aKathy's what's for Dinner. 8/11

Happy Monday dinner friends!

I've been absent for a while, my life feels so chaotic at the moment.

@tearici Big hugs and prayers for your and your family! I read your other thread, there will be an adjustment period. Your dad deserves and needs the love an attention now, but don't forget to take time for yourself also.

leannec I'm glad your mom is recovering quickly. I hope she is back in her home quickly.

Work is busy and I have a work and personal to-list that are both a mile long, I have two days at the office this week and leave for Indiana either Wednesday afternoon or Thursday morning.

Dinner? Good question! :-)

Wishing everyone a great day ahead!

I'm sure your voice is beautiful! Enjoy your lesson! And yeah, heatwaves suck. I was going to walk from my office building to the library and drop off some books, but it was too hot.



Take your leave however you need to. I took intermittent FMLA after Esther died and it was the perfect thing. Some days I felt like throwing myself into my work and other days I only could handle like 4 hours.



Good for you! Where you going? In September we are camping in the UP. I can't wait.

I'm making something tonight like kale, beans, acorn squash, I don't know what the grain is. But it looked good to me.

I woke up this morning at 3:30. It's only 12:30 and I feel exhausted. Got to hang in there until 3:30.

I just got home from swimming. The water was so refreshing.

Tearisci , I relate so much to what you are going through. My parents and sister all passed away after long battles with cancer (my dad) and Alzheimer's (mom and sister) so I had grieved their loss long before they passed away. Their passings were a blessing and that is something people can't understand unless they've been there. I think of you and your family every day.

I have Crazy Rummy this afternoon and thankfully, this is the last 100° day.

Dinner will be Snapper a la Joy.

Afternoon, everyone! Today is a Monday. But not in that crazy Monday way but the I am so tired and for no real reason tired. Well, I did walk around Memphis Ikea, Trader Joe's, Penzeys, Nordstrom Rack and Marshall's. I mentioned to my DD that my ankles are really hurting these days. She mentioned my arthritis may be moving into those joints. I think it has been there awhile as my mornings have been stiff for the last several years. This is an ache all day kind of thing. Something for me to remember to talk about in Sept at my rheumatologist visit. I also didn't sleep well last night. So I know that is adding to the tiredness.

There was more talk this weekend about moving up near my 2 oldest. I am thinking more seriously about it now. My DD said there are several admin positions on the campus where she is. She thinks that would be my best bet. But it makes my rheumatologist 2 hours away. He doesn't do too many telehealth visits and those docs are in a huge shortage here. But I have actually caught myself looking at houses and wondering how in the world I sell my house and buy a house. I have no payments whatsoever other than utilities, streaming services, and insurance/taxes. My ODS thinks I can sell my house at a higher amount than I really think it possible. I have at least $5k in a driveway repair so that's a consideration of selling. It's still a ways down the road thought but I am walking closer than I have and more realistically than I have in the past couple of months.

My DIL is in town this week working. She's to come by and grab a couple of things tomorrow night that I have for them. I need to start blowing and raking up all the dead pine straw that has decided to fall from heat/no rain. I need to go buy the paint for my front porch ceiling. So much that I need to get started on. I am trying to make myself write up a list and do one thing every night. Be it big or small. And I am tired of being an adult! My mother called me after I had already called her to check in on her on the drive home. "I meant to ask you something earlier but didn't want to get in your business." (then why call back and ask) "But did you buy insurance to pay off the car in case of death when you bought C's car?" Well, #1 I don't really know that that is a thing #2 there is no need, the car was paid off shortly after purchase. Mother, I own no one anything. "ohhhh, good, I have been so worried about you" I have already told her I am not in financial straits like she is and continues to put herself in. I also am certain she is telling her friends this information which was the reason we had a very heated and pointed call a few months back over. Y'all, I know I am lucky to have my mother around but she is just a lot of work. And most likely borderline if not all out narcissist. But there are just days I don't have the brain power to deal with her.

Whew, that was a lot to unpack in that paragraph. Let me get back to dinner. Unknown at this point. I did just get an email about crispy black bean tacos and that does sound so very yummy. If I have all the makings for that, that just may be dinner.

Not sure what kept me so busy this weekend. I missed a couple days.

naby64 have you ever been to the Metal Museum in Memphis? They have some classes I’d be interested in.
Is there something holding you back from moving sooner?

Big hugs Tearisci

Went with Luke Bennett & dd to see goats at the park this morning.
They’re using them to eat invasive vegetation. Then we tried to go to 2 diners. Both closed-it’s Monday.
Now I’m watching Juliet while dd has a meeting at school.

I’m making pasta in a fresh tomato sauce with shrimp and a peach/cherry burrata dish. And some salad.

Yesterday I went to a shower. Bride isn’t a bridezilla because she’s a spoiled only child and acts like one all the time. I felt bad for my bff.

Dd3 gets in tonight. We have 3 days of wedding venue visits this week.

Here’s my company this afternoon

They use them for fire prevention in our area so we see them for weeks in different locations. BUT, when they move them from location to location they often herd them (think 30-50+ goats) in the streets/sidewalks. You have to walk very carefully after they've passed.

Thank you so much. I'm wondering why I'm not crying and feeling kind of bad about it but at the same time, I know that her passing was a blessing. I've been in crisis mode for so long now that it feels weird to have some calmness. That will definitely take some getting used to.

Everyone grieves differently so I'm not going to say my experience is your experience. That's just rude. But I want to say that I really had a terrible struggle with this concept. I did grief therapy for over a year. It was like year after year I was in high anxiety crisis mode every single day wondering if this would be the day that Esther died. And then it happened and it was like that particular weight was lifted. The worst had happened and the near constant anxiety was gone. I still had it with Chloe, though. But I needed therapy to work through my complicated feelings on it.

And that is why I am somewhat thinking of it now. I am relatively good health and don't foresee the need but one never knows. I don't see my oldest ever moving from that area. I really don't see it with DD as her boyfriend is tied to a family business in track and field there. But as she said at some point, he could do that anywhere but I don't know that he would want to. My youngest moves back to the state in 2026 and he has emphatically stated it would not be back where I live. Also, where DIL parents live. He wants to be away from family so there are no drop-ins. We will see how that all works as the time gets closer.

In a completely different situation with my DH but I was pretty much the same. My grieving had been going on for a long time before the physical death. AND I get upset that people want to put me in a box of how "I should be feeling". Several widows here at church, "well you know how it is". No, no I don't. So all of this to say, you will process your mom's passing how you need to process it. Take all the emotions and don't take them the wrong way. Just accept them for what they are. Only you know how you feel and why. Big hugs to you.

Everyone! I'm really concerned about The Birdhouse Lady!

Where is she!   

Yes, but that was many months ago ...