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Post by onelasttime on Dec 30, 2023 0:42:47 GMT
It’s the end of the year and there are whole bunch of lists of things one needs to do better or change for the new year. This one kind of stuck with me. One and three especially. 1. Stop overthinking. Overthinking tends to create mental clutter leading to unnecessary stress & preventing you from fully enjoying the present. By reducing overthinking you open yourself to clear thought and a more peaceful life.2. Stop neglecting your mental health. 3. Stop regretting the past. Release the grip of past regrets as they can’t be changed, and embrace the lessons learned. By letting go of regret you free yourself to focus on the opportunities that lie ahead.youtu.be/XWDoRfFGKJw?si=OopN8q4c1eGkM9OM
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Post by Bridget in MD on Dec 30, 2023 2:11:09 GMT
Interesting. But how does one stop overthinking? Serious question. Do you just make a knee jerk decision or only allow yourself x amount of time to ponder over something?
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Post by Linda on Dec 30, 2023 2:19:13 GMT
Interesting. But how does one stop overthinking? Serious question. Do you just make a knee jerk decision or only allow yourself x amount of time to ponder over something? I could be wrong but my takeaway is that once you've made the decision, it's made and don't keep pondering it and second guessing yourself and rethinking it...
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Post by lisae on Dec 30, 2023 2:36:42 GMT
If it were that easy, I would have stopped 1 and 3 already. I know they are bad for me but I can't just say I'll stop.
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mamallama
Full Member
Posts: 138
Sept 14, 2018 7:30:33 GMT
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Post by mamallama on Dec 30, 2023 5:38:23 GMT
I don’t feel like it’s realistic to say to just stop doing those things. I don’t think we are doing those things by choice. If I could stop doing them I absolutely would. But I don’t know how to stop. The not neglecting your mental health one is real advice.
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Post by jeremysgirl on Dec 30, 2023 10:32:18 GMT
Interesting. But how does one stop overthinking? Serious question. Do you just make a knee jerk decision or only allow yourself x amount of time to ponder over something? I started a thread here once on overthinking because I still don't think I understand it from a non-manic POV. You can search for the thread by my name, if you think that might help. For me, mania triggers obsessive thinking, ruminating to the point of paranoia. This to me is very bad but it means I'm sick. Many times my brain is moving so fast that it seems like it doesn't slow down to think about a single topic for a long period of time. It takes a lot of training to refocus myself. Overthinking to me is a good thing because it finally means I don't have to fight my brain to concentrate on one particular thing for a period of time and it is in this space that I feel like I can make the most rational decisions and put together my best arguments. I did not understand why this was a bad thing. In that thread I learned that many people are uncomfortable with that level of thinking because in them it produces a feeling of anxiety. And it seems particularly damaging to people who deal with an actual GA diagnosis, I assume much the same way that mania can lead me to obsessive thoughts that cause paranoia and delusions and are out of my control. If this is you, then the OPs second point about neglecting mental health applies. But most people don't realize that there are a lot of ways to recognize negative thinking and turn thoughts around. Psychologists and some life coaches can teach you strategies for doing so. Now I'm not going to sit here and tell you it is easy. It isn't. 23 years ago I started this with a therapist. And some days, the days when my brain is moving the fastest, it can be like a game of tennis, with Serena Williams, batting the crazy thoughts away. 😂 But it can be done. You don't always have to marinate on your negative thoughts, you don't have to accept them, you can turn them into positive thoughts that you deeply believe, and you can change your mood. It takes time, effort, and patience. But if it wasn't possible, I would be an even crazier mess of a person without control enough to even reply to a thread like this in a way that is coherent and kind. Good luck! ❤️
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Post by mollycoddle on Dec 30, 2023 11:35:57 GMT
I overthink a lot. But I realize that it is anxiety that is causing me to do so, and that helps me for some reason. Once I realize that it is my anxiety talking, I can put my thoughts into better perspective. I also practice being positive. So when I have a negative thought about something that I have to do, for example, I think of a positive side of it. Does it always work? Nope. But it frequently does.
