VENT... help me strangle my husband.

My grandmother almost strangled my grandfather when she caught him using her silver cake server to spread the mortar for a brick planter he was building.

I'm a quilter. For those that don't know, we spend $$$$ on fabric and hoard leftover pieces like its the apocalypse. I came home one night just before hunting season and DH was so proud of himself that he had made an archery target himself instead of paying for one. I asked what he filled it with and he said, oh, just those scraps in your craft room......My what?! Yep, he had taken my entire bin of fabric scraps and used them to stuff a box to shoot arrows through. Needless to say he went out right then and got the box. Luckily he'd only shot a few arrows through using practice heads and since they were mostly small scraps, he didn't ruin many large pieces of fabric.

ONLY because ultimately nothing had been damaged and I got them all back.  I was in shock and nearly had a heart attack in the time frame between realizing what he'd done and him bringing them back in the house.  He totally didn't understand why I was so upset over "scraps" but the fact that I was hyperventilating and all the blood had drained from my face impressed the importance upon him pretty quickly.

Men just don't think, do they?

My husband used my white towels to clean up spilled paint. Not sure what was going through his head at the time. 

The one that no longer is married to me used to clean by piling everything into a paper bag. "There, done."
He's moved on to make someone else miserable, thank goodness.

Oh yeah, this!  I just get up and go to my craft cave which is just around the corner!  

Yes my dear hubby - please do this 

Mine was about to try to cut through some thick plastic with my Cutter bees- he nearly lost his hand! I had forgotten to put them away...

I would like to think that I am raising some one's future husband...and tell my kids all the time that stealing my scissors (the good, fabric ones) is likely to end in divorce. LOL

For my birthday last year, my youngest son bought me new fabric scissors with a leopard print handle. He said this way he will never mistake them for the "kind he is allowed to use."

I just said this to my older one last nite!  I pointed out to him that if a woman tells him he hurt her feelings, DO NOT say "No I didn't".  Do not EVER invalidate her feelings that way.  Tell her you would never intentionally hurt her feelings and that you're sorry you did.  I won't even get into why we were having this conversation.

And now onto my vent.  A wasp got into the house yesterday afternoon and I insisted my husband kill it as it was buzzing angrily around my kitchen.  During his usual "I will, I will" (spoken while he is not), the thing landed.  Somewhere.  We couldn't find it.  I'm guessing it was on top of my cabinets (another reason to have cabinets that go to the ceiling!!).  I huffed out of the room.  A little while later I asked him if he had killed it and he said he had.  You know where this is going, right?  15 hrs. later, here I sit at my kitchen table, peaing and what do I suddenly hear?  That SOB, dying in my kitchen light fixture.  Now, we all know that there's no point in bringing this up to my husband because all he will say is "See?  It's all fine.  It didn't fly into the bedroom and bite you while you were sleeping.  It's all fine, sweetheart."  GRRRR!

That must have been a short conversation!

Here is my vent....I am cleaning house today and dh keeps asking me what he can do to help. So I tell him to clean the pile of papers off his dresser and he's got some excuse. He needs to look through the papers and find blah, blah, blah. Whenever I reply to his offers to help me, he has an excuse. I don't think he really wants to help!!!! He wants to feel like he's being helpful, but he doesn't really want to do any work, ugh.