Walking at a cemetery

I would walk there, but I would also be cognizant and respectful of visitors paying respects.

I walk in a cemetery. Lots do in same cemetery. I am respectful of avoiding any active burials. I actually notice obituaries mentioning upcoming burials so I can plan my walking time. This is a very large cemetery and I can pretty much avoid any gatherings at graves. I certainly don’t intend any disrespect. I have family members in a mausoleum there also. I check on their flowers and tell them how much I love and miss them while I am there. I know they wouldn’t have a problem with walkers.

I’m going to gently say you are being sensitive. I spend a lot of time at cemeteries. My sister is a photographer who volunteers tracking down gravestones to be photographed by requests from people doing genealogy. She’s been doing it for about 15 years. I often accompany her and have gotten a lot of exercise through this. We stay out of the way of funerals or people openly grieving. Just yesterday she went to a yoga class at a cemetery, it’s also classified as an arboretum and has beautiful lawns for this by the office. They do jazz nights where they string up lights and have live musicians play the music of the composers/musicians buried there. They also have honeybees and sell their honey. I think it’s nice to have life going on in a cemetery. I’m sorry for the loss of your daughter. I think you were annoyed because the loss is still so fresh.

I think Gar said it very well.

I do walk in cemeteries, but I wouldn't be doing noisy laps anywhere near someone who was obviously paying their respects. They are usually quiet and nicely-kept with plenty of birds and other wildlife. I'm interested in the graves, and I try to be respectful, not walking on the graves but between them. Our vicar encourages visitors and dog walkers. It's a pleasant place to be. We have church picnics in the garden of remembrance. Children run around and play, and people chat and laugh. It is a place for the living as well as those who have passed away.

One Sunday evening last winter I came out of the church after dark and there was a magnificent moon with a halo. I wandered through the silent beauty of the cemetery to find the best view for photos, and it wasn't until I had got the shots that it occurred to me that I was alone in a graveyard in the dark - and I wasn't scared. It felt holy, beautiful and full of God's presence.

I understand your feelings and I am sorry for your loss. I live in the country and there is a cemetery close to my house. I include in in one of my walks. I know quite a few people buried in this cemetery. Every time I walk there I think about those individuals. If there is a burial or someone is visiting a grave, I do not walk thru it out of respect.

I'm very sorry for your loss.

Yes, I might walk on the roads through and around the cemetery. The office building I used to work in was adjacent to a cemetery. Many people, including me, took walks on the roads through the cemetery during our lunch break. In this case it was the only place we could safely walk without a drive.

I would not walk at a cemetery. It would feel disrespectful to me.

You are not being too sensitive. I think if people want to walk in the cemetery, then they should show some respect. Be conscious of people who are there grieving. It is not a place to carry on fun and happy chatter in my opinion.

Hugs to you, I am sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how you are feeling.

I absolutely validate your feelings.

I don’t see anything wrong with respectfully walking or spending time otherwise in a cemetery. I have decorated, blown up plastic bunnies and Easter eggs, played cards with friends, taken a beloved pet to visit at night (no pets allowed in that one), painted my nails, done homework, read and goodness knows what else in cemeteries, especially the one my grandparents rest in.

I would never want to interrupt someone else’s experience, but that goes both ways. Walkers and chatters should take another route or at least hush as they move through others’ space.

My grandparents were those people that decorated their home and their yard for every single holiday. Always. Now, my mom, my Uncle or I make sure their grave is decorated. I had someone complain about my use of a Santa and reindeer on my grandparents grave. Eh. Some of their neighbors in life didn’t like some of their decorations either, so, we continue to decorate. We all live here together, even the families of those we miss terribly.

I get what you're saying, but I personally find cemeteries to be physically beautiful and great spaces for quiet walks and contemplation. I would never interfere with anyone who looked as if they're mourning. Connecticut cemeteries are also fascinating because many are so old. There is one nearby with gravestones from the 1600s.

This....my great nephew died shortly after birth in 2020 and he is buried in a cemetery not far from me. He is the first grave as you walk in so we have not had the issue you did.

I don't think you are being too sensitive and I'm so sorry for your loss.

Personally I wouldn't use a cemetery for exercise purposes; it just wouldn't seem right to me. However, I would go to visit a cemetery that I had no connection with because it was particularly beautiful either in landscaping or interesting headstones or for family history purposes. I wouldn't feel wrong just strolling around respectfully or taking discreet photographs.

When people in the community regularly walk through a cemetery, they can be an asset in noticing disrepair and keeping vandalism in check. I do think it's important to show sensitivity and respect to groups who are obviously there to grieve a loved one, but the presence of life and activity in a place that is focused on remembering the dead is a lovely thing to me. My perspective is shaped a bit because I grew up in a manse (father was the pastor) and our yard was bounded by a cemetery. It was a beautiful, quiet, interesting place where we were allowed to play and explore. I probably learned to form capital letters from tracing them on the gravestones. In the country where we were, it was common for people to come and picnic or bring small children to play in the cemetery while family members cared for the flowers and cleaned the stones. Knowing something about the various people buried there, from listening to stories shared by their loved ones, was very normalized, and probably a very healthy way of processing the loss.

I would take offense to people riding electrical equipment through a cemetery. I personally would not walk a dog there, though there isn't anything intrinsically disrespectful about a dog being present provided people clean up scrupulously behind them. I think throwing a frisbee would be uncouth. But walkers, even with lively chatter-- that would not bother me.

I am so very sorry about your daughter. I don't think you're being too sensitive at all. I would have been upset if I were at a gathering for the anniversary of my child's passing, and people were walking past chatting. It seems very disrespectful. 

Also, I honestly can't understand why people would be walking for exercise through a cemetery.  It would never occur to me to do that. Are there no other places to walk? I can see from the poll that I am well and truly in the minority though.