River
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,575
Location: Alabama
Jun 26, 2014 15:26:04 GMT
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Post by River on Jun 6, 2016 21:51:33 GMT
OP: your story broke my heart, but I'm so thankful you shared it. Your words were raw and true which makes them heartbreakingly beautiful. They deserve to be shared.
As for the victim, All I can do is scream. What she woke up to learn, then go through hell for a year, get the unanimous guilty verdict and yet very little justice. I shutter to think what he would have done, how much more damage he'd have caused if those two men hadn't come across them. No way he would have stopped at just fingering her (which to me IS rape), and saying "just fingering" makes me ill, but that's what I keep reading from the dirt bags supporters.
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Post by nurseypants on Jun 6, 2016 22:01:15 GMT
I just reported that FB page. I've never done that before. I hope FB takes it down.
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Post by hop2 on Jun 6, 2016 22:12:03 GMT
This is what we are as a society. It is shameful. Men don't seem to ever pay for rape, well unless they are poor, or not a citizen or on drugs or something else 'unacceptable'. It's like raping a woman ( or girl ) isn't enough of a crime it only counts if there's some other mitigating factor? Like WTF? Everyday males can just smile, look nice in court, and attack the victim in court and it either all goes away or it's barely a slap on the wrist. It sickens me.
Don't even get me started on 'rich' or 'famous' rapists because they will downright destroy a victims life.
OP, I'm sorry you deal with all of that. Your words are powerful. I wish we could all email that to the judge
How would he feel about the affect on the rapist's lufe if the victim was his mother or sister or daughter?
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DEX
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,396
Aug 9, 2014 23:13:22 GMT
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Post by DEX on Jun 6, 2016 22:12:07 GMT
Awwwww, so much to say but I am sure it has all been said before.
My wish for him would be to spend time in prison where he would be Bubba's bitch for 20" a day every day. I know not happening.
OP thank you for posting. It must have been horrific and with lasting consequences. You were heard today. Loud and clear.
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Post by papercrafteradvocate on Jun 6, 2016 22:26:34 GMT
I just reported that FB page. I've never done that before. I hope FB takes it down. That is a great idea! Off to report it!!
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Post by originalvanillabean on Jun 6, 2016 22:51:41 GMT
OP- my heart goes out to you.
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Post by Freefallfast on Jun 6, 2016 23:04:13 GMT
I wonder if the mother of the convicted rapist has anything to say.
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Post by papercrafteradvocate on Jun 6, 2016 23:04:53 GMT
And it's either down or it was made private!
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Post by littlefish on Jun 6, 2016 23:14:47 GMT
Both of your voices are brave and strong. Keep using them.
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Post by sparkyduchess on Jun 6, 2016 23:22:47 GMT
OP, I'm so sorry you went through that, and that this has caused you further pain. This whole thing is sickening, reminds me so much of the Ched Evans case here. I cried reading the victims letter yesterday and the fathers excuses were nauseating.
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Post by vjlau on Jun 6, 2016 23:36:27 GMT
I have been following this story, and it makes me sick. The judge is out of his mind. The rapist thinks he's above the law. The father is an ass. 6 months is nothing!! I read the victim's statement, and I was so moved, by it. It really made me feel the impact of what's happened to her. Devastating!
As for the OP. I'm so sorry for what happened to you. ((hugs))
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eleezybeth
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,784
Jun 28, 2014 20:42:01 GMT
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Post by eleezybeth on Jun 6, 2016 23:41:21 GMT
It makes me sick and angry.
I hate vengeful justice but in certain situations I'd love to see someone take this into their own hands. I hope that judge loses his job.
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Post by bc2ca on Jun 7, 2016 0:26:20 GMT
Would you be willing to write a letter to this judge? Clearly he does not understand the gravity of this man's crime. It might not change the outcome of this case, but could affect others. I'm so sorry for what happened to you. I like this idea. It is proactive, especially in a time that I feel particularly helpless. I won't be able to write or describe what happened as eloquently as the victim did in her letter to the rapist but it is certainly worth the effort. I think your OP was incredibly powerful and eloquent 3jaysanc and am so, so sorry this happened to you. I really think the judge in this case has missed the part where any sexual assault has a profound impact on the victim forever. Thanks for linking that response to the father's letter @luvspaper, it says so much of what I wanted to like: "This is a steep price to pay for 20 minutes of action i.e. raping someone out of his 20 plus years of life. This isn't like the three second rule for food, rape still counts no matter how many seconds it lasts. This is rape." I'm having a really hard time with the dad referring to a rape as "20 minutes of action" .
