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Oct 6, 2024 10:21:40 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 28, 2014 18:53:00 GMT
DH met his sister 3 years ago who was adopted. Never knew anything about her. His mom gave her up for adoption before she was married. She is the absolute greatest! However, my SILs have each met her once and are not the least bit interested and MIL has no interest in meeting her. I feel so bad for my new SIL. Now, I'll admit my ILs are dysfunctional and I don't really have much of a relationship with any of them, but this is unbelievable to me. Also, new SIL has no idea who her father is. Even DH tip toes around his mother on this issue. It is not really my place to get involved due to the fragile relationship with my ILs, but I just wish there was something more I could do.
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Post by meowgal on Jul 28, 2014 19:16:29 GMT
Sounds as if DH and his "new" sister have a good relationship and that is what needs to be concentrated on right now. Maybe the rest will come, but I'm not sure I'd get involved.
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Post by Scarlet Ohana on Jul 28, 2014 19:20:56 GMT
I'm was adopted at birth. I do know my mother's name and she did pass away a few years ago, but I never did meet her or talk to her. I know of my half sisters on Facebook, but I've never notified them. I have no idea if they even know I exist. I feel like I have enough family drama in my life, that I don't want to add to it.
My brother who was adopted as well, did meet his birth mother. I'm not sure what he was expecting, but he was disappointed. She had my brother as a teenager and it seems like she had a pretty rough life and now she was a full fledged motorcycle gangish type lady, pretty hard core. I feel sorry for his mother, because now she wants to be involved with him and my niece, but my brother has shut her out. My brother is kind of a jerk (that's a whole other long story), but I think if you are going to go and seek out your birth family you should plan on them wanting to be a part of your life, just like you should plan that they don't want anything to do with you.
I think all you can do OP is just be kind to your new SIL and maybe involve her in events where your IL's are not at. Sounds like your MIL was hoping that she never contacted her, and you have to know that may happen when you look for your birth parents.
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Post by omarakbt on Jul 28, 2014 19:27:55 GMT
My DD met her BM when she ( DD) turned 18. They ended up not staying in contact, DD's choice but overall the meeting was positive. DD has 5 half siblings she hasn't met and at some point one or all of them may come calling.
DD's DH has a half sister that was given up for adoption and reunited with her bio mom, SIL's mom when she was 25. They have an excellent relationship, she came out with her family for the wedding.
At some point DD may wish to renew her relationship with her bio mom but at this point she is content with having met her and learned what she wanted to learn
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