|
Post by mikklynn on Aug 10, 2023 13:16:27 GMT
We paid a deposit at a care facility for skilled nursing care for my dad with Parkinsons. My mom would go to assisted living in same facility. We are in the middle of packing them for the move in 2 weeks, preparing for an auction, and then the sale of their home.
The F'ING facility just called my sister late yesterday to say they can't take dad as he requires too much care. WTAF??? We told them exactly what he needs - help going to bathroom, getting dressed, showering, and getting in/out of bed. This is a PARKINSONS specialty care facility. To say my sister lost it on them is an understatement. Apparently they just finally looked at his records from the current care facility.
I am venting, not looking for advice, except for like on my other thread - how do I not lose my mind.
I am checking out another place today that we looked at previously. They are actually trying to make an exception to get dad in. Thank you to A Place for Mom that is very helpful.
Seriously, I am losing my mind here. Thank God I have a good therapist.
|
|
MorningPerson
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,579
Location: Central Pennsylvania
Jul 4, 2014 21:35:44 GMT
|
Post by MorningPerson on Aug 10, 2023 13:31:42 GMT
How infuriating and stressful to say the least. Hopefully this will be resolved very soon.
|
|
chendra
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,901
Location: The 33rd State
Jun 27, 2014 16:58:50 GMT
|
Post by chendra on Aug 10, 2023 13:48:39 GMT
How aggravating! I'm not an expert in nursing or care facilities, but those seem like basic needs for a skilled nursing facility. Are they understaffed?
|
|
|
Post by elaine on Aug 10, 2023 14:08:44 GMT
I’m so very sorry. (((Hugs)))
It is beyond tragic that in one of the wealthiest countries in the world, our care facilities for the elderly, ill, disabled, and mentally ill citizens are lacking in so many things, especially lack of the facilities themselves and the level of care that those facilities offer.
|
|
katybee
Drama Llama

Posts: 5,610
Jun 25, 2014 23:25:39 GMT
|
Post by katybee on Aug 10, 2023 14:12:43 GMT
That is crazy. Do they kick patients out when they decline?
|
|
|
Post by allison1954 on Aug 10, 2023 14:17:58 GMT
That is crazy. Do they kick patients out when they decline? Yes they sometimes do. My MIL was not accepted into assisted living because of the care needed. So had to go into a part of the facility with lower care ratios. And much more cost to accommodate that. Or move them to a different part of the facility if they have that available. Esp for memory care. Not all facilities have that.
|
|
Just T
Drama Llama

Posts: 6,145
Jun 26, 2014 1:20:09 GMT
|
Post by Just T on Aug 10, 2023 14:19:08 GMT
This just happened yesterday to my dad! My mom and sister have been trying to find a nursing home for him for when he is kicked out of rehab. They live in a small town, and there aren't a lot of good choices nearby. I already wrote about the crappy one in my other post. Well, they found one they really like last week, and they found out yesterday that the nursing home doesn't want him because he requires too much care! A nursing home! So weird...so now they are back to looking.
|
|
|
Post by mom on Aug 10, 2023 14:33:48 GMT
I am so sorry! This must be so frustrating!
That said ---- it is much, much better that you find out now that they cannot handle what he needs than to find out later when it would be much more tramuatizing to move him again or something horrific happen because they couldn't meet his needs.
Keep your head up! You will find a better place for him and your mom that will allow him to get the care he needs and deserves!
|
|
|
Post by littlemama on Aug 10, 2023 14:44:40 GMT
That is crazy. Do they kick patients out when they decline? They may move them to a more care-intensive unit or if they dont have one, they may require them to be transferred to a facility that does. They are not "kicking patients out" they are ensuring that the patients can receive the level of care they need.
|
|
|
Post by mom on Aug 10, 2023 14:47:52 GMT
How aggravating! I'm not an expert in nursing or care facilities, but those seem like basic needs for a skilled nursing facility. Are they understaffed? I am definitely not defending the facility (they should have done their homework before accepting her dad), but there are state/federal requirements that determine where a senior goes. A 'skilled facility' is typically where someone goes to get help with their condition (Parkinsons) and it's possible they can recover enough to eventually go home vs. getting help for everday needs of getting older. Nursing Homes are where you get the most help with everyday needs like showering, toilet help, etc but they are also for those who aren't going to get better. And add in if Medicaid is ever expected to have to help chip in money (I DO NOT KNOW THIS IS THE CASE), then they can regulate where they go as well, and limit what they pay for. Its all a big a$$ headache, all the way around.
