. Yes, it absolutely takes a village but there are so many parents who just don't do ANY part that it ALL falls to teachers and schools. My tiny school of about 450 kids has THREE social workers on staff! THREE! |
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inkedup
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,837
Jun 26, 2014 5:00:26 GMT
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Post by inkedup on Jan 6, 2021 1:29:32 GMT
This thread is pretty depressing to be honest. I actually welcomed Dani-Mani entering the conversation as the snowflake, they'd never survive a real crisis rhetoric was over the top imo. I am genuinely appalled at how little grace is continually shown at young people. I get it - this website is overwhelmingly middle aged introverts who really don't care if they ever see anyone outside their household ever again. I've heard it over and over and over again. Why is this hard - I just scrapped more. I get it - you've found your excuse to wear sweats and not makeup and binge on whatever is on netflix and would be more than happy to not bother interacting with those pesky young people ever again. All I can say is I've seen the data - and it's truly terrifying. Teen anxiety, depression and suicide are skyrocketing. Kids are in crisis. If you don't see it, frankly you're not looking. I get that the majority of people on this board just want to hear about how everyone should be happy to do anything to protect them with their high risk factors, but damn - I've read 4 pages of selfishness and it's not the children. My kids have sacrificed so much - and to read a bunch of bullshit about how they should be more resilient. I guess I'm wondering what exactly you've done in the last 9 months to increase your resiliency. I think we are all facing challenges right now. I can see my family's luck and privilege from rom my middle class, not financially affected by the pandemic perch. It seems like the people I know that are crying the loudest about their children's mental health are also some of the most privileged. I know families that are facing eviction and hunger. People whose daily struggles before the pandemic were worse than anything facing our families now. The people who complain the loudest and the most, though, are a certain group of middle and upper middle class parents expecting the world to stop because their offspring are, for the first time, facing difficulty. We are not criticizing the children so much as we are criticizing the entitled army of Karens that raised them. My super social 7 year old son is lonely. He misses friends, school and life. We talk about how it's okay to feel sad and to miss the way things were. But then, we work hard to shift gears and focus on gratitude. We have a safe and clean home to live in. Our families are healthy. We have healthy food and books and toys and puzzles and a family that cares for one another. Obviously, perspective won't treat mental illness and parents need to seek help for real mental health issues in their children. I do, however, think many people have a sense of entitlement and lack of perspective that cause them to be less resilient. Also, not sure what my makeup or clothing choices have to do with my opinion, but I'm wearing a cute outfit AND makeup, so ... |
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katybee
Drama Llama
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Post by katybee on Jan 6, 2021 1:47:10 GMT
christine58 and Dani-Mani (You said you were leaving this thread, so you might not even see this): You don’t know me, or what kind of teacher I am. So let me tell you— The most important thing in my classroom is to welcome ALL children as they are, build strong relationships and community and let kids know they are loved—every day. I am an inclusion teacher. Every year (at the request of my SPED teachers and LSP) I teach kids with learning disabilities, severe ADHD, emotional difficulties, trauma, autism, and more. I love it. The last few years I have been hit, scratched, bit, spit on, had chairs and desks thrown at me. And every year, I volunteer again. Because I love it. I am the teacher others come to when they want to learn how to set up a calm space, make a picture schedule, use social stories, set up and use effective DBRC’s and do check-ins/check-outs. I did TRIBES for years, and now do Capturing Kids’ Hearts (we are a Showcase School). And the SEL curriculum that we use is Second Step (that is new—this is our 2nd full year). I taught grit and growth mindset before they were buzzwords, and I would say one of the books that guides my teaching the most these days is A Mindset for Learning by Kristine Mraz and Christine Hertz. I teach SEL. Every day. My point was that kids (in general) are coming into kindergarten lacking some very basic SEL skills. I don’t know why. But it would be MUCH BETTER if these skills were at least started to be taught at home. Yes—we can teach it. But it should start at home. As for the sports, I will not change my mind. It it reckless and irresponsible to continue to play organized, school sponsored sports in my community, where we are running out of hospital beds and are going to have to start rationing care. So this might be a good teachable moment: ”Looks like we might have to skip basketball season this winter and find other fun things to do and other ways to get exercise/socialize with our friends. We must think of our community as a whole and make some small sacrifices. It’s OK to be sad. It’s sucks. Before we know it, numbers will go down (because we helped) and we will be able to do the things we love again.”
