S/O What things are your parents positive you did...

I'm pretty sure my parents are convinced I was a virgin when I got married. I dated dh for 5 years and didn't loose my virginity until 3 months before the wedding. I really tried to be the bride legitimately wearing white.

caught the barn on fire. I was there when it happened, but I didn't do it. A little girl who belonged to the itinerant farm help my grandfather hired brought the matches up to the barn.  We were actually not supposed to even play with any of the help, however we would always sneak and do it.   She decided to burn a few sticks in the barn and the hay caught.  She took off running and my cousin and I tried to put the fire out (we were 5 years old) an Uncle saw the smoke and came running.  Both of us got spankings and grounded for the fire.  We never told on the little girl. 

My mother is convinced that I'm the one who contrived the slip and slide through our garage by running the hose through it and dumping laundry detergent in the running water. Actually, it was my brother's idea, but since he was only 3 and I was 6, I can understand why I got blamed.

My father, on the other hand, was convinced that anything that ever went wrong with my cars was my fault for no logical reason. For example, I worked at a mall. One night someone must have backed into my car because the bumper was dinged. The damage was so minor that I'd not even noticed it. Then, apparently someone sat on the hood of my car at a football game and dented it slightly. Again, I wasn't there and never noticed, but my eagle-eyed father did. The real doozy, though, was when HE had been working on belts in my car before I drove back to college. On my drive back, one of those belts slipped off, knocking my water pump through my radiator. But was the damage his fault? Nope, I had to have been driving too fast.

The biggest stand out episode is when about $1000 disappeared from a drawer in my parents' livingroom. It was in that drawer for months, and my mother noticed it missing a few days after my brother had an unsupervised birthdayparty in the livingroom with his 12-13-year old classmates. My mother is to this day, 20 years later, convinced it was me, because there had been a chair up against that drawer at the birthdayparty. Really??
This incident comes up in conversation on a regular basis. 20 years later. Always with blame on me *sigh* For the record; I didn't do it!

Oh, and I also didn't steal my older sister's vodka and replaced it with water. That was my 13-year old brother. But that has all been cleared up by now and is actually a funny story. Wasn't funny when I was 17 though...

My mother is convinced that the one time I got caught while sneaking out at night (took a boat out with a guy, boat broke down, got towed back in) was the ONLY time I snuck out. I told my friends that once, they about died laughing.

Smoked, did drugs, drank....I can say with 100% I did none and till this day have not!
My girlfriends are dying to turn me bad...have been for years.

My mom is positive that when I was backing out of a parking space on ice that I was just gunning it and that's how I hit the car behind me. But I truly wasn't gunning it and just hit the ice just right. She wouldn't hear me though, $2k in damage in the 90s, and she was just pissed.  

Same here, although I recently found out that my daughter thought the wedge pillows we had in our bedroom to help with DH's snoring (or after an accident or something - I can't remember why we bought them) were actually sex position pillows.