quiltz
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Posts: 6,840
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Jun 29, 2014 16:13:28 GMT
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Post by quiltz on Apr 8, 2016 1:23:23 GMT
lucyg - a grown male (23) and female older family member sharing a room is simply ikky in my opinion and I don't have a dirty mind. Would you agree that a 23 year old niece share a room with her older uncle? We come from different backgrounds & hotel room sharing between male & female family members of adult ages is not considered appropriate. Each family to what ever they are comfortable with.
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Post by lucyg on Apr 8, 2016 1:27:56 GMT
lucyg - a grown male (23) and female older family member sharing a room is simply ikky in my opinion and I don't have a dirty mind. Would you agree that a 23 year old niece share a room with her older uncle? We come from different backgrounds & hotel room sharing between male & female family members of adult ages is not considered appropriate. Each family to what ever they are comfortable with. I would have no problem with my adult daughter sharing a room with any of her uncles, once again assuming both parties were comfortable with the idea. You did not say "this is how we do it in my family." You said it is "a big deal" and simply not done. You are welcome to do it however you like in your family, but please refrain from implying (actually, coming right out and saying) that there's something wrong with MY family. ETA never mind. I can be just as judgmental. I'm sorry, carry on.
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Post by littlemama on Apr 8, 2016 1:36:56 GMT
SIL in one room. Your family in the other.
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Post by 950nancy on Apr 8, 2016 1:47:59 GMT
I would pay for my own room and not sleep with other people if I happened to be the SIL.
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GiantsFan
Prolific Pea
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Jun 27, 2014 14:44:56 GMT
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Post by GiantsFan on Apr 8, 2016 1:55:00 GMT
lucyg - a grown male (23) and female older family member sharing a room is simply ikky in my opinion and I don't have a dirty mind. Would you agree that a 23 year old niece share a room with her older uncle? We come from different backgrounds & hotel room sharing between male & female family members of adult ages is not considered appropriate. Each family to what ever they are comfortable with. I'm with lucyg on this. I'm 48 and would have no problem sharing a two bed room with my 26 yo nephew. Only one bed? Probably not. But we've stayed in the same tent, IMO a hotel room would offer more privacy than a tent. He probably wouldn't want to stay with me though. I go to bed early and use a CPAP machine.
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TXMary
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And so many nights I just dream of the ocean. God, I wish I was sailin' again.
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Jun 26, 2014 17:25:06 GMT
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Post by TXMary on Apr 8, 2016 1:57:48 GMT
Well, I originally thought girls in one room and boys in the other. But the point of two beds in each room and giving SIL her own room makes sense too. Then I started thinking about my own nephews who are 27 and 29. DH and I have been traveling with them since they were little boys. We have taken them on many trips including cruises and out of the country. We have shared cabins and hotel rooms on many occasions. I would have no problem sharing a room with either of them. It wouldn't be a big deal in my family. There are two beds. I don't see a problem as long as everyone was comfortable with it. I guess my answer is you know your family and how comfortable everyone is with each other and what works best for y'all.
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Deleted
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Oct 1, 2024 7:36:35 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 8, 2016 2:20:55 GMT
I think every family is different. I would be happy to share a room with my adult nephew as we would stay up all night talking about his business he is just starting Alternatively I would share a room with my brother (if I was the SIL of the OP) as my brother and I are best friends and we would stay up talking about life and family
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Country Ham
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Jun 25, 2014 19:32:08 GMT
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Post by Country Ham on Apr 8, 2016 2:29:57 GMT
We would separate 2 adult males in one room, 2 adult females in the other. I would enjoy the girl time with my sister in law.
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SabrinaP
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Jun 26, 2014 12:16:22 GMT
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Post by SabrinaP on Apr 8, 2016 3:27:34 GMT
lucyg - a grown male (23) and female older family member sharing a room is simply ikky in my opinion and I don't have a dirty mind. Would you agree that a 23 year old niece share a room with her older uncle? We come from different backgrounds & hotel room sharing between male & female family members of adult ages is not considered appropriate. Each family to what ever they are comfortable with. I'm with lucyg on this. I'm 48 and would have no problem sharing a two bed room with my 26 yo nephew. Only one bed? Probably not. But we've stayed in the same tent, IMO a hotel room would offer more privacy than a tent. He probably wouldn't want to stay with me though. I go to bed early and use a CPAP machine. But in this case, why would he need to? If there is an extra bed in mom and dad's room wouldn't it be more comfortable for him to be in there instead of with his aunt?