|
|
|
Post by littlemama on Aug 10, 2023 14:48:05 GMT
This just happened yesterday to my dad! My mom and sister have been trying to find a nursing home for him for when he is kicked out of rehab. They live in a small town, and there aren't a lot of good choices nearby. I already wrote about the crappy one in my other post. Well, they found one they really like last week, and they found out yesterday that the nursing home doesn't want him because he requires too much care! A nursing home! So weird...so now they are back to looking. 1. He isnt being "kicked out of rehab". He is being discharged. 2. From, there, he would go to a Skilled Nursing Facility (SNF) and receive rehab services while there. Skilled Nursing Facilities can have short term care and/or long term care. 3. If the "nursing home" you are looking at doesnt have rehab services, he cant go there and receive services. Hence why he would require "too much care". In reality, it is that they do not offer the services he needs.
|
|
wellway
Prolific Pea
 
Posts: 9,203
Jun 25, 2014 20:50:09 GMT
|
Post by wellway on Aug 10, 2023 14:51:05 GMT
That sounds like the most basic care you could expect, I guess, irritating as it is, that it is better to find out now before he moves in that the care would not be good enough.
Good luck with finding a better place.
|
|
|
Post by librarylady on Aug 10, 2023 14:55:08 GMT
I am sorry you are having this experience.
We had the same problem when my mother needed care. At least 5 facilities rejected her because she needed lots of care.
|
|
ashley
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,571
Jun 17, 2016 12:36:53 GMT
|
Post by ashley on Aug 10, 2023 14:57:29 GMT
I’m so sorry, that sounds incredibly stressful, and I know I wouldn’t have been prepared for a decision like that.
|
|
Just T
Drama Llama

Posts: 6,145
Jun 26, 2014 1:20:09 GMT
|
Post by Just T on Aug 10, 2023 15:06:22 GMT
This just happened yesterday to my dad! My mom and sister have been trying to find a nursing home for him for when he is kicked out of rehab. They live in a small town, and there aren't a lot of good choices nearby. I already wrote about the crappy one in my other post. Well, they found one they really like last week, and they found out yesterday that the nursing home doesn't want him because he requires too much care! A nursing home! So weird...so now they are back to looking. 1. He isnt being "kicked out of rehab". He is being discharged. 2. From, there, he would go to a Skilled Nursing Facility (SNF) and receive rehab services while there. Skilled Nursing Facilities can have short term care and/or long term care. 3. If the "nursing home" you are looking at doesnt have rehab services, he cant go there and receive services. Hence why he would require "too much care". In reality, it is that they do not offer the services he needs. His insurance company is kicking him out of rehab. They won't pay for a skilled nursing facility, either. They say he won't get any better with rehab, so they won't pay for it.
|
|
|
Post by malibou on Aug 10, 2023 15:38:29 GMT
Damn, that must have been an awful call for your sister to have to take. Keeping you all in my thoughts while you get this figured out.
|
|
|
Post by Scrapper100 on Aug 10, 2023 15:43:28 GMT
Hugs how absolutely infuriating and frustrating. I hope you find a place soon and can relax and feel some peace that they are in a good safe place.
|
|
Rhondito
Pearl Clutcher
MississipPea
Posts: 4,950
Jun 25, 2014 19:33:19 GMT
|
Post by Rhondito on Aug 10, 2023 16:03:37 GMT
I'm so sorry for all of you! I can only imagine the added stress on top of an already stressful situation. I agree with Mom though, better to find out now than after he's there and something happens because they can't care for him properly. Best of luck in finding him a better place!
