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Post by librarylady on Apr 4, 2016 3:13:30 GMT
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pudgygroundhog
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,648 
Location: The Grand Canyon
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Post by pudgygroundhog on Apr 4, 2016 3:20:03 GMT
I listened to the author's interview on Fresh Air and thought it was interesting as well. She made some good points.
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Post by lucyg on Apr 4, 2016 3:58:32 GMT
You need to stop making me THINK all the time like this. (thank you)  |
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AllieC
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,086
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Post by AllieC on Apr 4, 2016 10:15:57 GMT
Thanks for sharing this, very interesting and really important to talk about.
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Post by melanell on Apr 4, 2016 13:02:32 GMT
I agree that this is very important. And this part really caught my attention...about not giving girls names for their genitalia.
"so we never talk about the vulva, we never talk about the clitoris"
I see this with adult women quite often. Women often don't use these words, for some reason. I see and her well-educated women referring to their entire exterior reproductive area as their "vagina". And I don't understand why we have started to do that, or why we continue to do it. Why have we decided that "vagina" is the only anatomical word acceptable for us to regularly use?
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Post by melanell on Apr 4, 2016 13:53:12 GMT
I also thought that the last bit of the article, about virginity, was interesting. We see a changing in the idea of what that word means. But all of the definitions do seem to regard the loss of virginity as only something happening between a girl and a guy. The virginity of a girl who is only having sex with another girl is often ignored. And the definition given by the young woman in the article would probably not be one the many heterosexual girls would want to use, provided they even care about the concept at all.
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Post by librarylady on Apr 4, 2016 14:01:14 GMT
Ever since Monica and Bill I have thought about the oral sex and virginity from time to time....
* If a girl engages in oral sex with a man--is she still a virgin? (medically yes, I'd say, but socially I'm not so sure)
Interesting that the author points out that the females are giving oral sex, but not receiving............
--I could go on, but the article gives some thoughts to ponder. Glad I don't have a teenager to worry about anymore.
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Post by melanell on Apr 4, 2016 14:10:56 GMT
Ever since Monica and Bill I have thought about the oral sex and virginity from time to time.... * If a girl engages in oral sex with a man--is she still a virgin? (medically yes, I'd say, but socially I'm not so sure) I think I tend to hear/see 3 different categories in regards to this. Those who say "No. She's not a virgin if a guy has had his penis in her at all." Those who follow the "anything but" line of thought, which lines up with the medical definition. As long as there has been no vaginal intercourse, then she's still a virgin. Then there seems to be an idea, especially among younger people, that women now have multiple categories in which to lose their virginity---oral, anal, etc. (I wonder if this line of thought is at all influenced or strengthened by the fact that society now regularly uses "virgin" to mean anyone who hasn't done/tried any given thing. We're say we're a skydiving virgin or a house-buying virgin or a sushi virgin.) But all of these changing definitions for heterosexual women still leave also the questions of what does the term mean for both heterosexual men and for homosexual or bisexual individuals of any gender. |
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Post by anxiousmom on Apr 4, 2016 14:54:30 GMT
Ever since Monica and Bill I have thought about the oral sex and virginity from time to time.... * If a girl engages in oral sex with a man--is she still a virgin? (medically yes, I'd say, but socially I'm not so sure) Interesting that the author points out that the females are giving oral sex, but not receiving............ --I could go on, but the article gives some thoughts to ponder. Glad I don't have a teenager to worry about anymore. We are all pretty open around here in the anxious household and I remember asking one of the boys (this was right after the a boy/girl got caught in the boy's bathroom with her giving him a blow job) whether or not he thought it was fair. Fair?? he asked? W That started an interesting discussion on what oral sex meant, was it really sex, why was it okay for a girl to give and not receive and just as important in my opinion WHY a girl would be willing to a BJ in a stinky boy's bathroom. Was it a low self-esteemed attempt at popularity, love, acceptance?? It was a difficult conversation to have to be sure. Talking about sex is difficult enough, talking about emotions and feelings with a teenage boy is damn near impossible, but when you have to start talking about mutual pleasure and the fact that yes, girls have orgasms and masturbate too?? OMG, words can not even describe. I hope though in the long run it will be remembered. And along those same lines-here is another interesting article about how current YA fiction can actually help with the discussions about sex, consent, rape culture, etc. www.npr.org/2016/04/01/472584700/when-it-comes-to-talking-sex-young-adult-books-can-be-a-parents-best-friend?utm_source=twitter.com&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=npr&utm_term=nprnews&utm_content=20160404 |
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Post by brina on Apr 4, 2016 15:52:07 GMT
some excellent points to ponder and discuss with both my sons and my daughter
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