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Post by katlady on Apr 8, 2016 3:37:08 GMT
I've shared a room with my aunt and uncle before (as an adult). My family is pretty comfortable with sharing rooms. So, it all depends on what you are comfortable with.
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Post by ~summer~ on Apr 8, 2016 3:40:24 GMT
Well I wouldn't split up from my husband. No way. So if SIL and son don't want to share a room (and I couldn't care less it would be up to them) then they would need an extra room. No way I'm sharing a room with my SIL and splitting up by gender.
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vanessa
Full Member
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Sept 15, 2015 4:25:10 GMT
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Post by vanessa on Apr 8, 2016 3:43:39 GMT
My husband and I always share a bed. We would agree to a suite where the other two had singles, or a suite with a single son and a private room for SIL. But really, we sleep together. No one else needs to be subjected to us snoring and doing whatever. It is what it is. Our kids typically stay in an adjoining room.
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Post by hop2 on Apr 8, 2016 3:55:22 GMT
Snorers in one room non snorers in the other room.
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Post by Yubon Peatlejuice on Apr 8, 2016 4:51:48 GMT
You really need to ask this question?
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Post by ktdoesntscrap on Apr 8, 2016 13:31:15 GMT
I just realized you would have to share a bed with your SIL.... Yeah I would be getting son his own room... or asking for a rollaway. if it was my sister I would be ok sharing. Two queen beds in each room I missed that... SIL would have her own room. I have nephews that age.. I think they would be uncomfortable sharing .. somehow it seems awkward if there were just two of you.. add a third and No big deal.
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Post by 3SugarBugs on Apr 8, 2016 13:43:29 GMT
I just have to giggle...if given the opportunity of having my own bed...no blanket tugging, no snoring, no farting...SIGN ME UP! So for that reason I say "girls are in this room and boys you are in that one!"
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Post by maryland on Apr 8, 2016 14:41:15 GMT
You and your husband in one bed and son in the other. Same room. But that's just how we do it with our kids because we can't usually afford the extra room. So that's the first thought that came to mind.
Sil gets her own room.
But if you are paying for both rooms, maybe you and sil can share a room.
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Post by maryland on Apr 8, 2016 14:48:16 GMT
lucyg - a grown male (23) and female older family member sharing a room is simply ikky in my opinion and I don't have a dirty mind. Would you agree that a 23 year old niece share a room with her older uncle? We come from different backgrounds & hotel room sharing between male & female family members of adult ages is not considered appropriate. Each family to what ever they are comfortable with. I would have no problem with my adult daughter sharing a room with any of her uncles, once again assuming both parties were comfortable with the idea. You did not say "this is how we do it in my family." You said it is "a big deal" and simply not done. You are welcome to do it however you like in your family, but please refrain from implying (actually, coming right out and saying) that there's something wrong with MY family. ETA never mind. I can be just as judgmental. I'm sorry, carry on. Our family does the same as yours. My kids have shared a room with their aunts at times and uncles at times. Not a problem in our family, everyone is comfortable and no one cares.
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Post by maryland on Apr 8, 2016 14:52:07 GMT
I just have to giggle...if given the opportunity of having my own bed...no blanket tugging, no snoring, no farting...SIGN ME UP! So for that reason I say "girls are in this room and boys you are in that one!" Haha, that's why my husband always wishes he could have his own room when traveling with me and the kids! Our daughters are so loud, and they burp, pass gas, are loud (yes, I said loud twice!), and messy! And I snore and steal the blanket. He says when he travels for work, the room stays clean, smells good, and he can sleep peacefully!
