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Post by KikiPea on Mar 3, 2015 16:26:29 GMT
today. What can I do to cheer him up? We will be going out for our weekly fajitas tonight.
He has had a hard few days at work as well. I would like to do SOMETHING, but I don't know what the something would be.
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MorningPerson
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,506 
Location: Central Pennsylvania
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Post by MorningPerson on Mar 3, 2015 16:30:11 GMT
You're sweet to want to help your husband through today.
Having lost my mother when I was in my early 20's, I really don't know of anything special that would have helped me, other than acknowledging the anniversary, maybe talking with your DH a little bit about some of your happy memories together with her, etc.
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Post by canadianscrappergirl on Mar 3, 2015 17:19:04 GMT
What about printing a favorite photo of him with his mom current or childhood and putting it in a nice frame for him, I think just acknowledging the day and letting him talk about his mom will be nice too!
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Post by gar on Mar 3, 2015 17:25:44 GMT
I was thinking about photos too. Maybe just taking a few favourites with you this evening and talking about the good times together. I'm sure he'll appreciate your thoughtfulness.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 7, 2024 13:46:09 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 3, 2015 17:34:26 GMT
Wild nookie tonight. Be nice to him all day long. Remember mom. Then dress up in something "sexy" tonight. He will love you for it.
I don't know, honestly. When my dad's mom died he wrote her off and never talked about her again. I just know her name. That's about it.
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Post by jenb72 on Mar 3, 2015 17:38:39 GMT
My SO lost his dad 11 yrs ago (it will be 12 come this June). It still rocks him every year and that day is not a good one for him. It's gotten better over time, but it will never go away.
In his case, I give him space because that's what he wants. He needs that day to mourn so that he can focus on the positive the other 364 days in the year. I don't try to cheer him up or make him snap out of it. He does that on his own when he's ready. And he knows I'm there for him, so I don't have to hover and ask him how he is. If he needs something from me, he will tell me.
He's often told me, days later, that he's glad I understand and don't make a big deal out of it.
Jen
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Post by Restless Spirit on Mar 3, 2015 17:41:34 GMT
Talk about her. Let HIM talk about her. Ask him to tell or retell his favorite moments and memories. Help him keep her memory alive.
I remember when my sister died, my mother told me that one of the things that made her the saddest was the people didn't seem to want to talk about her. It was like they forget she even existed. After that, I made a very concentrated effort to mention Kathy, not just on the day she died or her birthday, but many days. Until the day my mom died, we'd talk about Kathy. The things she loved. The things she hated. How stubborn she was. How smart and clever and witty she was. We'd laugh....and we'd cry. Most importantly of all, we would remember. I know that feeling of loss and remembrance well. My mom is gone now. My dad is gone. My sister is gone. But I have my memories. I cherish each one of those memories. And I'm so very, very fortunate that I have a wonderful husband that shares those memories with me.
Your DH's mother is in his heart, so help him remember her with love and honor and dignity. He'll love you for it.
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