RedSquirrelUK
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,899
Location: The UK's beautiful West Country
Aug 2, 2014 13:03:45 GMT
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Post by RedSquirrelUK on Feb 17, 2022 17:10:05 GMT
You know what? You're right. My oncologists/doctors keep telling me to rest if I need to rest, but when I'm exhausted physically and surrounded by mess, it also exhausts me mentally. So even though cleaning up makes me hurt physically during and afterwards, my mind feels cleaner and more alert. On my To Do list today is to make a slow cooker beef stew and a batch of bread, and to put away the dry laundry, and change and wash the bedding. My oncologist is calling this afternoon. I'm not sure I'll get it all done. When I went through cancer treatment in 2020, they told me to rest but also told me to try tobe as active as I felt able. 😄 How does one manage that?? Lol. Do you have anyone who can help you with some of those tasks that feel like a lot but also make you feel better about your surroundings? I went through chemo at the first height of covid, so we were isolating and perhaps you are, too, but if you feel safe, I'm sure a friend would love to come help. Wishing you strength and healing. I know, right? How does one manage that? I was also told that I needed to catch my first cold. How exactly does one go about catching a cold that isn't Covid? No, not really. The offers of help have disappeared. Actually they were always 'I would if I could but I can't' offers. The actual help never really happened because like you, we couldn't have people in the house because of the Covid restrictions all through it. I just did what I could. The house got dusty and messy, the iron hasn't been used for months but the bathroom/kitchen were kept clean and we ate OK. I'm gradually getting on top of it. I finished the chemo 5 months ago and clinically my immune system should be fine - technically I'm 'better' and that's what people expect. I had 3 months off, then started working from home in August and went back into the office in November. In reality I feel more fatigued now than I did when I was going through the chemo. I'm still having targeted biologicals and immunotherapy injections every 3 weeks until July, and they make everything hurt. My liver function is still iffy and my iron levels are low. I'm sleeping half the morning then creeping around like an old woman, and grunting, groaning and dropping things. I feel 80. How long did it take you to feel normal again? Thank you to you and also to @mikklyn with extra
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Gigi42
Junior Member
Posts: 87
Location: In my own little happy place
Sept 26, 2018 17:51:35 GMT
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Post by Gigi42 on Feb 17, 2022 18:27:10 GMT
Wow!! I needed to see this today. I've been feeling so unmotivated and overwhelm doing everything by myself lately and getting no where. But this morning I realized that for the past week I have only been taking a 1/2 dose of my anti depression meds because I don't want to be on them (the whole stigma thing) but I need them. So self love for me right now is getting back on the whole dose and to stop worrying about what people think about it. I've also figured out that it's all in my head - the part about what people think. They have way more important things in their lives to think about then if I am taking anti depression meds.
Until I typed this out I didn't realize how hard I am making life for myself because I am worried about what people might think of me. There is only a handful of family that even know I take them. I just need to accept that I need them to have a better quality of life and move on with my life and stop worrying about it. Especially since I don't think any less of my friends or sister that are on them.
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Post by mom on Feb 17, 2022 20:50:11 GMT
Well, this week self love looks like asking for anxiety/depression medicine. I've done everything I can do myself to pull me out of this hole and its just not working. Not happy about it, at all. Its been a decade, almost, since my last real deep depression and I thought I was done with it. Apparently not. My Dr assures me anxiety can look and feel like depression, so we are treating the depression. But self care also looks like buying a ridiculously expensive purse, because damn it. I have to take depression meds then I at least want a cute purse to carry the pill bottle in. Im ridiculous like that. Yes that is an act of love. And you deserve some peace. And everyone deserves not to feel depressed. Depression is an ugly thing. And please don't feel bad about taking meds. They are a tool. Maybe in your case, not a forever one either. ❤️ I know you are absolutely right. I feel better about it today. Was kinda blind sighted about it yesterday. Went in thinking my panic attacks were anxiety and after talking with the Dr. its depression. When I went through depression before, it was not like this at all....I was crying all the time, couldn't get out of bed. So I never really gave depression much thought this time around. I don't feel bad about taking them now. I know something has to give. Yesterday I was just so surprised that depression was the diagnosis when its nothing like it was before. But it doesn't matter what we call this as long as I can get to where I am not so anxious all the time over my son.
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Post by lisae on Feb 17, 2022 21:08:07 GMT
That's a valuable perspective. Thank you for sharing. Over the last few months, I've been prioritizing my physical issues. I never found out the cause of my pain despite an MRI but with a doctor's clearance, I've been exercising. I've done other things to prioritize my health after years of putting everyone else's health first. Doing many of these things isn't fun but necessary and I do like the way I feel now.