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grinningcat
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Jun 26, 2014 13:06:35 GMT
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Post by grinningcat on Apr 8, 2016 14:53:26 GMT
I would pay for my own room and not sleep with other people if I happened to be the SIL. This all the way. I am completely uninterested in sharing a room with a child (DS even if he's an adult) or siblings. There's a thing called privacy and I wouldn't be remotely interested in going on a vacation if sharing a room with anyone other than my DH is the arrangement. Even an adult child sharing with parents is weird and overcrowding in my opinion, there is no way in hell I would share with a niece or a nephew unless it was a suite with separate sleeping quarters. The correct solution is to either book a suite with the appropriate amount of rooms or to book a series of rooms that gives everyone their own space.
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J u l e e
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Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
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Post by J u l e e on Apr 8, 2016 14:59:52 GMT
There's a reason a thread like this can end up being pages long. We all have different frames of reference for this situation. I've never had a relationship with aunts or uncles beyond elementary school. I don't even know them now. I am 49 and my nephews are only 12 and 10, so that's completely different for me. I don't mind not sleeping in a room with my husband if it would be more comfortable for others to arrange it differently. I don't mind much. So I could live with just about any combination of beds and rooms. But that's just my answer. The other three people on my trip would likely all have their own answer as well.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Apr 8, 2016 15:19:18 GMT
Well, I originally thought girls in one room and boys in the other. But the point of two beds in each room and giving SIL her own room makes sense too. Then I started thinking about my own nephews who are 27 and 29. DH and I have been traveling with them since they were little boys. We have taken them on many trips including cruises and out of the country. We have shared cabins and hotel rooms on many occasions. I would have no problem sharing a room with either of them. It wouldn't be a big deal in my family. There are two beds. I don't see a problem as long as everyone was comfortable with it. I guess my answer is you know your family and how comfortable everyone is with each other and what works best for y'all. It wouldn't be a big deal for us either. We have two cabins, a hunting place and a lake cabin. The hunting cabin has dormitory quarters just outside of our bedroom with two sets of bunk beds, and the queen bed in our room makes it impossible to close the door so we might as well all be sleeping in the same room, LOL. People know this going in and no one has ever made an issue of it. Not family, not friends. It's a free place to flop if you want to hunt, ride snowmobiles or ATVs, LOL. People change clothes in the bathroom. It really hasn't ever been a big deal for us. At the present time, our lake cabin is kind of the same way because we're in the process of trying to finish the renovations there that MIL started several years before she died. Hopefully when we're done there will be a proper guest room, but for now there's not. We have our old king sized bed, our current king sized bed and DD's toddler bed all in the one part of the cabin that is climate controlled. It hasn't stopped anyone who has been invited from coming up for the weekend. In fact people WANT to come and more often than not we have to say no because it's currently a construction zone mess. LOL, DH has always maintained "It's a cabin. There is no expectation of privacy." The only time I have had a problem with sharing a hotel room with another family member was when we went to a family wedding with MIL (she paid for everything and made all the arrangements) who insisted on sleeping with the overhead lights on-- all.night.LONG! Ugh. She was afraid she would trip on something going to the bathroom at night. A quick visit to the local hardware store the next day solved that problem. We bought her a nightlight to plug in the bathroom wall socket! Ahhh, blissful (almost) darkness!
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freebird
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Posts: 6,927
Jun 25, 2014 20:06:48 GMT
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Post by freebird on Apr 8, 2016 15:24:53 GMT
You, husband and DS in one room. SIL in other.
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Post by compeateropeator on Apr 8, 2016 15:40:05 GMT
I agree with Julee. Everyone has their own comfort level and it all depends on the people involved. I would not even think twice about a grown niece or nephew sharing a room (I was going to say bunking with, but decided to try and use somewhat proper language ) with an Aunt or Uncle. l would (and do) share a room with my parents, with other family, and with good friends. Alone time is not needed when I am with these people, especially if I know it has an end date. I prefer my own room with business acquaintances and with group/tour type situations. But I would never not do something because I had to share a room. I was not a big fan of dorm living, and youth hostel (type) living when I was younger. But they allowed me to go to some cool places and do some memorable things. Anyway my answer for my family would be: parents and child in one room and aunt in the other.
