AllieC
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,059
Jul 4, 2014 6:57:02 GMT
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Post by AllieC on Dec 31, 2022 4:59:20 GMT
I can’t fathom being an adult, being able to vote and enlist and fight for your country and not be able to have a drink.
OP, all the guests are of legal drinking age and your son can legally drink in your home so leave them to it.
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Post by malibou on Dec 31, 2022 8:00:58 GMT
I would have no issue with ds having friends over and they were drinking. I can't see me providing alcohol, but I would have ample food and nonalcoholic beverages available. Keys would be handed over on arrival and I would want them to spend the night unless they were being picked up by someone sober. And if they want to smoke pot outside, no problem there either.
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joelise
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,649
Jul 1, 2014 6:33:14 GMT
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Post by joelise on Dec 31, 2022 11:51:35 GMT
I’d have no problem with letting your eldest have a drink but then I’m British! It’s legal for a child over 5 to have a drink in the home. It’s also legal for anyone over 16 to have a glass of wine with a meal in a public establishment. Anyone over 18 can drink anything. With regards to drink driving I don’t know anyone who is a young adult that would drink and drive, it’s not in their culture here. It’s more likely to be someone older who would drink and drive.
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Post by monklady123 on Dec 31, 2022 12:09:39 GMT
If you told everyone that drinking is absolutely forbidden in your house (which you didn't, but I'm just saying *if* you did...) then they're probably go somewhere else. So I think it's much better to have everyone there where you can know what's going on. lol. Everyone else is 21, and as you said it's legal to allow your own kid to drink in your own home, and no one will be driving... So just lay down some rules ahead of time with your kid, and try to enjoy having a house full of people. lol
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SweetieBsMom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,618
Jun 25, 2014 19:55:12 GMT
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Post by SweetieBsMom on Dec 31, 2022 13:14:56 GMT
I'd let him drink, he's 20 and all of his friends are 21. However, as someone said: Once you start drinking you're staying (and I would be collecting keys immediately). I'd make sure there was plenty of food but I wouldn't supply the alcohol. I wouldn't hide away but I also wouldn't be checking on/bothering them either.
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,630
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Dec 31, 2022 13:56:09 GMT
Hmmmm, my answer may not be popular with a lot of Peas, but this is the norm for most people I know IRL. Here the legal drinking age is 18. If you have a party with kids younger than 18, and there will be drinking, the parents can sign a consent form to say their kids are allowed to drink. We let our kids drink at our house or someone else's house when they were 17. A lot of parents allow it at 16. (Actually, come to think of it, I think we let DS drink at 16.) Most parents would only let their under age kids take two drinks. This is from my state's Legal Aid page, just so you know I'm not making it up! Maybe it's because our legal drinking age is 18, and maybe because most kids drink at 16 or 17, but I find the idea of not letting adults of 20 and 21 drink is really really weird.I would definitely make sure that none of them are going to driving home after drinking. I agree with you. I grew up when the drinking age was 18, which meant I was drinking at 14, 15. I learned a healthy respect for alcohol based on mistakes made (oh, God I still can't even smell a rum and coke) and was never a binge drinker or abuser (and I'm now pretty much a teetotaler.) But still - they aren't getting in cars if they've consumed alcohol in my home. We have social hosting laws in our state and could be held responsible if something went wrong.
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seaexplore
Prolific Pea
Posts: 8,466
Apr 25, 2015 23:57:30 GMT
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Post by seaexplore on Dec 31, 2022 16:02:25 GMT
Collect the keys and let them have fun.
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iowgirl
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,144
Jun 25, 2014 22:52:46 GMT
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Post by iowgirl on Dec 31, 2022 16:21:50 GMT
If no one is driving after drinking - enjoy the fun!
I have never made alcohol a taboo in my house. I let my kids drink alcohol from a fairly young age (15-16 ish) at home. Maybe a half glass of wine, or a cold can of beer after baling hay. That is not illegal in my state - as long as they are at my home under my supervision. I NEVER let anyone else's kids have any alcohol though. This was strictly when they were doing things with us as family time. I felt that by not making alcohol taboo - they would not go absolutely nuts when they did have access to it unsupervised. And that approach worked! My kids have always been responsible about drinking. Not that they didn't do their fair share of partying - but they made sure to be with trusted friends and to Uber or call for a ride.