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Mystie
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,300
Jun 25, 2014 19:53:37 GMT
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Self love
Feb 17, 2022 22:49:44 GMT
via mobile
Post by Mystie on Feb 17, 2022 22:49:44 GMT
When I went through cancer treatment in 2020, they told me to rest but also told me to try tobe as active as I felt able. 😄 How does one manage that?? Lol. Do you have anyone who can help you with some of those tasks that feel like a lot but also make you feel better about your surroundings? I went through chemo at the first height of covid, so we were isolating and perhaps you are, too, but if you feel safe, I'm sure a friend would love to come help. Wishing you strength and healing. I know, right? How does one manage that? I was also told that I needed to catch my first cold. How exactly does one go about catching a cold that isn't Covid? No, not really. The offers of help have disappeared. Actually they were always 'I would if I could but I can't' offers. The actual help never really happened because like you, we couldn't have people in the house because of the Covid restrictions all through it. I just did what I could. The house got dusty and messy, the iron hasn't been used for months but the bathroom/kitchen were kept clean and we ate OK. I'm gradually getting on top of it. I finished the chemo 5 months ago and clinically my immune system should be fine - technically I'm 'better' and that's what people expect. I had 3 months off, then started working from home in August and went back into the office in November. In reality I feel more fatigued now than I did when I was going through the chemo. I'm still having targeted biologicals and immunotherapy injections every 3 weeks until July, and they make everything hurt. My liver function is still iffy and my iron levels are low. I'm sleeping half the morning then creeping around like an old woman, and grunting, groaning and dropping things. I feel 80. How long did it take you to feel normal again? Thank you to you and also to @mikklyn with extra Well, "normal" is pretty subjective! I had radiation after chemo, so that prolonged the tiredness. And my father died six months after I finished chemo, so there was all of THAT. 2020 was ridiculously awful. My recovery was complicated emotionally which probably didn't help with the physical recovery, either. Cancer treatment is a body trauma, it just is, and I think one doesn't usually bounce right back. I would say I started getting trickles of energy back about four months after chemo ended. After 10-12 months, I felt almost 100%. I took afternoon naps for months after everything was over. (And during everything!) I started to think I'd be napping forever, but I got to a point where I didn't need the extra rest any more. But my after-treatment isn't as complex as yours sounds. I have a shot every four weeks to stop hormone production and a daily pill. I take iron, calcium and vitamin D. If your iron levels are low, surely that would make you more tired. It sounds like you're doing as well as you can. I still have random days where I'm exhausted, but they're getting fewer and fewer, thankfully. I'm sorry you don't have more help...I think when you're out of the "crisis" phase, people kind of forget about you. That happened to me, too. Wish I could zap over and give you a hand.
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Post by slowjoe on Feb 18, 2022 3:51:20 GMT
… anyone else think this thread was going to be more Steph-related? 😂😂😂 Yup because that's straight where my mind goes when I see the phrase 'self love'. 2006 Me would've definitely thought up an inappropriate joke here. 2022 Me still does that, but doesn't post it.
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mamapeaah
Full Member
Posts: 326
Sept 30, 2021 4:39:02 GMT
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Post by mamapeaah on Feb 18, 2022 14:36:35 GMT
Is Steph the pure romance hun? Does she still post here?
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janeinbama
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,202
Location: Alabama
Jan 29, 2015 16:24:49 GMT
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Post by janeinbama on Feb 18, 2022 15:45:12 GMT
I am fighting this battle now. I am retiring after 33 years at my job. Joyful time, looking forward to the future and we are prepared financially. My mother moved into Assisted Living in November and after a recent hospital stay is in rehab for 30 days. She will be moving into LTC effective Feb 28....the day I retire. I am really struggling with my the joy I feel for retiring and the sadness I feel for my mother. My Dad died suddenly at 53, he didn't get to retire and I want to retire for "both" of us.
My sister and I both are struggling. I am unable to focus on healthy eating. I do exercise and do stretching, just not controlling my food intake. I know self care is not Thin Mint cookies, but damn they tasted good last night!
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RedSquirrelUK
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,899
Location: The UK's beautiful West Country
Aug 2, 2014 13:03:45 GMT
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Post by RedSquirrelUK on Feb 18, 2022 23:27:13 GMT
I know, right? How does one manage that? I was also told that I needed to catch my first cold. How exactly does one go about catching a cold that isn't Covid? No, not really. The offers of help have disappeared. Actually they were always 'I would if I could but I can't' offers. The actual help never really happened because like you, we couldn't have people in the house because of the Covid restrictions all through it. I just did what I could. The house got dusty and messy, the iron hasn't been used for months but the bathroom/kitchen were kept clean and we ate OK. I'm gradually getting on top of it. I finished the chemo 5 months ago and clinically my immune system should be fine - technically I'm 'better' and that's what people expect. I had 3 months off, then started working from home in August and went back into the office in November. In reality I feel more fatigued now than I did when I was going through the chemo. I'm still having targeted biologicals and immunotherapy injections every 3 weeks until July, and they make everything hurt. My liver function is still iffy and my iron levels are low. I'm sleeping half the morning then creeping around like an old woman, and grunting, groaning and dropping things. I feel 80. How long did it take you to feel normal again? Thank you to you and also to @mikklyn with extra Well, "normal" is pretty subjective! I had radiation after chemo, so that prolonged the tiredness. And my father died six months after I finished chemo, so there was all of THAT. 2020 was ridiculously awful. My recovery was complicated emotionally which probably didn't help with the physical recovery, either. Cancer treatment is a body trauma, it just is, and I think one doesn't usually bounce right back. I would say I started getting trickles of energy back about four months after chemo ended. After 10-12 months, I felt almost 100%. I took afternoon naps for months after everything was over. (And during everything!) I started to think I'd be napping forever, but I got to a point where I didn't need the extra rest any more. But my after-treatment isn't as complex as yours sounds. I have a shot every four weeks to stop hormone production and a daily pill. I take iron, calcium and vitamin D. If your iron levels are low, surely that would make you more tired. It sounds like you're doing as well as you can. I still have random days where I'm exhausted, but they're getting fewer and fewer, thankfully. I'm sorry you don't have more help...I think when you're out of the "crisis" phase, people kind of forget about you. That happened to me, too. Wish I could zap over and give you a hand. Aw thank you. I wish I could nap but I have to be feeling really poorly to be able to fall asleep in the daytime. Even during the chemo I don't think I napped more than a couple of times and that was when I was throwing up. I just sleep in for hours when I can, and walk around like a zombie, all sandy-eyed and not thinking straight. I was having a bad pain day yesterday. Today I have less pain and I feel better about everything. Thank you for the encouragement. It will get better, I know.
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