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Post by ~summer~ on Dec 31, 2021 0:02:14 GMT
My absolute best friend from college tragically passed away suddenly and her service is just outside NYC next weekend. She was one of my closest friends in my life - though with 3000 miles between us we had drifted in and out but during undergrad we were partners in crime/inseparable. I’m so heartbroken about the situation.
So would you fly to nyc for 3 nights next weekend? Of course it just seems crazy with the Covid numbers right now in NYC. I’m low risk, my family is low risk and we are all vaccinated and boosted. And I would really like to see my college friends and be there for her husband whom I was also friends with. But again, I know NYC is just through the roof. And the 5 hour plane ride does not seem fun and I would have to request last minute vacation. Just trying to lay out all points.
Eta - updated on next page
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Post by deekaye on Dec 31, 2021 0:07:14 GMT
I'm vaxed and boosted and religiously wear a mask. I also regularly travel to NY every other month (although I do travel to Upstate NY if that matters). I would go.
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Post by CarolinaGirl71 on Dec 31, 2021 0:12:54 GMT
I would not go. I would call the closest family member that you know and express my sympathy. A lot of funeral homes here are showing funerals online for those who can't/choose not to attend in person. Hopefully they will do that and you can watch. I would follow up the phone call with flowers and a handwritten note, and possibly a visit when the cases go down. (I a immunocompromised, that may make my response what it is).
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Post by floridagirl on Dec 31, 2021 0:16:13 GMT
I would go
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amom23
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,447 
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Post by amom23 on Dec 31, 2021 0:18:23 GMT
I would go too.
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Post by mnmloveli on Dec 31, 2021 0:19:19 GMT
I would not go. We (NY) are having 70,000 new cases a day. The lines at testing facilities are hours long. Some medical testing sites are shutting down because so many employees have tested positive.
I’m sure the family of your friend would understand. If you do go, first check the rules of any funeral home / church concerning number of people allowed in.
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Sarah*H
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,030
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Post by Sarah*H on Dec 31, 2021 0:20:22 GMT
I would go.
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Post by merry27 on Dec 31, 2021 0:20:54 GMT
I would go for sure. I’m sorry about your friend.
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Post by voltagain on Dec 31, 2021 0:21:07 GMT
I’m low risk, my family is low risk and we are all vaccinated and boosted.>>>>>>>>>>>
If that were the case for me I would go. Since I am still high risk even with my vaccinations all done I personally couldn't do it. But if I were low risk I'd do it.
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Post by lucyg on Dec 31, 2021 0:25:31 GMT
I would not go. Too much COVID, too far away, not a close enough relationship anymore. BUT that said, I’m getting on a plane to fly to Seattle next weekend for my aunt’s memorial service. So apparently it’s do as I say, not as I do.  I just feel 100% obligated. ETA no, you aren’t likely to get very sick if you do get COVID. But you could spread it to others who may not be vaccinated. That’s my worry. I know it’s their own dumb choice … but still. |
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,940
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Dec 31, 2021 0:38:47 GMT
You’re going to have to figure out what you have to risk and what you have to gain.
This sounds really important to you (and I’m very sorry about the loss of your friend). You have done everything the CDC says you need to stay safe. I’d wear a really good KN95; I might even double up. And I’d go.
It won’t be easy to maintain social distance, but I would certainly try to. And when I came home, I would isolate myself from my family for 3-5 days to ensure their safety should I catch it.
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ddly
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,023
Jul 10, 2014 19:36:28 GMT
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Post by ddly on Dec 31, 2021 0:41:47 GMT
It sounds like you really want to go, so I would. I think you’ll regret it if you don’t.
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Post by dewryce on Dec 31, 2021 1:24:59 GMT
Another thing I would consider is your job and whether you would be able to stay home and isolate when you return. Are you a teacher, do you work with the public, do you have at risk coworkers, small office with bad ventilation? Can’t isolate?
I’m very sorry about your friend.
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Post by destined2bmom on Dec 31, 2021 1:31:27 GMT
I am very sorry for the loss of your friend.
I don’t know if I would go. With the high number of cases in NY and the northeast, it’s a tough decision. And since there have been so many flights canceled due to Covid; I would be concerned about getting there and getting back.
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Post by freecharlie on Dec 31, 2021 1:31:50 GMT
I would not go, but I wouldn't go even if covid wasn't around.
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CeeScraps
Pearl Clutcher
~~occupied entertaining my brain~~
Posts: 3,930
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Post by CeeScraps on Dec 31, 2021 1:33:52 GMT
Will they be allowed to have any type of service?
I wouldn’t go between Covid and flight issues who knows if you could get there and then get home.
