Nanner
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,987 
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Post by Nanner on Jun 3, 2015 13:30:44 GMT
without ruining a potential friendship.
You are on a block that is mostly young families, with children around your children's age. Everyone gets along well, and everyone in the block gets together for block parties and such. You and the several of the other ladies on the block go out for a glass of wine together, every once in a while.
And then one of the ladies starts a home sales business and is really aggressive. You don't want the product. You don't like it and it's really expensive. But she won't let be. You like her, you have enjoyed her company in the past, and there's definitely a potential for a friendship. But you don't.want.her.product.
How do you say "NO" without putting a wedge in between you and this lady or without making thing uncomfortable at neighbourhood events.
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grinningcat
Pearl Clutcher
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Jun 26, 2014 13:06:35 GMT
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Post by grinningcat on Jun 3, 2015 13:33:04 GMT
"Thank you so much for thinking of me. Unfortunately at this time, I'm not interested in buying (product). When I am, I will let you know. But it was very kind of you to let me know that you have it."
If she gets her nose out of joint for saying no, then she's not really a friend.
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keithurbanlovinpea
Pearl Clutcher
Flowing with the go...
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Post by keithurbanlovinpea on Jun 3, 2015 13:35:41 GMT
I think you have to say just that. "I enjoy our friendship and I respect that you are trying to start a business, however I am not interested in the product, so I would appreciate it if you direct your sales to other people who are interested."
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Dalai Mama
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La Pea Boheme
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Jun 26, 2014 0:31:31 GMT
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Post by Dalai Mama on Jun 3, 2015 13:35:49 GMT
I would argue that she's the one putting the wedge between you. Just say that you're sorry but you aren't interested and leave it at that.
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Post by anxiousmom on Jun 3, 2015 13:35:47 GMT
"oh gosh, thank you so much for think about me! But I am not interested at this time." or "You are so sweet to ask, but I am going to have to say no thank you for now."
I am not as blunt as others, but a variation of these two statements are my go to over the years and it does seem to work. I may have to say it more than once, but I find that if I just smile and say the same thing over and over again without engaging in the why of the no, they eventually stop asking.
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iluvpink
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Posts: 4,370
Location: Michigan
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Post by iluvpink on Jun 3, 2015 13:42:08 GMT
Ugh I hate that. I have unfollowed/unfriended on FB because people start selling something and then it seems like almost every status update is about their product. I recently went to a support group meeting/event that I belong to and one of the women brought her stuff and was pitching it. Annoying.
I think just be blunt and say you enjoy her friendship but her product is something you just don't have any interest in at all.
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Post by gar on Jun 3, 2015 13:45:02 GMT
I agree that it would be her putting the wedge between you, not you. Said with a smile "Thank you, but I'm really not interest" should be sufficient though you may have to repeat it a few times!  |
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Post by librarylady on Jun 3, 2015 13:51:58 GMT
Also, remember that you don't have to give a reason--just play like a broken record and repeat the phrase you have selected to say no.
She is the one creating the problem. I'd bet that the other neighbors will admire your spine and wish they had a spine to say no.
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gloryjoy
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,332
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Post by gloryjoy on Jun 3, 2015 14:02:19 GMT
Yes I am sure you are not the only lady who feels this way. And I agree, she is creating the wedge, not you.
Lots of great ways to say no in the posts here.
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akathy
What's For Dinner?
Still peaing from Podunk!
Posts: 4,546
Location: North Dakota
Jun 25, 2014 22:56:55 GMT
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Post by akathy on Jun 3, 2015 14:02:56 GMT
I'm sorry but for many reasons I am not able to buy your product and it makes me uncomfortable when you ask me to so many times.
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Post by Bitchy Rich on Jun 3, 2015 14:11:59 GMT
I would definitely avoid using any phrases like "at this time" or "for now" that might make her think you would be interested down the road. Either be honest and just say you aren't interested, or say you tried some through a friend once and didn't like it.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Jun 3, 2015 15:10:07 GMT
I would definitely avoid using any phrases like "at this time" or "for now" that might make her think you would be interested down the road. Either be honest and just say you aren't interested, or say you tried some through a friend once and didn't like it. I agree with this-- if you say 'not now' you might be leaving yourself open to having her still pushing the product on you, hoping that sometime will finally be 'now.' If you're not interested at all, you need to say that directly. |
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SweetieBsMom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,741
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Post by SweetieBsMom on Jun 3, 2015 15:14:47 GMT
I hate these situations. I've found a firm "Thank you for thinking of me, but I am not interested". Rinse, later, repeat.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 21:21:08 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 3, 2015 15:17:22 GMT
'No thanks' end of.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 21:21:08 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 3, 2015 15:39:27 GMT
I just say "No thank you." No explanation necessary. If she keeps it up, say "I had already told you I wasn't interested." I have been in this position on several occasions before and I feel your pain. Ugh.
