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Post by buddysmom on Jun 20, 2015 14:25:35 GMT
We will be attending an out of town wedding for close relatives. We are not part of the wedding party.
I'm wearing a LBD with a simple necklace to the wedding which is at 6 pm.
Is the rehearsal dinner a little less dressy or is a black/darkish dress ok for that?
Thanks!
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grinningcat
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,663
Jun 26, 2014 13:06:35 GMT
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Post by grinningcat on Jun 20, 2015 14:30:06 GMT
It totally depends on the rehearsal. My friend's was more formal, everyone in business casual. Ours will be a backyard pig roast, so dresses and dressy pants and shirts would be totally out of place (though we know some of the traditionalists will turn their noses up at the lack of formality and show up overdressed but that's not our problem). I assume there was an invite, does it indicate what kind of meal it is?
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Post by myshelly on Jun 20, 2015 14:44:59 GMT
No one can answer this.
It's like saying "how dressy should a wedding be"?
Well, is it a black tie event in a ballroom at 7pm or is it a backyard BBQ at noon?
Totally depends on the individual event.
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Post by anxiousmom on Jun 20, 2015 14:46:49 GMT
It totally depends on the rehearsal. My friend's was more formal, everyone in business casual. Ours will be a backyard pig roast, so dresses and dressy pants and shirts would be totally out of place (though we know some of the traditionalists will turn their noses up at the lack of formality and show up overdressed but that's not our problem). I assume there was an invite, does it indicate what kind of meal it is? I am about as traditional as they come, and I had bbq- as in chicken with bbq sauce (complete with beans, corn bread and cole slaw) at my reception.  |
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grinningcat
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,663
Jun 26, 2014 13:06:35 GMT
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Post by grinningcat on Jun 20, 2015 14:48:53 GMT
It totally depends on the rehearsal. My friend's was more formal, everyone in business casual. Ours will be a backyard pig roast, so dresses and dressy pants and shirts would be totally out of place (though we know some of the traditionalists will turn their noses up at the lack of formality and show up overdressed but that's not our problem). I assume there was an invite, does it indicate what kind of meal it is? I am about as traditional as they come, and I had bbq- as in chicken with bbq sauce (complete with beans, corn bread and cole slaw) at my reception. That sounds awesome! The traditionalists in my world would call that too casual and inappropriate. That we're having a seated, plated dinner instead of their traditional chuch-lady catered family style meal with 5 meats and a gazillion sides is also inappropriate (how will anyone get enough to eat... oh the horrors). I guess I was projecting, but I was basically trying to say that rehearsal dinners can be formal or can be casual so it's best to see how the invitation phrases it. |
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Post by Meri-Lyn on Jun 20, 2015 14:55:46 GMT
I agree, it's going to depend on the location for the most part. My cousin had a pretty formal (well, semi-formal) wedding, but the rehearsal dinner was at a local beach hangout, so it was pretty low-key. Sundresses were the norm, some of the guys even wore shorts.
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Post by lumo on Jun 20, 2015 15:16:24 GMT
Our rehearsal dinner wasn't fancy at all...it was at a brewery, so jeans and sweaters (it was late October) were perfectly fine.
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Post by Tamhugh on Jun 20, 2015 15:24:44 GMT
Our rehearsal dinner was dressy because my in-laws hosted it and chose a restaurant that was fancier. My brother and sister's rehearsals were very casual and low key. Sister's was at her in-laws' house (normal for the area where we grew up) and my brother's was at his in-law's church hall.
I have never been to a rehearsal dinner unless I was in the wedding, or my husband or sons were in the wedding. Where I grew up and where we live now, it is only the immediate families and the bridal parties. I am always fascinated at what customs are in other areas (especially since I have two sons and hope to host a rehearsal dinner or two some day).
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PLurker
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,890
Location: Behind the Cheddar Curtain
Jun 28, 2014 3:48:49 GMT
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Post by PLurker on Jun 20, 2015 15:41:15 GMT
Yes, they are all different. If not specified on invite or by restaurant of choice, I'd go with a simple dress that could go either way.
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Post by CarolT on Jun 20, 2015 15:41:46 GMT
I would ask your family members involved in the wedding planning. My rehearsal dinner was a backyard bbq, so super casual. One rehearsal dinner I attended was at a country club, and cocktail attire was appropriate. The one I attended most recently was in the spring in the courtyard of a local restaurant - most women wore casual/sundress and men wore open - collared shirts.
