luvnlifelady
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,428
Jun 26, 2014 2:34:35 GMT
|
Post by luvnlifelady on Sept 6, 2015 21:36:09 GMT
AKathy was sweet to send me a message checking in on me so I thought I'd check in here too.
I did ask DH to go to lunch on Tuesday and we talked about it some. I asked him if he shares stuff about us with the guy (I already knew the answer from reading a few texts) and he sort of tried to deflect it a bit but I just said "I really don't appreciate you sharing stuff about us with him." I personally don't think it's a good idea for a married guy to spend so much time with a single guy. He doesn't understand the ups and downs of married life and such but that's just me. We went out Thursday night and had to wait outside the bar while waiting for a table and I know for a fact that he sent the guy a text then. Not the end of the world but it's just another notation. There was a problem with our medical insurance billing so that should be straightened out soon and then I plan to seek individual counseling. I know there must be stuff from my childhood and my history with him playing into my insecurities about this, but just for the record, I still feel like there's something hinky going on. We're getting along fine so there's no mad rush to figure this out but I think getting my own crap sorted out first would be a good place to start. Thanks for all your support as we figure this out.
|
|
YooHoot
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,432
Jun 26, 2014 3:11:50 GMT
|
Post by YooHoot on Sept 6, 2015 22:32:51 GMT
No advice, just a hug and an offer to take you for margaritas if I could!
|
|
luvnlifelady
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,428
Jun 26, 2014 2:34:35 GMT
|
Post by luvnlifelady on Sept 6, 2015 22:47:34 GMT
Hey I'll take you up on the hug and Margaritas! Make it a double, strawberry please.
|
|
bellemagic
Junior Member
Baking Aunties Cookies
Posts: 64
Jun 26, 2014 0:58:08 GMT
|
Post by bellemagic on Sept 6, 2015 23:04:54 GMT
Please do yourself a favor and get tested for STDs. There is a chance your husband is sexually active outside of your relationship and you need to be proactive when dealing with your health. If insurance is an issue please find a Planned Parenthood or a local Women's shelter they will be able to help you out, possibly with even the counseling. I wish you peace and love as you go forward with this journey.
|
|
scrappinmama
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,017
Jun 26, 2014 12:54:09 GMT
|
Post by scrappinmama on Sept 6, 2015 23:18:17 GMT
Thanks for updating. I've been wondering how you are doing. Hugs to you. Counseling is a great idea. I think working on yourself should be a priority. You will feel better about yourself in the long run. And like belle magic suggested, I suggest getting checked for STDs. It couldn't hurt to get checked out.
|
|
|
Post by lostwithout2peas on Sept 6, 2015 23:26:55 GMT
Just wanted to say good luck And my prayers are with you!
|
|
|
Post by scrapmaven on Sept 7, 2015 2:24:51 GMT
I think that his violation of trust from prior behavior never truly heals completely. So, I think you're smart to go into individual therapy and keep your eyes open. He is behaving mysteriously and as a former cheater he should be much more compassionate and open if he has nothing to hide. This could be a simple matter of avoiding your sister. If that's the case he needs too be honest w/you and allow you to deal w/the situation as a team. I'm sorry you have this worry about your husband's fidelity. You deserve absolute love and honesty from your husband.
|
|
|
Post by SabrinaM on Sept 7, 2015 3:23:28 GMT
I think you're smart to listen to your gut! Going with the flow until you can regroup isn't a bad idea.
|
|
|
Post by papercrafteradvocate on Apr 7, 2016 13:58:36 GMT
Any changes on this bro-dating? This popped into my mind last night!
|
|
luvnlifelady
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,428
Jun 26, 2014 2:34:35 GMT
|
Post by luvnlifelady on Apr 7, 2016 14:09:08 GMT
Not officially but he has seemed to be home more and not making them up as readily if they miss a week. For example, he is missing tomorrow for DS' concert and I asked if he was making it up tonight or Saturday and he said he doesn't know. He has taken up more of a liking to going out geocaching on Saturday mornings (not every week) with another friend and I think realized going out Friday makes him too tired for that.
He was also trying out going on a different night but that seems hit or miss depending on what's going on that week with the family.
Of course, the Saturday morning thing could be just a false front for other things. However, I am FB friends with the guy he goes with and he often posts pics while they are out. They are gone for awhile and get lunch etc. but I feel better about that than the Friday thing.
I have started a new job where I will be gone many afternoon/early evenings so we will see how that works. DS is old enough to stay home alone (and DD will be moving back home next month) so not sure if it will affect (sp) his outings or not.
Overall, things seem ok with us. We spent a good bit of time together last week when DS was gone visiting DD. Last night we spent some time watching baseball together and we have our weekly Walking Dead time.
Thanks for asking.
|
|