ever do anything MORTIFYINGLY embarrassing?

I have nothing to add (I'm purposely forgetting all my horrifying moments) but just wanted to say - both stories are not only hilarious- but horrifying too!

Let's see, many years ago I walked out of the bathroom at a wedding reception with my dress tucked into the back of my pantyhose.

And last year at my "yearly appointment" while getting my pap the Dr. Had inserted the speculum along with about a gallon of K-Y and then asked me to scoot down the table a little further. Apparently there was significant enough pressure when I did it, to shoot the speculum out and have the Dr. catch it.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I was chatting with a group of friends and a female friend came over wearing a low cut blouse which clearly showed her ample bazongas. She was also wearing a stunning necklace. I said in a loud voice "Lynn I LOVE your beads" but must have been distracted and it came out as "Lynn I LOVE your breasts!"   Blush .

Glad I could provide a laugh or two but I'm also laughing at some of the others. Too funny!

One time about 10 years ago I was on a job interview at a school of a very well known educational blogger. I had gotten to know this blogger when I attended a conference that she taught a workshop at. I loved her ideas and I ended up e-mailing her some questions after the conference. After a few back and forth e-mails She found out I lived in her area and she knew I was looking for a job so she told me to apply at her district and that she would give my name to her principal because they were looking to fill a position.

The principal calls me and I go in for the interview one hot May weekday. I wore a short sleeved blouse under an overall type jumper dress. Being the proper girl that I am I wore a half slip under the skirt of the dress. But little did I know that the slip was old and the elastic waistband would, at that very moment, decide to fail. The principal was giving me a tour of the school and with each step I was feeling it glide further and further down my legs. By the time she took me to my e-mail buddy's classroom my slip was almost completely down around my ankles with the elastic part around my knees. My skirt was long so I don't know if they could see the slip around my ankles or not, but while we were talking I managed to stand behind a desk or something so I wouldn't be noticed. Eventually the principal left and I had to tell the teacher what was happening with my slip and I ended up going into an empty room next door to take it off. I was so embarrassed.

Never did get the job. I found out I was just one of those dummy interviews that they set up in order to fill the interview quota for the position.

Many, but one that really sticks in my mind was when my co-workers and I were talking about someone we hadn't seen in a long time and I said I hadn't seen her in a coon's age. My black friend reared up and said WHAT? I had NO IDEA that "coon" was a racial slur. I was not raised to use that saying in a racist way. To me, it just meant you haven't seen someone in a long time. I was mortified when it was explained to me. Fortunately we are very good friends (and that was 14 years ago and we are still close!) And she knew I didn't mean to use any type of slur.
Still, it was so embarrassing that I said that in front of three black women. Definitely learned something new that day. I've never said it since.

I was student teaching 5th grade and was walking around monitoring the students working and a fart slipped out next to a student's head. He was shocked, then laughed, I laughed, we all laughed and we all got over it, but OMG was I embarrassed.

haha!  Many years ago, a very good friend came to visit from out of town.  She stayed at another good friend's.  A friend of her husband was my high school boyfriend.

He came by with his girlfriend and introduced her to everyone as "Nancy".  Immediately turned red, and stuttered "err.... ummm... and then said real name.

And yes, I (Nancy) was there as well.  The girlfriend wasn't impressed.  We were all so embarrassed for him

I am from a very, very small town in northeast GA where everyone knew me. Back in high school, at the height of the Smokey and the Bandit era, CBs were our cell phones. One afternoon, my mom sent my sister and me to the grocery store. While Donna went in, I stayed in the car and took advantage of the time to try to contact my boyfriend. I said "Breaker 19 this is Bambi, Cane Cutter, you got your ears on" a couple of times. All of a sudden, my sister races out of the store with her arms outstretched like she was a bird ready to fly. She was yelling "Shut up, shut up"!! My CB radio signal had been picked up by the grocery store's intercom system and my conversation was broadcasted over the loudspeaker for every one to hear!!! I wanted the earth to open up and engulf me! Needless to say, I did not show my face in that store for a very long time.

When I was in high school, I was part of an elite choral group. We frequently toured in order to perform in community events. My junior year, we went from Portland to Disneyland, where we sang at some something or other. On the tour bus, on the way back, I was feeling pretty car sick (i'm highly motion sick). I had a large garbage bag in my lap and was mentally willing myself not to throw up in front of the entire choir.

My director came over to check on me, obviously trying to comfort me and make sure I was OK. He kept talking to me and I was afraid to open my mouth for fear of the worst thing happening. He kept pressing me to see if I was OK since I wasn't verbally responding. Sure enough, I opened my mouth to say I was hanging in there and I threw up all over him. Seriously chest to shoes...in front of the whole choir.

