kate
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,517
Location: The city that doesn't sleep
Site Supporter
Jun 26, 2014 3:30:05 GMT
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Post by kate on Dec 1, 2015 3:18:18 GMT
I'm a happy CPAP wife now! DH used to snore, and then he'd have these pauses in his breathing - I'd be awake half the night, waiting to nudge him when he stopped breathing. It happened slowly over time, so I didn't even realize how bad it had become. The CPAP changed both of our lives for the better.
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tanya2
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1604
Posts: 4,423
Jun 27, 2014 2:27:09 GMT
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Post by tanya2 on Dec 1, 2015 3:26:27 GMT
I usually let my dh go up to bed before me, so he has time to fall asleep before I come in. Once he's asleep he doesnt wake up easily and for those who are light sleepers - earplugs are your friend! What earplugs do you recommend? I got some for my daughter who is in college and lives in the dorm (she has a lot of trouble sleeping because her roommate snores pretty loudly). The ones I got didn't work for her at all. I tried one too (Macky's silicone) and it didn't work for me either. Maybe we aren't putting them in our ears correctly? I don't know what brand they are but my dh goes to the NHRA races & he brings home the ones that they hand out there. They may not be in your ears tight enough? I know when I wear my earbuds with my phone at the gym I can always tell if they aren't in enough if I can still hear surrounding noise
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Post by kellybelly77 on Dec 1, 2015 3:43:10 GMT
I feel your pain. I finally got my hubby to go for a sleep study last month. One night he went to bed before me and started snoring. I recorded him on my phone as I walked from our living room to our bedroom. It was bad. I then called before his next appointment with our doctor to have the doctor ask. It worked. He got his CPAP last week and is already feeling better rested when he wakes. I actually downloaded a decibel meter app for my phone and measure him sometimes! More than anything to prove to him how loud he is because he doesn't think it's that bad.
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Post by peasful1 on Dec 1, 2015 5:23:14 GMT
I will support you leaving him on the couch. Dh's snoring irritates the hell out of me. That plus his ability to fall asleep 30 sec after closing his eyes makes it hard not to hit him at night Same!!! Last night I said "SNORING!" three times to him, but he started back up within a minute each time. I gave up and moved into my college daughter's empty bedroom. Ugh. How come I have to be the one to leave my cozy bed? I am so sick of his snoring! How do you expect him to curb the snoring by yelling at him? Do you seriously think it's under his control and he's just doing it to piss you off? Jesus.
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tanya2
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1604
Posts: 4,423
Jun 27, 2014 2:27:09 GMT
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Post by tanya2 on Dec 1, 2015 5:34:10 GMT
I tend to snore the most when I first fall asleep before I hit that deep sleep - so waking me up all night long is totally counter-productive! I just snore more for a longer period of time - and then am super bitchy in the morning because I'm extra tired from being woken up all night long. Oh yes, just ask a snorer to stop when they are dead asleep - yeah, that should work good thing my dh doesn't have any issues with it. I am however, very aware that I can never fall asleep in a public place like on an airplane
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mlana
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,523
Jun 27, 2014 19:58:15 GMT
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Post by mlana on Dec 1, 2015 8:23:33 GMT
My DH has always snored very loudly. We finally decided that separate bedrooms were a must for us if we were going to continue being married.
I didn't realize that his snoring had gotten even worse until we went on a cruise in 2013. He refused to do anything about it, so I left him alone.
The Drs think his very bad sleep apnea played a big part in his stroke last February. I am really sure that it also played a major part in his depression.
Since he had a sleep study done and got his machine, he is truly a new man. Within a week, he was no longer coming home and taking a nap after work. He stopped falling asleep after his nap and he changed his bedtime to later than 9:30 pm. He also found out that he wasn't waking up to pee every hour because of his new blood pressure mess; he was waking up from the apnea and then getting up to pee.
I can honestly tell you I never thought it would make this much of a difference in our lives. Last week we went somewhere and spent the night and I never heard him snore even once. The machine was so quiet, I wasn't even sure it was on.
I been referred for a study and I'm trying to get an appointment for just after the new year. If it makes as much a difference in my life as his did in his life, I don't know what I'll do with all my new energy. LOL
Marcy
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eastcoastpea
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,252
Jun 27, 2014 13:05:28 GMT
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Post by eastcoastpea on Dec 1, 2015 10:08:20 GMT
I've tried lots of things, but not essential oils. Usually a good swift elbow to his side will get him to roll over and stop the snoring long enough for me to get back to sleep! I used to be able to give my husband a nudge and then he would stop. Now, I have to give him a good shove and sometimes it still won't stop. I actually accidentally woke him up the other night when I was trying to get him to roll onto his side. He complained that I snore too. I told him that when my snores wake him up or keeps him from sleeping, like his sometimes does to me, he's welcome to nudge me to get me to stop.