There have been a few NYE parties at my house, thrown by my kids. No one drove home. The deal was that they had to hang out with me for a while the next day and have brunch... LOL
My kids are all adults now and their friends frequently drop by when they are in the area. We really developed a deep friendship with all of them. Now the talk is of careers, weddings, babies and life. OH the JOY!
Embrace this experience!
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Post by scrapmaven on Dec 31, 2022 17:15:54 GMT
Growing up, my parents allowed us to drink. We'd take sips only, but as teens we could have a glass of wine or small scotch at home. Why? Cause if we could drink at home then it wasn't a big mystery and it took all of the desire to drink away. Though we never served alcohol to friends at that age. As it turns out, I never liked the taste of alcohol, so I never drank anyway. My mother never drank for the same reasons. ITA w/the way we were raised.
20 somethings are gonna drink whether at home or elsewhere. Better they should drink in a safe environment than out where they'd be in a car. Let them drink, cause if they can't drink at your house they could just go somewhere else.
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Post by peachiceteas on Dec 31, 2022 17:24:42 GMT
Maybe it's because our legal drinking age is 18, and maybe because most kids drink at 16 or 17, but I find the idea of not letting adults of 20 and 21 drink is really really weird. Me too. I was going to refrain from posting on this thread for that reason but I'm glad that we share the same thought on it. When I was 20, I was living away from home full time in a big city and had been for two years. My parents had pretty much had no say in what I did. My parents actually used to buy me alcohol to take to parties when I was 16/17. They always had the outlook that they would rather know exactly what I was consuming in what quantity, than give me reason to go behind their backs. It worked. I never hid alcohol from them, never caused trouble and never sat on a park bench in the cold drinking alcohol that we'd convinced someone to buy us (unlike quite a few of my friends).
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Post by Darcy Collins on Dec 31, 2022 18:43:12 GMT
Half of my daughter's friend group has already turned 21 the rest will turn 21 in the next month or two. I have zero issue with them having some NYE champagne. We've hosted here for the last 3 or 4 years and even when drinking wasn't an issue we highly encouraged everyone just staying over as the others on the road are a huge concern and I didn't really want a bunch of teens driving at 2 in the morning. We absolutely have the no one leaves after drinking absolutely anything.
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milocat
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,443
Location: 55 degrees north in Alberta, Canada
Mar 18, 2015 4:10:31 GMT
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Post by milocat on Dec 31, 2022 21:29:21 GMT
Maybe it's because our legal drinking age is 18, and maybe because most kids drink at 16 or 17, but I find the idea of not letting adults of 20 and 21 drink is really really weird. I would definitely make sure that none of them are going to driving home after drinking. Agree with all this. Kids here drink a few years under the age of 18. I can't imagine letting or not letting an almost 20 year old and their over 21 friends drink. I would go into a different room, if the living room was the only place for them to hang out. I don't want to hang out with drunk 21 year olds.
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Post by refugeepea on Jan 1, 2023 3:34:14 GMT
We don’t really do the “this is *my* house” thing. My kids live here, it’s just as much their house as it is my house. When they have friends over, I want them to feel like it’s their house and they’re the host, so I go in my bedroom, shut my door, they have the run of the house and if they need or want anything, they text me. I thought you had young children? All boys? Maybe I'm thinking of another pea.
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Post by epeanymous on Jan 1, 2023 4:55:11 GMT
Maybe it's because our legal drinking age is 18, and maybe because most kids drink at 16 or 17, but I find the idea of not letting adults of 20 and 21 drink is really really weird. I would definitely make sure that none of them are going to driving home after drinking. Agree with all this. Kids here drink a few years under the age of 18. I can't imagine letting or not letting an almost 20 year old and their over 21 friends drink. I would go into a different room, if the living room was the only place for them to hang out. I don't want to hang out with drunk 21 year olds. We have a big finished basement so they are hanging out down there like it's the 1970s. They are evidently drinking hard seltzer tonight. Weirdly, none of them wanted the craft cocktails we worked on for a half hour .
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