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Post by gmcwife1 on Apr 8, 2016 15:50:51 GMT
Well, I originally thought girls in one room and boys in the other. But the point of two beds in each room and giving SIL her own room makes sense too. Then I started thinking about my own nephews who are 27 and 29. DH and I have been traveling with them since they were little boys. We have taken them on many trips including cruises and out of the country. We have shared cabins and hotel rooms on many occasions. I would have no problem sharing a room with either of them. It wouldn't be a big deal in my family. There are two beds. I don't see a problem as long as everyone was comfortable with it. I guess my answer is you know your family and how comfortable everyone is with each other and what works best for y'all. It wouldn't be a big deal for us either. We have two cabins, a hunting place and a lake cabin. The hunting cabin has dormitory quarters just outside of our bedroom with two sets of bunk beds, and the queen bed in our room makes it impossible to close the door so we might as well all be sleeping in the same room, LOL. People know this going in and no one has ever made an issue of it. Not family, not friends. It's a free place to flop if you want to hunt, ride snowmobiles or ATVs, LOL. People change clothes in the bathroom. It really hasn't ever been a big deal for us.At the present time, our lake cabin is kind of the same way because we're in the process of trying to finish the renovations there that MIL started several years before she died. Hopefully when we're done there will be a proper guest room, but for now there's not. We have our old king sized bed, our current king sized bed and DD's toddler bed all in the one part of the cabin that is climate controlled. It hasn't stopped anyone who has been invited from coming up for the weekend. In fact people WANT to come and more often than not we have to say no because it's currently a construction zone mess. LOL, DH has always maintained "It's a cabin. There is no expectation of privacy." I think this is closest to us, we do a lot of extended family things together. Everything from all sleeping at my mom's house for Christmas (2-5 families) to camping, to concerts and BIL also has a cabin on acreage. So we are pretty casual about things and it is not a big deal in our family at all to share spaces, sleeping, eating, etc. I would have no problem sharing a room with my 20 yr old nephew, my sisters would easily share a room with my 34 yr old son and I would let my 16 yr old dd share a room with her cousins or siblings. Actually Taylor (20 yr old niece) and Justin (20 yr old nephew) who are not siblings (they are step cousins) have shared a tent/sleeping spaces on several occasions. They are also the ones that shared a graduation party.
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momto4kiddos
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Jun 26, 2014 11:45:15 GMT
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Post by momto4kiddos on Apr 8, 2016 16:06:51 GMT
Girls share one, guys share the other
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Deleted
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Oct 1, 2024 7:36:35 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 8, 2016 16:41:08 GMT
If SIL is sister in law I would stick her into a room with you and your DS and husband into a room together. If SIL is son in law I would stick him in with your son and sleep with your husband.
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luckyexwife
Pearl Clutcher
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Jun 25, 2014 21:21:08 GMT
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Post by luckyexwife on Apr 8, 2016 17:11:45 GMT
There's a reason a thread like this can end up being pages long. We all have different frames of reference for this situation. I've never had a relationship with aunts or uncles beyond elementary school. I don't even know them now. I am 49 and my nephews are only 12 and 10, so that's completely different for me. I don't mind not sleeping in a room with my husband if it would be more comfortable for others to arrange it differently. I don't mind much. So I could live with just about any combination of beds and rooms. But that's just my answer. The other three people on my trip would likely all have their own answer as well. Exactly this. I've shared a bed and a bedroom with my sisters-in-law, no big deal for us. We've even shared a bathroom, one of us showering while the other uses the mirror and sink (we just let the other know when we are going to get out of the shower and the one getting ready steps out so the one in the shower can get out) It would be no big deal in my family to split up the rooms.
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Post by epeanymous on Apr 8, 2016 20:14:50 GMT
SIL gets her own room. You then decide whether you'd rather have DS in with you and DH or if you want him in a third room.
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edie3
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Jun 26, 2014 1:03:18 GMT
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Post by edie3 on Apr 8, 2016 21:37:22 GMT
thanks for the input. Did not expect this thread to be so long!
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