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Post by epeanymous on Apr 18, 2022 20:52:12 GMT
My father opted for a military funeral with a short graveside service. Does anyone have any ideas for something I can do for the funeral or for my mother that would be a show of love and respect? Flowers are a no-go; am looking for something that would be nice, and am stumped for ideas.
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Post by myshelly on Apr 18, 2022 21:27:35 GMT
A beautiful, personalized case for the flag that will be presented to her by the military.
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MDscrapaholic
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,592
Location: Down by the bay....
Jun 25, 2014 20:49:07 GMT
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Post by MDscrapaholic on Apr 18, 2022 21:37:35 GMT
My cousin read a story about her mother's life at her funeral - it was so good! We were all laughing and crying at the memories, some of which we didn't know. She had copies made and everyone got one. Perhaps you could do something like that?
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dawnnikol
Prolific Pea
'A life without books is a life not lived.' Jay Kristoff
Posts: 8,428
Sept 21, 2015 18:39:25 GMT
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Post by dawnnikol on Apr 18, 2022 22:02:45 GMT
A beautiful, personalized case for the flag that will be presented to her by the military. This. My Grandmother still has my grandfather's flag. |
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Post by Megan on Apr 18, 2022 22:34:29 GMT
A beautiful, personalized case for the flag that will be presented to her by the military. In time if you're able - we have a family member's uniform professionally framed with all the ribbons/badges/etc (how embarrassing that I can't remember what they're called!) |
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 7, 2024 5:14:05 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2022 22:42:31 GMT
A beautiful, personalized case for the flag that will be presented to her by the military. I agree! I have DH's flag in a plastic covering. I keep meaning to look for a personalized case for his flag. Great idea.
epeanymous : Again, I'm so sorry for your loss. xo |
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Post by littlemama on Apr 18, 2022 23:10:26 GMT
We have a non-personalized case for fil's flag and then I made a shadow box with all of his military regalia (i cant recall the right word either!), along wity a few other trinkets and a small container of his ashes.
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Post by jenjie on Apr 18, 2022 23:15:04 GMT
I’m so sorry about your dad. The others have given good suggestions.
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Post by mikklynn on Apr 19, 2022 12:42:17 GMT
epeanymous I am so sorry for your loss. May I suggest going home with your mom after the service? I know from experience when they say short graveside service it is literally 15 minutes, due to how busy the military cemeteries are. I was pretty wrecked after DH's burial. Going home with DD and talking for a few hours made a huge difference.
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maryannscraps
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,791
Aug 28, 2017 12:51:28 GMT
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Post by maryannscraps on Apr 19, 2022 14:10:16 GMT
I agree with the case for the flag. It's something I treasure from my dad's funeral.
Perhaps go out to lunch after (keeping it small) and sharing memories? My aunt did that when her mom died - it was only 5-6 of us, and it was very special to her. Just a quiet table at a nice restaurant on the water in the town where her mom grew up.
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Post by epeanymous on Apr 19, 2022 14:19:05 GMT
epeanymous I am so sorry for your loss. May I suggest going home with your mom after the service? I know from experience when they say short graveside service it is literally 15 minutes, due to how busy the military cemeteries are. I was pretty wrecked after DH's burial. Going home with DD and talking for a few hours made a huge difference. We are having her and other relatives over for brunch. ETA: the “other relatives” are just her sister, my cousin, and his husband. It is going to be really small. |
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Post by trixiecat on Apr 19, 2022 14:31:56 GMT
We took two canvases and put a variety of pictures of my dad on them at different stages of his life. I know you are not having an indoor service, but maybe your mom would like to look at them in the days and months after the funeral. My dad died two months ago and my mom tells me she looks at his pictures every day. I agree also with staying with her for several days or a week. Or if you live locally spend time with her every day. My dad and mom did everything together and spent 99% of their time together. She says she is bored now that he is gone (she is in assisted living). I think it is more that she misses the companionship because she does various activities every day.
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Post by piebaker on Apr 19, 2022 14:36:42 GMT
epeanymous - please accept my condolences. I think the protective case will be a beautiful holder for the flag your mother will receive.
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Post by voltagain on Apr 19, 2022 14:50:56 GMT
My father opted for a military funeral with a short graveside service. Does anyone have any ideas for something I can do for the funeral or for my mother that would be a show of love and respect? Flowers are a no-go; am looking for something that would be nice, and am stumped for ideas. This time in 2020 we lost my dad to covid. The things my mom still treasures most is the time my sister and I took to help her with a wide variety of tasks from helping get the house hold bills paid, helping sort through all the medical bills (what was paid by insurance, what she needed to pay, what to wait on until it had been through the insurance) helping with yard work and just being there to cry, to remember, to listen. Then April of last 2021 we lost my uncle. Same thing for my aunt (they had no children) has been for us nieces and nephews to simple be there with her. Have a meal with her, watch her favorite tv shows with her, help with yard work, things that she isn't mentally/emotionally fully functional to deal with. Grief can really mess with the mental ablity to focus or comprehend things that are a bit complex. |
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Post by scrapmaven on Apr 19, 2022 15:47:32 GMT
I don't have any ideas other than a big board w/photos from your dad's life and maybe a saying that would honor him. The greatest comfort you can give to your mother is to hold her hand during the services. I'm so sorry about the loss of your father.
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maryannscraps
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,791
Aug 28, 2017 12:51:28 GMT
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Post by maryannscraps on Apr 19, 2022 18:02:13 GMT
Can you put together a slide show? At the luncheon following my Dad's funeral, we set up a looping slideshow on a tv set on a table with a few chairs. Those chairs were occupied the entire time -- people like to reminisce over photos. Does you mom have older photos you can scan? It worked really well for us, partly because my grandfather and father were both prolific photographers. We had a ton of pictures that almost nobody had seen before.
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Post by Lexica on Apr 19, 2022 19:22:53 GMT
Many years before either of my parents passed away, I made a video of each of them, both separately and then together, basically asking them interview questions. A life story type of thing. I was in court reporting school at the time so I also took dictation of what they were saying for extra practice. I edited the video and the written text and gave a copy to each of my sisters.
When Dad passed, my sister used that video portion of Dad telling about his life before he met Mom, and added some stills from his younger years and military time, and then added the interview of the two of them together with more stills from over the years - their wedding, pictures taken with new grandbabies, and any special photos we each had. Mom did not want any type of actual service and Dad had been cremated so there was no graveside ceremony. We ended up gathering at my sister's home since it is the largest and we ate dinner and then she played that combined new video of Dad and then my parents together. We did send cards out to friends and family to let them know Dad was gone, but no funeral or fancy gathering at all. Mom was really happy with what we did.
I don't know if you have any video of your dad talking about himself and his life, but we found it very nice to watch. My dad had an amazing sense of humor so as we watched the little movie, we were going back and forth between laughing and crying.
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Post by jemali on Apr 19, 2022 19:30:26 GMT
We had teddy bears made out of some of my FIL and also MIL’s shirts.
They are so cute.
I have also seen pillows with a cute saying.
My SIL made a quilt out of her uncles ties.
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