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Post by freecharlie on Jun 20, 2015 16:39:41 GMT
Ours wasn't fancy at all. I think most of us had jeans or something similar on.
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valleyview
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,816
Jun 27, 2014 18:41:26 GMT
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Post by valleyview on Jun 20, 2015 16:50:22 GMT
I agree with CarolT. You need to ask specifically. Most rehearsal dinners that I have attended recentl have been dressy casual, but depending on location and family, it could be very casual or very (cocktail) dressy. I've been to rehearsal dinners that were dressier than the wedding! |
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Post by metaldancer on Jun 20, 2015 17:13:31 GMT
I've only been to two. One was at a country club and most folks had on "church clothes" or business casual type clothes. The other was a backyard BBQ. Everyone was in jeans/shorts/bathing suits.
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,975
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Jun 20, 2015 17:28:07 GMT
I've usually worn "church clothes." What you're wearing sounds fine to me.
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oldcrow
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,828 
Location: Ontario,Canada
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Post by oldcrow on Jun 20, 2015 19:58:56 GMT
Our rehearsal dinner was dressy because my in-laws hosted it and chose a restaurant that was fancier. My brother and sister's rehearsals were very casual and low key. Sister's was at her in-laws' house (normal for the area where we grew up) and my brother's was at his in-law's church hall. I have never been to a rehearsal dinner unless I was in the wedding, or my husband or sons were in the wedding. Where I grew up and where we live now, it is only the immediate families and the bridal parties. I am always fascinated at what customs are in other areas (especially since I have two sons and hope to host a rehearsal dinner or two some day). It is the same in my area. Just the immediate families (kids excluded) and the wedding party. Now the wedding party members do bring a partner if they wish. Oh, and the church people who will be involved. So there are no invitations or anything because if you are in the wedding party you know you are to attend. Why would you invite anyone else? I really am not understanding the purpose of this extra and I certainly do not intend this to be snarky. |
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Jun 20, 2015 20:05:31 GMT
Out-of-town guests are typically included in the rehearsal dinner whether they have a role in the wedding or not.
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Post by anxiousmom on Jun 20, 2015 20:06:01 GMT
Our rehearsal dinner was dressy because my in-laws hosted it and chose a restaurant that was fancier. My brother and sister's rehearsals were very casual and low key. Sister's was at her in-laws' house (normal for the area where we grew up) and my brother's was at his in-law's church hall. I have never been to a rehearsal dinner unless I was in the wedding, or my husband or sons were in the wedding. Where I grew up and where we live now, it is only the immediate families and the bridal parties. I am always fascinated at what customs are in other areas (especially since I have two sons and hope to host a rehearsal dinner or two some day). It is the same in my area. Just the immediate families (kids excluded) and the wedding party. Now the wedding party members do bring a partner if they wish. Oh, and the church people who will be involved. So their are no invitations or anything because if you are in the wedding party you know you are to attend. Why would you invite anyone else? I really am not understanding the purpose of this extra and I certainly do not intend this to be snarky. A good portion of the rehearsal dinners that I have been to have been split into two different portions, the bride, groom and immediate wedding party go to the church for the rehearsal and then meet at the dinner location where the rest of the folks are waiting. They generally include the wedding party, their spouses/dates, and close family members and friends who traveled to the location for the wedding. They aren't limited to just the immediate group, but can include any out of town guests that you don't want to be on their own for dinner. I have been to rehearsal dinners where there were upwards of 75 people.  |
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Post by doesitmatter on Jun 20, 2015 20:24:51 GMT
No one can answer this. It's like saying "how dressy should a wedding be"? Well, is it a black tie event in a ballroom at 7pm or is it a backyard BBQ at noon? Totally depends on the individual event.  |
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Post by alittleintrepid on Jun 20, 2015 20:28:22 GMT
So, where is it being held?