|
|
|
Post by nightnurse on Aug 10, 2023 16:10:22 GMT
I feel your frustration but the fault lies with the system. There is no “kicking out of rehab” it’s graduating out, where the patient will no longer see further benefits and so they don’t meet the requirements for continued stay. It’s all about money. And republicans continue to cut funding and allow for profit insurance companies and care facilities dictate the level of care patients qualify for. It was heart breaking to tell patients they could no longer continue with skilled rehab and had to transition to long term care. And yes most LTC is short staffed, because we won’t pass legislation to mandate staff ratios because the corporations paying their ceos bonuses pretend they can’t afford it and lobby against it. I remember calling my state rep when they were voting on cutting funding for home care. I warned him that seniors want to stay at home, that we wouldn’t save any money because if they weren’t getting home care they’d end up in the Ed and he told me “with all due respect, you don’t know what you’re talking about” nah what do I know, it’s just what I’ve done for work the last 30 years ago. I think until the general public needs a LTC they have no idea. Most insurance doesn’t cover it. Medicaid takes the patients assets (lots of kids living in moms house shocked that the house would have to be sold to pay for LTC). All the while people vote against their own interests or don’t pay attention. It’s not an exaggeration to say that health care is on the verge of collapse. Every state has some type of elder care service and an ombudsman who over sees nursing homes. They should be able to help find a place for your dad. But it isn’t easy. Despite my connections and knowledge, I had to bring my grandfather to the ED and get him admitted to hospital so the hospital would have to find him a nursing home (he had an injury that warranted the Ed but then the ED had no sage discharge plan so he had to stay in the hospital for months until a bed opened)
|
|
Kerri W
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,836
Location: Kentucky
Jun 25, 2014 20:31:44 GMT
|
Post by Kerri W on Aug 10, 2023 16:19:52 GMT
How aggravating! I'm not an expert in nursing or care facilities, but those seem like basic needs for a skilled nursing facility. Are they understaffed? I am definitely not defending the facility (they should have done their homework before accepting her dad), but there are state/federal requirements that determine where a senior goes. A 'skilled facility' is typically where someone goes to get help with their condition (Parkinsons) and it's possible they can recover enough to eventually go home vs. getting help for everday needs of getting older. Nursing Homes are where you get the most help with everyday needs like showering, toilet help, etc but they are also for those who aren't going to get better. And add in if Medicaid is ever expected to have to help chip in money (I DO NOT KNOW THIS IS THE CASE), then they can regulate where they go as well, and limit what they pay for. Its all a big a$$ headache, all the way around. Timidly raising my hand as the owner of a small assisted living facility. ALL OF THIS ^ We do not have the choice on what level of care we accept. It is not because we are understaffed or that we're trying to make more profit or that we're providing substandard care. The state has levels of operating certificates with oh so many regulations and laws for us to comply with. We cannot keep a resident who does not meet that criteria. If we do, and a surveyor visits, we lose our certificate of operation. It is very black and white. AS IT SHOULD BE to keep residents safe. That said-I'm sorry for the frustration the OP is experiencing. It is SO hard. And it doesn't sound like it was handled well on the part of the facility.
|
|
|
Post by Basket1lady on Aug 10, 2023 16:28:05 GMT
It’s incredibly Frustrating. Facilities are so short staffed now that a lot of times they can’t take patients because of the level of care they require so that could be part of the problem. My mother-in-law is in a skilled nursing facility for dementia and they have a heck of a time hiring staff. We pulled my father-in-law from his facility because they just couldn’t hire anybody to cook and they were feeding them Subway and pizzas every day.
I’m so sorry that you have to deal with this. I know it’s an hour away, but I know a good facility in St Peter if it comes to that.
|
|
DEX
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,438
Aug 9, 2014 23:13:22 GMT
|
Post by DEX on Aug 10, 2023 16:29:55 GMT
His insurance company is kicking him out of rehab. They won't pay for a skilled nursing facility, either. They say he won't get any better with rehab, so they won't pay for it. I used to work as a nursing home unit manager. Medicare is the entity that pays for rehab, not private insurance. There are so many rules and regulations that facilities are required to follow in order to receive Medicare reimbursement. Medicare only pays for a certain number of days and during that time the resident is evaluated periodically regarding their progress in rehab. If the resident is no longer making progress or refusing to participate in rehab (like my late husband did) the facility will no longer receive Medicare reimbursement and will be required to discharge the resident to a facility that will best meets their needs. Unless you have a private long term care insurance policy, residents are required to pay out of pocket for assisted living or nursing home care until the resident has exhausted nearly all their assets. Then the resident is eligible for Medicaid. Also, I think another reason the facility may not be able to care for either of the fathers in this scenario is that there is not enough staff to provide care. When I was a manager we would have to shut down blocks of rooms and admit fewer patients because we didn't have enough caregivers. When our state does it's annual health department inspection, one of the areas of deficit might be if there aren't enough staff. It reflects negatively on the facility's reputation when there is a deficit. I am so very sorry Just T and mikklynn . These situations are so frustrating.
