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Post by Basket1lady on Apr 29, 2016 17:05:40 GMT
I'll validate you. I'm the coordinator of our HS theatre volunteer group. All the above ideas are great ones, but in reality, some parents just don't care and others are genuinely busy volunteering in other spots. You can't tell your peers they have to work when you have no authority over another parent. And obviously the director is ineffective if it's gotten this far with no volunteers.
And our reimbursement is the same, but is quicker. You purchase items and then get reimbursed. The school district disbanded all the booster clubs 2 years ago and yes, it caused huge problems because they did not provide a way for those things to be paid for. To get a check from the school, you have to give one week's notice. And it's hard to say exactly how much food you need 1 week prior, as kids are constantly saying they can come after all, or drop suddenly.
Last week, we put up our biggest show of the year involving 132 kids from chorus, dance, orchestra and theatre, and art. (We're a performing arts high school.) It was a HUGE undertaking and it was the same few parents volunteering over and over again. We had volunteer spots go empty and I had a group of parents was complaining that we didn't do pre sales for tickets and that they had to stand in line "with everyone else." I just stated that I couldn't do everything and stared them down. They had over two months notice that we needed someone to do pre sales. The director and I sat down and decided what had to be done and what could be cut. Pre sales were cut.
Same thing with food. We feed the kids every night during the school week with volunteers. There is no charge and everyone is expected to provide something, with a goal of $25 per family. Meals are carefully chosen to have a mix of choices and easy foods for working parents to contribute, with different price points (such as 5 lbs of taco meat vs a bag of shredded cheese vs a box of cereal.) Saturday, parents had to provide their student's meal between the matinee and the evening performance. And who complained? Yup, the parents who contributed nothing. You just have to let that stuff go. Being the one in charge can stink sometimes.
I agree with the others who say that you are going to have to cut your staffing hours. Tell the director what you are willing to do and then walk away from the rest. I'm assuming that you are providing food for judges/volunteers? If it's important, the director will find someone. If it's not, provide water and a simple snack that you leave out and just staff it during the meal times. You can only do so much.
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Post by BeckyTech on Apr 29, 2016 17:09:38 GMT
If others don't sign-up, the event doesn't happen. THIS! Limit the hours that the hospitality room is open. Tell the other parents the room is only open for 4 hours or whatever on one of the days unless others step up. You need to step back or no one else will volunteer.
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Post by littlemama on Apr 29, 2016 17:13:39 GMT
I am "in charge" of the parents for baseball. If I don't get volunteers, I ask if anyone even wants to do the thing, and if I don't get resounding yesses, I cancel. (For example, last year, the parents wanted me to coordinate feeding the boys between double headers and at tournaments. This year, the first time I asked for volunteers, I heard crickets. I sent an email saying I wasn't getting a response and that we needed to decide as a group if this was something we wanted to do. A few said yes, a few said no, the majority either didn't answer or said they didn't care one way or the other. I cancelled and we are each feeding our own kids).
In your case, I would have let the band director know a while ago that there was a chance you would have to cancel the hospitality room due to lack of interest on the part of the parents. I would have had the days divided up into 2 hour shifts and I would not have allowed anyone to sign up for more than one, since you have plenty of people to share the time. Under no circumstances would I be putting in that much money ahead of time.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Apr 29, 2016 17:15:00 GMT
Can't rope my husband into helping since he is already aggrevated I have to purchase about $600-$700 worth of food and drinks and then wait to be reimbursed (which usually takes a month or longer). No is a complete sentence. So, what would they do if you were unable to put out nearly a grand for the snacks?!
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Post by realm on Apr 29, 2016 17:16:19 GMT
This seems to happen in so many situations that it is always the same few parents stepping up to help out. Personally I think the way to go is give people an option- either do XX amount of volunteer hours or contribute XX amount of money/pay higher registration fees. I think some of the parents who don't volunteer would be happy to contribute $ in lieu of volunteer hours and the others then have an incentive. And in the future I think there's nothing wrong with you limiting what you are able to do. If no one else steps forward to pick up the slack then it gets scaled back or cancelled. If anyone complains then it is up to them to help out next time.
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Post by 950nancy on Apr 29, 2016 17:25:45 GMT
No one appreciates a martyr, so stop being one. Go to the band director and outline what is happening. Tell him that unless he can convince other parents to participate, there will only be a hospitality room open when you are able to staff it with the 2 volunteers. Nothing is going to change unless you speak up with the director. As for the large amount of money out of pocket? Wouldn't be happening here. Heck, DH won't even front his company travel expense money. If they want him to travel, they will provide a company credit card or cash advance. You need to let the band director know that this is a major imposition on your family budget and expect payment ASAP - not a month or more down the line. I worked in a school for years and getting paid back the next month was the only way it worked. I am currently in an office and I get paid back about 48 hours after returning. They are just two different worlds.
