Dumb things your DH or SO have done . . .

When we had our conversion van years ago, the lock on the spare tire rusted. DH drove to the hardware store, rented a bolt cutter, drove home, and cut off the lock. Then he had to drive back to the hardware store to return bolt cutter. I asked him "Why didn't you cut off the lock AT the hardware store?"

His latest was he was running a temp of 102 and didn't want to call the doctor. Seriously? He's the guy with cancer that had a heart attack 2 months ago. We called the doctor.

Aww, poor guy.

I once went through the sales paper and wrote down all the things that we needed that were on sale at store A (including some things that weren't "needs" but were good deals) - he went to the wrong store and bought all the items on the list at store B for full price. From now on I put prices in parentheses on any grocery list he'll be using.

Another time, he accidentally flushed a stick of deodorant down the toilet (he swears it jumped off the shelf behind the toilet and plunged in right as the water was flushing) - the stick of deodorant ended up getting stuck inside the toilet and we had to buy a new one.

Oh, and he froze his beer.

We have a small chest freezer with a temperature regulator on it to keep it at 34 degrees instead of freezing. There's a probe that goes inside it to ensure it stays at the right temp. Necessary to prevent the kegs and bottles from freezing as well as his live yeast that he was saving for a later batch.

While re-arranging things to make sure the new keg would fit, dh managed to pull out the probe and didn't see it. The freezer ran like it's supposed to and froze everything. 10 bottles of beer frozen. Two of them exploded in the freezer. The one keg of what was probably one of his best batches yet froze. That was a fun clean up.

I swear, he's absent-minded and often has tunnel vision. He also lost the baggie of screws we had that is for the window a/c units. I have to keep track of more than I'd like to.

Hope he is ok

One of the most memorable was when he locked the keys in the car. We were at the end of the honeymoon, on the way to the airport, just stopping for some last minute gifts. This is not an infrequent occurrence with him and now both of us carry spare keys in our wallets just in case he strikes again.

Another was when he ignored my concerns, our tire flew off the vehicle, and we ended up having to walk for 4 hours in the rain to get to a hotel. No cell phones back then. Turned out to be a lovely, relaxing weekend that we needed towards the end of our wedding planning.

Once, when the Internet was new.....
We had a cat who was pregnant and neither of us knew how long a cat's pregnancy is - he decided to look it up on the Internet. Only, he didn't know what to search for....pregnant pussy is NOT recommended

8-9 years ago (this week!) he ruined our anniversary weekend trip by falling off a ladder and shattering both wrists. He had climbed a 6' ladder to check out the attic opening in our 12' high garage. I spent our anniversary sleeping next to his hospital bed, he had surgery to rebuild the wrists, and then I got to be his personal nurse and attend to his hygienic needs for two weeks.

Yes, he is better, thanks! He spent three days in the hospital, though.

There may not be enough room in one post to list them all, so I'll just name some of the biggies.

-Put an axe through the top of his foot while chopping wood at a campground in the ass end of nowhere. Six stitches done at no charge by the local vet !

-Nearly put his eye out with the plug of an electric shovel that he yanked out of the outlet instead of walking over and unplugging it.

-Fell out of the shower and dislocated his finger as he crashed through the towel rod AND the top of the cat box (damn cat!! LOL!!).

-Landed wrong during a skydiving outing and got a compound fracture of his left ankle requiring surgery, hardware and all the fun follow up.

I love this guy with all my heart, but I think I equally love the fact that we have great insurance.

It's a lengthy list full of both funny and not-so-funny things. Funny (or at least easily forgivable) are the countless pairs of sunglasses that he's lost over the years in dumb ways. There was the pair lost when his kayak flipped in the ocean. Or the pair that was on the roof of the car when he drove off one day.

Speaking of the roof of the car...

Thanksgiving 1996 - I had flown back to Philly to see my parents for the holiday, and DH stayed home by himself. On Thanksgiving morning, he put his bike on the roofrack of the car and went off for a bike ride. That night when I talked to him, he sheepishly said, "I did something stupid." Yeah... He had come home from his ride and pulled into the garage as usual, but FORGOT THE BIKE WAS ON THE ROOF! (Now, this car had a moonroof that was always open, so I'm not sure exactly how he missed that important detail.) The bike was fine - the trip computer on the handlebars was broken, but that's it. But my car! (And yes, it was MY car.) It had four dimples in the roof from where the rack attached to it. DH promised me that we'd get it fixed asap. Yeah, no. Three years later, right before we had to turn it in at the end of the lease, was when they were finally fixed. 

Gotta love 'im. 

not my DH but a friend's. she told her DH to mail her old cell phone to her sister. he packs it up and mails it. the sister calls a few days later and asks where the phone is. oh, there it is..in the mailbox at home....because he mailed it to my friend. we will never let him live that down.

A long time ago....hubby saw that I had pinned an engagement ring I loved.
So hubby orders it, put our home number down as his contact, not work or cell but home.
The company calls and asks for him, I respond he's not here this is his girlfriend can I help you.
The girl responds, yes this is blah blah from blah blah wanting to confirm his order for the engagement ring and wedding band set.

It took all of my strength to not tell him I knew. I waited untill after he got it and told him. He was pissed at the company, he called them and got me some pretty nice earings for free.


He now always leaves his cell number.

I'm afraid I am the one to do dumb stuff in our relationship. Like the time I crashed his SUV unto a cement wall. I still cringe about that and it was a post 2 years ago.