attended sports meeting at the HS my kids will attend

That hasn't been our experience, although they cover the same topics, and both parents and athletes sign "agreements" about policies.
Your description makes me think there was a problem- or lawsuit- in previous years!

I have to wonder what the background is...I would try to ask around to see if there were specific problems in the last few years. It sounds like they are reacting to something.

It sounds like they have had problems and want to let parents know the consequences. Perhaps that should have come at the end of an upbeat meeting though.

Sounds like something went down last year and they are letting everyone know it will not be tolerated this year. 

Not our normal. Of course I mostly avoid parent meetings.

Sounds like ours. We skip that meeting and just go straight to the tennis meeting afterwards. Last year DH insisted we go to the ore-meeting. It was his first time going, this year he decided we could skip it.

Sounds pretty normal to me, and my kids went to a very small school. No school police officer - but since it is a small school - there are no secrets....LOL

Our school has a zero tolerance policy. If you are caught/photographed at a party, even if you are not drinking, but alcohol or other controlled substances are present - you are benched for 6 weeks. You attend practices and go to the games, but sit on the bench in your street clothes. If the six weeks extends beyond the season, it picks up in the next sport you go out for, or rolls over to the next year if you don't participate in any other sport. It is enforced for everyone and has made a major impact on the drinking. It also has a lot of kids going out for sports they never would have, to get that suspension filled.

Every coach talks about when you can contact them. I agree with it. You should cool off a bit before confronting them about something. Never during or right after a game. It's never a good idea...

The bolded part is exactly what our school district does. It's a Code of Conduct meeting, and anyone involved in sports or any type of extra curricular activity is required to attend it once during high school. The kids and parents have to sign an acknowledgment that they understand the rules and consequences. The sports meeting I'm pretty sure breaks off after the initial meeting where the kids meet the coaches and then they explain the expectations, etc. And, we have a county sheriff at the school full-time.

The school explained they have a zero tolerance for drinking/drugs, and the students are expected to be good role models. I never looked at it like we live in a bad area, the school is bad, etc. It's high school, kids will do dumb things, and the school has strict consequences for those that break the rules. We also got the "if you're at a party and there's drinking/drugs...walk away" and different levels of consequences.

IMO it was no big deal. It's high school. There are kids that will do drugs. There are kids that will drink. And there will be consequences if caught.

He cannot dictate when and what you talk to your daughter about..that's absurd. I bet it has more to do with the stupid ass parents who yell and scream a their kids while they are playing.  Many schools have codes of conducts PARENTS have to sign and a lot of it has to do with their own sportsmanship/behavior during games.  

Well, I say BRAVO to anyone stressing the consequences of teen alcohol and drug use. Admittedly, it has been 30 years since I was in high school, but it was well-known that the 'jocks' were some of the biggest drinkers in school. Things may have changed now, but here they were the most popular kids in school, usually with the more well-to-do parents who had big houses and went away on weekends leaving the kids to party it up. Damages and mischief were bought off and swept under the carpet and coaches and school officials looked the other way because they needed their star player playing the game.

We talk about 'finding their currency' when dealing with teen problems all the time. Thankfully this IS something that can have some leverage over teens in sports, and it is good that it is made very clear that illegal (yes, it is illegal for teens to drink and drug) behaviors won't be tolerated. At least they have a captive audience with these kids who really want to be involved in sports. Too bad they couldn't find 'currency' to reach all kids. But...some are better than none.

I wouldn't say that it means that there has been a specific problem in this school. Teen alcohol use IS a huge problem. At least they can control behaviors (or dole out consequences) of this one segment of the school population. It won't work on all of them, but probably will on the majority, as long as it is enforced as wholeheartedly as it is promoted.

I have a nephew who was an incredible athlete. He was varsity baseball and football as a freshman. Sadly he got into partying, drinking and drugs, and threw away what was a very promising future in sports. Had his school programs been this proactive and strict perhaps he would have not gotten so far off path. They looked the other way so many times because he was the star player and eventually he got so far lost into partying life that he ended up losing it all. What a shame and waste of talent.

It sounds like even though others have shared their stories and examples this still feels over the top for you. If you are uncomfortable with the devilery of the message that is probably setting a tone for the program, you might indeed want to look at alternatives.

We had alcohol and drug testing for all competitors at the beginning of the season and random testing throughout the year for my kids of all competitive events, so yeah, that Academic Team member is treated the same as the Football jock.

I think the photo thing is ridiculous. We have alcohol in our house. We, as a family, attend functions with alcohol and always have a Designated Driver. Our kids have been raised with a healthy attitude towards alcohol but it is in their presence and there may be pictures of people drinking at a BBQ/Christmas/New Year's party or two with drinking and the kids in the picture. They weren't drinking they were just at the party. I get it that some kids are partiers and use alcohol and drugs but the no pictures rule seems extreme without context.

I would look into why they do the presentation like they do. We've had those meetings and though they went over the drug/alcohol policies and that that would result in being kicked off the team and could have ramifications that follow the student (guess some try to move schools etc.) as it is reported to our State's Athletic Association.

I have to admit I'm not a special snowflake parent but I'm a bit gobby at a game. Not abusive but more along the lines. "What are you looking at ref!" "oh come on" etc. And I was threatened to be kicked out by the ref. The School official onsite was cool about it, thankfully. But I'm really annoyed because I have heard much worse at many other games and no sanctions. I really think it was because I'm a woman and knew the rules.