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Post by christine58 on Jan 6, 2021 3:10:38 GMT
christine58 and Dani-Mani (You said you were leaving this thread, so you might not even see this): You don’t know me, or what kind of teacher I am. So let me tell you— The most important thing in my classroom is to welcome ALL children as they are, build strong relationships and community and let kids know they are loved—every day. I am an inclusion teacher. Every year (at the request of my SPED teachers and LSP) I teach kids with learning disabilities, severe ADHD, emotional difficulties, trauma, autism, and more. I love it. The last few years I have been hit, scratched, bit, spit on, had chairs and desks thrown at me. And every year, I volunteer again. Because I love it. I am the teacher others come to when they want to learn how to set up a calm space, make a picture schedule, use social stories, set up and use effective DBRC’s and do check-ins/check-outs. I did TRIBES for years, and now do Capturing Kids’ Hearts (we are a Showcase School). And the SEL curriculum that we use is Second Step (that is new—this is our 2nd full year). I taught grit and growth mindset before they were buzzwords, and I would say one of the books that guides my teaching the most these days is A Mindset for Learning by Kristine Mraz and Christine Hertz. I teach SEL. Every day. My point was that kids (in general) are coming into kindergarten lacking some very basic SEL skills. I don’t know why. But it would be MUCH BETTER if these skills were at least started to be taught at home. Yes—we can teach it. But it should start at home. As for the sports, I will not change my mind. It it reckless and irresponsible to continue to play organized, school sponsored sports in my community, where we are running out of hospital beds and are going to have to start rationing care. So this might be a good teachable moment: ”Looks like we might have to skip basketball season this winter and find other fun things to do and other ways to get exercise/socialize with our friends. We must think of our community as a whole and make some small sacrifices. It’s OK to be sad. It’s sucks. Before we know it, numbers will go down (because we helped) and we will be able to do the things we love again.” Wow you are very angry. And I don’t know why but I will tell you this you also don’t know what kind of teacher I was. I taught severely emotionally disturbed students for 90% of my career with a the majority of them having severe mental health issues. Their parents for the most part, we’re as mentally ill as they were so there’s no way that some of the skills could’ve ever been taught at home. Your post went from being upset over organize sports to putting yourself on a pedestal as a teacher. It is reckless and irresponsible to play organized sports when Covid is so high. I didn’t disagree with you about that. Every single teacher I know is under so much stress right now that adding one more thing to their plate has got to feel so backbreaking. What you’ve done as a teacher, as you so eloquently pointed out, it’s truly no different than many many teachers across this country. We take care of our kids, we take care of their mental health issues, we attempt to make them better citizens, and we want to do what’s best for them above all else. This is a different time across the board, across this nation, across the world when it comes to educating children. We either have to find a way to go with the flow and focus on what we can as educators or our profession is going to be decimated because people will have left it. So take a deep breath, realize that what you’re doing for kids is important, and find a way to not be so angry when something is pointed out to you. I know you’re under stress, I know that you went from teaching kindergarten to third grade, and I also know that you have a brother who is fighting cancer. |
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katybee
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,459
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Post by katybee on Jan 6, 2021 4:12:43 GMT
christine58 and Dani-Mani (You said you were leaving this thread, so you might not even see this): You don’t know me, or what kind of teacher I am. So let me tell you— The most important thing in my classroom is to welcome ALL children as they are, build strong relationships and community and let kids know they are loved—every day. I am an inclusion teacher. Every year (at the request of my SPED teachers and LSP) I teach kids with learning disabilities, severe ADHD, emotional difficulties, trauma, autism, and more. I love it. The last few years I have been hit, scratched, bit, spit on, had chairs and desks thrown at me. And every year, I volunteer again. Because I love it. I am the teacher others come to when they want to learn how to set up a calm space, make a picture schedule, use social stories, set up and use effective DBRC’s and do check-ins/check-outs. I did TRIBES for years, and now do Capturing Kids’ Hearts (we are a Showcase School). And the SEL curriculum that we use is Second Step (that is new—this is our 2nd full year). I taught grit and growth mindset before they were buzzwords, and I would say one of the books that guides my teaching the most these days is A Mindset for Learning by Kristine Mraz and Christine Hertz. I teach SEL. Every day. My point was that kids (in general) are coming into kindergarten lacking some very basic SEL skills. I don’t know why. But it would be MUCH BETTER if these skills were at least started to be taught at home. Yes—we can teach it. But it should start at home. As for the sports, I will not change my mind. It it reckless and irresponsible to continue to play organized, school sponsored sports in my community, where we are running out of hospital beds and are going to have to start rationing care. So this might be a good teachable moment: ”Looks like we might have to skip basketball season this winter and find other fun things to do and other ways to get exercise/socialize with our friends. We must think of our community as a whole and make some small sacrifices. It’s OK to be sad. It’s sucks. Before we know it, numbers will go down (because we helped) and we will be able to do the things we love again.” Wow you are very angry. And I don’t know why but I will tell you this you also don’t know