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brandy327
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,353
Jun 26, 2014 16:09:34 GMT
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Post by brandy327 on Jun 7, 2016 0:27:37 GMT
OP, I'm so sorry for what happened to you.
I can't add anything original to what's been said but I agree. It's disgusting and nothing but a slap in the face to the victim.
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Post by epeanymous on Jun 7, 2016 0:47:32 GMT
OP, that was one powerful post. I hope that people like you, and like the victim in this case, can help people understand the profound effects of sexual assault.
You guys know, I was a criminal defense attorney, and I represented men who committed rape. There are ways for judges and attorneys and families to handle cases where defendants do terrible things, and I absolutely defend (sorry to re-use the word) the appropriateness of having the state put to its test of proof and of permitting the defendant and the family to present a picture to the judge that permits the judge to render a fair sentence. There are appropriate and inappropriate ways to go about it, however, and I have a really hard time with how this case was handled at sentencing.
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Post by Tamhugh on Jun 7, 2016 1:06:38 GMT
Would you be willing to write a letter to this judge? Clearly he does not understand the gravity of this man's crime. It might not change the outcome of this case, but could affect others. I'm so sorry for what happened to you. I like this idea. It is proactive, especially in a time that I feel particularly helpless. I won't be able to write or describe what happened as eloquently as the victim did in her letter to the rapist but it is certainly worth the effort. You are wrong. Your post was incredibly eloquent. Use that as your letter to the judge. I am so sorry for your experience.
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Post by andreasmom on Jun 7, 2016 1:44:49 GMT
3jaysanc big big (((hugs))) You have been through so much. Your post was incredibly raw and real. It would be great if you sent it in as an op ed for any newspaper/blog. I want to hug that 13 year old you and not let go. I don't have enough words.
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Post by dewryce on Jun 7, 2016 2:05:29 GMT
I wonder how his defenders would feel if THEY were "just fingered" while unconscious.
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kate
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,583
Location: The city that doesn't sleep
Site Supporter
Jun 26, 2014 3:30:05 GMT
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Post by kate on Jun 7, 2016 2:09:34 GMT
OP, your story brought tears to my eyes, but I forced myself to read it through carefully. I'm so very sorry for what you went through.
I read most of the victim's statement on FB yesterday - I couldn't finish it, because I felt so sick to my stomach. I felt sicker knowing the victim herself didn't have the luxury of not finishing the story.
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Post by Anita on Jun 7, 2016 2:25:26 GMT
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 7, 2024 17:25:36 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2016 2:32:18 GMT
OP, I am so sorry for what you have endured. You are so very brave to speak up and share your story. It breaks my heart that you have been victimized all over again by seeing this horrible miscarriage of justice. I agree with those who suggested you send your post as a letter to the judge - it's extremely powerful.
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PaperAngel
Prolific Pea
Posts: 7,799
Jun 27, 2014 23:04:06 GMT
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Post by PaperAngel on Jun 7, 2016 2:55:32 GMT
OP: While no one should have to endure your teen experience, you are a survivor who refused to let a man's (wrong, immoral, & illegal) decision/action define you. You're not just a victim of sexual assault, but a daughter/sister/partner/parent/friend/neighbor/employee/etc. & an advocate for others who've had similar experiences. Although I cannot imagine how difficult it is to share your experience, please know your voice is heard & has made a significant contribution to the discussion today. Please take care of yourself.
To all the other women out there, who silently live with reminders of a man's unwanted "20 minutes of action:" you did not deserve the pain/self-doubt/etc. he inflicted on you. May you find peace & happiness during your journey.
