Post by Delta Dawn on Apr 17, 2016 0:26:08 GMT
Hi Peas,
This is not a fun sub-group to be in for sure. Losing a husband or boyfriend/lover whatever is devastating to all. I have a question for you. I am trying to help my dad cope through losing my mom. He is being invited to parties and receptions, out for dinner and to do stuff with his friends which I am eternally grateful.
He has a 50th anniversary party invite and doesn't want to go as my parents' 50th anniversary would have been in June and he just can't bear to go yet. I mean it has only been a month so I am not encouraging him to go at all. I don't want to set him back by any means.
He has an invite for a surprise 70th birthday party. He said that he thinks he will go to that. I hope he does because there is nothing significant or memorable about Mom's 70th birthday other than she had it.
How else can I support him through this. We are there for each other which is great. I am doing a lot better than he is for sure. Should I be doing anything else? I do all the laundry, all the cooking, I don't do much grocery shopping or anything to do with food decisions as my dad does all the shopping.(He knows I really don't like doing it). I just need to know how to take care of him. I wasn't married very long and I don't really know how to support a grieving man let along a dad. (I am crying now too. I am so sad and wish I could help him.) He said he would go to hospice for bereavement counselling which is a good idea. I got pre-death counselling and it was helpful for me. I don't want to go for bereavement counselling as it made me so much worse after my sister died.
I still miss Mom so much and miss the fun stuff we did. I don't miss sick Mom because she wasn't herself and she was unwell for so long as the dementia robbed her of her mind. We used to do everything together. It isn't in our culture for an adult child to take care of elderly parents, but it was the right thing for our family.
I am not making any sense. If someone could tell me what to do for my dad that would be great.
Elannah xox
This is not a fun sub-group to be in for sure. Losing a husband or boyfriend/lover whatever is devastating to all. I have a question for you. I am trying to help my dad cope through losing my mom. He is being invited to parties and receptions, out for dinner and to do stuff with his friends which I am eternally grateful.
He has a 50th anniversary party invite and doesn't want to go as my parents' 50th anniversary would have been in June and he just can't bear to go yet. I mean it has only been a month so I am not encouraging him to go at all. I don't want to set him back by any means.
He has an invite for a surprise 70th birthday party. He said that he thinks he will go to that. I hope he does because there is nothing significant or memorable about Mom's 70th birthday other than she had it.
How else can I support him through this. We are there for each other which is great. I am doing a lot better than he is for sure. Should I be doing anything else? I do all the laundry, all the cooking, I don't do much grocery shopping or anything to do with food decisions as my dad does all the shopping.(He knows I really don't like doing it). I just need to know how to take care of him. I wasn't married very long and I don't really know how to support a grieving man let along a dad. (I am crying now too. I am so sad and wish I could help him.) He said he would go to hospice for bereavement counselling which is a good idea. I got pre-death counselling and it was helpful for me. I don't want to go for bereavement counselling as it made me so much worse after my sister died.
I still miss Mom so much and miss the fun stuff we did. I don't miss sick Mom because she wasn't herself and she was unwell for so long as the dementia robbed her of her mind. We used to do everything together. It isn't in our culture for an adult child to take care of elderly parents, but it was the right thing for our family.
I am not making any sense. If someone could tell me what to do for my dad that would be great.
Elannah xox
