pridemom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,843 
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Post by pridemom on Sept 22, 2015 17:37:46 GMT
You can't measure yourself against anyone else, especially against what people put on social media.
I just posted about another medical blow to my family. I am stressed. How does it manifest? My blood pressure, my autoimmune disease gets worse, and my weight. In really bad times, I break out in hives.
How do I cope? Prayer, spending time with my hubby, and when needed medication.
Each of us reacts differently and we all have different coping skills. Don't give up. It may be time for adjustment of your meds. Hugs.
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Post by mrsscrapdiva on Sept 22, 2015 17:48:34 GMT
I just wanted to say I totally get what you are saying about being able to deal with stuff thrown your way or even everything things. I had a huge breakdown this morning over something stupid but it is because things have been building up for a long time. I have been in counselling the past 4 years and I am on daily medication but somedays that just isn't enough.
It makes me think how many other people are hurting too. The difference is we all have different levels of coping skills, different support systems, etc. I think a lot of people seem like they are holding it together but deep inside they are broken. Comparing my life to other people's lives has done me no favors, it isn't healthy.
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Post by twinks on Sept 22, 2015 18:01:38 GMT
Stress, like happiness, is a very personal thing. What I have found works for me may not for you. At one point in my life I was feeling particularly stressed, much like you are feeling now. I have an daughter with very severe and complex neurological challenges that, at that particular time, was taking up 24/7 of my time and I was constantly giving and doing something for her. She lasted 16 days! in school that year before her doctors pulled her out. I was taking my turn with the care giving of my dying mother which required my driving to a town 40 miles away from me - 3 times a week minimum. I was cooking and taking in freezer meals and cleaning her house because that is something that I could do and I am good at. When it was my month of "on" (rotated through siblings)then I was taking her to doctor appointments, dialysis, etc. on top of the 3 days minimum. Towards the end we had a weekly "on" which meant we were at the hospital every day (my mom was hospitalized for 5 weeks before she died). I am a single parent and have to work full time and juggle that. My financial situation is always a stress for me, but, I have it figured out now so I don't stress about it. I was feeling stressed to the max!!!
The one thing that has struck me the biggest when I feel stressed or discouraged is to NEVER (and I mean NEVER) COMPARE myself to someone else. Everyone has stress. Everyone has problems. Everyone has their own situations that can be stressful. Everyone has things where they find happiness. If I look at others lives I will ALWAYS find myself coming up short.
When I look at people, I look at them and can be happy for them, or have empathy for them. I don't look at them in a way to compare myself to them. For example, I look at jenjie, and I admire her grace in a very heart wrenching situation in her life. I can show empathy towards her and care about her. Another example, my daughter's challenges are uniquely hers and mine to deal with. I can't say, "Well, Sarah has neurological challenges and she is in mainstream classes." If I do, I will end coming up short and more discouraged and stressed than ever.
When you compare yourself to others, you do not leave yourself open to noticing the great things that are happening in your own life. When I am stressed, depressed, etc. I just have to make a more intense look at what is happening around me. Notice something everyday to be grateful for, even if it is grateful that it is a new day and the mistakes of yesterday are behind me.
Sorry you are so stressed right now. Hugs!
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Post by katieanna on Sept 22, 2015 18:04:47 GMT
((((Hugs)))) and prayers mental illness makes it harder for people to handle even ordinary day to day life never mind any stress at all. You're struggling with your illness and that's why you can't deal with the stress in your life. Don't compare yourself to others - you are you and you can handle what YOU can handle. as for stress relief - exercise, fresh air, eating right work best for me - although when I'm struggling I tend to reach for chocolate and hibernation instead. Well said. Very good advice and I hope you feel better soon, Elannah. Is it possible that you are also coping with some depression? My problem had been a combination of the two. |
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Post by katiekaty on Sept 22, 2015 19:23:07 GMT
hobbies, reading books that are just plain fun and escape-it has been ages since I read a book that has great substance, Cooking shows and rerun DIY shows, avoid SUCKERS-people who emotionally, time-wise, physically, etc suck me dry, eating healthy snacks-or just plain snacking on food that moves me and my soul(usually the simple stuff), cooking with my son in the evenings (we think we are the world's greatest chefs LOL, after all we watch Cooking shows and steal recipes from Pinterest), only eat with friendly people (hostile or difficult people make eating stressful), PETS (they don't know how to cause stress, they just are there ready to be with you, focused on you). Take five minutes here and there at work alone and don't talk or think, just be. Don't let anyone suck you in-they will try. Stay as neutral as possible. remember the five minutes thing.
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