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Post by doesitmatter on Jun 20, 2015 20:28:23 GMT
We will be attending an out of town wedding for close relatives. We are not part of the wedding party. I'm wearing a LBD with a simple necklace to the wedding which is at 6 pm. Is the rehearsal dinner a little less dressy or is a black/darkish dress ok for that? Thanks! Apparently I shouldn't have skipped coffee this morning. I was going to ask what a LBD is  And then as I hit reply I remembered.... and can't believe I am admitting this and posting it |
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oldcrow
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,828
Location: Ontario,Canada
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Post by oldcrow on Jun 20, 2015 20:52:48 GMT
It is the same in my area. Just the immediate families (kids excluded) and the wedding party. Now the wedding party members do bring a partner if they wish. Oh, and the church people who will be involved. So their are no invitations or anything because if you are in the wedding party you know you are to attend. Why would you invite anyone else? I really am not understanding the purpose of this extra and I certainly do not intend this to be snarky. A good portion of the rehearsal dinners that I have been to have been split into two different portions, the bride, groom and immediate wedding party go to the church for the rehearsal and then meet at the dinner location where the rest of the folks are waiting. They generally include the wedding party, their spouses/dates, and close family members and friends who traveled to the location for the wedding. They aren't limited to just the immediate group, but can include any out of town guests that you don't want to be on their own for dinner. I have been to rehearsal dinners where there were upwards of 75 people. Wow |
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Post by ktdoesntscrap on Jun 20, 2015 22:03:54 GMT
Our rehearsal dinner was dressy because my in-laws hosted it and chose a restaurant that was fancier. My brother and sister's rehearsals were very casual and low key. Sister's was at her in-laws' house (normal for the area where we grew up) and my brother's was at his in-law's church hall. I have never been to a rehearsal dinner unless I was in the wedding, or my husband or sons were in the wedding. Where I grew up and where we live now, it is only the immediate families and the bridal parties. I am always fascinated at what customs are in other areas (especially since I have two sons and hope to host a rehearsal dinner or two some day). It is the same in my area. Just the immediate families (kids excluded) and the wedding party. Now the wedding party members do bring a partner if they wish. Oh, and the church people who will be involved. So there are no invitations or anything because if you are in the wedding party you know you are to attend. Why would you invite anyone else? I really am not understanding the purpose of this extra and I certainly do not intend this to be snarky. In my family/circle it is customary to invite out of town guests to the rehearsal. They are in town for the wedding, so it seems natural to invite them. |
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jun 21, 2015 1:01:00 GMT
Out-of-town guests are typically included in the rehearsal dinner whether they have a role in the wedding or not. That's what I was going to say too. We didn't have anyone from out of town attending, so for us it was the bridal party, the pastor, our parents and our friends that were playing the music for the wedding. DH's sister had many people from out of the area that attended her wedding so there were probably 50 people at their rehearsal dinner. |
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Deleted
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Aug 18, 2025 21:22:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 21, 2015 1:04:19 GMT
My cousin had everyone really dressed up for a big ethnic rehearsal dinner. (She is the wife). Everyone came in ethnic clothes if they owned them or in fancy dresses. I bought a couple of dresses to go to it. I would say her's was pretty fancy.
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Deleted
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Aug 18, 2025 21:22:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 21, 2015 2:04:20 GMT
As others have said, I would find out where it is being held first.
Mine was at a restaurant, while my sister is having hers at her fiancé's farm.
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Nicole in TX
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,951
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Post by Nicole in TX on Jun 21, 2015 2:05:42 GMT
Out-of-town guests are typically included in the rehearsal dinner whether they have a role in the wedding or not. I have never seen this done. |
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Aug 18, 2025 21:22:02 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 21, 2015 2:15:56 GMT
My rehearsal dinner was at a local burger joint where they called your receipt number, you picked the food up in a plastic basket at the pick up window, sat down to eat and cleared your own table yourself afterward. A little black dress would have been WAY over dressed.
Jeans, favorite shirts, and clean boots (scrape the manure off before coming in clean)
So ask someone what the expectations are. It could be a black tie affair. It could be a "burger with the cowboys" and you only need to scrape any manure off your footwear before showing up.
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Post by myshelly on Jun 21, 2015 2:21:59 GMT
Out-of-town guests are typically included in the rehearsal dinner whether they have a role in the wedding or not. I have never seen this done. I'm in Texas and I have always heard/seen that out of town guests are invited to the rehersal dinner. It's considered part of being a good host/hostess to entertain the out of town guests. |
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Nicole in TX
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,951
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Post by Nicole in TX on Jun 21, 2015 2:25:00 GMT
I have never seen this done. I'm in Texas and I have always heard/seen that out of town guests are invited to the rehersal dinner. It's considered part of being a good host/hostess to entertain the out of town guests. I am not in Texas.  |
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Post by myshelly on Jun 21, 2015 2:25:21 GMT
I'm in Texas and I have always heard/seen that out of town guests are invited to the rehersal dinner. It's considered part of being a good host/hostess to entertain the out of town guests. I am not in Texas. Hahaha, fooled by your username |
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