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maryannscraps
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,737
Aug 28, 2017 12:51:28 GMT
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Post by maryannscraps on Dec 30, 2023 12:19:50 GMT
I agree with jeremysgirl in that you can change your overthinking, but it takes a lot of work and practice. I’ve been working on that sort of thing for years, and have had great success. I’m in a much better place for it. But it isn’t something you can just stop doing in the next few days. My three things would be: 1. Stop perusing the news and the internet by 7:00 in the morning. Time to get moving. 2. Stop talking myself out of going for a walk outside when it’s cold. I own jackets and gloves and will be perfectly comfortable. 3. Stop going to the grocery store at 4pm. It leads to lousy choices for dinner.
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Post by dewryce on Dec 30, 2023 13:56:55 GMT
I have a complex relationship with overthinking, so I’ll pass that one by for now.
Definitely agree with prioritizing mental health, 100%.
As for the third item, personally I have found it to be very helpful. I did a form of time line therapy that really concentrated on learning the lessons I needed from things I was holding onto from the past and it really did help me let go of the negative feelings stemming from a lot of things from my past. Not everything, there are a few issues I will need to dig deeper and do more intense therapy on, but even those were greatly improved.
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pantsonfire
Pearl Clutcher
Take a step back, evaluate what is important, and enjoy your life with those who you love.
Posts: 4,897
Jun 19, 2022 16:48:04 GMT
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Post by pantsonfire on Dec 30, 2023 14:15:26 GMT
I don't know...I think sometimes in my circumstances overthinking has been a good thing and helped me make sure my ds is getting the right care and right procedures.
This comes from a space of not always trusting the medical teams. Long back story on that one.
100% agree with 3. Very much yes.
And of course making your mental health a priority is very important.
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Post by femalebusiness on Dec 30, 2023 17:07:51 GMT
Over thinking has saved my butt several times. Sometimes when I keep thinking I come up with better solutions. I don't think I'll give that one up.
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Post by onelasttime on Dec 31, 2023 0:32:47 GMT
Over thinking has saved my butt several times. Sometimes when I keep thinking I come up with better solutions. I don't think I'll give that one up. I don’t disagree with what you are saying but , there is always a but, sometimes overthinking something can do as the guy who came up with it says can happen. And that is overthinking something that can lead to mental clutter that leads to unnecessary stress. I guess the trick is to know when one has reached a point where they are beating a dead horse and need to step away for a time.
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Post by Delta Dawn on Dec 31, 2023 0:44:55 GMT
Over thinking has saved my butt several times. Sometimes when I keep thinking I come up with better solutions. I don't think I'll give that one up. I don’t disagree with what you are saying but , there is always a but, sometimes overthinking something can do as the guy who came up with it says can happen. And that is overthinking something that can lead to mental clutter that leads to unnecessary stress. I guess the trick is to know when one has reached a point where they are beating a dead horse and need to step away for a time. Ruminating over and over is a horrible feeling. I have had that symptom before. Just stop thinking. (After the 6th hr).
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Post by dewryce on Dec 31, 2023 6:47:39 GMT
Over thinking has saved my butt several times. Sometimes when I keep thinking I come up with better solutions. I don't think I'll give that one up. Yep, more times than I can count. I try and avoid regrets and for me, I never regret thinking something through a lot more than the average bear, it comes naturally to me, is super helpful, and gives me a sense of control I need for so many reasons. But there have been many times where I’ve haven’t thought something through the way I normally would that I do regret. But I do recognize that there is a point where “really thinking something through” becomes overthinking in an unhealthy way, and I will admit I can’t always make that distinction. My MIL has an it’ll be fine attitude and it works for her personality (and frankly, her financial status because she can afford to fix whatever didn’t work). But that’ll never be me, and I’m okay with that. The article mentions overthinking can lead to less enjoyment of things. For me, looking for better ways to solve a problem is fun! My line for what is considered overthinking is probably much further out than most. Again, I recognize it can become unhealthy and I’m working on it. But Sue’s definition of overthinking is probably much different than mine. I stress out not knowing that I did everything I could to make the best decision possible.
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Post by onelasttime on Jan 5, 2024 18:15:41 GMT
Now we have gone from 3 things to stop in 2024 to 6 things to stop in 2024. I think I’ve been guilty of all 6 at one time or another. 1. Stop Overthinking 2. Stop regretting the past 3. Stop comparing yourself to others 4. Don’t fear change 5. Stop procrastinating 6. Stop negative self-talk youtube.com/shorts/hse8nLk8zg0?si=uH2HGaYTBE8dmmbq
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