|
|
Just T
Drama Llama

Posts: 6,145
Jun 26, 2014 1:20:09 GMT
|
Post by Just T on Aug 10, 2023 17:10:33 GMT
Medicare is the entity that pays for rehab, not private insurance. Why does my mom keep being told that the insurance company wants him to leave? His physician has appealed the insurance company's decision. My mom receives letters from the insurance company, not Medicare. It's all confusing, and I have learned a lot over the past few months.
|
|
|
Post by jemali on Aug 10, 2023 17:34:43 GMT
We had a hard time finding a place for my MIL too. She had diabetes and needed someone to check her blood and give her insulin. It was amazing how many places only had a nurse available during business hours Monday through Friday.
|
|
Lurkingpea
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,561
Apr 24, 2022 18:37:20 GMT
|
Post by Lurkingpea on Aug 10, 2023 17:38:08 GMT
I’m so very sorry. (((Hugs))) It is beyond tragic that in one of the wealthiest countries in the world, our care facilities for the elderly, ill, disabled, and mentally ill citizens are lacking in so many things, especially lack of the facilities themselves and the level of care that those facilities offer. And they are so expensive many simply can't afford them and there really isn't any financial help. It is just awful. OP I am sorry for your struggles.
|
|
lindas
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,488
Jun 26, 2014 5:46:37 GMT
|
Post by lindas on Aug 10, 2023 18:28:13 GMT
Medicare is the entity that pays for rehab, not private insurance. Why does my mom keep being told that the insurance company wants him to leave? His physician has appealed the insurance company's decision. My mom receives letters from the insurance company, not Medicare. It's all confusing, and I have learned a lot over the past few months. Like you I was extremely confused about my dad’s health ins. He is a retired firefighter and the union has their ins through Aetna so even though he has Medicare his primary is with Aetna. We had a major fight with the rehab center when my mom was there. Once she hit the 30 day mark they told my dad he would have to pay out of pocket for her to remain. I did so very careful reading of their benefits and at that time Aetna would continue to pay for long term care, the rehab place didn’t believe us even after putting her directly in touch with the ins co, it was a battle. Unfortunately the plan has since changed and that coverage is no longer part of his benefits.
|
|
|
Post by MichyM on Aug 10, 2023 18:33:25 GMT
mikklynn, I am so sorry. I cannot image how stressful this must be for you and your family. Hopefully finding the right fit won't be horribly difficult. <3
|
|
|
Post by lavawalker1 on Aug 10, 2023 18:34:36 GMT
Oh wow….. 😡. It’s stressful enough just going through all of this with parents, so sorry this happened. We are going to need to move my FIL from his memory care facility probably in the next year or so. It makes me nervous thinking about it. We also worked with A Place for Mom. Great and helpful organization!
|
|
|
Post by littlemama on Aug 10, 2023 19:18:42 GMT
1. He isnt being "kicked out of rehab". He is being discharged. 2. From, there, he would go to a Skilled Nursing Facility (SNF) and receive rehab services while there. Skilled Nursing Facilities can have short term care and/or long term care. 3. If the "nursing home" you are looking at doesnt have rehab services, he cant go there and receive services. Hence why he would require "too much care". In reality, it is that they do not offer the services he needs. His insurance company is kicking him out of rehab. They won't pay for a skilled nursing facility, either. They say he won't get any better with rehab, so they won't pay for it. That is an issue completely separate from the facilities. If he isnt making progress in PT and OT, then insurance will cut off his access to those services in any setting.
|
|
|
Post by jackietex on Aug 11, 2023 2:12:33 GMT
Hugs, you should not have to deal with such ineptitude. I hope wherever he ends up living, he is getting the best of care.
|
|