Does emotional stress affect you physically?

I'm sorry for everything you are going through. That's a lot to deal with. '

To answer your question, for me, the answer is a resounding YES.

I once had a boss and we were just oil and water. It was a very unhealthy situation, but I loved the organization I worked for and I thought it would get better. About 18 months after she was hired, I started to have stomach issues. I underwent so many tests over the course of a year - every blood test you could imagine, endoscopy, colonoscopy, etc. - all to no avail. "Nothing" was wrong, but I was so sick. Finally, unrelated to my health issues, I decided I couldn't work with her any longer and found a new job. I gave my notice. The very next day, my stomach issues started to subside and by the time my two weeks were up and I left the job, I had no more stomach problems and they have never recurred. Basically, I was so miserably mentally, my body was turning on itself. Mind you, I'd had pain every day for over a year up until that point. It was a big wake up call for me.

As far as what do I do to make it better? I manage my stress better. Sometimes, there are situations that I have no control of but are still very stressful (like what you are going through). I make sure I talk through things with people I love and trust, to get things off my chest. I ask for help if i need it. I take extra good physical care of myself - being sure to get extra exercise and sleep even though it is tempting to skip those things because there's "not time." I find time - even just a little bit - to do something just for me. If they are situations I can control, I take action to change the situation so it will be less stressful - whether that means delegating, saying no, changing plans, or something else.

Looking back on my prior employment situation, there are a lot of things I could have done differently that would have better controlled my stress and probably helped my physical symptoms. I unfortunately thought it was better to just say/do nothing to change what was going on, keep on keeping on, and hope for the best. It was a terrible strategy for a number of reasons. 

If we ignore ourselves and our own emotional and physical needs, our bodies will eventually demand our attention and usually not in pleasant ways.

Yes it does. Last year was a very stressful time and our family spent 2 months in court. I stress ate myself into the fattest I've ever been in my life. I am the strong one. My family were relying on me for support. It was a horrible time. This year is better. I'm running away my frustrations this year. It's good for me.

When you said your DH had that kind of back pain I immediately thought of my next door neighbour. His back pain turned out to be lymphoma. He went for physio several times and that didn't make it better. He got blood work done and surprise.... if your DH just has a "bad back" from sitting in a plane too long then he can deal with that. Acupuncture or massage therapy and physio and other forms of therapy might help him.

I am sorry about your dad. I am truly sorry. My next door neighbour's wife is in the hospital with pneumonia from COPD (she never smoked a day in her life) but she has it and I don't think she is going to come home. She is elderly and she has had a wonderful, exciting, well-read, enough to write a book about life, but i suspect the end is near for her too

All I can do is pray for your family. I hope your dad improves. I really do. I hope DH's back gets better as well. He might just need to rest it. I don't know. Take good care. xoxox

ETA you need to be very gentle with yourself. If you have a jacuzzi tub, sit in it and read with soft music playing. If you exercise, try to do it as much as you can. Within reason. Deep breathe. Be gentler with yourself. There is only one you. You have Nick and you have DH (Kate is a school, right?) If you go to church talk to your pastor and see what he/she says. They can be very empathetic. They can give you scriptures to read that may be supportive. (If you are Jewish talk to your rabbi etc.) If the laundry doesn't get done, buy more underwear. I have had to do that before. I was in university at the time, but I was busy and didn't feel like doing laundry so I just bought more underwear. Easy peasy. Same goes for Nick and DH. Costco sells it cheaply, too. If you work you may need to take a leave of absence. I don't know if you can do that in the US or not. Here you can to take care of an ailing relative. That might be public servant rather than private. I don't know for sure either way. Do the bath thing as many times a day as you need to. Water isn't that expensive and it does calm you down. If you are religious pray. If your are spiritual I would get a book like a chicken soup book or something like that. It's fluff and happy. 

i just saw your question about accupuncture, so I'll tell u how great my experience was! Mine was from an excellent chiropractor ....I had severe back pain where I could barely walk or sit ....after adjustments, they placed muscle stim. Pads and heat on my back for 15 minutes or so (which was wonderful!), then the doc placed the accu. needles in various areas....it doesn't hurt---I promise! it really helped me, and I was surprised (and THRILLED!) that our insurance covered all of it., including my own elec. stim machine for home use! They also told me my insurance would cover one deep tissue massage per week----I hope your DH gets some relief!!!!

and again, sorry for all you're dealing with!!! I know it'd be so hard not to be able to see my Dad, too!!! ((( hugs ))))

Oops...sorry, I didn't see your DH's diagnoses before i posted about my accupuncture, etc... since my problems were due to an acute muscle issue & arthritis, everyyhing I mentioned they did for me may not apply to him...