what kind of teacher I was. I taught severely emotionally disturbed students for 90% of my career with a the majority of them having severe mental health issues. Their parents for the most part, we’re as mentally ill as they were so there’s no way that some of the skills could’ve ever been taught at home. Your post went from being upset over organize sports to putting yourself on a pedestal as a teacher. It is reckless and irresponsible to play organized sports when Covid is so high. I didn’t disagree with you about that. Every single teacher I know is under so much stress right now that adding one more thing to their plate has got to feel so backbreaking. What you’ve done as a teacher, as you so eloquently pointed out, it’s truly no different than many many teachers across this country. We take care of our kids, we take care of their mental health issues, we attempt to make them better citizens, and we want to do what’s best for them above all else. This is a different time across the board, across this nation, across the world when it comes to educating children. We either have to find a way to go with the flow and focus on what we can as educators or our profession is going to be decimated because people will have left it. So take a deep breath, realize that what you’re doing for kids is important, and find a way to not be so angry when something is pointed out to you. I know you’re under stress, I know that you went from teaching kindergarten to third grade, and I also know that you have a brother who is fighting cancer. Not putting myself on a pedestal as a teacher. DEFENDING myself as a teacher. I’m not angry. I’m tired, frustrated, disheartened and SCARED. Never once have I questioned you as a teacher or made you feel less than. But whether you meant to or not, you just made me feel that way (and you have before). So let’s just agree not to engage in the future. Like I said, I’m unbelievably tired and probably overly sensitive, but I have to be done with this. |
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Post by beaglemom on Jan 6, 2021 4:56:05 GMT
My oldest is in 1st grade, so I don’t have a lot of experience with the teen experience or extra curriculars. I think the younger the child, the easier this probably is. That said, we have been fully distance learning since March and my daughter is doing well. I work hard to model a positive attitude and help us keep perspective. We focus on what we CAN still do and not what we can’t and that goes a long way. It’s a tricky line to walk between not having ourselves a pity party but also acknowledging her feelings and not dismissing them. I think we all need to do what we can to mitigate this virus especially for the high risk and healthcare workers. I don’t think it is helpful at all for parents to blame the school board and teachers, and essentially throw fits about not getting our way. If your child is struggling, that energy is better spent finding safe and available ways to help them through this. I think this is huge. I think 90% of the bitching is parents having issues and projecting or creating problems for their children. In our school district (one of the very few public districts in CA that is back in person like "normal") the parents that were the loudest were the ones that have money to burn, nannies/babysitters/etc, and were tired of having their kids at home. I think that parental attitude and what they are saying is huge in terms of how the kid handles the situation. I am on another board with spouses of tech workers. There was a mom complaining about how it is so awful and she is going to have to put her 6 year old in therapy because of it, etc. Saying it's not fair that the rich in CA can send their kids to private school, etc. Someone tried pointing out that she is privileged, her spouse hasn't had to take a cut in pay, is able to work from home, they have good health care, etc. I haven't seen her do anything but complain since March. I am sure that they are having a hard time, but I also think that her attitude and what her kids hear her saying has a huge impact on what they are feeling. |
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Post by Merge on Jan 6, 2021 13:39:57 GMT
I’m not angry. I’m tired, frustrated, disheartened and SCARED. You need to find some joy every day. Every teacher I know is tired and sad and frustrated. I get it...I do. BUT find a way to be kind to yourself. Toxic positivity is a thing and not helpful. Teachers get to have their feelings without you telling them they need to get rid of them so society can feel more comfortable about the position they’ve put us in. |
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Post by peano on Jan 6, 2021 14:06:02 GMT
This thread is pretty depressing to be honest. I actually welcomed Dani-Mani entering the conversation as the snowflake, they'd never survive a real crisis rhetoric was over the top imo. I am genuinely appalled at how little grace is continually shown at young people. I get it - this website is overwhelmingly middle aged introverts who really don't care if they ever see anyone outside their household ever again. I've heard it over and over and over again. Why is this hard - I just scrapped more. I get it - you've found your excuse to wear sweats and not makeup and binge on whatever is on netflix and would be more than happy to not bother interacting with those pesky young people ever again. All I can say is I've seen the data - and it's truly terrifying. Teen anxiety, depression and suicide are skyrocketing. Kids are in crisis. If you don't see it, frankly you're not looking. I get that the majority of people on this board just want to hear about how everyone should be happy to do anything to protect them with their high risk factors, but damn - I've read 4 pages of selfishness and it's not the children. My kids have sacrificed so much - and to read a bunch of bullshit about how they should be more resilient. I guess I'm wondering what exactly you've done in the last 9 months to increase your resiliency. Well, first of all, I didn’t just start nine months ago, it’s been a lifelong job for me in an effort to avoid falling prey to major depression and killing myself. But since you ask, in this past nine months, I have had online therapy sessions, I have avoided long periods of zoning out on media like Netflix, my alcohol consumption is down from pre-pandemic levels, I continue to exercise daily and try to eat healthy the majority of the time, I have introduced more creative pursuits into my life, I cuddle with my animals, and most importantly, since I am, what was it—a middle aged introvert who doesn’t care if she sees people—I have made it a priority to connect with my family both physically and emotionally and when Connecticut’s levels were low over the summer, had a few socially distanced and masked get-togethers with friends. My question to you is why are you getting so angry with us? It is clear the pandemic has exposed a great weakness in the social fabric of our lives. Instead of looking hard at where the rifts already were in our own lives, (because this was a problem WAY before the pandemic,) and making more adaptive choices and behaviors, I see a bunch of people losing their shit because they designed their lives for the easy times, not the hard ones. |