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Post by maryland on Dec 1, 2015 12:30:59 GMT
What earplugs do you recommend? I got some for my daughter who is in college and lives in the dorm (she has a lot of trouble sleeping because her roommate snores pretty loudly). The ones I got didn't work for her at all. I tried one too (Macky's silicone) and it didn't work for me either. Maybe we aren't putting them in our ears correctly? I don't know what brand they are but my dh goes to the NHRA races & he brings home the ones that they hand out there. They may not be in your ears tight enough? I know when I wear my earbuds with my phone at the gym I can always tell if they aren't in enough if I can still hear surrounding noise We probably don't have them in tight enough. We aren't used to wearing earplugs, so we are probably afraid to put them in our ears the proper way. I should try a sporting goods store, thanks for the tip!
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Dec 1, 2015 13:01:09 GMT
I must be the only person on the planet who doesn't mind my husband's snoring. He can sound like a buzz saw. I like hearing him next to me and would hate silence. But I will confess I sleep like a log and nothing much would keep me awake when I am tired. That's me, too, but I think we're definitely in the minority. My husband only snores when really over-tired or with a head cold, so there's that too. I'm sympathetic for those who struggle with spouses' loud snoring though. Lack of sleep is problematic on so many levels.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 19, 2024 17:07:47 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 1, 2015 14:02:21 GMT
Same!!! Last night I said "SNORING!" three times to him, but he started back up within a minute each time. I gave up and moved into my college daughter's empty bedroom. Ugh. How come I have to be the one to leave my cozy bed? I am so sick of his snoring! How do you expect him to curb the snoring by yelling at him? Do you seriously think it's under his control and he's just doing it to piss you off? Jesus. Hey thanks for making giant assumptions like you are in my bedroom with me. What a kind person you are to curse at me. FYI he has asked me to let him know by saying snoring and nudge him. He usually rolls over when I do that and it stops temporarily - enough so I can get back to sleep. Not sure why you decided to say I think he's doing it to piss me off. I read him your post and he laughed. As I explained in my later post, we all desperately need sleep. It gets frustrating, as others have stated, when they won't do a sleep study or lose weight, or whatever it is that is causing the issue.
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Post by kellybelly77 on Dec 1, 2015 15:06:10 GMT
Same!!! Last night I said "SNORING!" three times to him, but he started back up within a minute each time. I gave up and moved into my college daughter's empty bedroom. Ugh. How come I have to be the one to leave my cozy bed? I am so sick of his snoring! How do you expect him to curb the snoring by yelling at him? Do you seriously think it's under his control and he's just doing it to piss you off? Jesus. You didn't direct this to me but I feel like I need to respond! I am the OP and my dh snores like a freaking train. I have asked him multiple times to go to the DR to have it looked at. He refuses to go. I get very few hours of sleep each night anyway and between him and the baby, I get woken up 4 or 5 times a night during the 6 hours I am in bed. Getting a few hours of sleep in 45 minute bursts makes me perpetually exhausted and cranky and Ill be honest, a little shouty at him. Why should my sleep have to suffer so badly because he refuses to be an adult and go to the DR for what could be a medical problem? If he refuses to get it checked out and wakes the house up I feel like my shoutyness is well placed.
Our dd has a bedroom in the basement, the floor below us, and she can hear him down there. It's not a few minutes of light snoring. It's a freaking freight train in my ear all effing night. So excuse me if I am not happy as a lark even though he can't control it.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Dec 1, 2015 15:54:08 GMT
How do you expect him to curb the snoring by yelling at him? Do you seriously think it's under his control and he's just doing it to piss you off? Jesus. You didn't direct this to me but I feel like I need to respond! I am the OP and my dh snores like a freaking train. I have asked him multiple times to go to the DR to have it looked at. He refuses to go. I get very few hours of sleep each night anyway and between him and the baby, I get woken up 4 or 5 times a night during the 6 hours I am in bed. Getting a few hours of sleep in 45 minute bursts makes me perpetually exhausted and cranky and Ill be honest, a little shouty at him. Why should my sleep have to suffer so badly because he refuses to be an adult and go to the DR for what could be a medical problem? If he refuses to get it checked out and wakes the house up I feel like my shoutyness is well placed.
Our dd has a bedroom in the basement, the floor below us, and she can hear him down there. It's not a few minutes of light snoring. It's a freaking freight train in my ear all effing night. So excuse me if I am not happy as a lark even though he can't control it.
