quiltz
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,850
Location: CANADA
Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
|
Post by quiltz on Dec 25, 2021 19:09:07 GMT
Praying for you. The first Christmas without your loved one is pretty sad. I just passed the three-year mark right after Thanksgiving, and I still have those meltdowns at times. ((HUGS)) Be kind to yourself, and try to do something "just for you." @bergdorfblonde Yes, the first Christmas and many more afterwards can have difficult and gentle memories. This Christmas marks the exact amount of Christmas' that my dd spent on earth and now in heaven. I was looking thru the scrapbooks of all of the 17 years of Christmas' with her. Tears were plenty but with a loving sorrow. (hugs) KelleeM Merry Christmas, however difficult it may be. Peace to you and all of the Peas. |
|
|
|
Post by tryingtobewise on Dec 25, 2021 19:10:46 GMT
Sending love to you @bergdorfblonde
|
|
|
|
Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Dec 25, 2021 19:40:44 GMT
(((Hugs)))
|
|
|
|
Post by scrappintoee on Dec 25, 2021 21:28:52 GMT
I was jussst thinking about you and searched to see if you'd posted recently. Soooo many ((( hugs ))) to you and everyone else who is grieving today !!!!!! 
 |
|
purplebee
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,802 
|
Post by purplebee on Dec 25, 2021 21:30:19 GMT
Sending wishes for peace and comfort. Hugs….
|
|
|
|
Post by catck on Dec 25, 2021 21:36:58 GMT
I've been thinking of you today and am sorry you are having a bad day. Sending you big hugs (())
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Nov 24, 2024 18:26:21 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 25, 2021 21:39:00 GMT
Praying for you. The first Christmas without your loved one is pretty sad. I just passed the three-year mark right after Thanksgiving, and I still have those meltdowns at times. ((HUGS)) Be kind to yourself, and try to do something "just for you." @bergdorfblonde Yes, the first Christmas and many more afterwards can have difficult and gentle memories. This Christmas marks the exact amount of Christmas' that my dd spent on earth and now in heaven. I was looking thru the scrapbooks of all of the 17 years of Christmas' with her. Tears were plenty but with a loving sorrow. (hugs) KelleeM Merry Christmas, however difficult it may be. Peace to you and all of the Peas. The loss of a child must be a million times tougher than losing anyone else. My love & hugs go out to you. It's strange that I find myself doing the same thing and I get sucked into it---I read all of his notes to me. I read his text messages to me. I read his social media DMs to me........... I look at my calendar and cannot believe how much we've been thru the past 2 years. Anyway, I understand wanting to look at the scrapbooks, pics, anything. My heart goes out to you. |
|
|
|
Post by scrappintoee on Dec 25, 2021 21:41:16 GMT
I'm so very sorry that on top of all of your sadness, you have a migraine, too!!!  I wish I could help you and everyone else who is grieving! Today is the FIRST time I've cried this much since I sat by his side all night before he passed. I thought I cried ALL of the tears I had.. Guess not! I am NOT comparing losing my brother to losing a husband -- ( I honestly don't think I'd survive that!)---but I can relate to "ALL the tears". There were times I'd cry soooo much over my brother, (and our doggies); I was afraid I'd never stop. Thanks. DD is 33 but she has bipolar and is emotionally about 11 years old. Her dad kinda dissed her today and it sent her over the edge. She's in her room, trying to nap it off. Just a tough day That is just heartbreaking, I'm so sad for her !!!! I was looking thru the scrapbooks of all of the 17 years of Christmas' with her. Tears were plenty but with a loving sorrowI like that---it's the perfect way to describe it! (( hugs )) |
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Nov 24, 2024 18:26:21 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 25, 2021 21:44:16 GMT
THANK YOU all. My heart goes out to the Peas also suffering loss or grief. Your words mean a lot.
I did stop crying. I showered and my pot roast is cooking, so that's a bit of progress.
DD's dad finally called her (vs texting!) and left a message (I was on the phone). His words of wisdom?? "There's death all around us.........." Eeks!! Reminds me why we ended our nearly 30 year marriage! He speaks in fairytale talk but it all means nothing!! I think of all the words of wisdom she's gotten from her stepdad, the support, the encouragement, the tough talk..... Anyway, they caught up on the phone & it does bring her a sense of connection, so it makes me happy for her.
Hope you're all getting thru this day. Hope some of you are having a wonderful Christmas and the rest are getting thru.
Much love and hugs to all of you!! xoxo
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Nov 24, 2024 18:26:21 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 25, 2021 21:50:04 GMT
scrappintoee Thank you, sweetie! You are such a doll. DD did catch up to her (stupid) dad and it made her happy, so that's good........ His advice or words of comfort are basically useless though! My migraine subsided after a lot of Maxalt and water. I'm having Ensure now since I haven't eaten yet today. I'm okay........ You are right about the loss of a beloved furbaby. You never know when that'll hit you hard!!! And the loss of your brother is tough. There's no comparing one to the other. Each loss is a loss. xo catck Thank you for your constant support. xo purplebee Thank you, sweetie. xo LavenderLayoutLady Thank you!! HUGS right back to you. How are you doing? xo tryingtobewise Thank you so much. Your smile can light up a room! xo
|
|
|
|
Post by christine58 on Dec 25, 2021 23:57:52 GMT
christine58 I'm so sorry. Hugs to you. Seems to be a hard-hitting year this year!!!!!!! I honestly don't cry for more than a minute. I don't get so inundated with sadness, but today is different and I don't even think it's about Christmas. We ALL should think about why it's hitting us this hard this year....... Maybe we keep it pent up and just carry on and for some reason it's coming out today??? I don't know, but I hope you'll be okay too!! Maybe it's because of COVID and other stressors we all have surrounding it. You wish Gary was here to bounce off frustrations over COVID and I wish my dad was here for the same reason |
|
|
|
Post by cakediva on Dec 26, 2021 0:03:50 GMT
(((((HUGS)))))
|
|
|
|
Post by jenjie on Dec 26, 2021 1:26:28 GMT
I’m sorry honey. So very sorry. It sucks. There’s no sugarcoating it.