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Post by jeremysgirl on Jan 6, 2021 14:15:40 GMT
peano said: Well, first of all, I didn’t just start nine months ago, it’s been a lifelong job for me in an effort to avoid falling prey to major depression and killing myself Ummm...me too. I've started running. I've lost weight. I'm off my blood pressure medicine as I don't need it anymore. I've adjusted my meds. I've increased my reiki practice. I do yoga. I've increased my crochet time. I've read self help books. I've joined a community where we do thought work. I've done all sorts of things to try to make myself more resilient. And it's important to note, that at least with me, covid time is not the worst period of struggle I've had in my life.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jan 6, 2021 17:23:12 GMT
Teen anxiety, depression and suicide are skyrocketing. Kids are in crisis. If you don't see it, frankly you're not looking. I get that the majority of people on this board just want to hear about how everyone should be happy to do anything to protect them with their high risk factors, but damn - I've read 4 pages of selfishness and it's not the children. My kids have sacrificed so much - and to read a bunch of bullshit about how they should be more resilient. I guess I'm wondering what exactly you've done in the last 9 months to increase your resiliency. Well, first of all, I didn’t just start nine months ago, it’s been a lifelong job for me in an effort to avoid falling prey to major depression and killing myself. But since you ask, in this past nine months, I have had online therapy sessions, I have avoided long periods of zoning out on media like Netflix, my alcohol consumption is down from pre-pandemic levels, I continue to exercise daily and try to eat healthy the majority of the time, I have introduced more creative pursuits into my life, I cuddle with my animals, and most importantly, since I am, what was it—a middle aged introvert who doesn’t care if she sees people—I have made it a priority to connect with my family both physically and emotionally and when Connecticut’s levels were low over the summer, had a few socially distanced and masked get-togethers with friends. My question to you is why are you getting so angry with us? It is clear the pandemic has exposed a great weakness in the social fabric of our lives. Instead of looking hard at where the rifts already were in our own lives, (because this was a problem WAY before the pandemic,) and making more adaptive choices and behaviors, I see a bunch of people losing their shit because they designed their lives for the easy times, not the hard ones. I agree with you. For some of us, resilience building has been a lifelong thing borne out of necessity. When you experience extreme trauma as a kid, you have to find ways to cope. None of us (my siblings) had any counseling or therapy after my brother and dad died less than a week apart. Since I was on the younger end of my family group, I watched as my older siblings crashed and burned when they tried to deal with their losses with alcohol and drug abuse. Thankfully I realized that if those behaviors weren’t working for them, they likely wouldn’t work for me either and I was able to choose a different path. Out of the eight kids in my family, I was the only one who didn’t have an addiction to drugs and/or alcohol. I’m not sure how or why I ended up being the lucky one, but I’m definitely grateful that I was spared that tragedy too. For me, I try very hard to look for the silver linings in every situation and this is no different. When I see that my kid is getting down about life sucking right now due to the pandemic, I do my best to remind her of all the things we have to be grateful for when so many other people are struggling so much more than we are. I appreciate her feelings because for a kid this DOES suck, but it could suck a whole lot more. We’re all healthy. No one we personally know has gotten very sick or died from Covid. We’re financially secure. We’re not at risk of losing our housing. We don’t have to go to a food bank for groceries. We have health care if we need it. We have the ability and technology for her to go to school safely from home and we have an amazing school district. We have the ability and technology for her to hang out with her best friends virtually with FaceTime pretty much every single day. We have plenty of entertainment opportunities and things we can do. Yeah, we miss doing the stuff we normally do and we miss being with our friends, but to me it’s a very small price to pay to stay healthy and to keep everything that we already are so lucky to still have. |
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inkedup
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,837
Jun 26, 2014 5:00:26 GMT
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Post by inkedup on Jan 6, 2021 17:30:56 GMT
I’m not angry. I’m tired, frustrated, disheartened and SCARED. You need to find some joy every day. Every teacher I know is tired and sad and frustrated. I get it...I do. BUT find a way to be kind to yourself. Wow. You telling someone else to find some joy is pretty rich. I get that you're going through some stuff, but you've been a real turd to a lot of people over the last few months. You aren't teaching now. You never taught in a pandemic. Maybe keep the judgment to yourself. |
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