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J u l e e
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,531
Location: Cincinnati
Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
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Post by J u l e e on Dec 31, 2021 1:51:22 GMT
I would go (I am also very low risk, double vaccinated and boosted, could easily take off work and isolate when I returned). Mostly, I am very sorry for the loss of your friend.
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Post by ~summer~ on Dec 31, 2021 1:53:49 GMT
Thank you everyone - I really do appreciate your opinions. I feel so stressed and grumpy (my poor family I keep snapping at them) I don’t feel like I’m thinking straight lately.
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Post by ntsf on Dec 31, 2021 1:54:25 GMT
my son is in nyc now and he said there are few people around.. and the hotel rates are dropping.. but I think I would have lots of n95 masks and just wear one all the time and get take out food.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Dec 31, 2021 1:58:39 GMT
I would go.
From your post, it seems very important to you, and it would probably bother you later on if you missed it.
Yes, there's a chance you could catch covid there. You could also catch it at work, at the store, or anywhere people are. That is just a part of life now.
Mask up, try to keep distance, and mourn your friend with those who will understand and also grieve her.
I'm sorry for your loss.
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ellen
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,807
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Post by ellen on Dec 31, 2021 1:59:07 GMT
I would be most concerned about the flight - so many disruptions due to Covid. Is it possible that they'd do a livestream of her service? I'm really sorry about your friend.
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Post by epeanymous on Dec 31, 2021 2:02:59 GMT
I would not.
We were supposed to go to my niece's bat mitzvah in January. I bailed last week because of the numbers in the NE where my niece lives. DH was still going because it is his brother's kid.
Now no one is going because their family has COVID. They are all vaxxed, parents are boosted.
I don't think you are nuts if you go. But if you are asking, I would not.
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purplebee
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,802
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Post by purplebee on Dec 31, 2021 2:32:42 GMT
No, I would not go. I have family in NY and it’s crazy again. I would be concerned about flights and about the availability of medical care there should it become necessary, also, if you start having symptoms there, how difficult would your required quarantine be? Way too many what ifs for me. Send your condolences, talk w/her Dh. Nobody will fault you for not traveling to attend.
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Post by busy on Dec 31, 2021 2:42:50 GMT
You’re going to have to figure out what you have to risk and what you have to gain. This sounds really important to you (and I’m very sorry about the loss of your friend). You have done everything the CDC says you need to stay safe. I’d wear a really good KN95; I might even double up. And I’d go. It won’t be easy to maintain social distance, but I would certainly try to. And when I came home, I would isolate myself from my family for 3-5 days to ensure their safety should I catch it. This. I, personally, would regret not going. I'm so sorry for your loss. |
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Post by stampnscrap1128 on Dec 31, 2021 2:44:34 GMT
Before you make any travel plans, you need to find out if the funeral will even occur. My husband passed away last March and we could not have a funeral (this was just when the vaccinations were starting so not many people had been vaxxed yet).
Second, I would not make any airline travel plans right now. Too many cancellations due to airline employees out with Covid. I know you have only the best of intentions but be prepared for all sorts of complications.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Whether you attend or not, your memories will still be there and may they provide some measure of comfort for you.
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Post by christine58 on Dec 31, 2021 3:02:59 GMT
I would not go. We (NY) are having 70,000 new cases a day. The lines at testing facilities are hours long. Some medical testing sites are shutting down because so many employees have tested positive. I’m sure the family of your friend would understand. If you do go, first check the rules of any funeral home / church concerning number of people allowed in. That’s the entire state not the city. (70,000) |
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Post by mnmloveli on Dec 31, 2021 3:09:41 GMT
I would not go. We (NY) are having 70,000 new cases a day. The lines at testing facilities are hours long. Some medical testing sites are shutting down because so many employees have tested positive. I’m sure the family of your friend would understand. If you do go, first check the rules of any funeral home / church concerning number of people allowed in. That’s the entire state not the city. (70,000) Correct. That’s why I didn’t say NYC. |
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zella
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,884
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Post by zella on Dec 31, 2021 3:36:05 GMT
I'm so sorry to hear this.
I wouldn't go because I don't believe the flights/airline situation will be sorted out by then. I would like to know how many planes and how many crew are out of position; I'm sure it's in the thousands. At this point, any weather issues are going to make it even worse. So no, I'd stay home. You might find out if her funeral is being filmed. That's the kind of thing people have to do nowadays. And again, I'm so sorry for your loss.
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Post by christine58 on Dec 31, 2021 3:39:59 GMT
That’s the entire state not the city. (70,000) Correct. That’s why I didn’t say NYC. Well she’s worry about NYC that’s why I thought you were referring to the city. |
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Post by Darcy Collins on Dec 31, 2021 3:40:18 GMT
I would absolutely go
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I just feel 100% obligated.