I’m grateful you and dd are able to lean on each other. She’s really been incredible these last weeks! Not to downplay her struggles at all, but I hope she’s able to see how strong she’s been and what a help she’s been to you.
|
|
|
|
Post by Linda on Dec 26, 2021 2:55:14 GMT
((((Hugs)))
|
|
|
|
Post by tentoes on Dec 26, 2021 3:33:21 GMT
Merry Christmas! It’s hard. I handled the first and second without my husband far better than I am this one. It’s okay to cry. Sending love, hugs and so much understanding. Hon, I just spent my 4th Christmas without my husband, and I broke down this evening--just a bit, and I'm ok now, but sometimes it just hits ya. Hang in there. |
|
hutchfan
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,600
|
Post by hutchfan on Dec 26, 2021 5:10:44 GMT
Sending you hugs.
|
|
|
|
Post by jeremysgirl on Dec 26, 2021 13:57:53 GMT
Aww...I'm so sorry. The first holidays we had after losing my brother were so incredibly difficult. We all cried together at both Thanksgiving and Christmas. I cannot fathom the loss of husband. I'm sending you hugs and I'm still praying for you. ❤️
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Nov 24, 2024 18:26:21 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 26, 2021 15:25:57 GMT
Hoping there are moments of peace and comfort to help with the huge sadness that you are going through.
|
|
ddly
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,023
Jul 10, 2014 19:36:28 GMT
|
Post by ddly on Dec 26, 2021 15:29:26 GMT
I’m so sorry you had such a tough day! Hugs to you!
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Nov 24, 2024 18:26:21 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 26, 2021 16:36:26 GMT
I’m sorry honey. So very sorry. It sucks. There’s no sugarcoating it. I’m grateful you and dd are able to lean on each other. She’s really been incredible these last weeks! Not to downplay her struggles at all, but I hope she’s able to see how strong she’s been and what a help she’s been to you. Thank you sweetie!! YES, DD has really stepped up. Now we hug goodnight, etc., she helps in the kitchen with cleanup (without my asking!), and she began to cook. She's taking this pretty hard, but she's realizing that it's just the 2 of us and we have to figure out what's going to happen to us soon enough.
It's 1 month since Gary passed, today. We might get out of the house...... Maybe we'll get more kleenex! LOL.
Hope your Christmas was joyous. Much love to you and yours! xo
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Nov 24, 2024 18:26:21 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 26, 2021 16:37:57 GMT
Merry Christmas! It’s hard. I handled the first and second without my husband far better than I am this one. It’s okay to cry. Sending love, hugs and so much understanding. Hon, I just spent my 4th Christmas without my husband, and I broke down this evening--just a bit, and I'm ok now, but sometimes it just hits ya. Hang in there. : I'm so sorry. Thanks for the advice. |
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Nov 24, 2024 18:26:21 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Dec 26, 2021 16:40:51 GMT
christine58 I'm so sorry. Hugs to you. Seems to be a hard-hitting year this year!!!!!!! I honestly don't cry for more than a minute. I don't get so inundated with sadness, but today is different and I don't even think it's about Christmas. We ALL should think about why it's hitting us this hard this year....... Maybe we keep it pent up and just carry on and for some reason it's coming out today??? I don't know, but I hope you'll be okay too!! Maybe it's because of COVID and other stressors we all have surrounding it. You wish Gary was here to bounce off frustrations over COVID and I wish my dad was here for the same reason COVID is less stressful now for us because we worried every minute we had to be out of the house, due to Gary. We were SO worried we'd pass it to him. We were SO protective. We didn't want to stress him with the anxiety of COVID (he had anxiety & depression). But, you're 100% right---I DO miss bouncing off ideas, info, etc., with Gary, every single day. My mom would call and he'd want to know all about it. I miss that........ I haven't been this quiet in SO long!! |
|
|
|
Post by Tamhugh on Dec 26, 2021 17:50:14 GMT
I know it is different than a spouse, but sux years ago, I lost my dad around Thanksgiving and this year I lost my mom. I have held it together pretty well for the most part but have come to realize that grief hits you at weird times and in weird ways. But that’s ok.
An example, a few weeks after my mim’s death, I had a girls weekend planned to Walt Disney World. I went along with my sister-in-law (dh’s side). During the Candlelight Processional, I totally lost it doubled over sobbing in the front row. My mom always said that in all of her trips to WDW it was the one thing she regretted never doing so it hit me harder than I would have ever expected. But you know what? It was cathartic.
Your grief is your path to walk. Other people are grieving him too but your grief has to be handled the best way for YOU.
|
|
msladibug
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,536
|
Post by msladibug on Dec 26, 2021 18:12:54 GMT
Thinking of you and your Family. Wishing you peace and comfort.
|
|
I wish I could help you and