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Post by shaniam on Apr 29, 2016 20:13:34 GMT
Thanks for the sympathy and advice. At this point, it is what it is. It has just been a mess trying to figure out what needs to be done and how to get it done. No one has been returning phone calls, texts, or emails. Even the restaurant didn't have my order for the dinner for tonight when I called this morning to confirm. Lots of frustration for me from this. I had to buy coffee and tea stuff and I don't drink those. When you don't drink coffee or tea and you are trying to buy it, it's a little overwhelming. We are hosting The Yellow Jackets (a famous jazz band) and they had some very specific requests. I've got everything set up now and hopefully the worst part of it is over so I can just enjoy the free time to play on my phone!
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Apr 29, 2016 23:30:50 GMT
You need to step back or no one else will volunteer. Any group that relies on volunteers will suck the life out of anyone who allows it. My grandmother always said, "if you want something done, ask the busiest person you know to do it." And she was right. This is in your lap because you are allowing it to happen. I feel you. I really do. I've fallen into that trap myself in the past. "If I don't do this, no one else will... and the group will suffer." Unfortunately, it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Only YOU can break the cycle.
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vanessa
Full Member
Posts: 142
Sept 15, 2015 4:25:10 GMT
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Post by vanessa on Apr 30, 2016 7:28:33 GMT
As the former leader of a grant-funded after school program, I have put on a band dinner for the parents and students pregame. It was an appreciation dinner and was free to them and about 2k out of my budget. I literally had people complain and scream about Their free meal that they didn't prepare or pay for or serve. Entitled assholes, the lot of them. Never pay out of pocket again!!!
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Post by Really Red on Apr 30, 2016 13:33:29 GMT
One thing I've found over the past 15 years of doing school stuff, is that if I break it down into manageable time, people are slightly more likely to help.
All - I am desperate. I either need you to commit to $10 or helping me 30 mns.
That's it. If you get the money, hire a kid to help.
Said the mom who is doing everything for the tennis team. Sigh.
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Jili
Pearl Clutcher
SLPea
Posts: 4,366
Jun 26, 2014 1:26:48 GMT
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Post by Jili on Apr 30, 2016 13:47:49 GMT
No one appreciates a martyr, so stop being one. Go to the band director and outline what is happening. Tell him that unless he can convince other parents to participate, there will only be a hospitality room open when you are able to staff it with the 2 volunteers. Nothing is going to change unless you speak up with the director. As for the large amount of money out of pocket? Wouldn't be happening here. Heck, DH won't even front his company travel expense money. If they want him to travel, they will provide a company credit card or cash advance. You need to let the band director know that this is a major imposition on your family budget and expect payment ASAP - not a month or more down the line. I worked in a school for years and getting paid back the next month was the only way it worked. I am currently in an office and I get paid back about 48 hours after returning. They are just two different worlds. Totally, and it's irritating. I am always amazed and impressed when my dh receives reimbursement within a matter of days. I shouldn't be impressed but it is so out of the realm of my own personal experience. I've had to wait 1-2 months for reimbursement.
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oaksong
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,167
Location: LA Suburbia
Site Supporter
Jun 27, 2014 6:24:29 GMT
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Post by oaksong on Apr 30, 2016 16:14:37 GMT
Sign-Up Genius!! It's amazing. A lot of people would like to help, but they're afraid if they volunteer, they'll be stuck with a huge job. Sign-Up Genius lets you break all of the activities down by day, time, contribution, etc.
You send a mass email out, and people click the link and sign up for what they can help with. Everyone can see what's open at any given point in time. Follow up with emails and phone calls if necessary. If there aren't volunteers for some things by the RSVP deadline, just cancel it if your appeals have not been answered.
I was the Fine Arts support team director for many years at my kids' high school. Once I built an email list at the beginning of the year, the rest was easy.
That being said, I feel your pain. Volunteering to chair large committees is a stressful job. I was going to say thankless, but the kids know they're being taken care of, and I'm sure your kids are proud of you for taking it on. Good luck!
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scrapaddie
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,090
Jul 8, 2014 20:17:31 GMT
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Post by scrapaddie on Apr 30, 2016 18:52:59 GMT
People respond better to a one on one ask rather than a general ask. Did your ask specific people? I think you should talk to the director and a policy should be established asking each family to help one time. Schedule can be made at the beginning of the season and people are responsible for finding their own subs. That leaves you with just the responsible kin to call or email a reminder a week ahead
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