Absolutely, yes. I drop weight like crazy (which isn't good, I'm not big to start with), exhausted all the time, hair loss

I just thought of something...you say your parents don't have any support where they live...Does your Mom drive herself to visit him, is it a long drive for her, or does she stay with him in the facilities? I wonder if there's any chance they could transfer your Dad to a place near you, then your Mom would also have a place to stay/ get emotional support, etc.

ABSOLUTELY!

1) I let smaller priorities ride. 
2) I realize that the human body is not made to handle so much stress without showing the effect, and therefore, it's to be expected that my body is reacting.
3) I need a lot more quiet solitude than when times are less stressful.
4) I eat foods and supplements that I know help balance my mood.
5) I do not deny myself foods that comfort me. Moderation in quantity and an attempt to balance those foods with more steamed vegetables is completely understandable and acceptable. This is not the time to be on a deprivation-type diet.
6) Videos on Netflix & Amazon are fantastic distractions that give me a rest from terribly anxious thoughts. I have recently found several ridiculously long scrapbooking process videos that have bored me to sleep night after night! I now have them on a private playlist marked Sleep.
7) I keep my freezer stocked with healthy but fast frozen dinners and try to keep plenty of healthier snacks on hand without any guilt whatsoever.
8) If I know someone is not a good listener to me, I do not attempt to talk to them about my problems. It only makes me frustrated and I don't have the energy for that when I'm overstressed.
9) I react to the weather and to allergens in the air. A gloomy day makes everything worse. I need more rest and to be much quieter on these days.
10) Try to remember to breathe deeply. Under a lot of anxiety, it's natural to tend to hold your breath and to breathe shallowly which in turn makes you more anxious. Exercise can help force you to breathe better, or if you play a musical instrument that you blow into, this too can help you breathe more deeply.
11) A walk outside can be great medicine.
12) A backrub or massage may be essential to relax the tension when it becomes physically painful. 
13) I remind myself that life goes in cycles and that this cycle CAN NOT LAST. As much as I hate this saying, "This too shall pass," it is nonetheless true.

Yep. What she said. 

I went to yelp to find the ones with the best reviews. First I went to a community acupuncture place, my city has a few of them, turns out everyone gets treated together in the same room and you pay what you can. Then I found out my insurance covers it so I now have one on one sessions with a woman who I just pay my medical co-pay to. I filled out a long intake form and when I see her I tell her what's going on with me that week and she treats the pressure points for that issue. I hate needles too but it's not bad. Acupuncture is traditional Chinese medicine that goes back thousands of years. My practitioner also prescribes Chinese herbs. I googled the one she gave me and it was listed as the most common drug used in Japan and approved by their govt. Anyway she checks my pulse each visit to see which points on my body need unblocking. Acupuncture can treat a variety of issues: back pain, TMJ, stress, insomnia and that's just what I have. But I've heard people have had success with infertility as well with it. To practice as an acupuncturist they have to have a masters degree and be licensed in your state. Acupuncture is a process, so it might take a few visits to feel a difference. I find my sessions very relaxing and often fall asleep. 

Well, you see, you are a strong person and probably seen as such by the other members of your family which is why you place such importance on that aspect of your personality. What you need to remember is that being 'strong' can sometimes be at your own detriment. The more you provide for your family in terms of emotional and physical support, the more you need to remember how important it is to take care of yourself as well - after all, if you aren't well, how can you be there for everyone else? There is NOTHING to say that having to take a break makes you any less than you are. It's just a reminder to you to take care of yourself as well as others.