For the love of all that is effing holy - quit arguing!

I see the irony of commenting on this thread when I lost my ever loving shit last week and derailed a few threads. In my defense, I was extremely ill and hopped up on some really fine drugs - I do try and be more measured in my responses typically and know when to let things go when clearly the discussion has become a big hot mess. There is some truth to kibblesandbits post, but disagree that papercrafteradvocate is one of the offenders for abusiveness. There's give and take there, really the hardest part for me as a reader of her posting style is coming back to a contentious thread after some time away and quoting like 10 things in a row. I get wanting to respond, but if you're not there for the back and forth, just read and respond in one post or two posts with a summary of your thoughts and responses (hey we're venting and it irritates me, I fully know you can do whatever you want). There are a couple much worse offenders who just fly into guns blazing and really the sad part is right now they can't even listen when they're posting inaccurate information as they're too busy being right and schooling someone. pinklady just relishes being the 2peas bitch and coming in cursing, so if you don't like that posting style, block her.

are you logged in?

The point of this thread is "arguing", yet here you are.  I wonder what it would look like if you were to view your comments in the other thread from everyone else's viewpoint?  Why is it that everyone else read your post in a completely different way than you meant it? That's where we're going with this thread.  

I'm not interesting in arguing with you on a thread about arguing, lol.  Clearly we will disagree. 

I'm on Amazon now and it's 11.99

For anybody working it, Hivemind is on sale for the kindle for 3.99.

But ultimately there's a way to say controversial things without alienating a nice pea like Kiki.

I see the irony of commenting on this thread when I lost my ever loving shit last week and derailed a few threads. In my defense, I was extremely ill and hopped up on some really fine drugs - I do try and be more measured in my responses typically and know when to let things go when clearly the discussion has become a big hot mess. There is some truth to kibblesandbits post, but disagree that papercrafteradvocate is one of the offenders for abusiveness. There's give and take there, really the hardest part for me as a reader of her posting style is coming back to a contentious thread after some time away and quoting like 10 things in a row. I get wanting to respond, but if you're not there for the back and forth, just read and respond in one post or two posts with a summary of your thoughts and responses (hey we're venting and it irritates me, I fully know you can do whatever you want). There are a couple much worse offenders who just fly into guns blazing and really the sad part is right now they can't even listen when they're posting inaccurate information as they're too busy being right and schooling someone. pinklady just relishes being the 2peas bitch and coming in cursing, so if you don't like that posting style, block her.

I do think it is funny that someone (NOT THE OP) who is extremely rude and bombastic in their own way is calling others out for the exact same behavior they dish out in the guide of standing up for what is right.

That being said, there are maybe 4 or 5 posters out of all the people here who derail threads and just argue amongst themselves. I personally find the ignore feature plenty useful and just utilize that and have found my time here much more pleasant. I understand that the ignore feature does not work if you peruse the board via the app or such, but I just use it regularly via my browser because the ignore feature is that important to me.

Regarding standing up to bullies and such, being a bully back isn't terribly effective and seems to only increase tension and lead to more endless arguments. There are plenty of peas who call out nastiness and stand up for people without ever turning nasty themselves and that usually ends up with a mea culpa from the pea who was being a bitch. Of course, some just double down and then triple down, but that is when the ignore or just scroll by comes in handy.

Honestly, I get tired of these threads turning into a "All the peas are so nasty and mean, what happened to this place" nonsense. I am sure if the people saying that actually sat down and wrote themselves a private list of the peas that are arguing and turning everything political the number would be under 10 for sure, and I bet it is closer to 5. (And two of them primarily only post in political threads)

my daughter once told me about ... maybe some article she read that talked about a social score, sort of like a credit score. seems like we need a social score here and other places around the internet. so many downvotes and you disappear, maybe for a short while, maybe for a long while.

on another forum i read, seems there are people there just to make rude comments. it is all anonymous, but i think a system of up/downvoting might be helpful.

Yes well maybe those people need to take a break from the board instead of the rest of us who want to enjoy our time here.

Maybe that should be our code phrase? "I think you need to step away from the board/thread"