Sadly, I believe the lenient sentence & reaction favoring the young man in this case is because this scenario happens frequently. Society incorrectly labels & accepts it as making out (under the influence), since pregnancy is not a risk & alcohol is involved. Given the sports culture & social class conscientiousness in this country, this young man may have never been called out or had consequences for his actions. While his punishment may not be a lengthy jail time, bans from swimming & Stanford stop the accolades, recognition, & status he (& his parents) worked toward his entire life. This young man's decision/action that night not only completely changed his life, but also the life of his victim whose name he doesn't even know. Thankfully, the two graduate students were better decision makers; this story may have ended more tragically if these two men had not decided to bike to a party or get involved. I hope confronting her attacker in court helps the victim heal & move forward with her life; she did not deserve what happened to her!
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Post by papercrafteradvocate on Jun 7, 2016 3:03:34 GMT
So now the douchebag dad made a statement to the media that "his words are being misrepresented by people"
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Post by hop2 on Jun 7, 2016 3:17:25 GMT
So now the douchebag dad made a statement to the media that "his words are being misrepresented by people" Kind of hard to 'misrepresent' calling RAPE '20 minutes of action' IMHO he's as bad as his son if he can ( and did ) excuse in anyway what his son did. There us NO excuse for having sex with an unconcious person. Period. Him, the judge & the rapist are vile excuses for humans.
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ComplicatedLady
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,083
Location: Valley of the Sun
Jul 26, 2014 21:02:07 GMT
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Post by ComplicatedLady on Jun 7, 2016 3:38:09 GMT
OP I couldn't read and not respond. You are an amazing woman. You are a survivor. Your post was very powerful. This story already sickened me. Reading the OP, I could feel the pain, the anger, and the helplessness. It made this Stanford story sicken me that much more. No one should ever have to experience what you did and no one should ever get away with making another human being experience that.
If it's possible, I hope his appeal backfires and he gets an even longer sentence. I don't know if that's possible, but if anyone deserves it, it's this guy.
That tweet of the 'modified' statement was awesome too.
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smginaz Suzy
Pearl Clutcher
Je suis desole.
Posts: 2,606
Jun 26, 2014 17:27:30 GMT
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Post by smginaz Suzy on Jun 7, 2016 4:25:25 GMT
] Here is a revised version of the rapist's father's statement. Brought to you by @alexandraozeri, in what is to date her one and only tweet.
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Post by JBeans on Jun 7, 2016 4:29:33 GMT
I'm sorry about what happened to you. This case is upsetting. They did the same thing with Trayvan Martin. It's ridiculous to use photos that make criminals look like choirboys. OP, I'm so sorry for what you've been through and how this incident causes many of those emotions to well back up. I wonder if the asshole father would be singing the same tune if someone beat the shit out his son for 20 minutes. Well, Trayvon Martin was a victim, not a suspect. I don't recall anyone taking a mugshot of a corpse to use as a photo of the victim in other cases. And I don't care what GZ claimed as far as self-defense, in that particular case there was no evidence that TM was doing anything other than lawfully walking home in his father's neighborhood until GZ decided to play vigilante and confronted him. Not exactly mugshot worthy if you ask me. TM may have had issues, but at the time of his death, he was a victim. However, most of the time, when someone is accused of a crime and arrested, the mugshot gets posted, not there sports promo photo. Did we see OJ's Heisman photo or his mugshot? You took the bait. Don't take the bait.
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azredhead
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,755
Jun 25, 2014 22:49:18 GMT
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Post by azredhead on Jun 7, 2016 4:43:36 GMT
It was brave and strong of you to post what you did. It makes my heart hurt for you. I just can't even imagine. I hope he get hell in jail and after I also hope he gets a longer sentence and someone who has some human decency. . I don't know how the judge can sleep at night. I don't have much for any one who does this kind of harm to someone and 'gets away with a slap on the wrist', let a lone think they walk away from it unaffected. It's worse what the father said. I only had to read the one statement and what was posted here. I couldn't stomach the rest of his letter. I hope that this can help victims speak out and change what happens.
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Post by scrappintoee on Jun 7, 2016 6:02:38 GMT
OP----I am so, so sorry for all that you've gone through!!!! ((( hugs )))
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Post by myshelly on Jun 7, 2016 6:30:52 GMT
I just read her entire statement. She is brilliant and amazing and I hope that this reaches epic proportions. What he did, his lawyer did, and then the judge--criminal at best. What actions of his lawyer do you object to?
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