My senior year I was excused from touring.

Now, 25+years later, I'm part of a community choir and he, now retired from teaching, is the director. I still haven't been able to live that one down!

Yes I have done something similar to the OP.

Years ago when DD was about 4yo a work colleague, Sandra, invited me to her NYE party. I would only have known one other person from work who was going, so I thought I would only drop in for a couple of hours with DD. I had never been to Sandra's house before. It was up in the hills and the street numbering was all over the place. We pulled up to her house and walked in. I asked one of the guests "Is Sandra around?" The woman replied "Yes she's just out the back." So I went outside but couldn't see Sandra anywhere so I just started mingling with the other guests, eating the finger food, having a grand ole time. 

Well I was there for about half an hour before I realised that I WAS AT THE WRONG HOUSE! It was just a coincidence that there also happened to be another Sandra at this stranger's house.

I was SO embarrassed, but all the guests thought it was hilarious! I casually waved goodbye, told them thanks for having me then practically ran up the long driveway to my car with DD in tow.  

One of my most embarrassing moments happened after my youngest son was born. I had a friend who said she would keep my children for me if I would run an errand for her and return some items to a friend's house. I was all for that -- I could get some things done. Anyway, I was in a hurry and stumbled over the doorstep of the friend's house. I hit the door to catch myself and the door flew open. I landed face first in her doorway and a whole bunch of people jumped out and said "Surprise"... and then "are you hurt"... "are you hurt". I looked up and it was a surprise baby shower for me.   That was quite a grand entrance, but I can be clumsy like that.

Vi

I thought of another one!

When I was in the 6th grade I was ridiculously and painfully clumsy and awkward. I was also insanely boy crazy and had a hard time paying attention to anything else when there were boys around.

Our school district was so small that we only had one functioning gym that grades K-12 had to share. Normally, the 6th-8th grade kids were allowed to spend recess in the gym when it got too cold to go outside in the winter.  Unfortunately, sometimes the high school kids needed the gym to get ready for things such as dances, awards ceremonies, graduation, etc. When that happened, all of the junior high kids were banished to the bleachers and told that we were to avoid walking on the gym floor at all costs. We were allowed to walk around and talk to our friends while we were in the bleachers or we could use the time as an extra study hall (no one did this).

Anyway, during my 6th grade year the high school FHA girls hosted a formal dance in the gym. They decorated and decorated and decorated like you would not believe (I suspect it was mostly because as long as they were still busy putting up decorations, they didn't have to go back to their regular classes). They strung wire across the gym from one side to another and then twisted a row of streamers from the wire all the way down to the floor. They spent hours getting all the streamers just right, and it was truly an impressive sight when they were finished. 

Of course, while all of this was going on, I was stuck in the bleachers with all the other junior high kids. We tried to make the best of it, though, and that particular day my friends and I were engaged in a furious note war with some of the boys in our class. I had a huuuge crush on one of the boys, so I was distracted and hyper from the get go. Participating in the note war required a member of one group to deliver a note to the other group, then run away as fast as possible. The note would then be sent back to the original group with additional comments scribbled all over it. Why this was considered a fun activity, I really don't know, but it was. I guess it was a really pathetic form of flirting.

When it was my turn to deliver the note to the group of boys, I was both unbelievably nervous and horribly self-conscious. I was so focused on getting the note to the boys that I tuned out everything around me and instead concentrated on trying to look "cool" as I made my way across the bleachers. Right when I got to the center section of the bleachers something terrible happened. I walked full-force straight into the wire that was holding up the wall of streamers. The entire wire perimeter of the decorated area jerked violently up and down and side to side while I struggled desperately to regain my balance in front of the entire student body of the junior high school plus the 20 or so high school kids who were working on the decorations. Everyone noticed what I'd done (it was kind of hard not to) and there was no way I could slink away unnoticed. I remember wanting to sink into the floor and disappear. I was so embarrassed that I wanted to cry, but if I remember correctly, I didn't. I can laugh about the whole incident now that I'm older and have accepted the fact that I'll never be "cool" in any way, shape or form, but when I was 12, it didn't seem quite so humorous.

In my defense, I had food poisoning! But still I went to the job interview. It was there in front of the panel interview of 6 that a fart slipped out. Considering I was in the don't trust a fart stage of the belly wars I think I got off easy. I was hooooooorrified and so embarrassed. I did tell them I'd been sick but alas I did not get the job. They did refer me to a different position though.