I will validate you, kellybelly77 because that was my DH too. He could be heard across the house and through TWO closed doors. My DH would go in for his routine checkups because his BP was high (no surprise there, it's one of the side effects of having sleep apnea) but he still wouldn't ever bring it up with his doctor. He would always tell me it was MY problem if I couldn't sleep because he was loud and thrashing around all night long! I would go without sleep myself night after night for weeks on end because of it, so I would get pretty stabby too. It would be one thing if it was just the occasional night of snoring after being out having a few cocktails, being sick or whatever, but when it's EVERY night, all night, it gets old really fast. I was so thankful when his friends ribbed him about it endlessly on that snowmobiling trip. Since most of them use CPAP machines themselves, they could give firsthand accounts of how much better they started feeling since they started using one and told him what a big baby he was being for not getting it checked out. I think it kind of took the stigma he was putting on it away once he realized just how many of his friends use one. Maybe the snoring isn't under a person's control while they're sleeping, but going in and getting the underlying causes for it looked at IS. Especially when you have someone right there next to you night after night witnessing it and telling you there is something going on.
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mallie
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,253
Jul 3, 2014 18:13:13 GMT
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Post by mallie on Dec 1, 2015 17:15:19 GMT
I tend to snore the most when I first fall asleep before I hit that deep sleep - so waking me up all night long is totally counter-productive! I just snore more for a longer period of time - and then am super bitchy in the morning because I'm extra tired from being woken up all night long. Oh yes, just ask a snorer to stop when they are dead asleep - yeah, that should work good thing my dh doesn't have any issues with it. I am however, very aware that I can never fall asleep in a public place like on an airplane And here's the reverse -- those of us who get woken up all night long by the other person snoring are super bitchy because we're extra tired too. Moreover, studies have shown a serious negative impact on the health of those woken up repeatedly during sleep on a regular basis. At the very least, being repeatedly woken up during an eight hour "night" means your body feels like it's only gotten 4 hours sleep, at best. There are other, more serious, consequences as well. So even if a snorer doesn't care about their own health, it's a really selfish knob who doesn't care enough about the health of the people they are supposed to love to seek help to stop the deleterious behavior.
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Post by Lexica on Dec 1, 2015 18:29:12 GMT
Some doctors offer at-home apnea testing. My father arranged to have the guy come to their house while they slept. I wouldn't be comfortable with that myself, but he appreciated it and had a very professional technician for his. He was diagnosed with apnea and lived to be 90 years old.
Kaiser provides these kits to take home to use overnight. You just return everything to a collection box the next day and you are notified with your results.
Since apnea can KILL you, I think it is worth doing whatever you can to support your snoring partner to get tested.
And those that do actually die are the ones that I consider better off than those that ALMOST DIE. A friend of mine knows a couple where the man refused to get tested. His pregnant wife woke to him moving around in the bed, as had happened before, but this time, she couldn't wake him up. He was rushed to the hospital where he was eventually declared too brain damaged to ever return to normal. The wife felt so guilty that she just slept beside him as his body was suffocating. He still remains in a care facility, but will never recover. Honestly, I would rather have died if it were me.
I know not every person that snores has apnea, but for those that might, please do whatever you can to help them realize what they are gambling with. And if they refuse still, I would insist on them purchasing a large insurance policy to provide for the family they leave behind. It is no minor issue.
Would they ignore cancer? How about leaving diabetes untreated? Or, as an article on apnea states, if someone broke into your home and repeatedly put a pillow over their face, suffocating them again and again, sometimes for 50+ times an hour, every single night, damaging brain cells and organs, would they do nothing? It the height of selfishness and total lack of regard for their family, and I couldn't live a gamble like that.
Knowing what I now know, and having discovered I had apnea myself and how much better I feel now, I couldn't accept "no" as an answer. If my partner was willing to risk having me deal with their death or developing strokes, high blood pressure, heart attacks, and the list of damages that occur to the human body from being systematically suffocated night after night, I couldn't respect or trust that person to be there for my later years. I may as well find another man (or woman as the case may be) and avoid putting myself and my children through something that could be totally avoided in one night's worth of testing. That is just too darned selfish and shows zero care for my future.
Wives, talk to your spouse when they are awake and do whatever it takes to get your spouse tested. And if you snore, same recommendation to you.
Doctors used to think that only severely obese men had apnea. They now know it occurs in women and even children, regardless of your weight.
I was thin and active when my fiancé told me I snored a bit, not even loudly, and stopped breathing at times. I had no clue I was doing any snoring at all. I did, however have issues with eating certain dry foods where they would get stuck in my throat and wouldn't wash down with a drink of water. Rice, bread, and poultry were the biggest issues. I still have to be super careful to sip water with every single bite or it hurts like hell until I vomit it back out. Disgusting. This started for me right after my surgery on my neck. I don't know if it is scar tissue, the size of the metal plate in my throat area, or what the cause is, but the narrow passage seems to contribute to me having the airway close off while sleeping.
Please, beg, threaten, cajole, or somehow impress upon your partner how very serious this is.
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