So I've decided to boycott Mother's Day this year!

I used to get dragged to MIL and SIL events, which as far as I could tell was a lot of work for the ladies while the guys sat around chatting and "letting" us have a ladies day with the kids.

I spoke up and now I get anything I want. DH got the message and understood. The day is for me. Normally, I want fresh donuts for breakfast over lingering coffee in pjs, then time with my boys, and then order in dinner. I hate crowds and would rather have family time.

They always buy me small gifts and mushy cards, and I always order myself something I really want.

Not a bad mom at all {{hugs}}. I'm lucky because DH totally got it when the kids were little that all I wanted for Mother's Day was a day off and he would take them out for most of the day.

The last couple of years the only thing I have wanted is someone else to take care of making a nice dinner. 

Oh no, don't take on a single minute of guilt for this one. I remember telling my ex-husband once when the boys were little and we were juggling weekends in order for me to have Mother's Day that if he really wanted me to have a happy Mother's Day he would take the kids so I would have a nice quiet day that didn't involve me having to be a mom.

Being a mom is about the coolest thing ever, but damn if we don't need a break every now and then. 

I need to see this litter box, I might need one too!

My Mom and MIL are both gone now so it *could* be all about me. DH is another one that calls it a "Hallmark Holiday" but you know what? Without those so-called made up holidays how many people would stop for two seconds to think about their mom and recognize her for everything she does in some meaningful way? So what the heck, I'll take it because it's pretty much all I will get for quite some time. (ETA: My birthday comes not long after Christmas, so I usually get chumped for that, and since Valentine's Day is another manufactured holiday I don't get anything for that usually either. Like I said, I'll take what I can get.)

I had it out with DH about it a couple years ago when I mentioned something I wanted and he said, "Why are you telling me? You aren't *MY* mother."  NO, but I'm the mother of YOUR CHILD and if you don't teach her how to show appreciation, respect and caring for those she loves most, how is she ever going to learn? Needless to say, he packed her up in the car and took her out to the garden center and she helped him pick out a bunch of hanging plants for the house and a nice card.   

Now she's at the age where the teachers have them make something in class which is cute. If he doesn't help her pick something for me, I still have it covered LOL. Lego Dimensions was on sale this week at Target for half off, and I'll be darned if it didn't jump right into my cart!   I hid it in the closet, so if he gets me something else I'll give it to DD for her birthday, and if not, Happy Mother's Day to me! 

Mother's Day didn't start out as a Hallmark holiday.

www.history.com/topics/holidays/mothers-day

I would be angry too if our day was spent with me doing all the work to celebrate my mom and/or MIL. Around here the kids and dh do all the work that day. Neither of our parents live close. Dh sends something to his mom. My mom is anti-all holidays, so I don't do anything there or I would tuck her off.

But, I don't blame you for boycotting Leanne. Tell your dh to step up and make a reservation somewhere.

About 10 years ago, my dad decided that it would be nice if I would start throwing a Mother's day meal for his girl friend, as her kids did not celebrate it with her. Well, I did it for a 2 years, and she still treated my family like crap, so I said never again.

My girlfriends came to my rescue. There is a whole bunch of us, and their families that get together to celebrate our moms, who have all passed on. We do something different each year. Last year all the adults went out for a fancy meal. This year it is going to be great weather, so we are all meeting at a local hiking trail. Then we will come back to our house. The men will grill out, the kids (high school and college aged) will prep the sides. Us ladies will sit back and have a cocktail.

Then all of us, men included, will tell a favorite story about our moms. It works for us, and it is nice to be with friends. (both my mom and my mil have passed on).

Father's Day is coming, may I suggest some cat litter?

You're not in the minority. I feel pretty much exactly the same way.

My rule for Mother's Day is that I do not want to cook or clean and when the kids were little, I didn't want to watch children). What a good mom! We often will grab a KFC meal and go up into the mountains for a picnic or hike or just hang out. We always buy something for the house for MD and FD, so we don't have to buy gifts. That is nice. This will be my husband's first Mother's Day without his mom so I imagine it is going to be rough for him. Personally, I think all mothers should be celebrated (if they want) on their day by not having to cook or clean for anyone.

I'm half protesting.. Today I took Ds (3) card shopping. I got cards for my mom and grandmas from me and from the kids. But I didn't get anything for mil. I do have an art project planned that I was going to do with the kids for the great grandmas and the grandmas, so she'll get one of those, but I didn't get her any cards. Last year dh gave the card dd picked out for me to his mom from her and I didn't get a card (even though we had picked out one for his mom from her with him). Dh mentioned in passing a week or so ago mother's day, but no follow up. My mom will be out of town with her mom so I'm off the hook there, plus we did dinner with them last night. I know mil is expecting something, since I have arranged it or at least forced dh to arrange it the last 10 years. But it is always all about her (not just at mother's day, but even more so on mother's day). My parents have both gotten me cards since I became a mother, even my younger sister has gotten me cards. Nothing ever from the inlaws. Mil had complained in years past when we have gone to see my grandma that she doesn't have anyone to celebrate with - she has two daughters that didn't make it a priority to visit. So since then if we went (5 hours away) I made sure we were back to take her out to dinner. 

Dh is generally horrible with holidays/gifts. One in every 10-20 he nails it. For our anniversary this year (10 years) he upgraded my diamond earrings, I was floored. Really I would be happy if he could put thought into a card from him and take the kids to get me cards (5yrs, 3yrs, 6wks). I didn't need stuff (especially since I just got a new car), but some thought being put into it would be nice. We got in a huge fight two years ago over it because he did nothing and it got turned around on me that I was spoiled and a bunch of other not nice stuff was said. The next day he brought me flowers and apologized. I thought he learned, but last year we were back to a card from him and him screwing up the card from dd. 

I always tell myself not to get my expectations raised, but I am still sad when he does nothing.  Thankfully the rest of the time he is pretty great. 

For our anniversary last week, DH bought me a black light to look for cat urine.  In his defense,  I asked for one, and he didn't wrap it up or call it a gift or anything, he just paid for it.

Mother's Day is better some year than others. I'm doing all the cooking and cleaning this year, but can't help but feel fortunate to do it. For the first time in five years, I'll have all four of my boys under my roof sleeping the night before and waking up with me for Mother's Day morning. With three of them grown, two serving in the Navy, one just back from deployment, and so forth... it's quite an accomplishment! And my own mother who is 90 years old is here, too.

Now next year I may bitch because some don't call or send a card... but this year? I'm happy to be a cleaning, cooking, busy-as-a-bee mama with all her little chicks in her nest.