anniebeth24
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,716 
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Post by anniebeth24 on Aug 13, 2015 15:22:49 GMT
I'm on the board of our school's foundation. We often get memorial contributions and have always used them to create scholarships for graduating seniors.
Our community just lost an 18 year-old newly-graduated boy and his family has asked that contributions go to our foundation. Everyone that knew him says that a scholarship just isn't the "right" way to honor him. He was a quiet kid with a small group of friends, into gaming, not involved in any extracurriculars within school.
Looking for ideas of ways that our organization could use the funds (probably about $1,000) to memorialize this student. Teachers and principals have stated that memorial gardens and trees create a lot of stress because they need to be maintained and there's a lot of guilt when they are not. Similar issues were raised about a bench or a sculpture - what if it gets vandalized or broken? Who's responsible for maintenance or replacement once the funds are depleted? Our school district doesn't have any extra budget for this and our foundation is a small group of volunteers that changes over every few years. We don't want to create a situation that might cause more pain for a family when they see that their memorial is not well-maintained.
We will definitely be asking his family for suggestions, but will not be meeting with them for a few months. We'd like to be prepared just in case they want our suggestions and input.
Any suggestions, RefuPeas?
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quiltz
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,840
Location: CANADA
Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
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Post by quiltz on Aug 13, 2015 15:40:43 GMT
Please honour the wishes of the family and use this money ($1,000.00) for your foundation and incorporate it into your scholarship fund.
Sometimes the family doesn't want to have a "memorial specific to their child" for many different reasons. Their reasons are truly personal. As a parent who has had a hs sr pass, it was our desire to not have a scholarship specifically named for our child. As my child was part of the school community, why not combine the funds into the school community scholarship fund?
Please respect the wishes of the family. Please do not ask why. Some things are private and should remain as such.
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anniebeth24
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,716
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Post by anniebeth24 on Aug 13, 2015 15:53:38 GMT
Please honour the wishes of the family and use this money ($1,000.00) for your foundation and incorporate it into your scholarship fund.
Sometimes the family doesn't want to have a "memorial specific to their child" for many different reasons. Their reasons are truly personal. As a parent who has had a hs sr pass, it was our desire to not have a scholarship specifically named for our child. As my child was part of the school community, why not combine the funds into the school community scholarship fund?
Please respect the wishes of the family. Please do not ask why. Some things are private and should remain as such.
So sorry to hear about your loss. I certainly did not intend to be hurtful in this post and hope that we are never disrespectful to his family. We have not heard anything directly from the family about their wishes at this point. They have asked that the money be directed to us and have told us that they will discuss its specific use at a later date. Many board members are just speculating at this point that a scholarship will NOT be their choice, but it may very well be that they choose to do that. |
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Post by gorgeouskid on Aug 13, 2015 15:56:07 GMT
A fund for school supplies for needy students?
A donation of books to the library?
A field trip fund?
An instrument for the school band?
A piece of artwork for the office?
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Post by christine58 on Aug 13, 2015 15:56:58 GMT
Please honour the wishes of the family and use this money ($1,000.00) for your foundation and incorporate it into your scholarship fund.
Sometimes the family doesn't want to have a "memorial specific to their child" for many different reasons. Their reasons are truly personal. As a parent who has had a hs sr pass, it was our desire to not have a scholarship specifically named for our child. As my child was part of the school community, why not combine the funds into the school community scholarship fund?
Please respect the wishes of the family. Please do not ask why. Some things are private and should remain as such.
So sorry to hear about your loss. I certainly did not intend to be hurtful in this post and hope that we are never disrespectful to his family.
We have not heard anything directly from the family about their wishes at this point. They have asked that the money be directed to us and have told us that they will discuss its specific use at a later date.Many board members are just speculating at this point that a scholarship will NOT be their choice, but it may very well be that they choose to do that. Then do as they have asked. Wait to talk to them about it---don't do something based on what others have said that a "scholarship is not the right way to honor". This decision and discussion is with the parents....so do nothing until then |
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anniebeth24
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,716
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Post by anniebeth24 on Aug 13, 2015 16:10:31 GMT
So sorry to hear about your loss. I certainly did not intend to be hurtful in this post and hope that we are never disrespectful to his family.
We have not heard anything directly from the family about their wishes at this point. They have asked that the money be directed to us and have told us that they will discuss its specific use at a later date.Many board members are just speculating at this point that a scholarship will NOT be their choice, but it may very well be that they choose to do that. Then do as they have asked. Wait to talk to them about it---don't do something based on what others have said that a "scholarship is not the right way to honor". This decision and discussion is with the parents....so do nothing until then I understand what you're saying and we're definitely not going to DO anything before this meeting. We were just brainstorming ideas just in case they ask us for a suggestion outside of a scholarship. We don't have a general scholarship fund that these funds could go into, all of our scholarships are specifically named in honor of their donors, whether it's a business, an organization, or a memorial. We do, however, fund all kinds of programs within the school, so we are not just a scholarship organization. |
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Post by PEArfect on Aug 13, 2015 16:13:20 GMT
I think it's wonderful that you are seeking out ideas, beyond what your board has thought of, to present to the family.
What about donating to a school computer lab? A lot of classes use educational games at the elementary level.
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NoWomanNoCry
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,856
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Post by NoWomanNoCry on Aug 13, 2015 16:34:33 GMT
I think it's wonderful that you are seeking out ideas, beyond what your board has thought of, to present to the family. What about donating to a school computer lab? A lot of classes use educational games at the elementary level. I was going to suggest this as well since this young man was into gaming. |
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quiltz
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,840
Location: CANADA
Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
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Post by quiltz on Aug 13, 2015 16:36:40 GMT
I think it's wonderful that you are seeking out ideas, beyond what your board has thought of, to present to the family. What about donating to a school computer lab? A lot of classes use educational games at the elementary level. I was going to suggest this as well since this young man was into gaming. That is a wonderful idea. This incorporates what the young man enjoyed and also passes on this enjoyment to the future students at the school.
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Post by librarylady on Aug 13, 2015 16:40:14 GMT
Wait on the family to mention their decision.
I will say that library books sounds good, but when I was in a school a man came in. He wanted to find the book that had been donated in ?'s honor (his? his father? I don't remember). Anyway the book had been removed as part of the regular process (age or damage). He was devastated to learn the book was not in the library. I felt bad for him, but................It had been 20 years since the donation was made to the library.
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Post by cindyupnorth on Aug 13, 2015 17:37:06 GMT
What was the boy planning on doing after graduation? was he going on to college? A scholrship for a kid going to to computer sciences, or IT would be a good idea.
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