Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 25, 2015 5:16:53 GMT
My daughter's prom dress needed to be shorten. The way the dress is made I know I couldn't do it right. And we can't go to the tailors because prom it Sat and there is just not enought time. The places here are a two week turn around and We just got the dress
She asked the seamstress of her if she would it and the seamstress said yes. Ni sent a $30 check and the seamstress would not take it.
I asked her send a bill and she won't
I really do not want to be beholden to this woman. So I want to send her a follow up message sort if like this. Your time and skill are valuable , and I don't want you to feel like we are taking advantage of you.
Somebody please rewrite that so it sounds better.
Thank you all ! We are going with a thank card, gift card and a bar of dark chocolate.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 25, 2015 5:23:19 GMT
"I really appreciate your time, talent and skills. Please allow me to repay your kindness."
Honestly though, if the seamstress has turned down payment, then maybe you should respect that. She may just want to do something nice for your dd. If you still feel obligated how about a nice card with a prom pic of your dd with a starbucks gc?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 25, 2015 5:55:29 GMT
I really need to pay this woman, so it doesn't look like my daughter took advantage of her.
Could I say. For propriety's sake i think that I should pay for your work. Or something like that?
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Post by chaosisapony on Apr 25, 2015 6:21:42 GMT
I would put the check in a nice thank you card and say "Thank you so much for your hard work on getting DDs dress ready for prom. She looked amazing and we couldn't have done it without you!"
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Post by gar on Apr 25, 2015 6:29:25 GMT
You seem more concerned about not having debt than actual gratitude? That would need different wording maybe?
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Post by 3dcrafter on Apr 25, 2015 6:29:45 GMT
If she won't accept money for herself, perhaps you could ask her if there are any charities that are near to her heart that you could donate said money to; I'm not sure how to word it at the moment...perhaps someone here can help with that  |
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 25, 2015 6:36:23 GMT
You seem more concerned about not having debt than actual gratitude? That would need different wording maybe? In the case yes !l and add a you bet your sweet bippy . I can not have it look like my daughter took advantage or that she got a special favor. |
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Post by gar on Apr 25, 2015 6:41:44 GMT
Then yes, your words about "For propriety's sake...." would be fine imo.
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Post by mdpea on Apr 25, 2015 6:58:59 GMT
I always appreciate a gift card to a fabric/haberdashery shop & note that says how much my help was really appreciated.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 25, 2015 7:09:22 GMT
Stop writing a check. I hate getting a check because I have to go to the bank to deal with it and I don't go to the bank but maybe once a year. Maybe not even that often.
Write a thank you card and put cash in it or a gift card to some place local you know she uses like a sewing store, target or even WM.
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Post by pmk on Apr 25, 2015 9:44:13 GMT
Stop writing a check. I hate getting a check because I have to go to the bank to deal with it and I don't go to the bank but maybe once a year. Maybe not even that often. Write a thank you card and put cash in it or a gift card to some place local you know she uses like a sewing store, target or even WM. I agree with the thank you card and gift card. I think she's made it clear she doesn't want payment for it but a nice card and either cash or gift card would be a really good way to show your gratitude. |
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Dani-Mani
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Post by Dani-Mani on Apr 25, 2015 10:02:27 GMT
If she doesn't want your money, she doesn't want your money. Sometimes people do things because they want to, without expecting anything in return. She's made it clear she doesn't want anything in return. I'd write a thank you note--leave the cash and gift card out--and call it a day. Don't try to force money on someone who clearly does not want it.
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Dani-Mani
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Post by Dani-Mani on Apr 25, 2015 10:03:27 GMT
You seem more concerned about not having debt than actual gratitude? That would need different wording maybe? In the case yes !l and add a you bet your sweet bippy . I can not have it look like my daughter took advantage or that she got a special favor. Why on earth would it look like this??? Just because she did it for free? Color me confused. |
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Post by miss_lizzie on Apr 25, 2015 11:04:28 GMT
If she doesn't want your money, she doesn't want your money. Sometimes people do things because they want to, without expecting anything in return. She's made it clear she doesn't want anything in return. I'd write a thank you note--leave the cash and gift card out--and call it a day. Don't try to force money on someone who clearly does not want it. I agree with this. I've found in my life that it's much easier for me to help someone else than it is to accept help from someone else, but both are important. Sometimes it's hard to receive someone else's generosity, but it's okay to. A sincere and heartfelt thank-you note is worth something too. |
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Post by christine58 on Apr 25, 2015 11:08:32 GMT
Someone did a kind thing for you and you're worried it looks like your daughter took advantage of her?? Color me confused. If she has told you that no payment is needed, quit trying to give her money. At this point you are probably making her feel really uncomfortable UNLESS there's more to this than you're saying...
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Post by ktdoesntscrap on Apr 25, 2015 11:20:05 GMT
I would send a gift card and a thank you after the fact.
Sometimes people do just want to do something kind.
Other times it maybe that she is going out of her normal professional protocol to help your daughter, and she would prefer it to be a favor then to get paid, as she doesn't want other customers to think that she can always turn things around so quickly. Or she would normally charge a lot more for this type of service and she would rather do it pro-bono then discount her services.
Is the seamstress a friend or an acquaintance with whom you think accepting this favor might come back to haunt you. If that is the case.... nothing you do now will change the reprecussions.
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Post by jmurray on Apr 25, 2015 15:15:15 GMT
She has said she doesn't want money. To press it on her now would be ungracious IMO. Send a nice thank you card and maybe arrange for a lovely bouquet of flowers to be delivered to her home. Gift cards are just money in disguise really, and I think flowers or something similar are nicer when you've been told to do nothing. I'm also confused as to why you are so insistent on paying someone who's just being generous - not everyone has ulterior motives |
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melissa
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Post by melissa on Apr 25, 2015 15:27:55 GMT
I agree with the others. Forget the check entirely. Pick up a gift card to a place like Starbucks or Joann Fabrics or a local restaurant and send a simple thank you note. Something like "We so very appreciate your help in getting dd's dress ready for prom!" As a seamstress (I am presuming from dance... your sentence about that part is missing some words  , it may have been very simple for her. For ex, I have a rolled hem foot for my machine that makes hemming certain fabrics quite simple. Or it might have been quick and easy with a serger. So, what is difficult for one may be easy for someone with the right equipment. And, it likely made her happy to help your dd. |
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GiantsFan
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Post by GiantsFan on Apr 25, 2015 15:47:00 GMT
Unless there's more back story to the relationship, you shouldn't feel beholden if someone wants to do you a favor.
Have DD send a thank you note and gift card and forget it. The seamstress will appreciate the Thank you and its her choice to use the GC or not.
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happymomma
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Post by happymomma on Apr 25, 2015 15:55:37 GMT
Sometimes people just do things out of kindness and really don't want to be paid.
If I were in your situation, I would just send her some flowers, thanking her for her kindness, and call it a day.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 25, 2015 17:00:40 GMT
Who's going to know?
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Mary Kay Lady
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Post by Mary Kay Lady on Apr 25, 2015 17:01:58 GMT
I think she just wanted to do something nice for your daughter to help her enjoy her prom. Have your daughter write a nice thank you note and include a picture of your daughter wearing the dress.
This woman has given you and your daughter a gift. The gift is her time and her talents. To insist that you pay for it somehow could be interpreted as rude and insulting.
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, it may have been very simple for her. For ex, I have a rolled hem foot for my machine that makes hemming certain fabrics quite simple. Or it might have been quick and easy with a serger. So, what is difficult for one may be easy for someone with the right equipment. And, it likely made her happy to help your dd. 