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MaryMary
Pearl Clutcher
Lazy
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Post by MaryMary on Jun 3, 2015 15:47:51 GMT
I made a policy years ago that I would no longer go to home sales parties, so if I'm invited now (which almost never happens because my friends know by now that I won't attend) I nicely but firmly explain my policy. That way it doesn't feel as personal to whoever is selling or inviting... "I'm sorry, I decided a long time ago not to go to home sales events anymore. But, thanks for thinking of me.".
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
I'd love a cup of tea. #1966
Posts: 7,402
Location: Third Rock from the sun.
Jun 28, 2014 14:08:19 GMT
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Post by anniebygaslight on Jun 3, 2015 15:48:36 GMT
No thank you should do it. No need for explanations,
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Jun 3, 2015 17:43:34 GMT
Being direct doesn't mean being ugly about it. I often reply with, "I never mix business and pleasure. I'd rather we just stay friends."
I agree with those who say avoid using any phrase like "right now" or "at this time." Don't leave any door open that you might be interested at some other time.
And whatever you do, do NOT think I'll order just this once or attend just one party so she'll leave me alone. If you do that, she'll never give up.
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Nanner
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,987
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Post by Nanner on Jun 3, 2015 23:55:55 GMT
Thanks, ladies. I was actually asking for someone who was venting to me about this happening. I'll pass on the info. This woman keeps trying to get her to, not only buy the stuff, but to have a party as well.
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StephDRebel
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,692
Location: Ohio
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Post by StephDRebel on Jun 4, 2015 0:43:55 GMT
Have her email me? I'll explain to her exactly how she's killing her business and her relationships by harassing her social circle.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jun 4, 2015 0:46:06 GMT
"Thank you so much for thinking of me. Unfortunately at this time, I'm not interested in buying (product). When I am, I will let you know. But it was very kind of you to let me know that you have it." If she gets her nose out of joint for saying no, then she's not really a friend. Could not have been said better! Perfect response. |
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Post by papersilly on Jun 4, 2015 3:06:19 GMT
Our close neighbor friend started doing MLM of "financial" products and was hitting everyone up. Super nice as he was, he was the least credible person for the sales pitch because he and his wife were awful with their finances. Great friends though.
Soon the neighbors were annoyed at being put in an awkward position. When he finally got around to us, we told him we weren't into those kinds of financial services. Clean and to the point. no weird excuses. Just honest. We are still good friends today.
Like your mother says, genuine friendships will weather occasional bumps in the road.
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Post by ktdoesntscrap on Jun 4, 2015 3:11:32 GMT
Remember no is a complete sentence.
But politeness is important to a point.
So No Thank you to start.
If she persists.. then, OH I thought I already said No Thank You.
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Post by AussieMeg on Jun 4, 2015 3:48:42 GMT
And then one of the ladies starts a home sales business and is really aggressive. You don't want the product. You don't like it and it's really expensive. But she won't let be. You like her, you have enjoyed her company in the past, and there's definitely a potential for a friendship. But you don't.want.her.product. To be honest, someone who is that aggressive and won't let it be is exhibiting traits that do not appeal to me in a potential friend. Regardless of whatever happens with this situation, you might find, as you get to know her better, that she's not very good friend material anyway. |
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Post by jumperhop on Jun 4, 2015 3:59:57 GMT
My heart is telling me yes but my mind is telling me no!
I also tell them in advance that it's not my thing. Or I will go and socialize and be supportive but not buy anything.
Jen
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Post by anniefb on Jun 4, 2015 8:34:46 GMT
No thank you should do it. No need for explanations,  |
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Nicole in TX
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,951
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Post by Nicole in TX on Jun 4, 2015 10:30:55 GMT
A true friend would not put you in that position to begin with.  |
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Time to get off the internet!